22. Roman
ROMAN
Ipinch the bridge of my nose. Being tangled up in Fae feels like a lifetime ago, even though it has only been a few hours. The absence of her sits wrong under my skin, a constant pull I can’t ignore. I grit my teeth against the headache building behind my eyes. It refuses to ease.
The element of surprise is gone. I knew it the second my father called last night.
So did the rest of them. Now it feels like I’m chasing something just out of reach, trying to stay one step ahead just to keep Fae, Robyn and my mum safe.
Victor sent one of his men to my Coggeshall house last night.
The report came back at four this morning that the house was empty.
We’ve got eyes on it in case he circles back, but I don’t expect him to.
Not now.
Dad taught me everything I know, which means I understand how he thinks.
He won’t wait to be found. He’ll position himself, control the timing, choose the moment that gives him the advantage and then attack.
It means I don’t get to hesitate. If I let him set the pace, we’re already behind.
It’s reckless, both parties going on the attack, but what can I do?
Felix made it clear he wasn’t happy, but I understand the risk. I know it leaves us exposed, but standing still isn’t protection. It’s permission. If Felix wants to build walls, strengthen the house and lock everything down, he can. I won’t stop him, but I’m taking this to him.
Fuck.
How did it get to this? None of it lines up with the man I thought I knew.
The fact Riggs called it weeks ago sits bitter on my tongue.
I was so focused on pointing the blame anywhere but him that I didn’t even look properly at what was right in front of me.
How does a man go from wiping your tears when you graze a knee to becoming the reason the people you love are in danger?
I lean over the table, bracing my hands against the wood as Atlas works.
The glow from his screens reflects across his face whilst lines of data shift faster than most people could follow.
We’ve been at it for hours. I’ve managed to narrow it down to three safe houses he could be at.
Money is bouncing between so many different places and countries it’s impossible to track cleanly. He’s deliberately muddying the trail.
“That was my guy. The safe house in Kent is empty,” Victor says with a sigh.
“Fuck’s sake,” Riggs mutters from the sofa, flicking his lighter open and closed.
I straighten slowly, dragging a hand across my mouth as I look at the screen again. “Keep eyes on it.”
Victor makes a humming noise in the back of his throat that I’m going to take as yes sir.
“You good, Roman?” Riggs asks and I raise an eyebrow. Out of all the stupid shit Riggs has ever said, this has to be by far the worst.
“I’m peachy,” I deadpan and Riggs flicks the lighter again before glancing up at me.
“You look like shit,” he says with a shrug. “You’re a bit pale. Slightly murdery. It’s not your best look honestly.” I frown at him. “I’m surprised it hasn’t scared Fae off.”
“Careful,” Victor mutters.
“What? It’s just an observation,” Riggs replies. “If he kills me, at least it’ll break the tension in here. Honestly, the stress is making me fucking itch.”
Atlas snorts under his breath, still typing as I exhale slowly. Riggs continues to watch me before he leans back into the sofa.
“Also, if we’re all going to sit here silently spiralling, I’d like to formally opt out. It’s not my vibe.”
“Not your vibe?” I repeat. “You always spiral.”
“No I fucking don’t,” Riggs tuts. “I distract people, Roro. It’s a very different skill set.”
“You distract people because you spiral,” Felix mutters as he walks in, setting a tray of drinks down on the table.
“Exactly,” I say, nodding toward him.
“That is not true,” Riggs snaps, sitting forward like he’s been personally attacked.
“It’s so true that it should be written into The Company’s laws,” Atlas says.
“Could you imagine?” Felix picks up a drink. “Law 3046: when Riggs spirals, let him distract people.”
“Everyone would end up naming their children Riggs,” I cross my arms over my chest.
“I can see it now. Imagine little girls all running around whilst their mum shouts ‘Riggs, don’t cut your sister’s hair!’” Atlas chuckles.
Riggs’ nostrils flare as his eyes bounce between us.
The wild mess of his blonde hair and the look in his eyes sends an inappropriate smile to my lips, and before I can stop it, a laugh breaks out of me.
It catches the others too. Riggs flushes, going almost red before snapping the lighter shut and gripping it in his hand.
“Carry on, fuckers,” he mutters.
“Definitely spiralling,” Atlas adds.
I bark out another laugh as the tension finally shifts, loosening its grip just enough that the headache behind my eyes eases. The sound of footsteps pulls my attention, and I turn as my mum walks into the lounge with Fae and Robyn beside her.
My eyes find Fae immediately.
They move over every mark and bruise still visible against her skin.
My jaw hardens at the memory of us last night.
My beautiful Tink’s back has been destroyed.
It is a patchwork of welts, scars and cuts.
As if the internal damage isn’t enough, she now has something she’s going to carry externally long after this is over.
I hate it.
I hate that I can’t undo it. I hate that I have to look at it and know exactly who allowed it to happen.
She crosses the room toward me and my chest steadies. I lick my teeth as I take her in. She steps straight into me, rising onto her toes and I meet her halfway. My hand comes up automatically as I press a soft kiss to her lips. She smiles into it and everything else fades away.
“Get a room,” Felix barks and I groan as she pulls away and gives me a shy smile.
How does she do that? How does she move so effortlessly between the two?
One minute she’s all sharp edges and quiet danger, a woman who could kill someone without hesitation, and the next she’s soft, almost shy, standing in front of me like something delicate I need to handle carefully.
It should feel like a contradiction. It doesn’t.
Instead, it’s endearing. Her strength. Her softness.
The way she loves without holding back. It’s powerful.
Powerful enough to bring a man to his knees.
I would. Without hesitation.
“Hey, fairy,” Riggs says, and I grind my teeth as she moves toward him.
It was bad enough before she was taken from me.
Now the thought of anyone else touching her sends a sharp pain through my chest. Riggs pulls her down onto his lap and flashes me a smirk over her shoulder.
The fucker knows exactly what he’s doing.
I sigh before crossing the room and pulling her straight out of his arms. She squeaks but wraps her legs around me as I lift her.
“Do I need to remind you how possessive I am, Tink?” I murmur, my voice low against her ear.
“Put her down,” Mum says sharply behind me and I turn to face her as irritation snaps straight to the surface.
“You have no idea what these men do to me,” I shoot back, knowing full well I sound unhinged but not caring enough to stop.
“Me, Roman. Me, caveman,” Riggs says, dropping his voice and thumping his chest.
The room breaks out in collective laughter. Even Atlas cracks, shaking his head as he keeps typing. I frown, looking down at Fae as she bites her bottom lip, clearly trying not to smile.
“It’s true,” she whispers against my ear, and the sensation sends a shiver across my body as blood pumps straight to my cock.
Jesus Christ.
I clear my throat, forcing some control back as I slide her down from my arms. She gasps softly as her feet hit the floor, and I raise an eyebrow, knowing exactly what she felt.
“Punishment later, Tink,” I murmur under my breath. “My mum’s in the room.”
Her pupils blow wide, the green of her eyes almost swallowed completely as her tongue drags across her bottom lip.
“Mmm.” I trace her tongue with my thumb. “Caveman Roman thinks you did this on purpose.”
She fakes a gasp. “Who me? Never,” her voice drops lower, “sir.”
I rub a hand over my face and swallow the groan that wants to come out. Thankfully, people seem to be giving us space, or this would be a very awkward situation. The warmth of her feels amazing as she presses into me and for a moment it almost feels like I can pretend nothing else exists.
The reality of our situation pushes back into my head as I glance down at her.
What happens when she really processes this?
When she stops seeing me as separate from him and realises I’m not?
I can try and tell myself I’m different, but the truth is, I was still raised by him.
I was still shaped by him. My jaw tightens as I look away, dragging my hand down my face.
If she ever looks at me and sees him… I don’t know how I’d come back from that.
A phone pings.
The sound cuts through the room and my head lifts as my eyes snap to my mum whilst she reaches for hers. She checks the screen, her expression shifting just enough for me to notice.
“Was that him? Has he reached out?” I ask, but she shakes her head.
“No, he hasn’t and that was nothing,” her thumb moves across the screen before she looks back towards Robyn.
My attention is drawn to her too. Robyn’s over by the couch collecting her things and I frown.
It’s not necessarily what she’s doing, it’s the way she’s doing it that makes me pause.
Her fingers close around a glass before she sets it back down again, like she forgot why she picked it up in the first place.
Then she reaches for her jacket draped over the arm of the sofa.
The fabric bunches in her grip before she shakes it out harder than necessary and slips it over her shoulders.
“Are you okay?” I ask cautiously as Robyn looks up at me with a frown.
“Me?” she stutters.
Fae untangles herself from me and turns, offering her a small reassuring smile.
Jesus Christ.
She’s broken. She’s not the person I knew before she was taken.
Fae… Fae feels like she came back to me.
Not untouched or unchanged, but still herself beneath it all.
Robyn isn’t. There’s something off in the way she moves and holds herself.
Every time we speak to her, her blue eyes widen just a fraction too much and her voice catches like she doesn’t quite trust it to come out.
“Yeah, Robyn… are you okay?”
“Oh, I’m fine,” she nods too quickly. “I’m just getting ready to go.”
My head tilts. “To go where?”
“Home,” she says with a quiet exhale. “I need my own space. It’s been months.”
Their flat isn’t far from here, but the thought of either of them stepping outside this building makes my stomach turn.
“No.” The word comes out flat and final as Felix rounds on me immediately.
“What do you mean no?” he barks.
“My dad is MIA, Robyn,” I say, ignoring him. I don’t miss the hitch in her breath when I mention him, or the quick nervous glance she throws toward my mum. I exhale slowly. “Look… we just got both of you back.”
“And I’m not a prisoner,” she shoots back, her grip tightening around her coat.
My shoulders drop. Of course she feels like that. After months of being locked up, I’m not surprised. It doesn’t change anything.
“Robyn—” Fae starts, but I cut her off, earning a sharp look.
“You’re not a prisoner,” I nod, glancing briefly at Felix, who’s watching with wide eyes. “You’re right. But my dad…None of us can lose you again.”
“I need my own space,” she whispers as her fingers fidget with the fabric of her coat.
“You can have my room,” Felix says, and I’m grateful he finally sees what I’m saying.
“That’s not the same thing.”
Felix steps forward, “you’re safe here, Nix. Just… a while longer. It’s all we have right now.”
“I just need to have some control again.”
“Then take control when he’s not out there,” I say, pointing toward the door.
“Roman—” Felix shifts beside her.
“I’m not arguing about this,” I cut in before taking a step back. “You don’t leave. None of you do. Not until this is done.”
“That’s not your call,” she snaps.
“Yes,” I say, steady and final as my eyes lock with hers. “It is.”
I hold her gaze before I turn and walk out. I don’t want to say something I can’t take back. The noise behind me dulls as I push into the kitchen. I brace my hands against the counter and drop my head as I drag in a breath that does nothing to take the edge off.
“You don’t get to decide what’s right for her, Roman,” her voice follows me in, and I don’t need to turn to know who it is.
“I’m not deciding anything.”
“Then what was that?”
I let the air out slowly through my nose before pushing off the counter and turning to look at her.
“We have no idea where he is,” I say. “And she somehow thinks going home is safe? That it will what? Fix what he put her through?”
“No, sweet boy,” Mum replies calmly. “She thinks going home will give her her old life back.”
“And if he’s watching?” I ask. “If he’s waiting for exactly that?”
“Then we can deal with it,” she says, like it’s simple.
But it isn’t. None of it is. I look away, my hand pressing flat against the counter as the pressure behind my eyes builds again, sitting heavy and unrelenting as everything stacks on top of itself.
Because this isn’t just about Robyn leaving.
It isn’t even just about her possibly taking Fae with her.
“You can’t control everything, Roman.”
“I’m not trying to control everything,” I say, knowing it’s a lie the second it leaves my mouth.
Her hum is soft and disbelieving.
“Sweet boy… you are.”
“My focus is where it needs to be,” I grit out as she steps closer and raises her hand to rub across my back.
“No,” she replies, calm but firm. “Your focus needs to be you, Fae and the baby. Everything else is noise.”
“And you,” I mutter.
“No,” she says. “Not me.”
I glance at her as a frown pulls at my brow.
“I’m a grown woman. I’ve lived long enough to know what this is,” she says. “I look after you, Roman. Not the other way around. Do you understand me? If something comes for you, and now Fae and that baby, it goes through me first. That’s what being your mother means.”
“Don’t say shit like that, Mum. You know I don’t like it.”
“You don’t need to like it; you need to understand it. I will always choose you. Your father made his choice and I made mine.”
I don’t respond, because if I do it won’t come out right. Instead, I look away as I let what she’s said sit there before I push straight past it. Because she’s wrong. She has to be. I do need to control it. I need to control all of it.
I failed all of them once before.
I’m not doing it again.
Even if it kills me.