Chapter 8
Chapter Eight
Standing at the window, I stare across the Crone Pack and wonder how exactly I found myself in this utter shitshow.
I’m married to Blackfire. The Crone alpha can’t be killed without dooming a small child to the same fate, and my revenge feels like it is slipping away.
Without it? What is left but a shell of a body that I don’t know how to fill with the light and love I got from Tannith.
This room reminds me so much of the one I stayed in when Tannith was still here—of the woman who helped me get dressed and ignored my jokes, like when I requested I burn at the stake instead of going into the Folkland.
How things have changed, and not for the better.
I clutch my arms around my chest, feeling tears building in the corner of my eyes.
I have to get out of here. I turn but stop instantly when I see myself in the mirror.
My braid is messy, strands of my hair have escaped and stuck to my neck, and my pale skin has a glow about it, almost like my glowing gold mark on my neck.
The crown of stars…just like the dark god wants.
A sharp sting of pain suddenly stabs into my mind, leaving me with a new memory.
I run after Dain, whose stupidly long legs make this game of tag unfair.
He is fast, and soon he has left me behind in the dark flower maze.
All my friends are scared of the maze; they say the fairies will come out of the flowers and eat children like us.
Dain and I both don’t care about the stories.
I lean against the wall, catching my breath before kicking a rock in frustration.
“Stupid brother. Stupid boys. Stupid stories.”
“That’s no way for a princess to speak.” My mama’s soft voice echoes in the air, and I turn, seeing her walk around the maze corner.
Her gold hair is cut short, falling just below her ears, and her tiara of glittering black diamonds catches the sunlight.
Her gown is pitch black, with gold flowers at the edge of the skirt, which brush the ground as she comes to me.
“You’re both late for dinner. Once again. ”
“I’m sorry, mama.” I pick up my muddy skirts of my gold dress, and my mother sighs when she sees the state of it.
“Your brother was born to be a prince, but you, my darling, were to be a wild, untamed princess. Do you know what that means?” I shake my head and stop at her side.
She touches my gold locks, which are darker than hers and more like Dadda’s.
“It means you have a choice between good and evil. Between light and dark and all the grey that stands in the middle. They say the royals of Oblivion are the grey, and when one of us is born, the scales tip. They can tip you into darkness or into light, but the choice is in the mind of the royal and no one else.”
“What did you tip into?” I ask, not really understanding what she is saying.
Her gold eyes meet mine, the nasty, rough scar across her cheek catching my gaze for a second. “It is undecided for me, but your father, he keeps us both in the light. There would only be one reason I’d ever tip into the darkness.”
We both hear Dain calling for me. I wonder which side Dain will tip into, which side I will. “What would make you tip into darkness?”
She leans down, kissing my forehead. “Losing either of my children, my untamed one. For you both, I would ruin this world.”
I gasp as the memory slips away, my first strong and real memory of my mother and Dain.
Mother above, she was beautiful and fierce…
and I loved her so much. I loved Dain and my dadda too, but my mama was my best friend.
I couldn’t stand to be away from her, and now what Dain said about me sneaking onto the ship for the pack trip makes sense. I want to remember more.
The door is knocked once before it opens slightly, and I hesitate for a moment, wiping away my tears.
I don’t want to deal with anyone else today.
I reluctantly turn, hoping it’s not one of the heirs.
I can sense they’re near, and they haven’t gone far since I asked for space and walked out with Zyran over an hour ago.
Zyran is flying outside this room, but his power lurks in every corner, protecting me, so who would he let—
“Hey, it’s me.” Elizabeth. My eyes barely get a second to take her in before she’s across the room, gripping me tightly.
More hugs. I have to get used to this, I think.
I wrap my arms around her and look over as Illyia follows behind and shuts the door before leaning on it with a soft smile.
“Are you okay?” Elizabeth asks. “I could sense through our guardian bond that you were unsettled.” She lets me go and pats the mark on her wrist, just like the one on mine.
I swore to protect her and for her to be my guardian, but so far, I’ve been shit at it.
When I don’t say a word, she carries on. “Of course you’re not okay; you’re married and…I’m so sorry about Tannith. I know she and I never really had much communication, and she did try to bite me a few times, but I know you loved her. I know she loved you. I could sense it.”
“I did. I wish I could…” I drift off because wishing is a fool’s hope. It isn’t going to change the fact that she died as a drake and is buried in the ground.
“There are so many things we’d all change if we could just wish.
” Elizabeth touches my arm. I finally look at her and realise someone has been caring for her.
Elizabeth’s wearing a simple dark green dress, with two daggers clipped to her waist, both of the blades red.
Her hair is braided back at the sides, falling down to her waist, and her green eyes are lined black, reminding me so much of her half-brother.
“No matter what, it is good to see you well and alive. I think we have much to talk about…like how I’ve heard you’re a princess now. ”
“Makes two of us, doesn’t it?” I arch an eyebrow. “But yes… I don’t remember much of my childhood, but memories are coming back slowly.”
“I don’t think they really class me as a princess back in my pack anymore, considering they want me dead.
” She winces but quickly smooths her face.
“Blackfire promised me safety here, and so far, that seems to be holding true. He left me with twenty-four-seven guards that he trusts and made sure I was safe from Orion. Not that I’ve seen him or Reed, to be honest. I only saw Blackfire for a short time the night after the Folkland when he brought me here and explained he was looking for you.
” Blackfire kept her safe, and I know it was for me.
I’m not sure how to feel about that. “I’ve also met your friend, Illyia. You never told me about her.”
Illyia laughs low. “I should be insulted, but I’m not. Mere over here assumed I was only nice to her for Tannith, which isn’t true.”
Elizabeth smiles at me. “We aren’t all good at trusting people, huh?”
“No.” I rub my arm. “But I trust you. Tannith always hated that you and I were friends, until the end.” I clear my throat. “Illyia kind of grew up with us.”
“In a sense.” Illyia settles herself across the room on a chair by the empty fireplace. “My family’s house was a little way down from the orphanage.”
Sorrow settles in my chest as I remember the burnt-out building I grew up in.
The twenty-four lives that were lost when the Crone alpha decided to burn the place down.
Now he’s used a child—ironically—to save his own life.
A child that Blackfire is clearly fond of, who ran in crying over my accidentally throwing her cousin across the room.
I can’t kill her, and the Crone alpha knows it.
He damn well knows I have a soft spot for children, and he used it to make sure he is safe.
But I’m not giving up. He will die. When I get back to Void City, I am going to read every book in the throne room until I find a way to break the binding marks.
The ones on the heirs and my neck were gone when we were made into Champions, so even though I don’t know how to replicate that, there has to be a way.
I manage to pull my focus back to what Illyia’s saying.
“We used to go to school together, but I would always sneak back to the orphanage with Mere and Tannith whenever I got the chance. My parents always made way too much food for lunch, and I know they did it on purpose so I could give them both some.”
“Your family are good and kind.” I blow out a breath.
“That’s why you should probably return to them.
It’s safe now in the human district. My people are left there to guard it, and there’s enough food now and new seeds to plant for the coming spring.
No one is going to starve. The sea is also part of the shadow barrier around the district now, so fishing shouldn’t be an issue.
If there are any problems, that’s what the guards are there for.
” I look at Illyia and, whoa, she is angry.
“No.” She shakes her head. “I…I don’t belong there and, to be honest, I haven’t in a long time. I owe you my life, Meredith, and I know I am meant to be at your side. I’m not Tannith, but I have your back and I know you well. Please don’t send me away.”
My shoulders drop. “I’m not making you do anything, Illy. I just want you to be prepared that every step I take is dangerous. Just coming here is telling every one of those alphas you mean something to me, and they can use you. The only safe place is your home.”
“I don’t want safe.” She shrugs. “I want more…I’ve always felt like I’ve been waiting for more.”
Elizabeth looks at her, and something flashes across her eyes. Maybe an understanding? I’m not sure, but I nod and Illyia sighs in relief. She smiles. “You’re the new leader there and maybe should probably be there too if you need a break from all of the crazy.”
“I didn’t take it over to be a leader, though.” I gnaw on my lip. “And for me, it’s full of ghosts that I don’t want to face.”