Chapter 28 #2
I didn’t know many vampires, but I probably knew more than your average girl.
I had never seen one cry—until now. This beautiful blonde that I literally wanted to hold under water until all the little bubbles escaped her mouth, maybe a little longer for good measure, was crying.
She did love him. She still couldn’t have him.
He was mine, and I don’t like to share either.
I walked to the front door and opened it. “You heard him. Get the fuck out of my house. Now. You too, Ronan. You will be getting a phone call from someone at work.”
Ronan and Amelia walked through the doorway, and I slammed the door behind them.
I turned around and looked at Maddox. I was furious at everyone.
He just stared at me. I turned and walked up the stairs.
I wanted to change my clothes, and I was severely agitated.
I could feel Maddox right behind me. In my room, the only illumination came from the bathroom and its open door.
I opened my dresser drawers and got out fresh PJs and underwear, tossing them onto the bed. I turned to Maddox.
“Well, you had something to say to them. What the hell do you have to say to me?” He didn’t say anything—he just stood there. “If you want to follow her, there is the door. Get out! It’s not too late, go after her.” I walked over and stared at him. “Get out!” I swung, and he caught my wrist.
“Do you want me to leave?”
“Finally, you open your mouth. Do I want you to leave? I want you to do what the fuck you want to do. Not what I want you to do—not what that bitch wants you to do. I WANT YOU TO DO WHAT YOU WANT TO DO!” I twisted my arm, and he let go of me.
I picked up my clothes and went into the bathroom. “Fuck everybody.”
I slammed the bathroom door and switched on the radio that sat on the counter. I turned on the shower and adjusted the water. I grabbed the robe off the back of the door and lay down on the rug. At that point, I broke.
Why didn’t I stay away from him? I knew he was the unsafe choice.
If Grandpa were here, he would have warned me.
She was his maker. He probably doesn’t want me to fire him.
Why did I let myself fall? The tears just kept coming, I could feel the anxiety snowballing, and I needed to ground myself before I totally imploded.
My chest felt as though it was caving in on itself.
I was shaking. I was sobbing, and I couldn’t catch my breath.
I was alone on the bathroom floor, crying over a man I knew not to fall in love with. I had no one; Grandpa was gone, Charlotte, my mom—I couldn’t talk to my mom about any of this. It felt like the whole world was closing in on me.
I pulled myself off the floor and got into the shower.
I needed the hot water to help clear my head.
He never told me that he was with Amelia after the bond had been broken.
Why didn’t he tell me that? I felt bad for him too.
If he really was trying to move on from her after so long, then she just shows up and does everything she can to pull him back in.
No matter how badly I want him, I’m not going to be a fool. Even for him.
I started to feel a little stronger. My brain was giving me a pep talk and trying to drown out the screaming from my heart. I turned off the water and got out. The roughness of the towel as I dragged it across my skin began to ground me and clear my head.
I slid into my underwear and shorts and pulled the tee over my head.
Grabbing the brush off the counter, I brushed the tangles from my hair and scrubbed my teeth.
Staring at my reflection in the mirror, it was obvious that I was crying.
Either Maddox actually left, or he couldn’t hear me sobbing over the radio. Or he didn’t care.
A tear ran down my cheek and hit my shirt, leaving a tiny wet spot. I felt like an idiot. I wiped my eyes and hung my towel up on the back of the door. I gathered my dirty clothes and tossed them into the hamper next to the door. Finally, I walked over and turned off the radio.
I stood in front of the door, trying to listen.
I wondered if he was still out there or if he left too.
I didn’t want him to be out there if he wasn’t going to stay.
Then I would be able to climb into my bed and just fall apart.
I didn’t want to have to try to hold it together while he told me that he was in love with her and leaving.
I took a deep breath, turned the door handle, and pulled the door open.
My room was dark, but I never turned the lights on before I went into the bathroom.
I flipped the switch in the bathroom, making everything completely dark.
If he was still in my room, I didn’t want him to know I was crying.
I didn’t want him to see me. I stepped into my room and walked toward my bed.
He was still there; I could feel his presence.
I felt my heart jump at the thought of him still being there.
As I approached the bed, I felt his hand grab mine and pull me to him. I could feel his breath on my face.
“You have every right to be angry—at everyone and everything. I never wanted to ever be the reason for your tears. It’s killing me that I caused this pain.
” He placed the palm of his hand on my cheek.
“I was with her when she was first released. She was an old habit, and those can be hard to quit. I thought I needed to be with her to prove that I could walk away and that she didn’t have any control over me anymore.
Afterwards, I quietly put space between us, and I knew I was done, but I never told her that until tonight.
” He was speaking softly, bearing his soul in the darkness.
Sometimes bringing things to light isn’t the best way.
“You are not the reason I am done with her. She is the reason. I try not to hate her because that takes up space in my head. I pity her. It’s easier.
I am so sorry that the entire situation happened.
I meant every word I said though. I didn’t speak to you right away because you had the right to live in that anger for a while, and I wasn’t going to make anything better by talking you down.
So, I gave you space, but an hour is going to be about all I can manage.
You’re mad at me, and I am not okay with that.
If you need to beat my ass to make you feel better, you can do that.
I’m pretty sturdy.” He laughed, trying to get me to react.
He was looking for any sign of forgiveness.
I couldn’t see his face, but I could hear it in his voice.
“I don’t want to hurt you. I think you have been hurt enough already. But I don’t want you to hurt me either.” I couldn’t lie to anyone—especially him.
He held my face between his hands. “Baby, that is the last thing I want to do.” He kissed my lips softly. I felt his thumb brush across my cheek. “You’re still crying,” he said, with concern in his voice. I hadn’t even realized I had started crying again.
“Kiss me again,” I said.
He pressed his lips to mine again.
“Mmm. Now tell me, was that a goodbye or a hello?” I held my eyes shut and waited for him to answer. He began to pepper my face with kisses.
“A million times hello,” he said right before he sealed his mouth to mine.
I put my hands on his waist as he started backing me toward the bed.
When we reached our destination, he sat.
I climbed onto his lap, straddling him. I wasn’t letting his lips leave mine.
Our hands swapped places as I held his face to mine.
The moonlight coming through the window fell directly onto the bed; bathing everything in a blue glow.
He wrapped his arms around me and cradled my head.
I leaned back slightly, freeing his lips.
He trailed down my chin to my neck, kissing the sensitive skin there.
I both heard and felt him inhaling my scent.
He buried his head between my breasts and inhaled deeply through his nose. The act of it was intensely attractive.
“I’m burning your scent into my brain. This is all I want to smell for the rest of my life.
It’s intoxicating, and I know that if something ever did tear us apart, I could be somewhere a million years from now and if this scent hit my nose, I would recognize it immediately.
I would inhale so deeply, and my soul would ignite, and my heart would calm, because it would be home.
” He looked up at me as he finished speaking, and I just stared at him for a few seconds.
I leaned forward as I guided his lips back to mine.
Reaching down, I grabbed the edge of his tee and pulled it up over his head.
We separated our lips long enough for the shirt to slip by.
I sat back slightly and took in the sight of his very defined, very hard chest. I slowly ran my hand down the center of his chest all the way to his stomach.
“You really are a feast for the eyes. I get incredibly hungry just looking at you; let alone touching you. It doesn’t help that every time I think of you, it’s accompanied by a pulsing between my legs.”
“I can scratch that itch.” Shit was like magic. I was wet and ready with one sentence and a cock-eyed grin. I smiled back at him.
“She can’t have you. You’re mine.”
I pressed my lips to his and opened my mouth, and Maddox followed suit. I brought my legs from beside him to around him as I wrapped my arms around his neck. I felt his arms tighten around me; holding me as close as he possibly could.
“All yours,” he whispered as he stood and turned around.
He laid me on the bed and brought his body down on top of mine.
I pulled him to me and opened my legs to create space for him.
He pulled my shirt over my head and then gently pushed me back down.
Grabbing the waistband of my shorts and underwear, he pulled them from my body.
Tossing them to the side, he hooked his thumbs into his own waistband; yanked his clothing down and stepped out.
I licked my lips and slowly opened my legs.
He accepted the invitation by slowly approaching me, letting his strong rough hands slide up my legs as he slowly brought his body down onto mine. I felt his breath on my ear.
“I am going to make love to you. For the rest of the night, I am going to kiss every square inch of your beautiful body and not take any of it for granted. I plan to watch you come undone and I am going to love and appreciate every moment of it. You’re mine as much as I am yours.”
We spent the rest of the night exploring and worshipping each other’s bodies without any inhibitions or interruptions.
Maddox got up and closed the curtains just as the sun was beginning to rise.
He lay down and I threw a leg over him while I laid my head on his chest. His large hand rested on my ass.
We both fell asleep and didn’t wake up until late in the afternoon.