Chapter 12 Getting out of line
Getting out of line
Aurora
Have you ever heard the saying: when it rains, it pours? Well, it’s been pretty damp in my life from the get-go, but the last five years have flooded me, leaving rust and soggy walls in their wake.
But a good thing about soggy walls? They can be replaced with new beams and drywall, or better yet, bricks. And the rust? Well, baking soda, white vinegar, and all the rest of the remedies to your rescue as they come to mind, because every morning when I wake up, I polish my armor and go to war.
Today, I had to don on a few extra layers after receiving a letter from Dad’s insurance that they are sorry to inform him, his new medications will not be covered.
Yeah, they’re sorry…so freaking sorry.
I was planning to use the money I had saved up to take Emett to Boston, to see some professional trainers, but now that idea will have to be pushed to the back burner.
I take a deep breath, willing the tears gathering behind my lids to disappear.
It’d be easy to succumb to the rain. So easy to crumble in the puddle of my never-ending problems. And I want to.
Some days I so desperately want to just fall, crumble, and let the current take me.
But I won’t let it. I have someone to live for.
And I’ll be damned if I let my son get all flooded too, or even damp.
Not on my watch.
“Your order is up, Rory,” Jensen hollers from the kitchen window as I finish putting in another order into the system. My fingers are flying over the screen while my feet are already moving toward the dishes, and my mind is adding up which tables need what drinks.
It’s always busy during dinnertime at Blade’s, as it is during every other time of the day, but I mostly work evening shifts here, and honestly, the busier the better. It’s killing two birds with one stone, and all that.
A, the tips are usually more than enough to make up for running ragged.
However, it’s B that continues to make me happy because B is being too busy to allow my mind to think about the million and one problems I have to deal with outside these doors…
like where to find an extra dollar to fix the leak in the roof when we’re already in the negative.
Or figuring out who paid for our window repair because it wasn’t Stella or Electra, I checked.
It’s too busy to drown in guilt and feelings of failure and participate in my favorite Olympic sport of self-doubt and shame or plague me with thoughts like, I’m not good enough. I don’t spend enough time with my kid. And more along the same lines.
It’s the time when I can just be the nice waitress who will give the tourists all the good recommendations and places they need to visit.
And for the past week, it’s the perfect distraction to not think about the most beautiful yet haunting golden eyes attached to a complete asshole. Fine, he might not be an asshole but I’d like to stick to that idea.
Just the mere thought of him sends a rush of wind down my spine.
Stupid, stupid, Aurora.
Hastily, and now annoyed with myself, I click in all the orders and head for the window.
“Thank you,” I call back, grabbing four plates in my arms and storming off to the corner table, setting each dish in front of the guests.
“Here’s your order. Enjoy and let me know if I can get you anything else.” I shoot them a sweet smile that everyone buys as genuine when it’s nothing more than years of practice pulling my muscles around my lips up. I’ve gotten so good at it even I believe it most days.
“This looks amazing, thank you,” one of the guys says with a nod before digging in.
I wander away, strolling through my section, refilling drinks when needed, cleaning up spills, grabbing extra napkins, straws or “that one special sauce you had that one time.”
I still have a few hours left in my shift, but mentally, I’m already home, taking a hot shower, and cuddling with my baby.
It’s as if I’ve conjured him up from my mind, I hear that sweet voice calling out, “Mommy!” as he runs through the bar.
“Hey, you.” I bend down to catch him and twirl him around in a hug. “What are you doing here?” I ask, planting a smooch on his cheek.
Gosh, how many more years I’ll be able to get away with that before he tells me I’m embarrassing him?
“Nana said I need to come hang out with you for a little bit,” he says just before Stella appears.
“Emett, if you’re planning to send me to an early grave, you’re going to succeed.” She plants her fists on her waist.
“Sorry, Grandma,” he says sheepishly, his tone full of guilt. “I just got too excited about seeing mom.”
“Let me guess, you ran across the street again?” I arch an eyebrow.
“I promise, I checked for cars. I really, really did.” He bulges his eyes all innocently at me. My son has a reckless streak in him and none of us know where it came from.
If I wasn’t there when he was born, I’d think he was switched at birth.
“Uh-huh, sure you did.” Stella pins him with a look but it’s never quite as intimidating as it is with all of her students and turns to me.
“Sorry, I’m dropping him off with you before the end of your shift, but I have to make a run to Boston.
I just found out there’s this surgeon there right now for a conference and I need to catch him before he leaves. I’d like for him to see Electra.”
“Do you think he can help?” I ask, hopeful.
“At this point, I’m willing to try anything. Not that I think she needs that kind of doctor, but it’s worth a shot. I’ve called the nurse back, she’s there with Seth.”
“Thank you. And of course, it is! Go!” All of us—apart from Electra herself—are willing to do whatever it took to get her walking again. “Call me if you’ll have any news,” I call out as Stella disappears with a wave back.
I look down at my son, who’s bouncing up and down beside me. “Okay, I’ve got another couple of hours in my shift. Do you think you could color a few placemats for me?”
It’s not often, but from time-to-time Emett hangs out with me while I work, so I’ve come up with a few ideas for him to kill some time. It’s not ideal, but it’s also my life, so what else do we expect?
He nods eagerly and climbs onto the last barstool at the very edge of the bar that he claimed as his own a while back, setting Kevin the police bear right next to him.
Liam, the bartender and the owner’s grandson, fist pumps Emett right away, setting a glass of cranberry juice in front of him. My son’s favorite.
Liam, Electra, and I all went to school together.
He’s actually the one who helped me get the job here when my life fell apart.
He’s good looking with a short buzz cut and muscular body, but he’s never been anything more than a friend, seeing as I was hung up on Joey at that time and he was hung up on Electra.
“Hey, bud, are you keeping me company today?” Liam asks Emett.
“Yep. Uncle Liam, there was an Outlaws game earlier today, can you turn it on?”
I roll my eyes as Liam chuckles, picking up the remote. “You know I always got you, bud. Recorded it just for you.”
“You know…it’ll save you a lot of time if you just skip to the end.” My limbs freeze. My heart skips a beat at the sound of that voice.
“Mr. Brick!” Emett shouts, jumping out of his seat and I turn around in time to see a smile so wide on Severin’s face, it shoots right through my heart as he catches my son and lifts him up in his arms. “You’re here and on TV, that’s so cool!”
He’s just as beautiful as he was last week in his expensive clothes, with the only exception being that scuff on his face. It’s thicker and longer tonight. Even from a few feet, his warm scent wraps around me, drawing me like a stupid moth to a dangerous flame.
And then there’s me. In my serving uniform and a messy ponytail with my hair flying out of it in every direction.
“Mm-hmm, the coolest.” Severin keeps the smile going until it meets me and dies, instead his lips thin out as he sets his mysterious gaze on me. “Aurora.” He tips his head in greeting.
That smooth voice of his stirs a whole storm inside me.
I could’ve sworn I’d never see him again, yet here he was, standing in the middle of Blade’s, holding my son and greeting me as if I was on his mind as much as he was on mine with the only difference that his reflect that confusion and dislike.
“What are you doing here? Did you come to see Mr. Axe? I don’t think he’s here tonight.
Is he, Mommy? I was looking for Mr. Axe too!
I wanted to call you and say thank you for my bears!
But Mommy doesn’t have your number and she couldn’t take me to see Mr. Axe, but I really love the bears!
” He fires off rapidly. “You got me soooo many! That was silly.” Emett giggles.
“Mommy, fast, give me your phone, we need to get Mr. Brick’s number! ”
“Well, he’s here now, baby, so you can just thank him in person, right?” Emett seems to think my words over.
“Yeah, I guess I can. Thank you, Mr. Brick that was the bestest surprise ever!”
Severin clears his throat. “You’re welcome, little man. Was it the right one?”
“Nope, but I love him even more! Oops.” Emett clamps a palm over his mouth and whispers, “You don’t think my old Kevin the police bear can hear me up in bear heaven, do you?”
“I think you’re safe, honey,” I tell him.
“Phew! So, what are you doing here?”
“I actually came to see you…” He pauses, his eyes finding mine. “And your mom,” he tells Emett, and my son’s face lights up like a thousand Christmas trees but mine freezes.
“Really?”
“Really.”
“But why?” Emett frowns and then smiles again. “Did you want to play hockey with me again?”
“Emett,” I warn. “Not everything is about hockey.”
“Um, yes, it is, Mommy.”
Severin chuckles. “You know…I don’t think hockey likes me all that much these days.”
“Yes, it does!” Emett protests. “Everyone loses from time to time, that’s okay! You just need to learn from your mistakes and do better next time. Right, Mommy?”