Into the Woods
“No,” Ari said, shoving it back.
“Please? I’ll love you forever.”
“I don’t want to.”
“If you don’t, I’ll hate you for the rest of my life.”
“I already hate you because you never gave me a blow pop.” Ari crossed her arms to match mine. We fell into a silent stare down until she caved. “Fine. Give it back.”
“I officially love you again.” I beamed and held out the razor.
“Uh-huh.” She sat on the edge of the tub as I awkwardly held out a leg. “I don’t understand why you have to shave the day after you broke an ankle.”
“Because I’m wearing shorts today and we’re with Dennis. I want smooth legs.” I held a hand against the shower wall to keep steady while she worked. “Thanks, Ari. Have I ever told you that you’re my favorite cousin?”
“Well, you’re not mine.”
I gasped. “I’m so offended. You hurt my feelings. All of them. Every single one. They’re gone because they withered away at your hate.”
“You can’t even feel anything.” She giggled.
“I don’t know why they gave you so much Vicodin again.
I think they like watching you act more ridiculous than usual.
” She straightened up and gave the razor back.
“Your legs are silky smooth. Now hurry up so I can take mine.” She slid the shower door shut.
“Thank you.” I went back to showering, keeping the makeshift cast far from the cascading water. “What time is it?” I knew we’d been in the bathroom for a long time, but that was all my foggy brain could remember.
“Too early,” she said, digging through the bag of bathroom supplies. “I couldn’t sleep at all.”
“How come? I don’t remember anything after eating ice cream last night.”
“Lucky. They were so loud all night. Shouting about random shit and playing video games until like six-thirty. Apparently vampires don’t sleep much.”
“Really?” I shut off the water and she gave me a towel. “That might be fun. Where’d you put my crutches?”
“What do you mean, where’d I put your crutches? I tried to bring them but you insisted on hopping here because, and I quote, you can ‘defy the rules of pain and gravity.’”
“I don’t recall.” I ruffled my hair and looked around. “Maybe they did give me too much. But I still can’t feel my foot. That’s good, right?” I secured the towel and looked down at the tub. “How’d I get over this stupid thing?”
“A one legged hop because that’s what a bunny would do. You don’t remember any of this?”
“Kinda? I was half asleep. Well, how am I supposed to get out? I can’t step over this without falling and I’m not hopping again. That’s like death waiting to happen.”
“I dunno, but I’m not helping. You’re gonna get me all wet.”
“Ari! Really? That’s so mean.” I gave my best puppy dog eyes, but she only laughed.
“I already did my cousinly duties for the day and helped you shave. You’re on your own.”
“Can you at least bring me some clothes?”
“Looking like this?” She glanced down at herself in disgust. “I’m not going back out there. What if they’re finally up? I’m not letting Sean see me like this.”
We turned as a quiet knock sounded at the door.
“Are you guys okay? You’ve been in there for an hour.” Sean’s voice floated through.
“Can you bring my crutches? Ari’s being mean and won’t get them.”
“Why don’t you just let me help?”
“Because I don’t want to,” I said politely.
“I told her to bring the crutches, but she wouldn’t listen,” Ari said, shooting me a smug expression as I glared.
“I didn’t need them earlier. And I don’t want him to help.” If anything, I’d rather have Dennis help. Not that I actually wanted him to, but it would be better than having another one of them see me half naked in two days.
“She doesn’t want you,” Dennis was suddenly outside the door, “she wants me.”
“I didn’t say I want you. I mentally, inwardly, thought to myself that you helping again would be better than Sean seeing me half naked, too. I didn’t say anything about wanting you. I just want some clothes and my crutches.”
“Jeez Vixen, I’ll help. There’s no need to beg.” Dennis’ shrill laugh mixed with Sean’s normal one as I groaned.
“This is good. It’ll be easier than you hobbling around,” Ari said.
“I’m opening the door in five seconds,” Dennis said.
“Wait, I look horrible!” she screeched.
“Three seconds.”
“Don’t look at me—!” She dodged the door as it flung open.
“Why? You look fine.” Sean scanned her from the doorway. She’d given up on hiding and was desperately smoothing her hair.
“Let’s get you out of that towel and into my bed.” Dennis brushed past her, smirking as my mouth dropped.
“What? No—” I tried to pull away but he hoisted me face first over a shoulder. “Dennis, you can’t carry me like this!” I let out a wail of protest and tried to kick his head with my good foot, but it couldn’t reach from this horrible angle.
“I won’t look, promise.” Sean moved aside as we passed, keeping his eyes on everything but me.
“And it’s nothing I haven’t seen before.” Ari smiled and waved before shutting us all out.
“Don’t worry, I won’t drop you.” Dennis disregarded my protests, like he really thought carrying me upside down through the hall was normal and okay.
“I don’t understand why you couldn’t just bring my crutches!”
“No need. We’re already here.” He opened a door at the end of the hall and strolled inside. My next attempt to kick his head kicked the door shut instead. He laughed and continued across the dark room.
“Are you sure vampires don’t melt? It’s so dark in here.” I craned my neck to look around.
“I like dark things.” His grip loosened and I slid down his chest into an armchair. He smiled as I grabbed the towel to keep it from slipping right off. “You’re so wet.”
“Because I just showered.” I twirled my hair into a messy bun, securing it with a tuck at the end. “Why do you have a coffin in here?” I pointed to the large thing in the middle of the room.
“I’m a vampire. Why wouldn’t I have a coffin?”
“You sleep in that?” I asked in disbelief. It was a legitimate coffin, handles and all. After all the times he’d laughed at me for believing stereotypes about vampires, here he was, embracing the biggest one of all.
“I think it’s funny. Don’t you? My bed’s a coffin.
” He flipped it open to show a luxurious mattress inside, complete with red satin sheets and pillows.
The only difference between it and something from a funeral home was its size; it was larger than a normal coffin, but still not as big as a typical bed.
“Custom sizing,” he added before I could ask.
“So you sleep in that because it’s funny?”
“No, I sleep in it because I’m a vampire.”
“You’re such a weirdo. Can you bring me some clothes now?” I was getting impatient and cold.
“But we’re having such good conversation.” He closed the coffin and sat on top.
“Dennis.”
“Fine.” He stood before asking, “Any preference?”
“I’m in the mood for shorts. Other than that, I don’t care. You better really bring me clothes and not wander off somewhere.”
“And you should really learn to trust me.” He strode out and left the door ajar, letting some light seep in.
The walls were dark, the curtains across the windows were even darker, and everything in the room resembled a gothic castle.
This was exactly what a vampire’s room should be. “Which is why I have the coffin.”
I jumped as he appeared in the doorway. He kicked the door shut, leaving us once again engulfed in darkness. He dumped a pile of clothes in my lap before propping the crutches against the chair.
“Thanks.” I lifted the clothes to see what he’d brought.
“Turn around. You’re not helping this time.
” I waited for him to face the coffin before dropping the top half of the towel.
I put on my bra and cropped tank top, then picked up my bottoms and stared at them, trying to figure out how this could work without putting weight on my injury.
“Sure you don’t need help?”
“Positive.” I maneuvered the underwear and shorts halfway up my thighs but after that, they wouldn’t budge. I wriggled, twisted, and strained, trying to keep weight off my bad leg before sighing in defeat. “Fine. Get over here. No peeking.”
“Relax, I won’t.” He came back and slipped both hands beneath my knees. “Ready?”
“Close your eyes,” I said. To my surprise, he did. “Okay, go ahead.” I waited for him to lift my bottom half, then dropped the towel and slid everything up. I made sure everything was zipped and buttoned before announcing, “All done. Thanks for helping.”
“I didn’t know you have another piercing.” He let my weight drop.
“You said you wouldn’t peek!”
“I was kidding.” He paused before a slow smile spread across his lips. “Wait, you do? Where is it?”
“No.” I snatched the crutches and pulled myself up. I would not be telling him about my clit piercing. That was for limited eyes only.
“Except you just did.”
“Did what?”
“Tell me. I heard that.”
I cursed and started crutching toward the door. “I hate you so much right now.”
“No, you don’t.” He walked beside me, finding entertainment in the fact I couldn’t outpace him.
“Are you still gonna be able to hear my thoughts when I’m a vampire?”
“Yup.” He held the door open. “As long as we’re bound, I can hear and feel everything.”
“That’s about you,” I finished.
“Sure. We’ll go with that.”
I continued down the hall until we reached the bathroom that Ari and I had been sharing. I veered inside and shut Dennis out. Luckily, she’d left our bag of supplies on the counter. I took my sweet time getting ready, savoring the short break before I’d have to be around him again.
“Emy?” There was a knock at the door.
“Yeah?” I glanced in the mirror as Ari came in.
“I think you’re about to leave.” She was already dressed, her waves damp from the shower.
“Right now?” My stomach filled with butterflies when she nodded. “Like right now, right now?”
“Yeah, right now. They said it’s cloudy enough to do it now instead of waiting until dark.” She stayed by my side as we headed down the hall. “Unless you wanna eat first or something?”