Chapter Six #3
need. Was it selfish? He’d been the one to offer the relationship. Although he
had boundaries. “I know we’re not in the club, Sir.”
He leaned in, and she could feel the heat of his breath on
her ear, the low growl causing arousal to flood her system. “None of that. I
was an idiot. The club is wherever we say it is. I can’t be a proper top if I
ignore you outside a rigid space. Vivian, we don’t have to put limits.”
But she needed them. “D/s only, of course. I won’t bother
you outside of sessions.”
“You bother me every minute of the day,” he growled. “But I
understand I fucked up and I need to show you I can be a safe space. D/s it is,
but if you are in trouble or hurt, I don’t give a bloody damn where we are. You
will call me. I will handle problems like Tarquin. That is my job. Am I
understood? You’re not a newbie. You don’t need training. You don’t need me to
handle your daily life. You’re an intelligent, competent woman. Let me have
responsibility in this one place.”
“Two places,” she corrected. Every word he was saying made
her want to melt. He sounded like he regretted what happened between them when
they met again. “In play spaces and when I have real trouble. What do you get
out of it, Sir?”
Honestly, if he told her he would like for her to handle
some domestic chores for him, she would say yes. It would be more transactional
that way.
“I get to pretend I wasn’t an idiot,” he whispered. “I get
to pretend you really want me.”
His words made her ache inside. “I do want you.”
“Do you know what I regret the most about our first
encounter?” he whispered achingly as his arm wound around her waist, pulling
her closer.
She let her head fall back. “What?”
“That I didn’t kiss you,” he replied. “I want to devour you,
Vivian. I want to eat my fill, and that means I’ll never be done.”
The words shook her. She couldn’t feel this much, couldn’t
allow herself to fall again. This man could rip her up in a way Tarquin never
could. “I can’t. Just D/s. Just sex. No kissing. That’s a hard limit.”
“Only on the lips?” Mal asked, and there was disappointment
there. “Can I use my mouth on you elsewhere?”
Negotiating. She could do that. That felt safe. “You can use
your mouth anywhere but mine. The same for me.”
“I’ll know you’ve forgiven me the day you kiss me,” he said.
“When you kiss me, I’ll know you’re serious.”
She shook her head. “There’s no forgiveness needed, Sir.
I’ve told you what I want. What I need.”
She felt him tense behind her, and for a moment she thought
he might walk away. Instead, he opened the door. “Then we should begin.”
They slipped inside as a group walked down the hall.
“Can you believe Tarquin’s Insta? I didn’t think he liked
cats so much,” one of them said.
“And what’s up with him posting anti-monarchist stuff?”
another asked. “His mother is going to have a heart attack.”
“Whoa. He went on Reddit asking about erectile disfunction
drugs. Is there something we don’t know?”
So Sami was hard at work. At least one of them was having
fun tonight.
Malcolm put a chair under the door, effectively locking it.
Then he found another chair and sat down. “Come here, Vivian.”
Her whole body tensed. The air felt alive around her. If she
had half a brain, she would run. Instead, she moved toward him, placed herself
over his lap and felt him drag her skirt up. She felt his hand run over the
sides of her thong.
“I don’t like this.” He snapped the thong. The sensation
burned slightly. “But I do like this.”
His hand came down on her cheeks, and she gripped his ankle.
“This has nothing to do with discipline and everything to do
with what you need,” he said.
He smacked her ass again and again, no count, no words of
admonition or praise. He slapped her ass and let her cry. She had to be calm
all the time. For her patients. For her coworkers. Only in this place did she
feel like she was free to cry.
She’d been stripped bare and found wanting too often lately.
She had big decisions to make, and they scared her. Her life felt like it was
slipping through cracks she didn’t see before it was too late.
So she cried and let the poison out, let it drip from her eyes and her soul onto the floor of that coat
check room. Mal was there with her. A hard hand that shifted her levers so she
could expel the noxious emotions. So she could let go of the shame and hate and
sorrow.
After a long while, Mal stopped. “I can’t give you more,
lo…sub. Your cheeks are pink, verging on red. I won’t hurt you more than
necessary.”
She took a long, cleansing breath and did a check of her
body. Sometimes she lost track in this space. It could be a dangerous thing if
the Dom wasn’t careful. Her ass ached but in a good way. She felt like she
could breathe again. “It’s fine, Sir. That was exactly what I needed. I feel
better.”
“Am I off the leash?” The question came out of his mouth,
dark and needy.
She wasn’t sure what he meant, and for a moment she thought
about telling him they should go back to the party, but…she didn’t want to. She
was the reliable one. The one who didn’t make mistakes and chose the safe path.
Malcolm Mays wasn’t safe. He was a wounded tiger with the
capability of sliding right back into attack mode.
“Fuck me, Sir. Fuck me hard.”
He had her up and on one of the tables before she could
blink.
His gorgeous face looked down at her. “You are not in charge
of this. I’ll fuck you, sub, but my way. All the way. Lift your hips. I’m not
commanding you to get naked because you need to go back to the party or your
friends will worry. Don’t think I’ll let you keep your clothes next time.”
She did as he asked, and he dragged the thong over her hips
and off her legs. Then he pressed her legs up so her ankles were on the edge of
the table and her pussy was right on the cusp.
He’d meant what he said. He planned to use his mouth on her,
and her whole body felt tense with desire. She was vulnerable, but this time it
was a good thing. This time it heightened her awareness and pleasure.
Vivian nearly screamed with the first long lick of his
tongue. Malcolm Mays was on his knees, his face pressed to her pussy, tongue
delving in. Her fists clenched, and she held in a moan. He lashed her pussy
with his tongue with as much ruthless determination as he’d spanked her ass.
Discipline and pleasure. It was everything she needed. Life suddenly felt out
of control, but this was a space where she didn’t need it.
When she came, it felt like flying.
And then he was on her, shoving his pants down. Somehow
getting a condom on. She wasn’t sure because all she could see was the
desperate need on his face. He wanted her. He needed her.
She tried to turn so he could enter her from behind, but he
stopped, his voice harsh with desire and what sounded like regret.
“Don’t. I won’t kiss you until you let me, but I want to see
you. This isn’t a cold exchange for me. I was a coward, Vivian. You were right.
I was protecting myself. I can’t do that and be your Dom. I can’t…won’t protect
myself from you.” He pushed inside her.
She didn’t want to think about those words. All she wanted
was this wild thing between them.
Vivian held on as he fucked her hard, his cock slamming into
her in the sweetest way. Every thrust felt like something more than sex. It
felt like possession. Like a claiming. She let her hands find the bottom of his
shirt. She wanted to touch him, needed to sink her nails into his skin. She
felt savage.
It was good to be savage. It was good to find this piece of
herself she’d never known existed. She was there. The primal Vivian was there,
but it seemed only Mal could let her out of her cage.
Mal’s cock hit the perfect spot deep inside her, and the
wave from before became a quake. It made her bones shake, and she held him
tight as he came in time with her.
The peace she felt in that moment was so perfect.
But she didn’t kiss him. And she knew it wouldn’t last.