Chapter 15
Chapter Fifteen
“S o, can you change whenever you want or do you have to wait for a full moon?”
Rafe gave her an amused smile. They were sitting on her back deck; the late afternoon sun was low enough now that the trees at the edge of the woods cast long shadows across the backyard.
Ruby could see the torn-up grass where Rafe had fought the other wolf.
She didn’t let her gaze linger there. The rest of the yard was wild and unmowed.
Black-eyed Susans, purple Asters and Goldenrod she’d never planted waved in the breeze.
Her bare feet hung over the edge of the deck, the wood rough beneath her palms. They’d never bothered to put furniture out here.
“No, that’s a myth. I can change whenever I need to.”
Interesting that he said “need” instead of “want,” like he never changed just for the fun of it, but Ruby didn’t get to delve into that further. It was Rafe’s turn. They’d been trading questions for most of the afternoon.
He studied her for a minute before asking, “I thought you only wore black.”
Ruby peered down at the Maple Hollow Muskrats Girls Volleyball sweatshirt she’d stolen from Lena. It was a deep maroon to match her sweatpants. They’d both taken the time to shower and change, despite Rafe’s reservations about leaving her for even an hour to go get stuff from his house.
She flashed him a smile of her own. “That’s also a myth.”
Rafe laughed, the sound like a roll of thunder in the distance.
It was quickly becoming one of Ruby’s favorite sounds.
It was her turn, but she was running out of general werewolf questions: were there other paranormal creatures out there?
Yes. Full moon required? No. What did he eat?
Mainly hamburgers and Snickers bars, but the occasional rabbit if he felt like hunting.
“What does it feel like to be a wolf?”
Rafe hesitated, thinking, his eyes fixed on the forest beyond the yard.
“Brighter,” he said. “Like all your senses are magnified, but your self-control is weaker too. Like you want to run and run forever. Wild.”
Wild. Ruby’s blood rushed faster through her veins at the idea of running wild. What would it be like to leave it all behind? Her job, her sister, her bills?… and just run. She breathed in the fantasy together with the wildflower-scented air.
They were quiet for a long time before Rafe asked, “Favorite food?” An easy one.
“Chicken Parm.”
“Fancy.”
She could go with another easy one, but she wanted to know more.
She wanted to know everything. Talking to Rafe was easy, even while it was intense.
Like she wanted to unpack all the tangled-up shit inside her and lay it out for him.
Like she already knew he wouldn’t mind. And she wanted him to do the same.
“There are more of you, obviously. But do you have a pack or something? A family?”
Ruby could feel his body tense beside her. He sat the same way she did, with his long legs dangling over the edge of the deck, leaning back on his hands, face tipped toward the late sun. But now he turned to look at her.
“You don’t have to tell me. I was just wondering what happened to them.
” Ruby had been on the other end of this question enough times in her life to know what was going through Rafe’s mind, the calculations being made.
How much should you share? How would the other person react?
No matter how many years went by, she still hadn’t found a good way to tell people about her parents’ deaths. There was no good way.
When Rafe finally spoke, his voice was rough and his gaze was on the tree line as if he could see all the way to his past. “I left a year ago and I haven’t gone back.”
He didn’t elaborate and Ruby didn’t ask. If he wanted to tell her more, he would.
“Does anyone else in your family have episodes like Lena?” he asked, moving his big body so he could look at her.
She wasn’t expecting that one, but she supposed she had it coming after asking about his family. She turned too, crisscrossing her legs in front of her.
There were those times when her aunt’s mind had seemed to leave the room even while her body stayed behind.
But she’d been so old by the time Ruby and Lena had come to live with her.
Wasn’t that just typical for someone her age?
And as she came back to herself, she would ask the girls if they wanted ants on a log for a snack and they would all move on with their day.
A different memory flickered through her, one that had only gotten fuzzier over time.
Had she really dreamed about her parents’ accident before it happened?
She had never been sure, but that couldn’t be what Rafe was talking about.
It wasn’t the same as what was happening to Lena.
Just a strange coincidence. One she hadn’t thought of in years.
She pushed the crazy idea that it mattered now out of her head.
“Uh?… not that I know of. My Aunt Millie was pretty into seances for a while, but I know she was the one pushing the planchette around the Ouija board. She denied it, but I’m sure she was cheating.”
Another low-thunder laugh had Ruby spilling more than she intended.
“She was just trying to cheer me up. After the accident…” Ruby paused. She could leave the story here and never tell Rafe about her parents. Never give him the chance to pity her.
Rafe leaned forward, resting his forearms on his thighs. His hair hung forward, half obscuring his face, but his silver eyes flashed from the shadows. “You don’t have to tell me either. We all have shit in our past that we’d rather forget.”
But that was just it, she didn’t want to forget. She stopped telling people about her parents because it made them uncomfortable, not her. “Our parents died in a car accident when we were eight. We moved here to live with our great-aunt.”
“Ah, that explains the grandma decor.”
Ruby laughed. “Hey.”
“I like it.”
She shook her head. “Anyway, I was sad, of course I was. It was obviously the worst thing that ever happened to me; it still is the worst thing. And I was attacked by a werewolf?… so that’s saying something.”
Rafe’s lips tipped into a smile, his gaze never leaving her face as she spoke.
“But I loved my aunt. She was smart and funny, and she took good care of us. And I had my sister. Lena has always been my best friend. But…”
Ruby shifted, the sun-warmed wood comforting beneath her palms.
“But?” Rafe’s voice was soft, not pushy or demanding, just curious.
“But after it happened, it was all anyone saw when they looked at me. Oh, there’s poor Ruby, the girl who lost her parents.
” She shrugged. “Anyway, my aunt would take out the Ouija board when we got sad. She would say, ‘Let’s call up Mom and Dad and tell them about your day.’ I know that sounds insane and kind of morbid, but it helped.
I still talk to them.” She was rambling, telling this man whom she hardly knew, way too much, but he made her feel so comfortable.
“It doesn’t sound insane at all.”
Ruby smiled.
They sat in silence for a while. As much fun as it was to give Rafe crap about wanting to stick around, she really did like spending time with him.
“So, do you talk to anyone in your family?” she asked, not wanting to let the conversation end.
“My younger brother, sometimes. As little as possible.”
“Why?”
“Why do I talk to him? I ask myself that every time.”
Ruby laughed, turning to face him again. “No, why do you talk to him as little as possible?”
Rafe shrugged. “Because he’s a pain in the ass.”
“Nice to know werewolf families are just like human ones.”
His expression darkened. “In some ways.”
“But not others?”
Rafe stood abruptly. “Don’t you need to get ready for work?”
“Uh?… pretty soon. Rafe, are you?—”
“I left my truck in town last night. I’ll get it and meet you out front in an hour.”
He didn’t even wait for an answer before striding off.
He really didn’t want to talk about his family.