Chapter 29 – Cody
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Cody
Shay agreed to take a pregnancy test. She can’t deny the chances anymore.
I don’t know why she feels so hesitant to bring a child into the world when Caleb is a delight to be around and the greatest stepson that anybody could hope for.
I love the little guy and I love the idea of giving him a baby brother or sister even more.
I hope I didn’t make a mistake trusting the fate of Shay’s invasive ex-husband to Grayson, but I figure family business doesn’t have to involve the entire club.
As long as he gets the guy over to a place that’s ours where we can find out what he knows and make sure he doesn’t come back… We might not need to kill him.
Grayson will call if he has any problems. No news is good news.
In the lead up to the pregnancy test, I’ve spent every waking moment catering to Shay, kissing and teasing her like the first night I put the plug in her ass. She might not be as sensitive as she was the first day I lodged the bulb in her back door, but I have definitely gained her obedience.
Shay likes gardening but never had her own space for it.
I have some ideas about landscaping and plenty of firsthand knowledge about soil, what types of plants might grow around here and all of that.
After the baby, I want us to go back to the ranch full time, but I don’t mind setting roots out here for now.
I suspect it’s the gardening, the butt plug, or helping her out in the kitchen that has Shay swayed by the pregnancy test. Also, she hasn’t had her period since she came here. She wouldn’t have been able to hide it from me.
Kylie struggled to forgive me for putting her close to Grayson for a while.
She doesn’t like acknowledging the things our father did outside of the marriage and she’s the first to call Grayson her half-brother.
Now that she’s eased off, I can get her to put Caleb down for the night so Shay and I can take the pregnancy test together and make a moment out of it.
Shay doesn’t want to make it a moment, but maybe it’s easy for her to stay calm because she already has a son.
I love Caleb, but having a child of my own was something that I never thought would happen for me.
I spent most of my adult life on the ranch or hanging around the biker club.
Unless I planned on ending up with a woman like Tylee, or worse, I didn’t see a family in my future.
I take Shay into our master bathroom suite once Kylie assures us we are “good to go” for the night. Caleb listens to Kylie in a way that makes me think she’s magic.
“You didn’t have to get four pregnancy tests,” Shay says. “It’s not necessary.”
“I don’t know how it works.”
“That doesn’t inspire confidence.”
She grabs the pink test. I wonder if there’s a reason for it, but I’m too scared to ask Shay any questions. She seems snappy – and it’s not just the butt plug. Her eyes flicker to mine angrily. I somehow made a mistake despite saying nothing at all.
“You can wait outside the door.”
“I can’t watch you piss?”
“No,” Shay says. She looks appalled that I would ask. “Go wait outside or I will drown all of these in the bathtub.”
I don’t know why she goes straight to threats. I slink out of the bathroom door and shut it behind me, pressing my ear to the door until Shay keeps clearing her throat. After the seventh time, I get the message and take a few steps back.
She doesn’t come out of the bathroom until several minutes later. Shay opens the door and I can’t tell what the results are from the look on her face.
“Did you find out?”
“I covered it,” she says. “I thought we could find out together.”
I’ve been on thin ice with her lately — although maybe she would be grateful if she knew the lengths I am going to keeping her ex-husband away from her — so I’m surprised but grateful that she wants to show me the results of the pregnancy test.
Before she changes her mind, I follow Shay into the bathroom. She has the results covered by a white towel. I stand behind her, looking over her shoulder nervously.
“What do you think?”
“I think we both know,” Shay says. That doesn’t stop my emotions from running totally wild and out of control. She removes the towel and I see two thick pink lines. Shay’s lashes flutter, but other than that, I don’t see any intense reaction from her.
“Pregnant,” she says.
I can’t stop myself. I hug her. I hold her so tightly that she grunts and I loosen my grip a little bit.
I’m excited. Pure excitement. I kiss her, and Shay kisses me back, even if she seems surprised by my reaction.
This is really going to happen for us. I didn’t think I was the type of man to end up with love and a family, but Shay gave me new hope.
She looks at me with confusion when I can finally bring myself to stop kissing her.
“You seem very happy.”
“Aren’t you?”
“It didn’t hit me the first time until I could feel the kicks,” Shay says, offering me the lightest smile. “But I loved being pregnant. I was one of those weird people.”
“Hm,” I murmur. “But you’re not angry?”
“No. I’m… surprised that you seem so happy.”
“I want all of it, Shay. Dirty diapers. Late nights. I gave up on being a dad a long time ago. I don’t have the type of… I… I’ve never had a woman agree to stay.”
She drops her gaze and I hate that I feel like it’s a personal rejection. My possessiveness over her grows already.
“Children are forever, Cody.”
“I know that. It’s what I want.”
“I’ve heard that before.”
“You don’t think I’ll leave you,” I say to Shay calmly. There’s no way she believes that. Not after everything I’ve done to keep her here.
“No,” she says. “But I don’t ever want to be your slave, Cody.”
“Fuck, Shay. I would never think of you like that.”
She glances down nervously at her thigh, currently covered up by clothing but also tattooed with a large design containing the words “Property of Indian”.
“You are not my slave,” I counter firmly. “You are precious to me — and part of my club’s traditions involve rituals to keep you safe. You are not less than me in any way, Shay Hollingsworth. I hope you know that.”
“I do,” she says. “But do you?”
“Yes,” I whisper back to her, holding her close in another hug. “I want you to be the mother of my children. You aren’t just equal to me, Shay. You’re the most important person in this house.”
“After Caleb,” Shay murmurs.
“After Caleb,” I whisper back. “I hope when he’s older, he knows that he’s my son too…”
Shay kisses me. She’s been doing that more lately. It’s not the same as hearing her confess her feelings, but it’s better than nothing and feels so good.
“I’m scared, Cody,” she confesses after settling back onto her feet.
“Of what?”
“I don’t want to make another mistake. I never wanted to be that person who had all these baby daddies and?—”
I press my finger to her lips. “Enough. I’m not going anywhere, Shay. I’ll prove it to you. I’ll be a good dad. I know what you saw shook you up… But I’m not a monster. I swear it.”
She wants to speak, so I drop my finger, even if my heart pounds out of control with worry about what she might say. She trembles and I can feel her about to say something when my fucking phone rings. You have got to be kidding me.
I try to ignore it. Shay urges me to pick it up. We go back and forth a couple more times, I quickly check my phone screen.
“It’s Grayson.”
I have to pick it up. I answer, downright livid that he interrupted this moment, but concerned that he’s only calling because there’s a problem.
“Cody,” he says. “I got myself in some shit, I’ll be honest.”