17. Chapter 17
Camille
Iknew before it happened that I was about to get pulled into another vision.
One second, I was listening to a conversation about different planets that would be ideal for us to train on. They were throwing around names I had never heard of. Planets I didn't even know existed, until they had been mentioned in our current conversation.
They were discussing which would be the least time consuming to land on—what the pros and cons of all of these different places might be—and which of the people would notice us the least. We couldn't entertain a slew of questions.
The next thing I knew—I felt the backward sensation pulling me away, the feeling of a vision taking hold. I wasn't sure I would ever get used to the sensation of it. It wasn't uncomfortable or painful, just unpleasant.
The intensity of the pull was like a vortex sucking me up inside—stealing my mind from me without my permission—demanding I watch something I didn't want to see.
There is smoke all around me. Rubble litters the area. There is glass underneath my hands. My body is so weak.
I appear to be outside and my hands are dirty. I look down at my clothes and I’m filthy. My clothes are ripped and soaked in blood. I move and wince at the pain in my stomach and chest. I lift up my shirt to find purple bruising and deep lacerations. My blood is seeping out of my wounds slowly.
I hear the deep voice then. Kyril is yelling and I can hear Jerrod yelling something back.
I suddenly see Jerrod come flying toward me at a terrifying speed.
He lands close and the force of the movement has him careening toward me like a speeding bullet.
His body twists in an unnatural way as he bounces each time he hits the ground.
I’ve been here before. I know this scene.
He lands next to me. I grip his hands. The blood is running out of his mouth.
I see the blood beginning to pool around him, deep scarlet and shimmering, soaking into the ground beneath us.
I’m panicked, trying to pick out any information to help me figure out where we are in this moment.
I can hear Kyril laughing from afar. I look into Jerrod’s eyes and a strange look plays across his face. A different one from the last time I saw this. It was a look of knowing, presence, like he was here with me. I gasp.
“You see it too, don’t you?” I whisper.
“Camille?” Jerrod says, with wide eyes.
“Now you know,” I say as I touch his face. Then I see the realization. My heart is slowing. We are both close to dying and his face changes like he knows in that moment what will happen. This is when he says…
He cuts my thought off, eyes full of agony, “Please, forgive me, Camille. I don’t want this to be our end.”
I didn’t understand what that meant, anymore than I understood the first vision. Just like that, I’m being pulled back, yet again to the real world.
I blinked my eyes, trying to make sense of what I had just experienced. Everyone was staring at me. I felt groggy as my mind caught up with everything I had just seen and experienced. I looked over to Jerrod and his face was horror stricken.
“What the fuck did you just see?” Josiah asked. “Your faces are not instilling much hope here.”
“I… uh… I’ve had this vision before,” I stuttered. “Right after… the bonding ceremony.”
“Care to elaborate?” Veshkru asked, with a look of dread.
“Well, you all remember the vision, the one right after the bonding? I told you we were dying. It was almost exactly the same vision,” I explained. “But, there was a difference this time.”
“Wait, you had a vision we were dying?” Josiah asked with wide eyes.
“We, as in Camille and I,” Jerrod corrected, with a stony expression on his face.
“You said something was different,” Kresh said to try to get us back on topic.
“Yes… I saw it from my perspective again and like last time, it was like I was actually there, living it,” I explained. My eyes locked with Jerrod’s and he quickly looked away from me. “Oh no, you don't get to do that, Jerrod Alexander!”
“What the actual fuck is going on?” Josiah asked, as his eyes darted between Jerrod and back to me.
I gripped Jerrod’s hand in my own, just like I had in the vision and he tried to stifle a sharp intake of breath. “You were there! I fucking knew it! What did you see that I can’t?”
“Will someone please explain to me what is happening?” Veshkru snapped.
My eyes stayed on Jerrod, waiting. He definitely saw something.
Something I didn't know or understand. He knew what he was going to do in that moment. I saw it clear as day on his face. I saw the moment the decision snapped into place in that vision. When his eyes found mine, I knew he wasn’t going to tell me.
“I can’t, Camille. If we actually end up in that moment, you not knowing, is the only way,” He said sadly.
I found myself cocking my head back slightly, eyebrows tilting together, as I tried to comprehend what he was saying.
I softly choked out, “You can’t? Or… you won't?”
It was like the rest of the room fell away, and it was just me and him, sitting alone with this horrible realization.
The moment was smothering. We were going to die and he knew it.
I knew it. A single tear rolled down my face.
I quickly wiped it away with the back of my hand, and I tried desperately to hold back the tremble I could feel on my lip.
“Please, Camille, don’t cry,” He begged. “I can’t bear hurting you, but I hope you never have to learn this.”
I looked around at everyone else, their judging stares falling on both of us.
I wasn’t even sure what to say. I couldn’t stand the weight of their eyes fixed on us, so I did what any emotional person would do, and I ran as fast as I could out of the room.
The tears spilled freely down my face. I felt so weak in that moment.
The impending doom and loss of this life—our life together—was more than I could bare in that situation.
The nausea rolled over me like a violent wave, coiling my stomach into an uncomfortable knot.
I ran to a utility room, shut the door behind me, and slipped down into the corner.
I always tried to seem so strong, so put together, but in this moment, it was just…
too much. It was all too much. My cup was full and all of the emotions were finally spilling over the top.
I pulled my knees to my chest, releasing all of the despair.
I stared off into the endless nothingness, eyes blurring in and out of focus, and found myself slowly slipping into a dreamless sleep.