Chapter Twenty-Three
Tessa wallowed on her couch the next morning, awakened by the long-held habit instead of an alarm.
She’d visited her dad and brother the night before and broke the news about quitting her job.
Although they’d supported her decision to leave Hello, Marketing, Tessa’s feelings of failure had set in hard.
She drove home reminding herself of all her brother had been through, and that he looked better each time she saw him.
If he had survived multiple life implosions and come out on top, she could surely survive this too.
Devin had even scored two interviews with business owners he’d met on their afternoon out together.
Tessa, on the other hand, hadn’t submitted a single résumé as she’d promised herself she would.
Insecurities she hadn’t realized she had rushed to the surface and stopped her from taking the next step.
What if no one else wanted her, and she’d walked away from her only possible source of income?
What if her quest for a better life had completely wrecked her chances at one?
She pushed the thoughts aside.
Meanwhile, the mental and emotional toll of having no job and no purpose felt astronomical. She hadn’t expected it to be so hard just to get moving, get dressed, or take a shower. For the first time in her life, she found it much easier to become one with the couch.
Tessa hadn’t been this directionless since her middle school summer breaks.
Even then, she typically took on a personal challenge.
Learning to ride a skateboard, for example, or making enough money from her lemonade stand to buy a ten-speed bicycle.
The least her uncooperative body could do was catch up on sleep instead of waking repeatedly during the night, then at 6:00 a.m. for no reason at all.
She had, however, made progress on a book series she’d kept on her to-be-read pile for months.
Though she found it hard to get behind the heroine throwing away her reliable, predictable life to fight the evil dictatorship.
And suddenly the hunky hero was looking like the dunce supporting her crash-and-burn choices.
Tessa stared at her ceiling. She still needed to contact dozens of former clients to explain her absence, so they wouldn’t think she’d abandoned them. That appealed to her even less than showering or getting dressed.
She pulled a pillow over her face and screamed into the fabric.
Her phone rang, and she reached and swatted at the table until her fingertips found the device. A peek at the incoming caller sat her up too quickly, and her head swam.
Grant.
Shit. She’d thought about him a hundred times since leaving Hello, Marketing.
Things had been going well between them, but his texts had stalled the last few days, and she hadn’t reached out either.
There was too much to say. At first, she’d had a ball to attend, then Kate’s ass was caught on camera.
They’d spoken briefly about that the next morning, but life had gone straight downhill from there. Plus, what would he think of her now?
Oh, yeah. He’d think she was a quitter. Which was true.
She dragged a heavy hand over her face, then glanced at the clock before answering. Nearly noon, and she was a hungry, filthy, rotting potato. Complete with cold coffee on the table at her side.
The phone rang again, and her traitorous thumb accepted the call. “Hello?”
“Hey,” he said. “Long time no talk.”
“Sorry about that,” she said. “I’ve just been so—busy.” She cringed at the lie, looking around the unkempt room. Busy transforming into a slug or some kind of taproot vegetable that thrived while buried in dirt.
She stood, and the world tilted. She couldn’t talk to Grant while marinating in her funk. Whenever they spoke or texted, Tessa felt as if he could somehow see her, or maybe see right through her. Either way, she couldn’t sit still. And she needed to eat before she collapsed.
She gathered cast-off napkins, dirty plates, and empty glasses on her way to the kitchen, phone trapped between her ear and shoulder.
“I figured,” he said. “I didn’t want to bother you. How’s he doing?”
Tessa stilled, arms loaded above her sink. “Who?”
“Your brother.” Grant’s tone suggested he felt as confused as she did.
“Oh.” She emptied her hands and leaned against the counter. She’d nearly forgotten that the last time Grant called, Devin arrived for their outing. “Good. He likes his local sponsor. He made friends in his support group, and he’s having fun looking for a full-time job. Thank you for asking.”
“And how are you?”
She opened the refrigerator and sighed. The offerings were just as uninspiring now as they had been this morning. She needed to go grocery shopping. She closed her refrigerator. “I’m fine.”
“Any chance you have some time today to take a look at the other office space?” he asked.
Her eyelids fell shut. “I am so sorry.”
“Any specific reason why?” he asked.
Tessa felt her insides knotting and her shoulders rising toward her ears. “Yes. I should’ve reached out to you sooner. There’s something we need to talk about.”
“This is about your work?”
She grimaced, unable to find the words to say she’d quit only days after signing a contract with him.
“Hmm,” he said, softly, in her silence. “I was afraid of that, and I’m sincerely sorry.”
“You are?”
“Someone from your office called me this morning to say they’re handling my accounts now,” he said. “Initially, I was shocked, but now I just feel terrible.”
Her mouth opened, then snapped shut. Someone called Grant? Were they calling her clients? Panic welled, and she hurried back to the couch.
She knew she should’ve emailed all her clients as soon as she— Former clients, she mentally corrected. She should’ve contacted them immediately instead of waiting for inspiration or the right moment. Now someone was making the calls for her.
She looked longingly toward her pillow, wishing she could scream.
“I have to know,” Grant said. “Are you passing me to another agent because I came on too strong over dinner that night? Was it the kiss? I knew I shouldn’t have done that. It was too much, and I made you uncomfortable.”
“No.” Her thoughts split down the middle as she attempted to log in to her work email and also process his words. “You didn’t.”
“I pushed the envelope,” he rattled on, apology thick in his tone. “You agreed to a professional dinner, but I crossed a line, and I am truly sorry.”
“No,” she repeated.
Her email password failed, and she tried again. The third failure sent a fresh wave of anxiety through her limbs. An error message directed her to contact the Hello, Marketing help desk.
Xavier had revoked access to her work account. She’d waited too long to reach out to her clients, and now she couldn’t. She’d lost her opportunity.
“I want you to know I understand and take full responsibility,” Grant said. “But I can’t express how sorry I am for putting you in a position where you felt it necessary to step away. I would never want to make you, or anyone, ill at ease.”
“Wait. Stop.” She closed her laptop and rubbed angry fingers against her forehead. “You didn’t do anything wrong.”
But she had, and the Hello, Marketing tech department had locked down her email and removed her network access. Standard protocol for security purposes when someone left the office family. Yet the possibility hadn’t even crossed her mind.
Tessa imagined Xavier accessing her contacts, then parceling them out to interns and coworkers. To Peyton.
“I don’t understand,” Grant said. “And I swear I’m not trying to push— Oh my God. I’m being pushy while trying not to be.”
“It wasn’t you,” she assured.
“If I didn’t overstep,” he said, cautiously, “why the change? I thought we were doing great together. I thought we shared a vision.”
“I quit,” Tessa said. “I should’ve called and let you know sooner, and I’m sorry.”
Her stomach roiled. How had she made such a mess of so many things, and in such a short time?
“I’ve got that,” Grant said. “But why? What went wrong?”
She paused, vision blurred with unshed tears. He misunderstood. “I didn’t quit your account,” she said. She’d never intentionally abandon any of her accounts. “I quit my job.”
While those statements were one in the same, it hadn’t felt that way in the moment.
In fact, when she’d told Xavier she quit, it was to draw a line and put a stop to his bullying and Peyton’s cheating.
The full realization that she’d left both her job and clients had hit later, in the elevator.
Now, the fact sat heavy as an anvil on her shoulders.
She’d quit advertising.
“Oh,” he said. “Well, that certainly changes things.”
You’re right about that, she thought. She’d changed everything, and none of it was for the better.
“What are you doing now?” he asked.
“Looking for a job,” she admitted. She needed to get busy on that.
“I meant what are you doing at this moment?” he clarified.
Tessa looked down at herself and groaned. “I’m on my way to take a shower.”
“Have you eaten?”
“No.” Her stomach growled to underscore the problem.
“Let me buy you lunch,” he said. “Whenever you’re ready. Don’t rush. I have plenty of work to keep me busy.”
Tessa shot to her feet once more and hurried to her bathroom on a burst of adrenaline. “Okay.”
“Okay,” he echoed. “Just two friends, sharing a meal and talking a little shop.”
Her hand froze on the bathroom door. “Friends?”
“Coworkers?” Grant guessed. “I don’t know what to call us. I only know I still want you on this project. I like working with you.”
She ignored the pang of nonsensical rejection. Not a date. A working lunch. “I’m not sure that’s possible. You have a contract with Hello, Marketing.”
“I don’t care who you work for,” he said. “I went there looking for you. I made that very clear.”