Chapter 9
Theo Maddox had never imagined being a senior in high school would be this “magical” experience that everyone described it as.
Now, mere months before he and his other classmates walked the stage to receive their diplomas, he felt the crushing weight of the world that waited on them.
Everyone constantly asked, “Did you get into college yet?” “What are you going to do after this?” “How are you going to make your money?”
He had gotten into culinary school, of course. But he was often too frightened to mention that.
What made this enormous change worse, he felt, was being best friends with Juliet Harper.
Ever since they’d been kids, Juliet had been sure about her future in modeling and the fashion world.
Now, she spoke about it as though it were a certainty, as though she was practically already hired.
Sometimes the panic Theo felt about losing her made him want to say something like “People don’t just become models, Juliet.
Get that out of your head. It’s insane!”
But he was too frightened of her to tell her the truth, so he smiled at her and told her she was going to be famous. She liked when he said things like that.
Now, as snow piled up outside and there were whispers about school being canceled tomorrow, Theo, Juliet, and their other best friend Callie burrowed under blankets at Juliet’s place, preparing to watch a DVD.
It had been the three of them, almost constantly together, for years—especially after last summer, when Callie’s boyfriend Jeremy had broken up with her.
As ever, there was a massive bowl of popcorn between them, covered with parmesan cheese and salt, and Juliet was listing all the movies available to them, including a few Ivy had rented for them during a recent trip to the rental store.
The Aviator with Leonardo DiCaprio was a big one that year, as were Garden State and Million Dollar Baby.
Juliet’s oldest sister Celia had been gone for years at this point. They never heard from her.
“Juliet?” Wren, who was fifteen and bright-eyed and funny, came into the living room, probably hoping to hang out with them. “Juliet, did you take my sweater again?”
“The pink one?” Juliet asked.
“Did you take the pink one, too?” Wren looked miffed.
“Callie and I were putting together looks for my portfolio,” Juliet said simply. “Everything I took from your room should be on my bed.”
Wren looked disheartened. Callie got up and said, “I’ll help you find it!
” Together, they went back upstairs, leaving Theo and Juliet on the couch.
Theo’s heart pumped. He adored being alone with Juliet, but it also terrified him.
He wasn’t sure what blood pressure was, but he was pretty sure his skyrocketed when it was just the two of them.
Juliet put her head in her hands and sighed. It was a performance that Theo knew demanded a question from him.
“What’s up?”
“It’s just Callie,” Juliet said. “She’s still sort of trying to convince me to stay in Bluebell.
I mean, it makes me feel so guilty. And it makes me feel like I can’t be honest about what I’m thinking?
Because I don’t want to hurt her. Actually, I wish she wanted more for herself!
” She removed her hands and looked Theo in the eye.
“You know, my family is not very honest with each other. I thought I could be honest with Callie. But maybe I can only be honest with you?”
Theo’s mouth went dry with a mix of fear and longing. Ever since their first kiss when they were twelve, Theo had willed himself to recreate that moment again. But Juliet had always found a way to move away from him and ensure there was always a boundary.
“You can always be honest with me,” Theo said quietly.
Juliet squeezed his shoulder. “Thank you. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”
* * *
When school returned after the snowstorm, Theo found himself sketching back in the art room.
It was a small class, ten students all told, with Callie and Theo being the only two seniors.
Callie was the best art student in the class, able to master everything from painting to sculpture to printmaking.
Their art teacher, Mrs. Simmons, adored her and frequently said that Callie had a future in the art world if she wanted it. Callie just blushed.
Now, Theo watched as Mrs. Simmons went over to Callie and spoke under her breath, but just loud enough for Theo to hear. “They want a new mural in the cafeteria,” she was saying. “And I couldn’t think of anyone else to design and paint it! What do you think?”
Callie’s eyes widened. Theo knew she wasn’t used to being selected for anything.
“The entire wall?” Callie asked. “I don’t know if I can do it on my own.”
Mrs. Simmons raised her eyes and found Theo’s, peering at her. “Maybe you could ask Mr. Maddox to help you? He knows his way around a paintbrush. Don’t you, Mr. Maddox?”
Theo laughed. “I’m nowhere as good as Callie.”
Callie grinned. “You’re pretty good, Theo. Come on. I can’t do it by myself.”
Theo heard himself agree.
That afternoon, Juliet invited Callie and Theo over to her place to watch movies and hang out. But Callie and Theo needed to get started on the mural pronto. When they explained to Juliet what they were up to, Juliet said, “You’re really going to waste your time with that?”
It was clear that this hurt Callie’s feelings. But Callie was too shy to let anyone know that for sure. “It’s dumb,” she agreed with Juliet. “But I’m basically being forced, so.”
Juliet went home alone, leaving Theo and Callie in the cafeteria with a mountain of scratch paper.
Sitting at a long, skinny table, Callie explained to Theo her vision for the wall: the artists she wanted to imitate, as well as the spirit of the school she wanted to shed light on.
“Juliet would think I was so lame if she heard what I was saying,” Callie said with a smile.
Theo rubbed his palms together. “There’s nothing lame about it. Let’s get started right away.”
Callie had made up several sketches of the Picasso-adjacent Bluebell Cove High School mural, which Theo helped her finalize and outline on the wall.
By the end of their first session together, they’d traced the pencil outline with black paint, boxing them into a design that Callie felt was “some of my best work yet.” Theo watched as she beamed at what she’d done.
He felt a strange thumping in his heart.
That night, after he’d finished his calculus homework and was on the computer, he got an instant message from Juliet, asking him about the mural.
JULIET: How stupid is it?
Theo furrowed his brow and got offline immediately. He wasn’t willing to drop into Juliet’s world just now. He found that he was still buzzing from his hours of making art with Callie.
It took three weeks in total to finish the mural.
Nearly every day after school, Theo and Callie met to paint and eat snacks and talk.
Juliet sometimes hung around, acting bored and waiting for them to finish, but Theo’s favorite days were the ones when Juliet went home instead.
She said she had applications to pass to agents in New York City and photographs to send to managers, that kind of thing.
Theo hardly listened to what she had to say.
A part of him had decided to give up on Juliet. A part of him had already said goodbye.
Toward the end of their mural sessions, Mrs. Simmons came in to check on them.
She brought a platter of chocolate chip cookies and a big smile of thanks.
“I can’t believe how good it’s looking,” she said, her hands on her hips and a bit of melted chocolate on her cheek.
“This is going to be celebrated by students in Bluebell High for many years to come!”
Theo took a cookie and watched as Callie beamed with pride. “It was all her,” he said finally.
“As if,” Callie said, although it truly had been.
“I hate to bother you about this again, Callie. But have you made a decision about NYU?” Mrs. Simmons asked tentatively.
Callie blushed and glanced at Theo. Theo’s heartbeat quickened. NYU?
“I haven’t. Not yet,” Callie said.
“Well, you know you have to make up your mind pretty soon!” Mrs. Simmons said. “They don’t hold spots in that art school forever. And Callie…” She sighed. “These chances are once in a lifetime. You know that, don’t you?”
Callie said she did, then picked up her paintbrush and returned to the mural. It was clear she didn’t want to talk about it anymore.
When Mrs. Simmons left again, Theo walked up beside his dear friend, crossed his arms, and said, “NYU, huh?”
Callie’s cheeks were still ferociously red. “It’s not a big deal.”
“It’s obviously a big deal. Mrs. Simmons says so.”
“Mrs. Simmons has never left Bluebell Cove,” Callie said. “She thinks she understands what’s out there. Fame and glory and money and whatever. But I’m the kind of person who would fall on their face the minute they get to the big city.”
Theo’s stomach tightened into knots. “That’s not true.”
Callie laughed. “Come on. I’m not Juliet. I wasn’t made for that big, open world.
“But NYU is amazing, Callie,” Theo said, as though he knew anything about NYU.
Callie huffed.
“And Juliet will be in the city, right?” Theo reminded her. He told himself not to let jealousy get the better of him over his two best friends moving to the city without him.
“I mean, yeah. I guess so.” Callie’s tone was flat. “That’s always been the plan, right?”
Theo took a step back, aghast. Did Callie not want to be with Juliet? Did Callie not see herself in Juliet’s life after graduation? Before he could say anything else, Callie turned and began to clean her paintbrush. Something about the way her head was tilted told Theo that she was crying.
“I love Juliet,” Callie murmured. “I’ll always love Juliet. But I’m getting tired.”
Theo understood what she meant: that Juliet’s ever-present lust for a different life so often overshadowed Theo and Callie. Too often, they felt like stepping stones for Juliet. Too often, it felt as though she would forget about them the minute she left Bluebell Cove. And why wouldn’t she?
“You could be really successful,” Theo said to Callie, his throat tight.
“I don’t really care about success,” Callie answered honestly. “Name one person who’s happy and successful.”
Theo searched his mind, thinking of actors, directors, artists, and writers, people who’d fought to the top of the social ladder only to have their personal lives fall apart.
When Callie turned to look at him, he felt a sharp ache in his chest. He wondered if, all this time, Callie had been the voice of wisdom in their lives. He wondered if she knew more about the world than she’d ever let on.