Chapter 21 #2
But I can’t carry his burdens anymore or try to fill Mom’s shoes to make him happy.
Because that’s what I’ve done since Mom died: picked the easy path that didn’t ruffle Dad’s feathers or destroy his expectations. I made his life easy at the expense of my happiness.
That’s not fair to either of us. It kept me small and allowed him to wallow in his grief.
That’s not how I want to live my life.
Landon’s phone buzzes. His forehead scrunches when he looks at the number.
“Who is it?” I ask.
“I don’t recognize it. Unknown caller.” He shows me the screen, then declines the call.
“Have you eaten?” Kelsey asks.
“No.”
Landon’s phone rings again. Same number.
“Answer it. It might be important.”
“If it were important, they would have left a voicemail.” He declines the call again.
“So food? Want me to run and get something, or do you need a break from overwatch?” Kelsey asks.
Landon’s phone rings again. Same number.
“Must be important. Go.” I gently shove him away.
“Are you sure?”
“Get it over with.”
He kisses me hard and Kelsey shrieks with delight.
When he’s on the other side of the room with his phone call, Kelsey shakes my arm. “See? I told you so. Romance looks good on you. Tell me everything.”
The brothers back away, toward the door. “We don’t need details,” Collin says. “We just wanted to make sure everything was settled before we left. If the renovation is off, I need to cancel orders and figure out what to do with my crew.”
I pass out more hugs. “No matter what Dad or the council says, we’re renovating the house. We’ll fight for permits if we need to.”
Landon’s scowl is even deeper when he hangs up the phone. “Lucky wants me to meet her at the house.”
“Why?”
“She didn’t say.”
“Want us to go with you?” Archer asks.
“Would you mind?”
“I wouldn’t offer if we did.”
“I should stay,” Landon says to me.
“Deal with Lucky before she weasels her way into something we can’t undo.” I tug his lapels closed and place a quick kiss on his lips.
He rests his forehead against mine. “She can wait.”
“Lucky Reynolds doesn’t wait for anything. She’s been mayor, what, three hours and she’s already summoning you? She’s up to something.” I link arms with Kelsey and Emberly. “We’re good. Go.”
“Love you.” Landon kisses the side of my head. “See you tonight.”
“You promised dinner.”
“Want me to bring it here?”
“Text when you’re done with Lucky and we’ll decide.”
He nods and buttons his coat. Every eye in the building watches the three men stride from the room.
Who can blame them? Their magnetism is undeniable.
Kelsey presses the back of her hand to her forehead. “Can you get pregnant watching handsome men in their element? The masculinity pouring off of them is—yeesh. I’m jealous.” She drags me into a seat in the corner. “I’m going to gloat about this forever. Em, I told you they’d be amazing together.”
“He can still break her heart.”
“That man looked at her the way you look at your Glock. He’s not breaking anything except the sound barrier with how fast he’s going to put a ring on her finger. He loves her.”
I cover Kelsey’s mouth. “Whoa, whoa, whoa. We are not talking wedding bells.”
Kelsey’s arm shoots into the air. “I call dibs on maid of honor.”
“The dresses need to be pink.” Emberly scowls at me. “That’s the only color I’ll wear.”
Kelsey’s mouth drops open. “Not black?”
“You and I both look best in pink. Preferably a subtle rose color.”
“We aren’t getting married,” I say.
“I tell you this with all the love, but you are. Stop denying it.” Kelsey clasps her hands under her chin. “Beautiful babies.”
“Your hopeless romantic heart is running away with itself.” I drag Kelsey back to a chair. The farfetched fantasy takes hold. Waking up in Landon’s arms every morning. Building a life and maybe a family.
Rational thought screams, Too soon.
Emberley takes the seat the other side of me and searches wedding gowns on Pinterest. I can’t help but imagine walking down the aisle in one of them. Lace sweeping across the bodice. An honest-to-God princess dress like a fairy godmother would magic into existence, a tiara on my head.
Kelsey leans over me. “Em, have you ever seen her act like this?”
“This? Daydreaming about the impossible?” I try to peel her off my lap, but she’s locked in on Emberly.
Emberly ticks items off her fingers. “Confident, self-assured, decisive. You’re going after what you want for the first time in your life, and we are proud of you.”
Kelsey wraps her arms around me and sways back and forth with childlike enthusiasm. “Who you are with Landon is who you were meant to be. It’s like he’s shining a spotlight on the parts of you that were tucked away for safekeeping. You’re safe with him.”
“I am, but that doesn’t mean either of us are ready for a commitment. We slept together one time.”
Kelsey flicks her hand dismissing my rebuttal. “Sex is great, but it’s the whipped cream on the apple pie of love. When it’s great, it’s the best, but it’s not why you’re in the relationship.”
“He’s not pie. We’re not pie,” I stammer.
Emberley smirks. “Kels loves her food metaphors. Don’t try to stop her.”
I bury my face in my hands. “You are crazy.”
Emberly rubs my back. “Your dad will come around when he sees how happy you are.”
Kelsey makes gagging noises. “Can we please not talk about sex and her dad in the same conversation? I was enjoying my whipped cream analogies over here.”
“Dad won’t ever give me his blessing.” I sink lower in my chair.
I want my dad’s blessing, but I don’t need his approval.
“He’s stuck in the past and doesn’t want to move on.
I can’t force him to let go of his grief any more than he can force me to give up Landon.
Dad wants me to fill the void my mom left, but that’s not my job.
It never should have been in the first place. ”
Em adds her arms around Kelsey and me. “He needs counseling.”
“He won’t go. Just like he won’t give up butter and bacon.”
Silence settles over us. My mind wanders through memories of my relationship with my dad. He and I need to talk about his expectations of me, why he can’t let me live my life without him telling me who to be and how to act.
I tried to be the kind of woman who’s comfortable standing behind someone else, but that’s not where I belong. I have too many ideas and opinions not to share them.
Dad needs to realize I’m my own person.
Kelsey nibbles on the end of a curl. “I noticed you didn’t tell Landon you love him when he left.”
I cover my mouth with my hand. “Oh, no. I didn’t. He said it then Dad had his episode and then…he must think I don’t love him.”
“Dinner. Tonight. Stop and grab a pie on your way home.” Kelsey wiggles her eyebrows.
Laughter bursts from my chest. “I’ll never look at apple pie the same way.”
“You’re welcome.”