Chapter Fifty-Four – Dylan
For the first time in what feels like an eternity, being awake doesn’t feel like a black hole is swallowing me. The storm has passed, and this morning, the sun is out again, its rays trying to cut through the blinds.
Fawn is fast asleep next to me, her curly hair all over the place, drool dripping down her chin, soaking into the pillow. Gross but perfect. It’s stupid, but it’s the little things I missed the most.
Of course, losing my mom feels like someone sliced me open and ripped out a piece of my soul.
The pain hasn’t lessened at all, and I know it never will.
The thing is, I think I was secretly conditioning myself for my mom’s death.
Her soul was fading way before her body.
You mourn them while they’re still sitting in front of you, still breathing.
But I’ll find a way through it, because Fawn is here with me.
She’s real, not just a memory or a what-if.
Fear still lingers; I’m frightened she will leave me again, that if I give her an inch, she will be gone.
I need to be by her at all times, protect her from everything, but that’s not how you treat love.
Torin eases back the covers, his movements calculated. I don’t think he knows I’m awake. His face is tight, anger radiating off him. Perhaps he didn’t sleep at all, but then, it hits me — the coach, the blackmail, the betrayal. Fuck, I’m reminded of it all.
Torin begins pulling on his jeans with quick, jerky motions.
“Psst,” I sound quietly, trying not to disturb Fawn. “Where are you going?”
He avoids eye contact. “Don’t ask questions you don’t want the answer to.”
He’s going to talk to the coach. Naturally, a part of me wants to go with him. Hell, we trusted that guy since we were kids. He was there for every big win, every bad loss, but then he pulls some evil crap and does this to us . . . to Fawn.
Right now, I’m empty, too empty to be angry the way I want to be. I already lost my mom and Fawn once. I am not going to lose Torin too.
“I don’t wanna lose you, Torin.”
Finally, his eyes meet mine, and his hand pauses at his belt. Just a fraction, his face softens. “You won’t, dude. I promise. Stay here with Fawn, and I’ll be back soon.”
He starts walking toward the door.
“Hey,” I loudly whisper, making him pause. “Leave a mark he won’t forget.”
A sinister smirk spreads across his face. He nods once, and then he’s gone.
For a moment, I want to follow him, ready for whatever he’s going to do, but I don’t. I can’t leave Fawn. There’s no way in hell I’m letting her wake up alone again — not after what we’ve all been through. I trust Torin with our lives, and he’ll do what is best for our girl. He always does.
Suddenly, Fawn’s hair tumbles over her shoulders, and she stirs beside me. Her eyebrows start twitching, whimpers escaping her lips.
“No . . . No. Don’t go. I need you—” she sobs, eyes still shut, voice breaking.
She’s obviously having a bad dream, and there’s not much I can do. My chest contracts, and the need takes over. I wrap an arm around her as if I could protect her from the visions her mind creates.
“Princess,” I say in a soothing voice, “listen to my voice. You’re okay.”
In a state of panic, her eyes flutter open, filled with tears, scanning my face as if she isn’t sure I’m really there. “I thought . . . I thought I’d lost you forever—” she cries. “You left me.”
Hearing those words leave her mouth kills me. After everything, I could never leave her.
Cautiously, I move a strand of hair out of her face and press a kiss to her forehead, then her temple. Kissing every inch of her face, I want to prove I’m here and not going anywhere.
My hands come to rest on her lower back, and I hold her as if it would keep the world from taking her away from me. “It was just a bad dream,” I tell her, knowing it felt real to her. “I’m here, and I’m never leaving you. We’re all together again.”
Her whole body vibrates as she tries to catch her breath. I don’t move or say a word, letting her set the pace, letting her feel the beat of my heart against her cheek.
Her hands are tracing the necklace as if it’s a lifeline. I observe her, swallowing hard; I know that necklace has seen more of her fears than anyone should.
Finally, she looks up at me, her lashes still wet. “How is your hand this morning?”
I want to laugh. We’ve all been through an ordeal, and she worries about me.
Shaking my head, I trace the edge of her cheek with my thumb. “Oh, Fawn, you’re something else, you know that? But yeah, my hand is fine. Nothing I haven’t handled before.” I pause, gesturing toward the blanket. “How are your feet?”
She wriggles her legs under the blankets, as if testing them, then shrugs. “Still there and feeling better.” But then, her eyes widen, and she looks past me. I feel her body tense up as she raises her head slightly. “Wait! Where’s Torin?”
Fuck.
Shit.
I am incapable of lying to her. What I need is a word between truth and lie.
“He had to respond to an emergency call-out,” I state carefully. It’s not a lie, as there was, in fact, an emergency. I will just leave out the part about how Torin will probably beat the crap out of the coach.
She looks at my face for a moment longer before relaxing and lying back against the pillow. Thank fuck for that. She’s totally bought it.
“That dream was horrible, Dylan,” she whispers, looking up at the ceiling. “I really thought I’d lost you again. It felt so real.”
I shift closer. “Give me your hand.”
Her fingers mesh with mine, and I guide her hand to press flat on my chest. “Feel that?” I whisper. “That is me, princess. I am here with you.”
She exhales and then nods. I lean toward her lips, but as usual, she holds me at bay. “Uh, my morning breath.”
I smile against her lips and say, “Fuck your breath.”
Quickly, my lips lock onto hers. Our tongues fight, a wet, desperate tangling.
Fuck, I missed the taste of her. I missed every fucking part of her.
A small groan escapes my chest as my hand shifts from her hip to underneath her shirt. My thumb finds her nipple, which is already puckered, and I play with it slowly between my fingers.
She gasps into my mouth, her back arching. “Hmm.”
My hands become more urgent. I push the T-shirt up; her dusky pink nipples are begging for my mouth.
Suddenly, she pulls back, winded. “Dylan. Stop. Are you sure you want to continue? With everything that’s happened, the loss of your mother—”
I press a finger against her lips, halting any words that might force me back into that empty, gray world. “Shh. I want to forget it all, Fawn. I have you, and that’s all that matters right now.”
She sizes up my eyes, showing concern, then she exhales with a deep sigh as if surrendering, and kisses me.
“I’ve missed the taste of you,” I breathe against her lips when we break for air. I pull back just enough to look into her eyes. “Let me make you feel better after that bad dream.”
She scoffs. “I think after everything, it should be me making you feel better.”
“You make me feel better by being here with that beautiful smile.” I run my finger along her lips. “So, no. Remember, princess, I don’t give to receive.”
I guide her with my hands on her hips until she’s straddling my lap. The heat of her pussy, even through my boxers, makes my cock twitch.
Holding two fingers up, I place them on her lips. “Now, you know what to do,” I order. “Get them wet.”
She doesn’t wait. Her lips close over my fingers, her tongue dancing around them, leaving them slick with her spit. Watching her eyes glued to mine as she sucks on my fingers like they’re my cock makes my hips thrust before I can stop them.
“That’s a good girl,” I coo.
I pull my damp fingers out of her mouth and push aside the thin fabric of her panties. My fingertips make contact with the clit. I slowly tease it, watching for reactions on her face.
“Oh, princess,” I groan. “I’ve missed your beautiful pussy.”
Her pussy starts grinding. God, the feeling is intense. My cock is straining against my boxers, begging to be freed, wanting nothing more than to sink inside her and feel her grip around me.
She lets out a broken moan, her head falling back. “Fuck, I’ve missed you.”
I’m silently praying that I do not cum in my boxers.
“Have you missed my cock?”
“Mhmmm.”
My fingers move quicker, and I concentrate on her clit, pressing just right. Her breath comes in short gasps, and her nails dig into my six-pack.
“Yes, yes. I’m so close.”
“Come for me, princess. I’ve missed that voice cry out.”
I quicken my speed, and my wrists ache from the effort. All of her body goes stiff, then she lets out a sharp, vocal cry that bursts from her throat as she comes. “I’m coming! I’m uhh—”
I feel the rapid, warm rush of her orgasm seeping through my boxers.
She collapses on top of me, her whole body vibrating in ecstasy.
After a moment, she lifts her head, her eyes full of need and want. “I need to feel you inside me, Dylan. Fuck me.”
Well, she doesn’t have to tell me twice.
Hearing those words makes me weak, and my cock is aching for her.
She gets up, and I take off my boxers, tossing them off the bed.
Fawn’s eyes widen when she sees my erection already glistening with pre-cum, and she moistens her lips.
There’s nothing I want more than for her mouth to be around my cock, but I know I’ll come straight away.
Plus, she deserves my cum inside her, not dripping out of that pretty little mouth.
She repositions herself above me. Eagerly, I hold the base of my cock, and she slowly starts to lower herself. Her eyes close, and her mouth opens. She gasps with a mix of pleasure and pain as she takes every inch.
“Fuck, princess,” I breathe, my hands gripping her hips. “You’re so tight. Ugh, I’ve missed you.”
She bottoms out, seated fully on my lap, my cock buried to the hilt inside her. She presses the palms of her hands flat against my stomach to support herself. For a brief moment, we merely breathe, feeling the sensations of our connection.
Then, I thrust into her.
I start off slowly, hips grinding deep. After a moment, I escalate, harder and deeper. I grunt in effort, and I know I’m going to come quickly. It’s been too fucking long since I’ve been inside her.
She yelps when I turn us over quickly, flipping her onto the bed, my body on top of hers.
Her nails dig into my back as I really thrust into her. Missionary sex — it’s loving and possessive. When our eyes connect, I feel the force of it hit me right in the chest.
“I need to come. I’m sorry,” I moan, my control splintering. “Fuck!”
She wraps her legs around my waist, pulling me deeper. Her eyes are wild, loving. “Come for me, Dylan. Fill me up, please,” she begs. “I love you.”
Those three words are what send me over the edge.
I slam into her one last time, letting out a loud moan as my orgasm bursts through me, a pulsing, throbbing deep within her pussy.
Waves of pleasure flood my whole body, crashing through me until my entire body shakes and shudders.
I slump onto her, my face buried in the side of her neck, still deep inside as she continues to squeeze the last drops.
“I love you too, Fawn. I love you so fucking much.”
I don’t want to leave her body. I could stay in her embrace, caught up in the smells of our sex and sweat, temporarily forgetting about the world.
However, I don’t want her to be uncomfortable.
I exhale, a slow, reluctant breath, and pull out; my cock throbs instantly. I turn onto my side to lie next to her, feeling the mattress slope. “Let me get a towel and clean you up, princess.” I begin to hoist myself up.
“No, Dylan.” Her hand shoots out, grabbing my bicep. Her eyes carry a glint of something new. “I want it to drip out of me,” she whispers. “It’s been a while since I’ve had you come inside me.”
Damn, that’s hot — too hot.
My cock jerks a definite, painful throb against my thigh. The image she just painted . . . my cum leaking out of her, marking the sheets, claiming her from the inside . . . Fuck. I feel a possessive growl build in my chest.
Instead of speaking, I motion for her to lift her head, and she does. I slip my arm under her neck, tucking her into the crook of my shoulder as her curly hair strokes my chin.
“I missed you like crazy, Fawn,” I whisper into her hair. The words feel too small for the canyon that opened in my chest when she was gone.
She moves even closer, her lips touching my chest. “I missed you too, Dylan.”
With the other hand, I begin to scratch her back, light strokes along the edge of her spine and up again.
“That’s nice,” she purrs. “I could easily go back to sleep.”
Goosebumps appear on her skin. We lie in a thick, plush silence, the only sounds our breathing.
My mind, though, won’t fully quiet. It drifts through the haze of satisfaction to the other side of those empty thoughts of Torin. Is he okay? He would call if there was a problem, right?
Fawn stirs, her hand sliding from my arm to rest on my chest, right over my heart. “Your heart is beating so fast.”
“Is it?” I try to keep my voice casual. “Just . . . happy you’re here.”
“Mmm.” She doesn’t sound convinced. Her fingers trace idle patterns on my skin. “It feels like you’re thinking too hard.”
I let out a short, soft laugh. “Crap. You caught me.”
“Wanna talk about it?”
No. Yes. Fuck. I don’t know. I scratch her back again, a little firmer this time. “Just thinking about . . . everything.”
“We’ll be okay, right?” she asks.
“Of course we will. If you’re thinking about the video, trust me, no one will see it.”
“I couldn’t give a fuck about myself. It’s you, Torin, and my grandpa I worry about.”
“And that’s why you’re so perfect,” I reply, kissing her head. “Because you’re the least selfish person I know.”
“Dylan?” Her voice is clearer now. She props herself up on one elbow, looking down at me. Her hair tumbles over her shoulder, her eyes searching mine. “Are you okay?”
The question hangs there. It’s curious, and no doubt she wants me to open up about my mom, but I can’t right now.
“I’m fine, I promise. I’m just fucked.” I wink, trying to lighten the mood. “Literally.”
She bites her lip, thinking. “Morning, by the way.”
“Morning, princess. Want some pancakes?”