Chapter 12 – — Unsigned note found in a former student’s room
Chapter Twelve
“Those who enter the mirror whole do not always emerge that way.”
— Unsigned note found in a former student’s room
I pull on my black sweater and try to tame my mess of red waves in the mirror, but it’s pointless. They do what they want.
After dinner, I told everyone I’d meet them at the Mirror Ceremony. I didn’t feel like going back to Ellavee’s room with her and Lux. I don’t care to hear about Ellavee’s latest conquest or be probed about my relationship with Jace.
Because there’s nothing to tell. At least that’s what I keep saying.
I never wanted to cross that line with him before.
I was afraid it would ruin our friendship, and I was protecting myself because I knew one day he’d leave our small village and go on to do bigger things.
He was always meant for more than Ironfen.
I wasn’t going to be the girl who held him back or who got left behind.
But now we’re both here at Ashwell. Both at the start of something new.
I don’t know how I feel anymore.
It was clear he wanted to kiss me last night. I was so close to letting it happen. Gods, a part of me wanted it so bad I could taste it. I could use the distraction, something good to hold onto when everything else feels crazy right now.
But that’s the problem. It would be a distraction, and Jace deserves more than that.
I love him. I’ve always loved him, and I’m attracted to him. I just don’t know if it’s the right kind of love. The kind that builds something or the kind that ruins everything.
I huff out a breath and shove the thoughts aside. Not tonight.
I grab the map off my desk and squint at the tiny labels, trying to figure out where I’m supposed to be going for the Mirror Ceremony. The location isn’t marked with a name, only a symbol, a circle made of bones beneath the headmaster’s tower.
That’s not ominous at all.
Good thing I threw my cloak over my clothes tonight, because I have to walk most of the way outside, and it’s a full-on snowy blizzard. I pull my hood up over my head and hold the cloak tight around me. The cold bites through anyway.
I’ve been to the headmaster’s tower before, but I find myself once again unsure if I’m going the right way.
Everything looks different in the dark. The buildings blur together, all the same stone and frost-covered arches.
I thought there would be more students around since all years are required to be there tonight, but the paths are empty.
It’s me and the snow and the howling wind.
I quicken my pace and take a shortcut through a small alley between the blood year dormitories.
A prickle runs along my skin, like the feeling of being watched. I glance back.
Nothing. Just darkness and whirls of snow. I pull my hands from my cloak and breathe into them for warmth. I need to keep walking, I must be close.
Something drops down right in front of me.
I cry out and stumble back. A large figure. Giant black wings spread wide for a second before it all vanishes.
He steps toward me, and I hold my breath and take another step back. My spine hits the cold stone wall.
Then he pushes his hood back, and I see his face.
Draven.
So vampires have wings too. His were even larger than Jace’s, if that’s possible. And now they’re gone. They must be manifested with current.
I shake off the thought and stare daggers at him.
“What the fuck, Draven?”
“You should really watch where you walk at night.”
“And you should really stop stalking me.” I cross my arms despite the cold. “People will talk.”
“Let them.”
“What, you want them to think you’re obsessed with me?” My ribs ache from earlier, but I ignore it. “Because this is twice now you’ve gone out of your way to find me alone.”
His eyebrows furrow. “Don’t flatter yourself.”
“Hard not to when you keep showing up.” I push off the wall and take a step closer, tired of being the one backing away. “What is it about me that bothers you so much? That I’m human? That I’m still here? Or that you can’t figure me out?”
He watches me with those amber eyes. Snow catches in his dark hair and melts against his jaw.
“I think I make you nervous,” I say. “I think that’s why you want me gone.”
“You don’t make me anything.”
“Prove it. Leave me alone.”
He leans in close enough that I can feel the cold radiating off him. I catch his scent for the first time. He smells like winter. Cold air and whiskey and something I shouldn’t want to lean into.
I hate that some part of me files it away.
“No.”
A shape emerges from the darkness behind him. Massive black fur and gleaming eyes.
His wolf.
I tense but don’t look away from Draven. I won’t give him that.
“Your dog is showing.”
“He’s not a dog.”
“Could’ve fooled me.”
The wolf growls low in its throat. Draven doesn’t call it off or even glance at it.
“You should be afraid,” he says quietly.
“Of what? You? Your oversized pet?” I force my voice steady even though my heart is slamming against my bruised ribs. “I’ve had much scarier things happen to me. You’re going to have to try harder.”
“This isn’t a joke, Maelis.” His shoulders square. “Being a Veilguard requires great sacrifice. You don’t even know what sacrifice is in your small human life. You don’t belong here, and you’re going to get someone killed if you don’t die first.”
He presses his hand against the wall above my head, peering down at me. I really need to start carrying a weapon around this place.
“You don’t know me.” I stare right back up at him even though my pulse is racing. “I know what sacrifice is, but I don’t need to explain any of that to you. Get out of my way, Draven. I’m going to be late.”
I don’t want to argue with him. I’m tired of these threats.
“Humans don’t get eidolons. You’re useless here.
” His amber eyes start to bleed red at the edges.
So that’s what a vampire looks like when they’re really angry.
Good, let him be angry. “You froze during the autopsy. You froze on the field today. And you’re going to freeze again when it matters, when it’s someone’s life on the line.
” His eyes bore into mine. “Maybe the mirror will save us all from your incompetence tonight and you won’t make it back out. ”
He pushes off the wall and starts to walk away.
I stand there for a moment, catching my breath. Hands shaking at my sides.
“Fuck you, Draven,” I yell it at his back, wishing I had something clever to say that could hurt him. “I’m going to the ceremony.”
He doesn’t turn around.
“Your death wish.”
And then he’s gone, swallowed by the dark blizzard beyond the alleyway.
I stand there, his voice echoing in my head.
But he doesn’t get to decide how my story ends.
I kick the pile of snow in front of me, my face heating despite the cold.
I don’t know why he’s got it up his ass to come after me.
Our team won the stupid keys. I may have frozen when it was my turn to cut, but I helped our team win.
I don’t know what I did to make him hate me this much, but he’s not going to scare me into leaving.
He thinks I’m soft because I’m human. He doesn’t understand that soft things learn to survive in ways hard things never have to.
I don’t scare easily, and I don’t fucking quit.
“Hey, I was starting to worry about you,” Jace says, hurrying toward me.
He opens his cloak and pulls me into him, his arm and wing folding around me like my own personal cocoon of warmth and safety. I sink into it without thinking.
“You didn’t have to wait up here for me.” I peek up at him, and he shakes his head.
“Lux and Ellavee are nice, but they’re a lot to be around for long periods of time,” he groans. “Especially without you.”
I giggle, glad he can still make me laugh after the day I’ve had.
I stay bundled up next to Jace as he leads us along with a handful of other students down a long, winding stairwell.
We started in the headmaster’s tower, but now we are deep beneath it, winding down until the air thins and the walls change from normal interior stone to something colder and rougher, a cave carved out of the earth centuries ago.
“This isn’t creepy at all,” I whisper.
“There’s so much current down here.” He leans down near my ear. “I wish you could feel it.”
I want to ask him to describe it, but we reach the bottom, and the words die in my throat.
The entire space opens into a massive cavern, not a claustrophobic underground chamber but something gigantic and ancient.
The ceiling disappears into darkness overhead, so high I can’t see where it ends.
There are no seats down here, just a giant room with walls lined in torches, all of them alive with fire.
All except three across from us in the distance.
Those burn different colors. Amethyst. Crimson. Icy blue.
Bone. Blood. Breath.
Below the colored torches must be the mirror everyone’s been talking about. It’s covered with a black drape, and as large as I expected it to be.
“I see Lux’s pink hair. Come on.” Jace pulls me through the crowd of students and faculty.
Everyone really is here tonight.
I spot Draven as we pass by. His gaze locks on mine then flicks up to Jace. Something hard passes through his expression before he looks away. I don’t think Jace notices him at all.
Gods, it’s not fair that all the vampires are so hot, especially that fucking jerk.
We reach Lux and Ellavee, and Jace unwraps me but keeps his arm around my shoulder. I don’t fight it and don’t care what Ellavee thinks. He’s warm, and it feels good to be like this with him.
The room is quiet. I can hear the faint drip of water somewhere in the distance. The air smells of damp earth and something else I can’t place. Maybe current has a scent.
Everyone waits.
I don’t know if I should be excited or anxious right now. I’m assuming since I’m human I won’t get an eidolon. It’s a mirror. How scary can this thing be after all?
“Welcome to our annual Mirror Ceremony.” Ashmoor’s voice echoes through the cavern, and I glance up at him through the people around me.