MILA
Icame so hard that I almost passed out. Feeling Lev so deep inside me, making me so full and stretched, was an experience I had given up on ever having.
I never imagined having an orgasm. Stuck in this existence of contracted servitude, I never thought I’d be in the position to allow myself the vulnerability to embrace something so profound as that.
As I lay here under the bulk of his hot weight on top of me, the cushion of the sparring mat at my back, I caught my breath and slowly came back down from the high. The elation. That soulful goodness of such an intense relief.
He had asked me what I wanted then set about tricking me into thinking that it mattered. All so he could fuck me senseless.
On the heels of that bitterness that swept back as rational thought returned to me, I struggled to accept that version of reality.
He had fucked me senseless. He had made me feel like I mattered with the grip of his hand on mine and the utter heat and passion in his eyes as he watched me writhe beneath him and take his dick.
But I couldn’t be sure whether it was a trick or not.
The only other time a man had been in me was so long ago that it felt like a distant nightmare.
I recalled how that man had pulled out and left me in the barren desert landscape, though.
Just walked away and left me there with blood and cum dripping out of my body, an ache and terror ripping up my heart.
The only devastation I felt now was the pressure of Lev’s cock inside me, stretching me, but not to the point of discomfort. The only raw ache I could sense here was the friction of his beard against my face from kissing me so hungrily.
This wasn’t the same.
Lev wasn’t that nasty man five times my age who’d raped me under the desert sky, the sun burning so hot and fiercely like it too was judging me for being a filthy girl, used and discarded and never the same again.
“Fuck.” Lev moaned as he leaned up to face me. “I doubt you’re going to tell me that you want me to crush you and not let you breathe.”
Before I could find a reply, he snaked his arm around me and did the opposite. He pulled me to him as he lowered and kissed me. Once. Hard and hot, but not with that same race to come.
Then he slipped out of me and got up.
Don’t panic.
This isn’t the same.
This isn’t…
I wasn’t sure what this was. Maybe Lev wanted to use me as his personal sex slave, like that old man had when I was first sold to the Cartel?
When I tried to sit up, Lev extended his hand to me. He had yet to pull up his shorts. His dick stood erect, so long and thick and shiny from our juices. Unashamed to let me look, unhurried since no one else was here, he waited for me to take his hand.
He furrowed his brow as I hesitated to get up. “If you’re getting it in your head to try to pull me back down to the mat and pin me, I’ll make more of a mess.”
I shook my head, taking his hand. “I have no idea what’s going on in my head.”
I was so stupid to cave like that.
I was shocked that it could even feel like that.
I was horrified with how lost and clueless I was now.
Feeling horrified to be this naked and with his cum dripping down the insides of my thighs, I scanned for where I could go.
Where the bathroom was, because nothing looked familiar.
Nothing felt familiar. Like I’d been transplanted into a new person, one who’d gone from hell to heaven, I was dazed and confused.
As I reached down to pull my shorts and panties back up from where they were tangled on one ankle, he used one hand to tug his T-shirt off.
He wiped his dick with it, but then he handed it to me.
“Hold on. Clean up first. The best you can, at least. I don’t think you want to shower here. ”
I numbly took his shirt but dropped it, so bewildered. He tucked himself back into his shorts and picked it up. “Easy, Mila. I see the panic in your eyes.”
“Is that what it is?” I asked as he stepped closer and gently wiped the dry part of his shirt between my legs. I shook on my knees as he touched what was so sensitive from his brutal pounding that felt like magic.
“Panic, regret? I don’t know.” He paused, his fingers on my side. “Fuck…”
I swallowed hard and balanced myself with a hand on his chest. What? What now? What did I do? What do I do?
“This belongs in here,” he whispered. His head hung down, almost like he wanted to kiss me as he shoved his finger into my body, like he wanted to push his cum back into it.
I sagged against him as I hissed.
“Sensitive?” he guessed with a wry laugh, withdrawing his finger and wiping my thigh.
I frowned at him, annoyed that he’d asked like it was funny. Nothing about this was funny. And nothing about what just happened was anything I had experience with.
He bought me.
He owned me.
Yet, now, he wanted to be almost playful after fucking me?
He sighed, balling up the shirt and holding it as he waited for me to tug my clothes back on. Then without a word, he glanced around the empty training facility. “That’s probably enough for now.”
I jerked my head up from tugging my shorts back on fully.
What?
That is probably enough for now? One time of having sex with me hit the spot? Because I wanted more of that delicious heat drowning out my thoughts.
He wasn’t sure if he’d want me again?
For now? I shivered with anticipation for how I’d be able to withstand him doing that to me again.
He raised his brows at me. “Training,” he clarified as he gestured for me to leave with him.
We walked out together, and while the trek back to the safehouse and his home wasn’t that long, silence yawned between us and made me aware of every single second.
Halfway there, I was spared by the buzz of his phone from his pocket.
He answered it with those mono-syllable words and grunts or sounds that showed he was listening.
It was another way he was careful not to say anything around me.
It didn’t matter. With him preoccupied and me so bewildered about how to even act around him, I hurried toward the safehouse and hurried to shower before lying in bed.
Come morning, my head was still a mess.
My pussy still ached.
And I slumped my head against the pillows with the restlessness that would only come from having wickedly naughty dreams about the man who owned the contract to my life.
“I guess I can stop wondering if he’s interested,” I muttered as I got up and yawned.
His eagerness to fuck me proved where he stood on that matter. While I wanted to gloat and smile at having the attention of someone like Lev Volkov, I was still torn about how to behave around him now.
There wasn’t any time to delay facing the aftermath.
He’d expect me for breakfast, and I knew better than to not be present wherever I was ordered to be.
I headed over to his house, almost looking forward to a good, hard run or something physically taxing. But instead of a “usual” morning of eating breakfast then having the entertainment of maybe a ten-word conversation with Selma, I was greeted by Carina.
I blinked, rearing back at the door.
She smiled and turned to yell over her shoulder, “She’s finally here.” To me, she ushered me in. “Sleep in or something?”
I entered Lev’s house, confused. “I’m… ten minutes earlier than when he expects me to show up for work.”
“Work?” She scoffed. “He hasn’t even put you to work yet. But you’ll do well with whatever placement they decide.” She guided me in. “Between you and me, I’m not a delight when I’m hangry, so let’s move it.”
She meant breakfast. A family breakfast, because it was apparently Lev’s birthday and the breakfast was tradition.
It was a sweet thought. I had stopped fantasizing about being a part of a family years ago, but I imagined this was how it was.
With family members joining to eat. To be together not only for business, like the Volkovs were, but also in peace and to have good times.
Still doesn’t explain why they were waiting for me, I mused as I finished my fruit dish.
While it was confusing that Lev wouldn’t have me start my day as usual at the training facility or under Roman’s guidance, this was an easier break from spending the morning with him. I was still just as torn about how to act around him with what happened last night.
Having the Volkov family here kept it busy enough that I went unnoticed.
At least, I went unnoticed by the rest of them. Lev, however, failed to mask how often he watched me. Each time I glanced up and registered his gaze on me, I lowered my head and tried to preoccupy myself with something on the table.
Eventually, they all left. Lev remained, though, and I felt like I’d snap under the pressure of his stare on me.
“Say something, Mila.”
I swallowed hard, unsure about letting him have that piece of me, to be allowed into my thoughts. “I’m not a guest.”
He raised his brows. “Who said you were?”
Ouch. Really fucking ouch. But I couldn’t hate him for saying it. I needed that reality check.
“What do you expect of me, having me eat with them?”
He shrugged, beckoning his finger for me to get up and come to him.
Once I stood next to him, he slid his plate aside and moved me to stand in front of him, my ass against the edge of the table.
“It felt natural for you to be here. To celebrate my birthday.” A sexy, roguish smile changed his face as he stood.
Without any explanation, he lifted me and set me on the edge of the table.
“Happy birthday,” I stated.
He smirked, leaning into my space. His hands rested at either side of my ass and his face was inches from mine.
“Thanks.”
“I wasn’t aware that I should’ve been prepared for it.”
He straightened, setting his hands on my thighs and urging them apart so he could stand between them.
Oh, fuck.
What’s going on?
What are you doing?
I couldn’t ask. He’d hear the desperation in my voice.
“If you had known it was my birthday, would you have wanted to give me a gift?”