Twenty-Six #2
I offer Jen my arm. Together, we follow Franco to the elevators, everything else falling away as we head up to see him.
Franco leads us to Ryan’s room and pauses in the hallway, lowering his voice. “I’ll leave you guys to it. He’s going to need his rest. You can stay as long as you want, but if he starts dozing off, let him.”
Jen and I both nod. Franco gives us a reassuring smile before heading down the hall.
Jen opens the door, and I follow her in, bracing myself.
The beeping and low hum of the machines make my skin crawl.
When I see Ryan—pale, hooked up to IVs, leg propped and bandaged—my heart sinks.
He looks so frail in that hospital bed. But then he grins, eyes shining, and slurs, “Perfffect. There you are.”
Jen snickers, tossing her bag in a chair. “What am I? Chopped liver?”
Ryan shakes his head, slow and loose, like his neck barely works. “No, you’re Shen. Shenny-Shen. Shenny from the block.”
I bark a surprised laugh and Jen groans. “I’ll let that go because you’re injured,” she says, pointing at him.
Ryan just grins, then pats the bed next to his good leg. “Come here, Perfect.”
I glance at Jen, who gestures at the bed, eyes bugging out in mocking exasperation. “Go on. You two have been whining incessantly for each other all afternoon. Sit.”
I sigh, but my chest feels lighter. Crossing to the bed, I sit gently, careful not to jostle him. Ryan gives me my favorite smile—dimples deep, eyes soft—and whispers, “Hi.”
I swallow past the lump in my throat, run my hand through his hair without thinking. “Hi.”
I smooth his hair back, then let my hand fall to the bed by his thigh. Under the sheet, I feel Ryan’s fingers searching for mine. He moves the sheet and laces our hands together, his grip warm and familiar. “My perfect,” he murmurs.
Jen clears her throat. We both look up. “Ryan, how are you—” She cuts herself off, and I can feel her gaze burning into me, eyes wide. “Wait. Is that a tear? Is the Spencer Stark crying?”
I blink, startled, and turn back to Ryan. And then I just break. My voice comes out rough. “You really fucking scared me, Ryan.” A sob rips out of me before I can stop it.
Jen gasps, rushing around the bed to hug me, squeezing tight. Ryan squeezes my hand, thumb rubbing my knuckles. “Spencester, I’m so sorry. I’m okay though.”
I swipe at my eyes, trying to collect myself. “I’m fine. I’m fine. Sorry.”
Jen drags a chair close and plops down, arms crossed, face all business. “So, how long have you two been fucking?”
I groan. Ryan’s face splits into a grin so bright it could power this whole damn hospital. “So good. He fucks me so good.”
Jen gasps, and I pinch the bridge of my nose. “That’s not what she asked, Ryan.”
Ryan shrugs, still grinning and loopy. “Iss true, though.”
Jen leans forward, elbows on her knees, waiting. Then Ryan makes a big C with his thumb and finger, slurring, “Sso thick, too.”
Jen’s eyes widen, then she bursts out laughing, shaking her head. I bury my face in my hands.
When I look up, Jen’s staring at me, waiting. I sigh. “Well, since he’s decided to share—” I gesture toward Ryan, “—we’ve been hooking up for about a year now.”
Jen makes a sound of disbelief. “A year? A whole freaking year?”
I roll my shoulders, bracing for it. “Jen—”
She cuts me off, turning to Ryan. “I knew you’d be a big ol’ bottom.”
Ryan waggles his eyebrows, beaming. “The biggest. You should see how I slut out on Spence’s—”
“Enough,” I interrupt, holding up a hand.
“Ryan, you’re on pain meds and you just went through some serious trauma.
The adrenaline and the drugs are messing with your brain.
Coming out, even to one person, is not something to take lightly.
I don’t want you to wake up tomorrow and decide it was a mistake. I’m not worth—”
Ryan’s eyes snap to mine, suddenly clear and sharp. “Don’t you dare finish that sentence.”
My mouth hangs open, words gone. Jen leans back, looking ready for whatever comes next.
Ryan’s voice is softer, but steady. “It’s Jen. She can be trusted, and frankly, it will be nice to have someone to talk to.”
His eyes linger on mine, and I can’t help wincing, feeling the edge of something unsaid. Ryan’s voice softens even more. “And even if we are just hooking up, don’t ever think you’re not worth it. You’re a precious valuable as far as I’m concerned. Got it?”
I swallow over the insecurities lodged in my throat and simply reply, “Got it.”
Twenty-Six
It Feels So Good
Ryan
Spence may be right, but I can’t find it in myself to care right now.
Maybe it’s the pain meds, but there’s something about going through a traumatic event—it helps you see things with a little more clarity.
When I was lying in the Emergency Room surrounded by the few trainers and coaching staff who came with me to the hospital, no one said the words, but I know they were all thinking about my career and the future of the franchise.
It just reinforced the feeling that my life isn’t my own.
I’m a commodity. To the team. To my father.
I’m very rapidly realizing that I don’t want it anymore.
I’m done with expectations. Done with appearances. Done with hiding.
I’m just… done.
Fingers rub at my arm, tugging me back to the present. Jen’s voice is gentle. “Hey. Where did you go? Are you getting sleepy?”
I shake my head. “No, sorry. Just thinking.”
I glance at Spence. He’s sitting beside my hospital bed, hunched over, fiddling with the sheets like he’s tying knots only he can see.
Jen leans in, eyes bright with mischief. “So, why do you call him Perfect?”
A grin tugs at my lips. “Because he has to have everything just right. Clothes, hair, work. Everything is controlled and perrrrfected.”
Spence scoffs, but there’s no heat to it. I drop my voice.
“But also, because he knows how to fuck me… perfectly.” Spence groans and covers his face with his hands. Jen bursts out laughing, and the sound makes my chest ache in a good way. I think I like sharing this part of me. A lot.
But then I lose my train of thought when Spence looks at me—so softly, so openly—that I almost vanish into the blue of his eyes. We stay like that for a beat too long, silent, staring, and then Jen coughs. “Okayyy. Well, I’m going to head out and give you two some time alone.”
Spence breaks our stare and looks up at her. Jen grabs her bag and slings it over her shoulder. “And don’t worry. I won’t say anything. But I don’t think you’re hiding it as well as you idiots think you are. So maybe consider letting some of the others in.”
I nod, swallowing. Jen leans over and kisses my cheek. “I’ll be back tomorrow. Let me know if I can bring you anything.”
Spence moves to get up, but she puts a hand on his shoulder, stopping him. “Don’t get up.” She squeezes his shoulder, then gives one last wave and disappears out the door, closing it with a soft snick.
The quiet in the room feels different now. I reach over and tap on Spence’s knee, like I’m calling him back from wherever he goes inside his head. He glances at me, brow furrowed.
I point at the sling holding my left leg, which is elevated about a foot off the bed. “What is it? Are you in pain? Should I get a nurse?” he asks, instantly worried.
I shake my head, giving him a crooked smirk. “Yes, can you ask them where we can buy two of these slings. These are pretty handy. Imagine if both my legs were in the air like this, maybe just a little higher—”
He cuts me off, exasperated. “You are unbelievable, you know that?”
I shrug. “I’m just saying. Maybe you should have a couple installed above your bed for me.”
He doesn’t answer, but I catch him eying the contraption, then shifting in his seat, adjusting himself in his shorts.
Yeah, that’s what I thought.
Spence leans over and carefully straightens my pillow behind my head. “Is there anything I can do for you? Do we need to call your family?”
I shake my head. “Nah, I’m good. I had a video call with my sisters before you guys came up. Talked to my mom, too. My dad just texted some bullshit about my future.”
Spence hums. “Okay, well, don’t worry about any of that right now.”
I nod, then glance at him. “Has Anthony talked to the team management yet? They’re going to want to get ahead of this. Where is my agent, anyways?”
Spence’s eyes widen. “Oh shit! Jen and I were so distracted with how you’re doing, we didn’t think to tell you.”
I tilt my head, confused. “Tell me what?”
Spence grins. “Lexi went into labor while we were in the waiting room. Can you believe that?”
My brows shoot up. I can’t help but wriggle a little, sitting up straighter. “Are you kidding? That’s the best news ever. I’m going to be an uncle. Well, best friend uncle. Fruncle?”
Spence rolls his eyes, but he’s smiling when I snap my fingers. “I’m a funcle!”
He pats my thighs through the sheet. “Yes, you are. Anyway, Anthony and Chance are a little preoccupied right now, but I’m sure they’ll be up to see you.”
Then he pulls out his phone to check it and waves it in my direction. “But don’t worry about babies or agents or team management right now, Ryan. I have everything in hand. Is there anything I can get for you right now?”
I tap the dimple in my chin thoughtfully and watch the ways his lips purse. “Can I use the intercom thingy to prank the nurses station and order a large number three with diet coke and a side of nuggies like it’s a drive-through?”
Spence sighs. “That’s a hard no. I can’t believe they gave you an intercom. Are they nuts?”
I pump my brows. “It’s a fancy floor. I’m a VIP, Spence.”
He groans. “Just focus on getting rest. You have a lot of healing ahead of you. In fact, it’s getting late; you should probably just try to get a full night of sleep.”
A sleepy smile spreads across my face. “Yeah, I am getting a little groggy.”
Spence nods. “Good. Close your eyes, get some sleep, and we’ll see what the doctors have to say tomorrow.”
I nod and let my eyes slide shut, then, quietly, “Spence?”
He grips my ankle, gentle but solid, on my good leg. “Yeah, Ry?”
“Will you please stay until I’m asleep?”
“Yeah, Ry.”