Chapter 6
Chapter Six
‘A wine bar. Right next door, run by the worst possible person,’ I wailed down the phone to Flick the next morning as I sat in front of my ancient laptop waiting for my accounting software to load. ‘Can you imagine? What a nightmare.’
I heard her moving out of the noisy newsroom and into the relative peace of the corridor.
‘It might be quite fun to have a boozer on your doorstep, so to speak,’ she said, attempting to make me look on the bright side. ‘Didn’t you say the other day it would be nice to have someone use the mooring just along from you? Have a new neighbour?’
‘I meant a quiet neighbour. Preferably someone who enjoyed reading and spent all their money on my stock. Not another business, and definitely not a business run by an uptight prick who mansplains stupid ancient Greek phrases to me. Plus, what kind of fool is irresponsible enough to open a wine bar on water?’ I was warming to my theme as Flick patiently listened.
‘It’ll be full of drunks who will inevitably end up in the canal and then I’ll have to save them because I doubt Mr Jack Siddall will be wanting to jump in the water what with his taste in show-off deck shoes and silly linen trousers.
I mean, who wears linen trousers on a canal boat?
You’d only have to breathe to get muddy water on them. ’
‘Hero bookseller jumps in canal to save drowning drunk.’ Flick sounded like a news anchor delivering the top headline on News at Ten. ‘Now that would be a good story.’
‘It would be awful,’ I emphasised.
‘Sorry, I should rephrase that. I mean it would be a strong news story. But obviously it would be a terrible thing to happen,’ she said hastily. ‘I’m sure it won’t.’
‘It’ll be happening every other night,’ I muttered darkly.
‘You don’t know that,’ said Flick. ‘He’ll have had to come up with reams of health and safety procedures as part of the conditions of opening the place up, you know that.’
‘You can bet I’ll be checking up on that,’ I said.
‘Although from my googling, he’s from some Succession style banking dynasty and is absolutely dripping in money and privilege, so I wouldn’t be surprised if he’s paid his way to ignore the inconvenient stuff while he indulges in his new hobby trying to prove himself to daddy. ’
‘You make him sound like he’s going to be the local mafioso,’ said Flick. ‘The Gazette could do with some scandal like that to entice the readers back. Promise me you’ll send any juicy corruption stories involving him my way.’
‘Believe me, I will,’ I said, even though I knew she was joking.
‘Look, I’m sure there’s nothing to worry about. And if this Jack character is as into linen and fancy deck shoes as you suggest he is, he’ll probably be running a super sophisticated and classy joint. You never know, it might attract a whole new clientele to your bookshop.’
I drew in a breath. ‘Are you suggesting that I don’t attract sophisticated and classy customers to my bookshop already?’ I said in mock offence.
‘Absolutely not. The bookshop is a beacon for every right-thinking person,’ said Flick. ‘Can you elaborate on why he’s an uptight prick, out of interest? Aside from the ancient Greek thing, which while annoying, sounds pretty standard Oxford brainiac interaction to me.’
‘I don’t think that he’s an uptight prick; I know that he’s one. He’s possibly the rudest man I’ve ever had the misfortune to encounter.’
‘Wow, don’t hold back. I’m not sure I’ve ever heard you badmouth another human being to this extent. Who are you and what did you do with my best friend?’ she teased. ‘Okay, hit me with it. What else has he done that’s made you so prejudiced against him?’
‘Where to start? He insulted Hilda for one thing. He called her a horse.’
I had to hold the phone away from my ear as Flick’s distinctive cackle rang out.
‘You regularly make jokes threatening to harness her up to tow the Bookship if the engine ever fails,’ she pointed out once she’d finally stopped laughing.
‘I’m her hu-mum. I’m allowed to make comments like that. Other people aren’t. Especially not other people who say they prefer the film to the book.’
Flick tutted. ‘Why didn’t you open up with that?
The perpetrator of such a heinous crime should never be permitted to move next door to a bookshop.
Hold on a second, let me go to my editor and tell him we need to change the front page and expose this dreadful individual for his crimes against civilisation. ’
‘Before you continue taking the piss, I haven’t got on to the biggest issue. He was incredibly rude about the event, and he spent the whole time acting like he wished he was anywhere else. I mean, nobody held a gun to his head and made him attend.’
‘That’s unfortunate, but perhaps he was nervous? A dating event is a very high-emotion kind of do,’ pointed out Flick.
‘I promise you there were no nerves in attendance. He was an incredible snob. Which is surprising when I tell you this next thing. Guess what he’s going to call the bar?’
‘Now why would I do that and spoil your fun of telling me?’ said Flick patiently.
‘He’s naming it the Jericho Wine Barge. I mean, honestly, what is the bloke thinking?’ I relieved my anger by one-handedly plumping up a cushion with unnecessary force.
‘What’s wrong with that?’ asked my much more fair-minded friend.
‘Seriously? He’s totally lowering the tone of the canal with his silly pun,’ I said pettily.
‘Says the woman whose floating business is called the Oxford Bookship.’ Flick couldn’t keep the amusement out of her voice.
I flumped back against the cushions of my galley bench-cum-bed and picked angrily at a loose thread on the fabric.
‘Fine. I’ll concede that you make a decent point there. Why do you have to be so reasonable about it all?’
‘Because I’m not the one he’s moving next door to, so I have a degree of emotional separation from the problem.
I get why you’re feeling unsettled by the arrival of another business, but change isn’t always bad.
After all, you made a huge change last year by opening the Bookship, and honestly, lovely, you’ve been glowing ever since. ’
I was glad she still believed that to be the case. I felt as far from glowing as it was possible to be right about now.
‘Hmm,’ I responded dubiously. ‘That was change that I chose. It’s not really the same thing. And I don’t feel unsettled by another business coming on the scene. I would just prefer not to have a party boat move in next door.’
‘I’m sure it won’t be as bad as you fear. And maybe his use of puns indicates that beneath the awkward posh boy exterior he’s a kindred spirit?’ she pressed. ‘Perhaps you’ll enjoy having some fresh company on the towpath?’
‘I have plenty of friends on the towpath. I don’t need new ones,’ I said.
‘It’s not possible to have too many friends. Or too much money for that matter.’
The conversation was straying into dangerous territory. Time to turn the tables.
‘Speaking of new friends, where did you and Liam disappear off to? Quick work, Ms Summers, quick work.’
‘Nothing of that sort happened,’ said Flick sounding regretful. ‘Liam merely suggested we go somewhere for a drink, so I took him to the Boaters’ Ale House. Thought he might as well be introduced to the local while he’s moored up on the stream.’
‘How very self-sacrificing of you,’ I said. ‘And?’
‘And what? We had a drink, and they had a two-for-one pizza deal on, so we stayed for some food as well.’
I laughed. ‘Purely because it was on special offer, or was it really because you fancied the pants off him?’
‘A lady never tells. And yes, I know you’re about to say something along the lines of “Good thing you’re not a lady”,’ she said, getting in there first.
‘You know me too well.’ My laptop chirruped, indicating my accounting software had finally opened. ‘You’ll tell me eventually. I know you journos can’t resist gossiping. But I shall content myself with the fact that you sound happy.’
‘Put it this way, it’s very early days, but so far, I would say that your matchmaking skills are pretty on point.
As you’ll see from Liam’s video whenever it drops.
Yup, he’s very persuasive and I even consented to a brief appearance in it.
’ She really was into him then. ‘Right, the boss is giving me evils, so I’ll love you and leave you.
I don’t want him to change his mind about using my feature on your do in the Saturday supplement tomorrow.
Let me know when the next one is planned for, and I’ll make sure the details are included at the bottom of the article so people can book on for it. ’
‘You’re the best pal a girl could wish for,’ I said, although the fate of future Blind Date with a Book nights very much depended on what I was about to see in my accounts. ‘Speak later.’
‘See you.’
I stared at the figures on the screen and forced myself to focus on the positive.
If I didn’t take into account the wages I should have paid myself for running the event but hadn’t, then I had actually made a respectable-ish profit for once.
I mean, it would hardly put a dent in the figure I needed to raise to pay the mooring fees, but it was a start, and it indicated that it was worth holding the event again.
Before I could change my mind, I texted Flick a date for the next one.
At least I felt I was taking control of my situation, rather than sitting back and hoping for a miracle to occur.