15. Chapter 15
I SIT next to a few strangers but fellow Havoc supporters in the Waves Arena in Miami. Joaquín was able to convince me to join him for a road game. When he said Miami, it didn’t take much more convincing than that.
I’m going to miss these last minute getaways when I finally get a darn job. Might as well enjoy it while I can.
Joaquín has an amazing block and our row goes mad.
“That’s your man, sister!” One woman, Emmy, says from two seats over.
“Sure is!” I hold out my hand and we high five one another.
Joaquín bought me an amazing ticket and while I really did appreciate it, I was stuck –yet again– in the middle of a very pissed off Miami Waves crowd. A group of Havoc fans saw me getting booed while cheering on my own and invited me to come sit with them as they had a friend that wasn’t able to make it. I happily took them up on their offer and we’ve celebrated every check, every steal and every goal.
When you’re a Texan and spot a fellow Texan out in the wild, it’s like spotting a family member. That’s just how we are.
The time on the clock runs out, and me and my new friends celebrate a Havoc win. I say goodbye to them and thank them for their generosity. We exchange socials and wave goodbye, them heading off towards the exit, and me towards the players lot to wait for Joaquín.
The night is warm and a bit muggy, so jackets are definitely not necessary. But, in my opinion, it is not let your hooha and milk jugs hang out weather either. Seems the puck bunnies didn’t get the memo.
Two women clad scantily in what I guess you would call clothing stand just feet behind me. Far enough I don’t have to suffer from the smell of their cheap perfume, but close enough I can hear their conversations.
“When was the last time you saw him?” One asks.
“It’s actually been a while. Last year, I think,” the other replies.
“Does he know you’re here?”
“No. I tried calling him but it went straight to voicemail. I’m hoping that once he sees me, he’ll remember and we’ll fall back to how it is every time he visits.”
Sounds like this girl is a regular and already knows the drill. I pull out my phone and scroll through some text messages. A few from Brooke including one with a picture of her and Jordan on their Pier, and one from my mom. I send a quick reply and return my phone to my pocket and keep my eyes peeled for Joaquín.
I spot him finally stepping through the back door and immediately my heart dances in my chest. His eyes roam the parking lot and when he sees me, a smile lights up his gorgeous face. I bounce on my toes as he swaggers towards me and everything else fades to black. It’s like a cheesy teen flick when the main character walks out and a love song plays while the crowd just seems to disappear.
Yeah. I’m totally feeling that right now.
He’s a foot away when someone steps right between us and throws her arms around his neck.
“Hey. I was hoping you’d remember,” she purrs.
Joaquín looks at me with an utterly shocked face and there is no doubt mine matches. My stomach sours watching another woman with her hands all over him, but I feel some ease seeing the extreme discomfort on his face.
The woman turns her head to kiss him and before I can snatch her ass to the floor by her cheap extensions, Joaquín palms her face and pushes her away.
“What the fuck?” he gripes. “Get off of me. Jesus.”
He grabs her arms from around his neck and drops them by her side once he’s free of her. She watches him with a how dare you look, and he furrows his brows at her and steps around where she stands.
Joaquín tugs me into his arms and drops his bag, grabbing me with both hands. “Hi baby. I missed you.”
“It’s only been hours,” I remind him.
“And that’s far too long.” He grabs the back of my head and kisses me with a passion that is usually reserved for the bedroom.
I moan against his mouth and he slides his hands over my ass. My fingers tangle in his hair that is still wet from his shower, and scrape my nails on his scalp the way he likes. We separate and he stares at me and only me.
“I’m sorry,” he says, a remorseful look on his face.
“No sorry’s. Ghosts in the past.” He shakes his head and blinks his eyes as if he’s trying to ward off tears. “Want to go to the bar?”
“No. I just want to go back to the hotel. I just want to hold you.”
I caress his face and look deep into his dark brown eyes. They look so sad and full of guilt and I know what just happened is really affecting him. I won’t lie, I’m pissed, but I’m confident in our relationship. Our connection is unlike any other and no one could possibly have what we do. I refuse to hold his past over his head like a guillotine that may drop at any moment. Jordan did that enough, I think.
“Okay, Bean. Let’s go. Do you need to check in?” He shakes his head without a word. “Perfect.”
He laces his fingers with mine and reaches down for his bag. He kisses the back of my hand and as we pass the woman who thought he was here for her, he says, “Lose my number because trust me, I’ve lost yours.”
We walk past them and I give her a smug smile, knowing there’s nothing more to be said. I do, however, throw her a wink and flip my hair over my shoulder. Joaquín throws his arm over my shoulder, tucking me into his side, and kisses my head.
Damn , I’d love to look over my shoulder to see whether she saw us or not, but I have a good feeling she did.
I walk out of the bathroom having washed my face and brushed my teeth and find Joaquín laying on the bed, his eyes closed and his jaw clenched tight. His chest rises with deep inhales and exhales, and I can tell that something is bothering him.
I tiptoe quietly over to him and crawl over him. “Open your eyes, Bean. Look at me.”
With hesitation, he opens them and I see the sad boy that once spent an entire week sending me apology letter after apology letter because he pulled a prank that ended with me busting my chin and needing stitches. I told him then and I guess I’ll have to tell him now.
“It’s okay. You need to stop punishing yourself because I’m not holding anything against you.”
“How many more times is this going to happen and you’re just going to step over it and say it’s okay? Jolie. This is fucked up. I’m fucked up, and I don’t know why you want me. Jordan was right. I’m not good enough for you.”
He tries to push up and I put all of my weight on him and force him back down on the mattress.
“Hey. Don’t you talk about the man I love like that. He’s amazing and funny and thoughtful and treats me like a queen. He deserves me and I deserve him and our life started the day he kissed me. Everything before that doesn’t matter.” I let my hands smooth over his chest and try to ease his worried mind.
He watches me but doesn’t say a word. A troubled sea lies behind his eyes and I can tell my reassurances just aren’t doing what I intend them to do. So instead of using my words, I use my touch to tell him how I feel about him.
My lips kiss up his neck and along his jaw and softly nip at his plump lips. I roll my hips, my satin pajamas already growing wet, and feel his cock start to stiffen. He rubs my back and I press my chest up against his, my nipples aching. Just when I think things are about to heat up, he stills me and pries his lips from mine.
“Can I just hold you? I really want to lay with you in my arms and feel you breathe.” His voice is low and almost wounded.
“Yeah. Of course. Whatever you want, honey.”
He pushes to sit and I climb off of him. I watch him undress down to just his boxers, then he pulls back the covers and we crawl inside. His strong arm wraps around my waist and pulls me to cuddle into him. I feel his nose burrow into my hair and hear him inhale.
“I love you, Bunny,” he whispers against my neck.
“I love you too, Bean.” His lips lay a soft kiss on my shoulder and his hold on me tightens.
I spend half of the night, locked in his arms and wide awake, wondering how to get him to see himself the way I do.
Brooke and I share a laugh while we wait for the guys to walk out of the arena. Today’s game was an afternoon one, so we told the guys we were going back to their place to clean up and would meet them back here for a rare night out.
I should really quit calling it the guys place. While I haven’t officially moved everything in, my clothes have their own side of the closet and I have my very own sink and cabinet in the master bathroom. I guess I’m just having a difficult time calling it my place since I don’t pay a penny to live there. I cook and clean and contribute what I can, but monetarily I bring nothing to the table.
“So you think heading north to that restaurant in Magnolia Creek will draw less crowd for Joaquín?” Brooke asks.
“I hope so. I mean, I’m sure there will be a few fans no matter where we go, but staying downtown with all the bars ensures we’ll be mobbed.”
Just then we hear deep laughter rumble across the parking lot and look up to find Jordan and Joaquín walking towards us. They both look at us and I’m not sure if Jordan smiles at Brooke, but Joaquín smiles and it lights up the early evening as the dark begins to set in.
I’m hauled into his arms and he kisses me like my brother isn’t standing just a foot away. My brother who groans in complaint, but it doesn’t stop us from getting lost in each other.
When we finally pull apart, my eyes stay closed as the lingering effects of his kiss pump through me and he whispers, “Hey Bunny. I missed you.”
The fact that he says he misses me after just hours apart is now his thing. No matter if I go to the grocery store or if he goes to another state. When we reconnect it’s always, “I missed you” .
“Hi Bean. Missed you, too. Ready to go?”
“Yes. I’m starving.” He takes my hand and leads me to his car, and Jordan escorts Brooke to his since there is no way we are all fitting in the Targa, and follow each other up to the restaurant.
When we pull up into the parking lot, Joaquín looks at me with a skeptical brow and says, “Get Forked? Really Jo?”
“Just hush. You’ll like it. I’ve read really good reviews and it seems like it’s not too crowded, so it’s perfect.”
We park and walk inside and Jordan and Brooke join us just minutes later. We’re escorted to our table and start browsing the menu.
“Oh my gosh. I need a Cherry’s Pie of Jubilee,” Brooke swoons, licking her lips with wide eyes.
“Are you serious with the names of these dishes?” Jordan’s eyes scan the pages rapidly.
“I think they’re fun. And does it really matter what it’s called so long as it’s good?” I ask him.
“She’s got you there, Jo. I mean, I’ll eat someone’s cream pie all day if it’s good enough,” Joaquín jokes and we all laugh.
Our waitress steps up to the table and greets us. “Hello. I’m Karina and I’ll be–Joaquín! Oh my gosh. How are you?”
The waitresses' eyes look like sparklers on the fourth of July. Meanwhile, Joaquín looks pale and like he might be sick.
“Hey,” he says.
“I have been meaning to call you. I’m sorry I was busy the last time you called. Work and school have been nuts. But I’m free tonight after my shift if you’re not busy. Is Jaime free? Maybe he can meet us.”
She rattles on not even worrying about the rest of us as we sit there, listening to her talk with barely any breath in between.
I watch Joaquín turn from pale to yellow the longer she talks. “Karina. This is my girlfriend. Jolie.” He reaches over and takes my hand. “I don’t want this to sound rude, but is it possible to get a different server?”
Her big smile starts to shrink and her eyes turn vacant as she looks at me, then our hands, and up to Joaquín.
“Oh. Okay. Sure. I’ll get someone for you right away. Enjoy your evening.” She gives us all a tight smile and stomps away, weaving in and out of the tables.
I truly try not to let these run-ins bother me, and normally I can laugh at them. But this girl acted as if they talked days ago. I know that isn’t so, but still…that one kind of hurt.
“I need to use the restroom. Will you order me a sparkling water?”
“Babe. I’m–”
“It’s okay,” I tell him, leaning over and kissing his cheek. “I’ll be right back.”
“I’ll come with you,” Brooke says, jumping up from her seat. “I’d like a sparkling water, too. Thanks Jordan.”
I look at my brother and his face looks like it has a mild sunburn. Red, but not to the point of boiling.
Brooke hooks her arm in the crook of my elbow and leans her head against my shoulder. “You okay, Jo?”
I look at her, those big blue eyes staring up at me, and tell her, “Yeah. I trust him. It’s just a little hard to hear some of that. You know?”
She gives me a sad smile and nods. The rest of the evening is a little tense as we eat in partial silence and when we drive home, Joaquín holds my hand but doesn’t say a word.
In fact, he doesn’t say many words over the next few days.