16. SQUALO #2
This was the shark bay the sailors had talked about one night during one of my parties. One of them had claimed that if a shark came too close, you could shove it away with your hands.
Maybe.
But how were you supposed to push away a beast nearly four meters long?
The smaller sharks circling below us were barely half a meter, but the real monster surfaced again, bursting from the water before clamping its jaws around the drifting raft a few meters away.
It was now or never.
“We have to do it now,” I said, a little louder this time, panic already creeping into my voice.
She nodded.
We slipped into the sea as quietly as we could, careful not to splash and draw any more attention to ourselves.
Then we swam.
I was faster than she was. She kept falling behind, stopping every few strokes, crying as she struggled to keep going. Then she froze.
“There’s something below me.”
“Fuck.”
I turned and swam back to her.
“Grab my neck.”
She slowly climbed onto my back.
“Close your eyes,” I said. “And calm down.”
She didn’t answer.
I could feel her heart pounding against my back, beating so hard it almost matched my own. I swam as fast as I could, refusing to look behind me. I didn’t care what was there. I only wanted us to survive.
Relief washed over me as my feet touched the bottom of the sea.
Large rocks pressed beneath my soles, and a few more steps brought the water down to my knees. Small fish scattered around us, swimming between the rocks, probably hiding from the predators deeper out.
I turned around.
Shark was still there. Still following us.
“What the fuck?” I shouted.
I pulled Gabriella from my back into my arms and ran through the shallows until I reached the rocky shore. Her head knocked gently against my shoulder with every step.
When I finally lowered her onto the stones, she looked up at me with tired eyes, whispering, “Thank you.”
Before I could say anything, she wrapped her arms around me again, as though she’d been waiting for this moment all these years.
I let out a slow breath and held her back.
“It’s okay,” I said. “We need to find some kind of shelter before dark.”
She pulled away and scanned the island.
It was small, but still large enough that it would take around four hours to walk from one end to the other.
“Look,” she said, pointing ahead. “A cave.”
The cave was tucked into the coastline, half of it swallowed by the sea, and the other opening onto a narrow beach. It would do for a few hours. I wanted to reach the other side of the island before dark. The lighthouse was probably the safest place here, and maybe someone even lived there.
We made our way slowly towards the cave, reaching the entrance within a few minutes.
I kept Gabriella behind me while I checked every corner, making sure it was safe.
Apart from the shallow water pooling along one side, the rest of the cave opened onto a small beach scattered with smooth rocks.
On the right, a set of concrete steps climbed towards the top of the cave.
Maybe we really weren’t alone. Those steps hadn’t appeared on their own. Someone had built them, hauled concrete all the way out here. The thought eased something inside me, but it also kept me on edge. I had no idea who had been here, or whether they’d be hostile.
“Do you think there’s anyone here?” she asked.
“I don’t know,” I said. “We could stay here and rest, then figure out how to get to the lighthouse.”
She nodded.
Stepping past me, she untied the bandage from around her forehead and wrapped it around her wrist instead. She turned towards the sea and sat a few steps away, staring at the water. There was no panic in her face this time, only a restless unease.
“What if we’re stuck here forever?”
“We’ll manage,” I said, walking over to her.
I lowered myself beside her, the pebbles shifting and clicking beneath me, their sound rolling through the cave.
From my pockets I pulled out two small Valfrutta apple juice boxes with straws taped to the side. I peeled the straw free, pushed it through the silver foil, and handed one to her.
“Drink this.”
“You want to poison me?” she asked, taking the juice box.
She looked at me with those mischievous blue eyes, slipped the straw between her lips, and took a sip.
“You know,” I laughed, “I’ve thought about it a few times, but I think you could be useful.”
“Yeah,” she said with a sigh, taking another sip of the juice. “Now you have to drink yours, or I’ll really think you poisoned mine.”
I raised an eyebrow, keeping my eyes on her. I peeled the straw from my juice box, pushed it through the foil, lifted it to my mouth, and took a sip. The cold seawater had kept it surprisingly cool and refreshing, though it still had that bland, sugar-free taste made for children.
“It tastes like poison.”
She laughed and lay back on the rocks.
“This isn’t like me, Oliver. Or you,” she said. “We should be panicking, looking for something to eat, searching for anything that’ll keep us alive. But we’re just lying here, calm, on the edge of the beach.”
“Maybe we’re just tired,” I said, stretching out beside her.
“Maybe.”
She was quiet for a moment before asking, “What if we really have to stay here for the rest of our lives?”
“Honestly,” I laughed, “maybe that wouldn’t be so bad. I’ve wanted to get away from Amalfi for a long time.”
“Me too,” she said. “But somehow I’ve always been afraid.”
“Another thing you’re afraid of?” I turned onto my side, propping myself up on my elbow, the pebbles pressing into my arm as I rested my head against my palm.
She didn’t answer straight away. She drew in a slow breath.
“I’m afraid of a lot of things,” she said. “Including you.”
“Me?” I stared at her.
“You can be scary.”
“You too,” I laughed.
She turned to look at me. Her eyes were tired, red from crying, but she didn’t say anything.
There were so many questions I wanted to ask her and one finally slipped free from my mouth.
“Can I ask you something?” I finally said.
She nodded.
“Did you know about my dad and your mum?”
The question had been on my mind for so long that I wanted it out between us.
“What exactly?” she asked.
“You came to my house so many times when we were kids. Your mum always brought you with her. I don’t know how you didn’t realize there was something going on between them.”
She was quiet for a long moment.
“I knew,” she said honestly.
My hands began to shake.
The truth was, I’d known too, and I hadn’t told her. She’d probably thought the same thing.
“I saw them together a few times, and some things didn’t make sense to me when I was a child. Later, I started putting the pieces together.”
“You think things would have been different if they had stayed together after… you know… my mother…?”
“No,” she said simply. “My mother is such a selfish person that she would have dragged us all to the bottom. I think that’s one of the reasons your father left her right after your mother died.”
She drew in a slow breath. “I pushed it away for a long time because she dragged me everywhere with her when I was a child, like she wanted me to see every ugly part of the world. And when I met your mother, she realized maybe she could use me to distract her, and I hated that part.”
That hurt more than anything she’d said so far. She had known them. She had understood them. But she had never understood me. Why I was so angry because of it…
I shot to my feet.
“So you knew?” My jaw locked. “You knew all this time that your mum was fucking my dad while you were out in the garden drawing with my mum?”
“No,” she said, reaching for the words, but I cut her off.
“Save your fucking excuses, Gabriella.”
I turned and stormed out of the cave, leaving her behind.
She scrambled after me.
“Don’t leave me.”
“You deserve it.” The words shot from my mouth.
“You deserve to be alone.” My hands flew to my temples as pressure built inside my skull. “Do you know how much it hurts? Knowing you knew all along, and you kept coming to see my mum while your mother was sleeping with my dad behind our backs?”
Each word came out sharper than the last.
“You’re just like her. You’re just like your mother.”
Her eyes filled with tears.
“That’s not true, Oliver.”
She took another step.
“Don’t come any closer.” I pointed at her, my hand shaking. “You and your mother are the main reason my mother is dead. Maybe Gianni too, since he’s the spitting image of our father.” I laughed bitterly. “But you probably knew that as well.”
“Excuse me?” she whispered. “Gianni is… whose son?”
“Yes.” A hollow laugh escaped me. “Imagine that. He’s my brother too. It’s a wonder you’re not as well. Then we could all have been one big happy family. Seems your father screwed up their plan.”
“I hate you.”
She turned away, tears spilling freely.
“I would rather drown than be on this island with you.”
“Maybe I should have let you drown.”
The moment the words left my mouth, they tore through me too, sinking deep beneath my skin.
She let out a broken sob and ran back towards the cave.
Part of me hated myself for saying it.
Life had a way of throwing everything at me at once, and now that I couldn’t carry it anymore, everyone around me was getting crushed beneath it.
I had to leave before I hurt her even more, because the anger inside me was swelling until it felt impossible to contain.
At that moment, I knew I could destroy her without blinking.
So I walked.
The narrow path climbed towards the hill, and I kept my eyes on it while her sobs echoed out of the cave behind me, following me long after I’d left.
I squeezed my eyes shut, my fists clenched so tightly I felt the skin pulsate under my nails.
I left her again.
This time, it hurt me even more.
What is happening to me?
I’d never felt anything like this before.
What is she doing to me?
She had reached into every buried part of me and shaken it awake.
Now I couldn’t stop feeling.
Fuck Blue. I’ll destroy you the same way you destroyed me.