Chapter 17
Chapter Seventeen
Blaise decided to distract herself from the Darcy drama by doing something productive.
She now stood in front of the mirror in the bedroom, tugging lightly at the hem of a soft knit top, then stepped back and assessed it with a critical eye.
It was vintage Chanel, and while the soft peach color was good on her, the fabric clung in a way that felt too casual. Or too revealing. Or both. Would it be better with a jacket? Maybe. But then she might look like she was trying too hard.
Beau snoozed on the bed, uninterested in her quest for the perfect outfit.
With a soft sigh, she took the top off and hung it back up, carefully replacing the dust cover over the shoulders to keep it pristine.
Maybe the polka dot Dolce & Gabbana blouse was the way to go.
Black and white was classic. She could pair it with her white Rag & Bone jeans.
Not that they were likely to see her from the waist down.
She put her hands on her hips and stared into her closet, trying to decide.
The video call wasn’t until Monday, which meant she had time. Too much time, maybe. Time to imagine how she’d look on screen, how she’d sound, what she’d say, and whether she’d come across as composed or tentative or like someone trying too hard to be taken seriously.
She went toward the rack again and slid hangers aside, fingers brushing familiar fabrics. She wanted something that said capable without saying past her prime. It also needed to be comfortable enough that she wouldn’t be tempted to adjust it while she talked.
That eliminated a few things right off the bat. A blazer really did feel too dressed up. She wasn’t pitching a corporate strategy. A flowy blouse felt like she was trying too hard. Maybe black was too severe, but white felt somehow unserious.
She held up a deep blue pin-striped button-down and tilted her head. It had structure even though it was soft. She’d worn it to a charity luncheon with Jay years ago. She’d paired it with a tailored white jacket and pants. It photographed well, she remembered that.
But how would it work on its own?
She slipped it on and studied herself in the mirror again. Not bad. Needed the right accessories, obviously.
Her laptop sat open on the desk in the bedroom, the manuscript visible on the screen like a quiet reminder of this new chapter of her life. She hadn’t meant to leave it there, but part of her liked having it close. It was also a reminder of why the call was happening.
And honestly, this wasn’t about how she looked. It was about the story she was telling and this amazing chance to rewrite what happened to her next.
Still, appearances counted. She wasn’t na?ve. She knew that better than anyone.
She reached for a pearl necklace, put it on, took it off again. Too much. Tried another. Still wrong. She set both back in the jewelry box. She could figure it out later. Maybe a scarf.
Blaise exhaled and sat on the edge of the bed, hands braced on either side of her, the outfit question still unresolved. She really ought to get back to writing.
Her phone rang.
She glanced at the screen and felt that familiar tightening as Evan’s name lit up. She shouldn’t feel that way when her son called, but he had a way of pushing her buttons these days.
“Hey,” Blaise said, answering the call. “How are you?”
“Fine. You?”
He didn’t sound fine. “I’m good. Everything okay?”
“Yeah. I mean—I guess,” Evan said. There was a pause on the line, long enough that Blaise knew something was up. “I just…I saw your website.”
Her shoulders tightened a fraction. How had he found that? She hadn’t exactly sent out a notice. “You did?”
“Yeah.” Another pause. “I’m guessing that’s new.”
“It is,” she said carefully. “Why do you sound like it’s bothering you?”
He exhaled, and she could hear him shift, like he was pacing. “I don’t love it.”
Blaise closed her eyes for a moment and lay down on the bed. She opened her eyes to stare at the ceiling. Beau woke up and came to snuggle. “Well, thanks for that vote of confidence.”
“Mom, I didn’t mean...” His voice softened. “I’m not saying it’s bad. It looks good. Professional. I just, I don’t know about you putting yourself out there again.”
Again. There it was.
She didn’t say a word, just waited for him to get the rest of it out of his system.
“I don’t think it’s a good idea to make yourself so…accessible,” Evan went on. “What if someone actually contacts you?”
“Then I might get a job out of it. A paying job.”
“And you might not. Look what happened the last time you trusted someone. It didn’t go well. I just don’t want to see you get taken advantage of. Or hurt. Or…used.”
Blaise let out a slow breath through her nose and tried to maintain her patience. “I appreciate that you’re worried about me,” she said. “I really do. But this isn’t the same thing.”
“How is it not?” he asked. “You’re making yourself visible. You’re inviting attention. Literally.”
“I’m making an effort to get work in an attempt to make my financial situation a little more livable,” she said. “And I’m doing it on my terms this time. I’m not signing anything blindly. I’m asking questions. I have people in my corner this time. I even have an attorney I can call.”
“That doesn’t mean you won’t get hurt.”
“No,” Blaise agreed. “It doesn’t. But avoiding everything that carries risk isn’t living, either. You don’t know what it’s like to be my age and have to think about where every penny goes.”
There was silence on the line. She refused to be the first one to break it.
“I just don’t want to see you hurt. Or disappointed,” Evan said finally.
“I know,” she said. “And I love you for that. But disappointment isn’t the worst thing that can happen to a person. Wondering what if? That’s definitely worse.”
He didn’t say anything right away.
Something nudged at her. The same question she’d had when he’d first called. “Evan,” she said. “How did you even find my website? It’s only just launched.”
Another pause. Longer this time.
“I—well,” he said, and she could hear the hesitation now, clear as day. “I have Google Alerts set up. For your name.”
She sat up and her jaw dropped. “You what?”
“It’s not like I’m stalking you,” he said quickly. “It’s just alerts. If your name pops up somewhere new, I get a notification. I set it up a while ago. After everything that happened. It felt like the right thing to do.”
Blaise straightened. “You didn’t think to tell me?”
“I didn’t think it was a big deal,” he said. “I was just keeping an eye out. Making sure nothing weird was going on.”
“I don’t need you monitoring me,” she said, more sharply than she’d intended. She reined it in, but not all the way. “I’m your mother, Evan. Not your child. And certainly not someone who needs to be tracked. I made one mistake that, yes, had big consequences, but it could have happened to anyone.”
“I’m not trying to control you.”
“Really?” she said. “Because that’s what it feels like.”
The silence that followed was brittle.
“I did it because I care,” he said quietly.
“I don’t doubt that,” Blaise replied. “But caring doesn’t mean crossing boundaries. I need you to turn those off.”
He hesitated. “Okay.”
“Okay,” she repeated. “Thank you.” He would freak out if he knew about the podcast and the possible book deal. She had to be the one to tell him about those things, but in her own time.
She took a breath, needing to calm down a little. “I’m not trying to shut you out,” she added. “I just need you to trust that I know what I’m doing. Or at least understand that I’m allowed to live my life my way.”
“I’m trying,” he said. “I really am.”
“I’m glad to hear that. Before we hang up,” Blaise said, softening her tone. “There’s something else I should probably tell you. I’ve been asked to be on a podcast and I’m doing it.” That was close enough to telling him she’d already done it.
“A podcast?” Evan said.
“Yes. One of my friends is launching it. It’s about reinvention and second acts. She thought my story might resonate with people.” Blaise paused, choosing her words. “I’m not sure when the interview will be out, but I’m looking forward to it.”
There was a beat. “That’s…actually kind of cool,” Evan said. He sounded surprised but not displeased. “Is it a big one?”
“No,” Blaise said. “It’s brand new. In fact, I’m the inaugural guest. But that’s part of why it feels right. I’ve had some real highs and lows in my life and why not share them? Maybe someone will learn from my mistakes.”
“I guess that makes sense,” he said. “You’ve always been good at sharing and wanting what’s best for others.”
She smiled faintly. “I hope that comes across.”
“I’m sure it will.”
She hesitated, then shifted the focus. “How are you and Casey doing?”
Another pause, this one familiar. “We’re okay,” Evan said. “Still trying. Still waiting. Some days are easier than others.”
“I imagine,” Blaise said gently. Wanting a baby and not being able to have one was hard. “It’s a lot to deal with.”
“Casey’s tired of doctors’ offices,” he admitted. “Tired of hearing the same things over and over. But she’s hanging in there.”
Blaise closed her eyes briefly. “Please tell her I’m thinking about her. Both of you. And if she ever wants to talk, about any of it, I’m here.”
“I will,” Evan said. “She knows that. We both do.”
There was a quiet moment after that, and the tension between them eased just a little, replaced by something warmer.
They said their goodbyes a few minutes later, the conversation ending much more gently than it had started. Blaise lowered the phone and sat there, staring at the closed closet door.
She scooped Beau into her arms and kissed the top of his head. She hadn’t chosen an outfit, but she knew one thing for certain.
She wasn’t going to let anyone, no matter how much they loved her, decide where her life was going next.