Chapter 22
RAFE
Iwalk through the warehouse with the dock supervisor trailing behind me, and he's talking through the manifest details while I nod along without really listening.
The pallets are staged and ready. The trucks are fueled.
The drivers have been briefed. Everything is in place, and there's nothing left for me to do except watch it all roll out and hope nothing goes wrong.
But my mind isn't here. It's back at the safehouse with Riley, wondering if she's still working through the files I left her or if she's finally taken a break.
I told her this morning that she'd done enough, that she could rest, but I know her well enough by now to know she won't stop until every loose end is tied off.
The dock supervisor says something about timing windows and I make a noncommittal sound in response.
He keeps talking, walking me through the route schedules and the backup plans if anyone gets flagged at a checkpoint.
I've heard all of this before. I went over it with my men yesterday, and again this morning while I drove into the city, and the repetition is starting to grate on me.
This shipment has to work. The toy drive has been our cover for years, and this is the last big push before the fiscal deadline.
If the trucks get stopped, if someone decides to open one of those barrels and look past the toys on top, we're done.
But standing here staring at pallets isn't going to change the outcome. Either the plan holds or it doesn't.
I cut the dock supervisor off mid-sentence. "You have your orders. The trucks leave at twenty-two hundred hours. Call me when they reach the first checkpoint."
He nods and walks off, and I head back toward the office where I drop into the chair and pull out my phone, intending to check in with Riley, but a notification catches my eye first.
It's a security notification from the hidden home surveillance system I have set up at the safehouse.
There was camera activity out front of the house, which isn't entirely unheard of if a bird or stray dog flits past. But it says motion detected for more than one minute straight, which definitely is out of the ordinary.
I tap on the first notification—because at second glance there are multiple alerts here—and the video loads.
The timestamp shows this afternoon while I was here going over shipment details.
The camera angle shows the back door of the safehouse, the one that leads out to the small deck.
The door is propped open, and one of my guards steps outside with a cigarette in his hand.
He walks to the edge of the deck and turns his back to the camera, exhaling smoke into the cold air.
Then Riley appears in the doorway.
My chest tightens and my eyes narrow as I focus in on the tiny screen. I can see her eyes are wide, her face pale, and she's holding something in her hand. Keys?
I watch for a moment as she retreats back inside the house and vanishes but Feodor stands there smoking his cigarette like he never noticed her watching him.
It doesn't appear like much else happens on this camera angle, so I flick to the second camera angle—the front door—and pull the status bar across until the red bar is highlighted, indicating the camera recording movement.
For a few seconds nothing shows on the screen, but then Riley's there, stomping through the snow with no coat on, and those same damn keys are in her hand.
I lean forward, my eyes locked on the screen. My stomach drops as I watch her stomping through the snowpack toward Feodor's car, and I think I might scream.
She's gonna run? Or she has run. This was over an hour ago and I never noticed it because I'm too busy doing my rounds here.
Riley reaches the car and stands there with her hand on the door handle. The seconds tick by on the timestamp but she doesn't move. She just stands there, staring at the car, and even though her back is to the camera I can see her shoulders hunch like she's conflicted.
"Don't do it," I whisper. "Fuck, Riley, don't do that to me."
If she runs, Sal will never in a million years accept that I want her, even if I can find her and drag her back. And what does that say about her devotion to me if she did?
My head hurts, and my heart is hammering in my temples. I watch the entire clip that lasts more than five minutes while Riley stands there, and then she turns around and walks back toward the house, where she disappears through the door.
Then she's gone, no longer in any camera's frame, and I flick to the other view to make sure. But even Feodor doesn't seem upset by anything. He finishes his cigarette a few minutes later and walks in the back door, and that's the end of my alerts.
"Holy fuck," I groan, dragging a hand across my face to smooth out the frustration and tension.
I set the phone down on the desk and lean back in the chair, staring at the ceiling. My pulse is pounding in my ears, and I feel something crack open in my chest.
Riley had the chance to get in Feodor's car and run away and she stayed. But why the fuck didn’t she run?
She's been begging me to leave, and the honest fact is she did think about it.
She thought about it long and hard enough to take his keys somehow and go to that car. And then she changed her mind.
But why?
My brain tries to spin a dozen feverish tales of why she'd just turn around and walk back inside, but my gut and my heart know the truth.
Riley loves me. She has to.
That's why she's been covering my tracks without my asking her. It's why even when I really hurt her, she forgave me and let me climb into that bed with her again. And it's why she had every chance in the world to get in that car and drive away, but she chose to stay.
I hear someone clearing their throat and look up to see my uncle standing in the doorway. I requested the meeting after deciding I had to do this, and Riley's choice to turn back and stay in that safehouse where I left her has now energized me beyond belief.
"Uncle Sal," I say, standing, and a giddy smile stretches across my face. I'm not a smiling sort of guy, but I can't stop. She loves me. And this meeting is going to change everything for us.
He waves me back down and takes the seat across from the desk. "The shipment looks good. Your men say everything's ready to move tonight."
"It is." I sit, relaxing in the chair but suddenly anxious to get this conversation over with so I can go tell Riley how incredible she is.
"Good. That's one problem handled." He leans back in the chair and folds his hands in his lap. "Now let's talk about the other one."
I know what he means before he says it. "Riley."
"Yes, Riley." Sal eyes me for a few seconds, and I get the feeling he's going to make me drag this out miserably if I don’t just cough it up, so I suck in a breath and start.
"I want her, Uncle Sal. And I don't mean I want an asset in my pocket.
" I'm being bold speaking plainly with him, but I know he respects men who speak their minds openly.
"I want her in my bed, in my life, and I want you to accept that she's not leaving my side.
" My chest puffs out slightly and I see the faintest hint of a smirk across his face before he sobers.
"Tell me why."
"Because she's proven herself over and over again, and she has skills we need." I have rehearsed this in my head so many times, there's no way I could forget. But he unnerves me as he presses.
"That's one reason. What's the other?"
I hesitate, and Sal's eyes narrow slightly.
"Don't bullshit me, Rafe. I need the truth."
"I love her," I say quietly. "I don't know how it happened, but it did. And I won't let her go."
Sal is quiet for a long moment, then he exhales slowly and shakes his head. "Young love…" He chuckles warmly and pulls a cigar from his pocket, reaching to his other for the cutter. "I remember what that feels like. Makes you think you can reshape the world to fit what you want."
"This isn't just about what I want. She's good for the organization. She's already too deep to walk away clean. Keeping her makes sense."
"Does it? Or are you trying to justify keeping her because you're afraid of losing her?" He snips the cigar, pulls out a lighter, and lights it up, pulling in one long drag that makes the cherry glow bright red.
The question stings, and I don't have a good answer to give him. Sal watches me, waiting, and I see the conflict in his expression. He's not just my uncle. He's the head of the family and his loyalty is to the organization first, not to me.
"I understand what you're feeling," he finally says.
"I do. But family can't be a sacrifice at the altar of your heart.
We've built something here, Rafe. Something that's lasted fifty years with my father before me till now.
And we've lasted because we don't take unnecessary risks.
We don't keep people around just because we have feelings for them. "
"She's not a risk. She's an asset, Sal." I look him straight in the eye and refuse to back down. "She's both. And you know it." He leans forward, his elbows resting on his knees.
"Let me ask you something. If she weren't in your bed, would you still be fighting to keep her?"
I open my mouth to answer, but the words stick in my throat. Would I? Or is Sal right? Am I trying to justify this because the thought of losing her makes my chest feel like it's caving in? Do I even care that I'm basing this purely on emotion for her and not on the substance she could add?
"I'm not saying you're wrong," Sal continues, "I'm saying you need to be honest with yourself about why you're making this decision. If you keep her and she turns on us, that's on you. And I can't protect you from the fallout."
"She won't turn on us," I say stubbornly, but now in my heart, I know it. Riley won't turn any more than she'll run, and I just watched her stay.
"How do you know?"
"Because she had the chance to leave today and she didn't." I pick up my phone and pull up the security footage, turning the screen toward him. "She could have run and taken everything she knows straight to the FBI. But she stayed."
Sal watches the video with a thoughtful expression, and when it finishes he nods at me and lifts his eyebrows. "Hmm, well, she's surprising, but we have to manage risks."
"So, what are you saying? That I have to get rid of her?"
"I'm saying you have options. And you need to think carefully about which one you choose.
" He stands and walks to the window, looking out at the warehouse floor below.
"If she finishes this job and delivers on everything you've asked her to do, and she proves she can be trusted, then we can talk about bringing her in. "
"And if she doesn't?"
"I think we've already discussed my thoughts on that." He slides a hand into his pocket while he sucks on his cigar.
The words feel like a punch to the gut. "I understand."
He turns to face me, and I see the sympathy in his eyes. "I know this isn't easy, Rafe. I know you care about her. But integrity is everything in this life. We don't survive by making exceptions for people we have feelings for. We survive by doing what needs to be done, even when it hurts."
I stand and walk to the window beside him, staring out at the warehouse floor. The pallets are being loaded into the trucks, lined up at the loading dock. Everything is being prepared for the shipment to roll out.
This is my life. It's what I've built. And Riley is tangled up in it now, whether I intended that or not.
"For your sake," Sal says quietly, "I hope she does well and finishes this job. I don't want to see you lose her, but if it comes down to protecting you or protecting the family, I'll choose the family every time. You understand that, don't you?"
"Yes."
"Good." He claps a hand on my shoulder. "Then let's hope it doesn't come to that."
He walks out of the office, leaving me alone with the heaviness of his statement. Riley finishes this job, or I lose her. There's no middle ground—no compromise, just a choice that'll determine whether she stays or goes.
I pull out my phone and look at the security footage again. Riley standing in the driveway but choosing to go back inside.
She loves me. I know she does. But is love enough to keep her loyal when the pressure gets too high, when she realizes she could trade everything she knows for her freedom?
I don't know. I'm not a gambling man, but I'd place a bet if I could. The thought of her not being there when I get back is painful.
But Sal is right.
You do for family, and Riley isn't family yet.
But I do hope to God I can make her family soon, because I can't stand the thought of living without her now.