Chapter 25
Shane
It took three days of rest and regular feedings from Bal and Sor before I had enough energy to get out of bed.
For the first day after the attack, if Bal wasn’t by my side, then Sor was.
Bal hadn’t said much. I’d expected questions about what had happened, but he hadn’t asked anything.
I wasn’t fooled. No matter the gentleness of his touch when he fed me, or the soft kisses he dropped on mine and Sor’s foreheads before he left to do vampire lord shit, there was a storm brewing behind his eyes.
I could almost taste his fury in the air.
But more than that, I could see an emotion I never thought I’d see in his eyes.
Guilt. And that bothered me more than almost dying.
None of what had happened was his doing.
I stared down into the park that was separated from the block of stupidly expensive apartments by a busy London road.
Mothers meandered along a gravel pathway with pushchairs, their little ones toddling behind.
Joggers continued on their merry way, and tourists enjoyed the open space, oblivious to the monster watching their progress from the one-way glass of the penthouse window.
Warm lips kissed my bare shoulder, distracting me from the outside world.
A smile stretched my mouth as Sor’s small hands encircled my bare waist. My heart flipped, and my wolf rumbled his contentment at her nearness.
I hadn’t claimed her as a wolf typically would, with my fangs sunk in her neck, but she was still my mate in every way that mattered.
One day, when she felt safe and secure, and her time with Nicolai no longer gave her nightmares, I would ask her. Until then, I was happy by her side.
“How are you feeling this morning?” Her breath caressed my skin.
I turned and lifted her into my arms until she had no choice but to wrap her legs around me. “I’m feeling much better. How about you?”
The mage must have been telling the truth about helping her, because she’d had no ill effects from the poison. Which meant the other things he said likely had an element of truth. I still wasn’t convinced by the existence of a prophecy, but maybe it was time to get some definite answers.
“I’m fine.” Sor’s head tilted in question. “What are you thinking?”
“Have you seen Bal today?”
She pulled her bottom lip between her teeth.
“No, he wasn’t around when I woke up.” She looked at the plush leather recliner that took up a corner of the stylish bedroom.
Bal had taken to sitting there all night, watching over us as we slept.
He was still so gentle with the way he spoke to Sor, and careful when he insisted I feed from his wrist, but I could feel the storm of his emotions electrifying the air when he was in the room.
Even though his very nearness made me want to jump his bones, no matter my exhaustion, I kept my hands to myself.
He was clearly fighting some emotional demons, but he couldn’t pretend he was unaffected by what had happened to Sor and me, not when he sat in that fucking chair, watchful and brooding like some dickhead from a romance novel.
If there was even an element of truth to the mage’s words, we had a right to know.
I kissed Sor, taking her mouth slowly and thoroughly.
I’d not been inside her for days, and I was desperate to feel her heat and softness engulf my neglected cock.
Her long moan had blood rushing south, and it almost broke my resolve to go and find Bal.
But questions churned in my head, and part of me wondered if, now that I was recovered, he was avoiding me.
I pulled back and smiled. “I need to go and find him.”
“I know.” She dropped her legs and reached up to cup my face. “What’s going on, Shane? Who were the men who gave me that antidote?”
“I don’t know, but maybe Bal does. It’s time to find out why he’s been so attentive but won’t look me in the eye. He just sits in that damned chair all night watching us.”
Her chuckle warmed me. “Yeah, it’s disconcerting. I don’t really know how to handle it when he kisses my forehead so softly, and makes sure we have everything we could possibly need, right before he just…poof…disappears.” Her fingers wiggled through the air as she laughed.
My grin was genuine. “Yeah, it fucks with my mind when he moves that fast.”
“Seriously, though, do you think he feels guilty?”
I shrugged my shoulders. “Who knows? But I didn’t think he cared enough to feel much of anything, let alone guilt for an attack he couldn’t have prevented.
After all, it was my job to watch you, and I totally missed that the red head was up to anything, I was concentrating far too much on the obvious threat from those other fuckers. ”
“Yes, well, if someone wants to kill, no one can really stop them. Eventually, they’ll figure a way to do it.”
“I guess. You seem very accepting of it, little bird.”
She stepped away and walked to the window, then stood staring outside. “I accepted a long time ago that I was, and always will be, a pawn in someone else’s game. It’s easier than being constantly terrified or shocked when it happens.”
My stomach lurched at her soft tone. This was on me, too, not just Bal. Once again, I’d failed as a protector. My wolf whined, his shame infecting me. Yeah, buddy, I feel just as bad. Maybe one day we’ll get it right.
“I’m sorry I let you down, Sor. You being poisoned is on me, not Bal.”
She shook her head vehemently. “No. You don’t understand. I don't blame you or Bal. I should be able to protect myself, rather than relying on someone else to do it for me. I’m weak, and I’m sick of it.”
Her eyes flashed, and she breathed hard.
I stepped forward, running the back of my fingers down her flushed cheek.
“No, you are far from weak. You’re the strongest person I know.
You’re a survivor. Every time life throws something hideous at you, you hit right back.
You were poisoned, and we’ll find out why, but rather than blame Bal or me, you’re blaming yourself.
None of this, none of anything that has happened in your life, has been your choice, and definitely not your fault.
Don’t forget that. I’m all for you learning to protect yourself.
Only, in this world of brutal supernaturals, a human is always going to be vulnerable. ”
Guilt flashed in her eyes, and she dropped her gaze from mine.
“Sor?”
She didn’t look up from the floor, which had suddenly become very interesting to her. I firmly grasped her jaw and tilted it up. My eyes narrowed, and my wolf grumbled at the scent of confusion and remorse.
“What’s going on, little bird? It’s okay, you can tell me.”
“I’m not human. Bal told me. That’s how we saved you. He couldn’t do it alone.”
“What do you mean?”
“Apparently, Bal’s blood is susceptible to hemlock. It’s one of the only poisons his blood can’t heal. He told me to keep quiet about it. It’s his secret.”
I frowned. “Well, clearly someone else knows, or they wouldn’t have given it to me. It also means they know I have a lot of his blood in my system.”
She quietly coughed into her hand, her cheeks rosy as she looked away.
“My blood isn’t affected by it. Because I’m a witch.
That’s how we saved you. He cut you open, right to your heart, and I dropped my blood right in here.
” She placed a hand on my chest, but the way her face paled told me she wasn’t unaffected by what had happened.
“Bal pumped your heart with his fist until it began to beat on its own again.”
Stunned wasn’t a strong enough word for how Sor’s revelation made me feel.
It didn't make sense that the Made who wanted me to leave the Count would also try to kill me…unless he knew Sor was a witch. Anxiety twisted in my belly, but I worked to keep my face neutral. What did the Mades want with Sor? Was it to prove they knew she was a witch even before she did? My top lip curled as it occurred to me they were sending Bal a message for some reason. I had no idea what that might be, but he’d known she was a witch and not told her before he was forced to.
Bastard! Yeah, he owed us both an explanation.
This whole situation was more than just a coincidence or even an oversight.
Count Balthazar Rossi was clever and devious.
I knew that from my run-ins with him when I’d been part of Connor’s inner circle.
He had an agenda, a reason for keeping that knowledge from Sor and me.
And I was going to find out what it was.
“Wow…” I let her go and encouraged her to sit on the side of the bed. “You're a witch?” I kept my voice steady and managed to smile. Sor needed support, not suspicion. Her smile was weak, and the frown lines on her forehead betrayed her confusion and uncertainty about the whole thing.
“How do you feel about that?”
“I-I don’t really know. I don’t feel any different. But I have no idea what it means. I mean, do you think I can learn to cast spells? Is that what witches do?”
“I honestly have no idea. So he dropped that bombshell and hasn’t said anything about it since?”
“No.”
“Insensitive fucker….” I got up and started pacing, my heart banging harder in my chest the more I thought about it. “What the hell is he thinking? You can’t just toss something life-changing like that at someone and then ignore it. No explanation! He owes you that at least!”
Sor sighed. “Shane, slow down. Maybe he’s waiting for me to strike up a conversation about it. Maybe he’s giving me time to process and then go to him, rather than overwhelming me.”
I stopped my pacing and looked at her. Was she right?
Was being angry with Bal unfair? No, my feelings for him didn’t blind me.
He was too conniving to give her space. For some reason, he wanted to keep her in the dark.
Was that why he’d avoided us? Why guilt shadowed his eyes?
“Well, there’s only one way to find out. Let’s go.”