Chapter 21
Chapter Twenty-One
Avril
At my desk for most of the day, I worked and daydreamed about going home. Kir was great. I was a mess, but throughout the day, his admission of love replayed like the most important moment of my life. He’d told me how he felt, and I'd stood there without saying a word.
In every book I read or movie I watched on repeat, love fixed everything.
Spreadsheets of numbers were numbing my brain as I imagined a life in which I never sat in my cubicle.
Soon, I’d leave for the day, go home to Kir, and definitely bite the bullet and tell him that he had my heart.
All my arguments with myself stemmed from not bringing up that in conversation.
My sister’s warning had been because she wanted me to be safe, but if I did that, I wouldn’t live.
And the word love played in my mind. But I wasn’t even sure how to change enough to be in Kir’s world.
I was working on the analysis when Lauglin came in and knocked on the wall. “Ziff needs to see you in his office.”
The smirk on his face sent a chill through me. “On my way.”
I turned off my screen and grabbed my pocketbook just in case. As I passed him, he said, “You almost had us all fooled.”
I narrowed my eyes, and my lips opened, but then a chill rushed through me. “Wh…? Never mind, Lauglin.”
I went down the hall and knocked on the door to the conference room, where Ziff sat. He motioned for me to come in, and the second I sat, he said, “Avril, your little game is over.”
He sat back and crossed his arms. I froze. “What’s going on?”
He was unreadable as he said, “You’re fired.”
I tried to rationalize what I’d heard. “Excuse me?”
He folded his hands. “The game is over now, and you’re fired.”
So I hadn’t misheard anything. Heat rushed through me. “Can I ask why?”
He stared out toward security and nodded at them. “You lied to us. Goodbye.”
The guards I passed every morning came in, and I jumped up. I wasn’t sure what had happened, but this was a disaster. I had no job and no income, and I was being kicked out like a thief.
My shoulders slumped. Security directed me to my desk and watched me as I collected my things. I’d never had much but a change of shoes and some coins for the snack machine. I carried my old black flats and headed out.
Once I passed the gates, I was left alone. I tossed the old shoes and grabbed my phone from my pocketbook.
I wasn’t sure what I would do, but I realized school was over, so I quickly called my friend, who worked not far from my office building. “Kelly, are you done for the day?”
“Yeah. What’s going on?”
I gazed up at the high-rise buildings, and tears formed in my eyes. “I’ve been fired.”
“Is it because of that stupid blog post?”
I half hugged my waist and walked toward her work. I hoped she could come out and we could talk for a few minutes. I needed someone to think for me because I was numb. “I don’t think so. Ziff said I lied.”
“Did you read this afternoon’s gem?”
My heart raced. I gazed down the three blocks I needed to walk as I flipped my phone to speaker so I could read while I talked to her. “On my way to your work, so come out, but I’m reading now.”
“I don’t believe you were faking. And there is no way you’d ever be paid to be his sexually. That’s not you.”
In the middle of the sidewalk, as people passed me, I rocked back and forth on my feet. “My sister could read this.”
“Does it matter?”
Tears washed down my face. Some of the messaging was true, and the world now knew I’d asked Kir to help me get ahead at my job. I swiped my face as I read the clear lie. “It’s horrible. I traded myself to Kir for sex with more evidence coming later.”
“Total bull. I’m sure Kir’s brother Jeff is working with Miley on the case.”
At least my friends believed me. My shoulders slumped as I stood outside her school building. I saw her coming out and said, “I don’t know what to do.”
“I’m studying for a job change myself. Go home. Talk to Kir. He seems really into you.”
I lowered my face. I’d ruined everything. “He… said he loved me.”
She walked with me toward Central Park. “So you and Hope are both ending up happily ever after.”
I met her gaze. It was time to tell the truth. “I didn’t say it back.”
She bumped into me, and her gaze was piercing. “Why not? It’s obvious how you feel, and as Britney would say, ‘We don’t tell trillionaires no when they offer us everything.’”
I laughed. She had Britney down. I shook my head. “Because I don’t want to depend on him and everything he has to offer.”
“Why?”
I wrung my hands. “Because it means I can’t take care of myself, which is crazy.”
She flinched, and I wasn’t sure why, but then she said, “I understand that. I don’t make as much as the rest of you.
I became a teacher because I liked the job but also because it’s steady and secure, and school was the only place I ever truly fit in.
Branching out to be a Realtor is a big step out of my comfort zone, but I’m trying because the principal hates me. ”
Well, that explained that. “You can do anything you want.”
We neared the subway station and the edge of the park. She said, “I never wanted to go out there and take over the world. I always admired your ambition, but if you let that blind you, then you’ll end up alone.”
I froze. Ambition wasn’t what held me back. That was too lofty. I had no idea what I would do in a life in which I wasn’t focused on a task, and work was the only thing that gave me little missions to accomplish every day.
She said, “I’ve got to go, and you need to talk to the man you love.”
My ears buzzed. I waved her off and then walked through the park. I needed to clear my head. I wished life was like the movies, but I wasn’t stupid. This was the end. It was obvious that our fake dates were over because in time, Kir would see I was no good for him.
I was addicted to having a job In which I followed directions, and while it was great that Hope was partnering with Charlie, they were equals.
If I took a pity job from Kir, it would only be temporary, and eventually, our relationship would burn out.
But Kelly would lend me her couch till I figured out what to do, so I wasn’t dependent on Kir or anyone.
The doormen had the door and called the elevator for me the second I walked in. My arms grew cold. I wished this was my home where I lived with Kir.
My heart twisted as I let myself in and heard drums and maybe shells and ukuleles playing. The air smelled clean with a definite hint of coconut. As I took off my shoes, I heard men’s voices.
I called out, “Kir, what’s going on?”
He stepped out of the living room and smiled at me. “You’re early.”
My stomach twisted. Then another man came in and stood beside him. I asked, “Michael, Charlie’s butler?”
“I can leave you two alone.” Michael headed to the door.
Kir called out with a wave, “That’s a good idea. See you later.” Then he came closer to me. “Why are you home?”
I marched past him to the living room and turned off the music from his phone that was playing on the blue tooth. I plopped down on the couch in front of a coconut display. “I was fired because of that blog, and it says more is coming soon.”
He grabbed his phone from the table and read as he sat next to me. “Was there… we’ll sue.”
I hugged my waist. “I don’t know what I’m going to do. I was fired.”
He folded his hands in front of him. “You can work with me, Charlie, and Hope.”
There it was. “I don’t want a pity job.”
His eyes widened. “I need an analyst, and you qualify. It’s not charity.”
This was it for me, and I had no right to say no to any job. Money made the world go around. My skin tingled. “I wish I could just stand on my own feet, but I’ll think it over. Work was how I paid for my sister’s healthcare. And now everything is ruined.”
“I can speak to my brothers about your job. They’re still buying, as far as I know.”
Tears welled in my eyes. I hated this. I gazed into his warm brown eyes. “I don’t want charity. I’m just lost and confused.”
“What can I do?”
Nothing. He was wonderful. “Just let me breathe.”
“I can do that.” His phone buzzed in his hands.
Hope clung to me as I asked, “Who’s calling?”
He showed me the screen. “Jeff. It’s probably about this blogger.”
I gestured for him to answer. “I hope he finds ‘Regina’ fast.”
Kir placed the call on speaker and quickly said, “Jeff, Avril lost her job today.”
He said, “I’m so sorry. I’ll figure this out. I called to warn you, but it’s clear you know. Miley formally accepted the job offer today to help me find out who this woman is.”
“Good,” I mumbled and decided I’d ask Miley later.
“And Maman is looking to talk to you.”
“I’ll call her soon.” Kir hung up and turned his attention back to me. “If it matters to you, I hope you trust me.”
Trust was one thing. but I wasn’t meant for his world. I pressed a hand to his cheek and then took it back. Touching was too tempting. I stood up. “I know you didn’t do anything on purpose, Kir, but I think it’s best I leave and spend the night at Kelly’s.”
His eyes widened as he stood with me. “You’re breaking up with me?”
I rocked on my feet, nodding. We weren’t even a thing. My mind raced. “We were never really dating. You’ll find someone better suited to you.”
Tears threatened to fall. I rushed to the door, grabbed my shoes from the closet, and ran out the door.