Chapter 44
Hand in hand, Noah and I walk through the front door of the Italian restaurant, this time with a reservation and request for a back table. Grace, her mother, and her daughter are already seated at the table.
Noah’s grip on my hand gets tighter as we walk toward them.
Grace stands to greet us. She kisses Noah on the cheek and then pulls me in for a hug, stepping between us and forcing Noah to let go of me. She wraps her arm around my shoulder.
“This is my mother, Dorothy and my daughter, Amy,” she says. “This is Emma, Noah’s new girlfriend.”
My breath sticks in my chest until Dorothy reaches up to me and touches my arm. “It’s wonderful to meet you. It’s nice to know this curmudgeon still knows how to be social,” she teases and it’s Noah that laughs first.
He leans in and kisses Dorothy on the cheek. “I’ve been known to win over a person or two.”
“Yeah, you grew on us,” she teases, patting his cheek.
He moves to the open seat next to Grace and pulls it out for me. I sit and he takes the seat next to me, nudging Amy as he sits.
They all fall into easy banter, much like Lily and I do whenever we’re around one another. They have a past—a relationship. It’s enviable.
I didn’t have a relationship with my ex’s family. Hell, I didn’t have a relationship with him either.
We study our menus, order a bottle of wine which Dorothy suggests, and order our food.
Grace rests her hand over mine as the server pours wine into each of our glasses. “I’m so impressed by the event. Did you do all of the planning?”
I know my eyes go wide. “Oh no. I feel as if I’ve actually done so little.”
“She’s also modest,” Noah says. “She’s done more than she thinks.”
His hand comes to my knee under the table and I’m calmed by it and equally worried what everyone else thinks about him doing so, but no one notices.
“The publishing house set up all the venues and have been in town for the better part of three weeks working with the businesses to get everything set up and running,” I say.
“Well, everything we attended today was delightful. I got to meet Olivia Edwards during a romance panel,” she says.
“She’s a favorite. Her book signing is on Sunday at my store.”
Grace’s lips flatten. “I wish we’d be here for it.”
“You’re leaving?” I ask, and I find that the very thought saddens me. I think if given the opportunity, I’d love to spend more time with Grace. I’ve enjoyed getting to know her.
“We leave on Sunday morning. Amy still has classes, but she’s almost to the finish line.” Grace’s eyes light with the love and pride she has for her daughter.
Noah nudges Amy again. “She’s going to graduate and change the world,” he says, and Amy’s cheeks pink.
“I’m going to balance a lot of ledgers,” Amy says.
“The world needs that,” he says, lifting his glass in toast.
“I couldn’t have done it without you,” Amy says, nudging Noah as he had to her.
“Good investment,” he says, and I wonder what all of that means.
When he first mentioned Abby’s family, I thought maybe they casually kept in touch, but did he put Abby’s niece through college?
No big deal is made of what she said, there are just grateful and proud smiles on all of the faces surrounding me.
Maybe this is how he kept that loss of not having his own child in check.
If he made sure Abby’s niece had everything she’d need, like a college education, then he put some good into the world, right?
I mean, I celebrate every win and console every loss with Lily’s kids.
They are my world, just as I assume Amy is Noah’s.
There is a sting that zaps my heart. I wonder how close he is to his sister’s kids and grandkids.
I understand that in my fifties I’m not going to be someone’s first love.
I understand the loss Noah has gone through, having loved and lost Abby.
But a part of me wishes we could go back twenty or thirty years and meet each other again.
Would we have fallen in love? Would we have a family and be celebrating these milestones?
Would we have been too stubborn for one another and never even have considered what could be?
I’ve always been someone who thinks things happen for a reason.
There’s no need to wish I could have something with someone that I’m fairly sure the younger me wouldn’t have fallen for.
After dinner, we walk Abby’s family to their car and watch as they drive toward the hotel. Noah joins our hands and swings them between us.
“I know it’s cold, but what do you say to a walk?” he asks.
“You know that my house or your hotel room has heat. Are you sure you want to do that?”
Noah laughs and lifts my cold fingers to his lips. “You forget what it’s like in New York, don’t you? Besides it’s April.”
“It’s only April first,” I laugh. “And nighttime in the mountains,” I retort.
“I just want to check out the antique store window up the street.”
It’s such a simple request, and I can’t help but want to take this walk with him.
I’m not one to consider someone’s aura, but I swear Noah has one shimmering around him. There’s a lightness in his step, and a smile turning up the corner of his mouth.
Tonight seems to have filled a need in him that I hadn’t yet. And I wonder what Grace would have to say about it—did he seem different to her too?
When we reach the end of the block, we stand in front of the window Noah had mentioned.
I’ve been in the store a handful of times with Julia, who has an old soul and adores antiques. I, on the other hand, I don’t have that same love for old things.
“I’m offended by this window display,” I say as we look inside.
“Why is that?”
“Um, that’s a Cabbage Patch Kid, and there is a set of Donny and Marie dolls. Oh, and a Michael Jackson Thriller poster?”
That has Noah laughing a joyful laugh I’ve never heard. “You don’t like it because you had those toys, didn’t you?”
When I turn to face him, there is a lightness to him. It’s infectious and I feel it in my soul.
“My toys are in an antique store,” I reiterate.
“Have you listened to classic rock stations on the radio? It’s all eighties.”
“You’re depressing me,” I say heavily.
“No, depressing is knowing that the eighties was almost fifty years ago.”
“Are you trying to harm my self-esteem?”
His smile widens as he looks back at the window that has a help wanted sign and a for sale sign. I don’t know the owners of the store, but I wonder if it’s a need for employees in order to not sell the store, or if there’s another story.
“Do you antique?” I ask him as I watch his eyes shift from item to item.
“I appreciate antiques. I don’t collect them. But my parents love antiques. My mother’s dream was always to own an antique store.”
“Why didn’t she?”
Noah shrugs. “Rent in New York is ridiculous. Then my dad got sick for a long time and she took care of him. Then he retired.” He blows out a long breath. “Then Abby died and she took care of me.”
I squeeze his hand so he knows I’m there feeling all his feels.
“How did she take care of you?”
He bats his eyes, and I wonder how we’ve gone from looking in this window that seemed to give him so much joy to him batting away tears.
“I was broken. Really broken. I couldn’t eat.
I couldn’t get out of bed. My mom cooked for me.
Cleaned my house. I think a few times she read what I’d written, edited it, and wrote ideas in the margins just to keep me working.
She’s a caretaker, my mother,” he says and his voice lifts in admiration for her.
“She sounds wonderful.”
“She is. I can’t wait for her to meet you,” he says finally looking me in the eye.
This is where I’d shake off his comments and remember that he’s leaving me in a few days, but not now. Not when he’s given me such a compliment like wanting me to meet his mother.
I don’t know what’s to come, no matter what we’ve agreed to, but this moment will live with me forever. This man, the one who appreciates antiques—including our childhood toys—thinks enough of me to share these moments with. This will carry me along for a very long time.