15. Allen #3
It made sense because Jake was a natural protector, and Riley and Kingston gave off signals that cried out for protection. Riley’s sadness made more sense now that Allen knew some of his backstory, but Kingston was still a mystery that he wouldn’t mind unravelling if the ornery man would allow it.
Allen was collecting quite a cluster of broken hockey boys.
“Do you like Kingston the same way you like me?” Allen asked, trying to judge the depth of Jake’s emotions.
Jake pondered—and then shook his head. “Not like you,” he said. “And not like Riley.”
Okay, so Jake wasn’t attracted to the man, but he was comfortable with him.
“And you would be okay if I conjured a miracle, and Riley fell for Kingston?”
Jake’s expression didn’t change. He was so fucking hard to get a read on sometimes.
“As long as they’re with us,” said Jake.
“Explain what with us means,” said Allen, but he had a feeling that he already knew the answer.
The question finally threw Jake out of his comfort zone, and he winced, looking guilty. “With us,” he echoed. “Hanging out, eating meals, going to games, and being close. I don’t want them to fall in love, move away, and forget about us.”
Riley and Jake were an endgame friendship, and Allen knew that nothing would change that. He could say that with confidence, but he understood why the thought of Riley disappearing with any partner bothered Jake.
Allen didn’t think Jake was sexually attracted to Riley and Kingston. He could totally see the four of them entering a platonic relationship if the right conditions were met, and Allen was surprised by how unbothered he was by the thought.
Remembering how adamant he was about having one guy was laughable now that he was contemplating having three of them.
Allen blamed Jake for breaking his stubborn brain, but first—
“I’ll talk to Riley,” said Allen. “Can you make his favourite meal so we can cheer him up after?”
Giving Jake a task would keep him calm, and he knew Riley would appreciate the gesture after Allen awkwardly cornered him.
“Stuffed peppers it is,” said Jake. He took Allen’s hands and raised them to his mouth, brushing his lips against the knuckles. “Please be gentle with him.”
Warmth thrummed in Allen’s chest as he gripped Jake’s hands encouragingly. “I’m not going to out him or pressure him. I just want to talk and see where his head is now that he’s had some time alone.”
Jake appeared content with that explanation, so Allen pressed one last kiss to his mouth before sliding off his lap. He stretched slowly, rolling his shoulders as he braced himself, then made his way toward the small in-home gym where Riley had holed up.
The room was soundproofed, so Allen couldn’t hear the thud of fists on the punching bag until he opened the door to reveal a shirtless, sweating, and furious Riley Evans.
He was beating the life out of the punching bag, his back and arm muscles flexing with every hit he landed. Allen could almost taste the suffocating anger in the air. It was enough to give him a brief pause before he forced his feet forward and entered the room, closing the door behind him.
“Riley?”
Allen knew Riley had heard him, but he showed no signs of stopping his assault on the punching bag any time soon.
Expecting this to take a while, Allen crossed the room to the weight bench where Riley’s hoodie lay abandoned and scooped it up. Tugging it over his head, he settled onto the bench to wait.
As predicted, Riley needed five more minutes of wild punching before he finally slowed with a frustrated growl. It took another minute for him to completely stop and step away from the swinging bag and rip his gloves off.
“Jake sent you in here?” Riley asked, stubbornly keeping his back turned to Allen while he unwrapped his hands.
Allen chuckled and rested his chin on his palm. “I think it’s cute when you assume that Jake can order me around.”
Something in his tone must have triggered Riley into thinking he was in danger because he finally turned and blinked at Allen, his cheeks burning. “Shit, Ally—I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to sound like an asshole.”
Allen considered his next move carefully. He didn’t want to make things worse between Kingston and Riley if Riley wasn’t ready to admit to anything. He was sure Riley would get defensive if he knew that Kingston had called and spilled the tea, which wouldn’t help the situation at all.
But his hesitation flew out the window when Riley’s shoulders slumped, and he gave Allen the saddest, most lip-wobbling frown he had ever seen and said, “I think I fucked up.”
Allen instinctively opened his arms and gestured Riley closer, smiling when Riley crossed the room and collapsed to his knees, shoving his sweaty head into Allen’s stomach.
Allen brushed his fingers through Riley’s damp hair, letting the bigger man wrap his arms around him in a hug without complaint. He cooed and tickled Riley’s ear, tugging the hair on the back of his neck in the way he knew Jake liked when he was upset.
“What’s wrong, Ry?”
Riley shook his head, nuzzling his face deeper into Allen’s stomach. “I’m an idiot.”
Allen wasn’t sure if that’s what he said because it was hard to hear Riley’s muffled voice, but then Riley lifted his chin and repeated himself.
“I’m an idiot. A big one.”
Allen offered him a smile and gently pinched his blotchy cheek. “Talk me through your woes so I can understand.”
Riley’s face turned redder than Allen thought possible, and he let out a pathetic groan and dropped his cheek to Allen’s lap.
“I was doing a good job handling Sloan’s attitude and misread some shit.
Now things are awkward, and I’m pretty sure I hurt his feelings, and he hates me again, so I’m panicking.
He’s been moody, and I think it’s my fault because I gave him the wrong idea—and now all the effort I put into building a friendship with the guy was pointless. ”
Allen was glad that Riley wasn’t looking at him because his face would have given him away. He had been worried that Riley’s anger was a knee-jerk reaction to being kissed by another man, but he seemed more upset by whatever response he had given Kingston.
Riley ‘shut him down hard’ is what Kingston had said. Allen didn’t know what he meant by that, but he knew how to speed up this process now that he felt more secure about Riley’s emotions.
“Kingston called me,” Allen stated, not bothering to tiptoe around the reveal. His heart tripped when Riley’s head shot back up in alarm, and he quickly soothed him by tugging on his dark-blond hair.
“You don’t have to go into detail if you don’t want to,” said Allen. “But if you do—”
“What a jackass,” Riley snapped, his arms clinging tighter around Allen’s body. “I can’t believe he ran to you guys and told on me. I’m going to punch him in his stupid, smug—”
Allen rolled his eyes and huffed.
—annoying, obnoxious, rude—”
“You’re about to run out of adjectives, Riles.”
—attractive, pretty mouth.”
That wasn’t where Allen had expected Riley’s spiral to lead, and a smile tugged at his mouth after the flustered, exasperated confession ended. “Pretty, huh?”
Defeated, Riley dropped his head back onto Allen’s lap and let out a pathetic whimper. “Have you seen his mouth? It’s so fucking distracting. I didn’t realize how much I thought about it until I felt—until he kissed me.”
Allen sent a thank you to whatever god was listening for giving him two awkward bisexual awakenings that he could handle. Things would have gone less smoothly if Riley had shown a toxic reaction to Kingston’s advances, but this was sounding like an easy fix.
“Thought I was straight,” Riley mumbled. “Thought I liked girls, even if I couldn’t find the right one. Then Sloan starts harassing me about who I like and don’t like, accusing me of being in a threesome relationship with you and Jake—”
Valid.
“And I thought he was trying to literally insert himself into your relationship, so I got angry, and then I got angrier because he’s always talking about fucking girls, and it was confusing.
And then when he kissed me, I should have pushed him away, but his lips were soft, and he tasted like mint from the gum we were chewing, and I forgot.
I forgot who we are and what we are, and that’s never happened before?
How is it possible to forget you’re kissing your rival, who is a guy, and not care?
Shouldn’t I be mad instead of feeling guilty for brushing him off? Fuck, Ally—”
“Dude, breathe,” Allen ordered, scuffing Riley by the back of his sticky neck to give him a shake. “If you start hyperventilating, Jake will feel a tingle of foreboding in his asshole and come barging in to save you.”
Riley’s head popped back up. “Oh god, no. He’ll act all pleased because he’s been dropping hints about my preferences for years. Ever since that time we kissed—”
Jesus Christ. Allen needed alcohol. Stat.
“Forget Jake,” said Allen, even though he was struggling to ignore the images of Jake and Riley making out in his head. “Kingston. Let’s talk about him.”
“What about him?” Riley asked, sounding petulant.
He was certainly more guarded than Kingston had been, but Allen wasn’t going to give up. “Why do you feel guilty? You mentioned it during your rant.”
“Oh.” Riley’s expression crumpled, the fight draining out of him as if someone had driven nails through his resolve and left him deflated.
“I regret how I responded to the kiss. It was a dick move to let the kiss go on, and even more awful to kiss him back and then tell him I wasn’t interested while thanking him for feeling safe enough to come out to me. ”
Allen could tell his blood pressure was rising thanks to the pounding in his head and behind his eyes. “Oh my god, Riley.”