Chapter 6
Six
ALLETTE
NOW
“Isn’t this brilliant?” Wynn gushes through purple-stained lips, three empty glasses of mulled wine on the barrel next to her.
I’m only on my second, and my face already feels fuzzy and warm. If only the heat would spread to my extremities. My fingers and toes are frozen solid. “It really is amazing.”
Everything in the human realm is so different. There isn’t one tower in sight; the few clouds hanging in the sky seem so far away; the stars are nothing more than flickering specks. Even the air feels thicker, more fragrant, filled with the savory scent of smoke and roasted meat. But there is sweetness as well. The heady taste of the unknown.
Two young men I recognize from the portal link arms, spinning around next to a bunch of humans. My laugh floats away like a white cloud. So much joy and abandon. Is it always like this down here, or do they only have this much fun on Samhain?
Wynn sighs, her head falling to my right shoulder. “I will dream of this night for the rest of my life. Thank you so much for bringing me with you.”
“I wouldn’t have it any other way.”
“Are you happy?” Senan murmurs against the shell of my other ear, sending a delicious chill down my spine.
“Blissfully so.” The only thing that would make this night better would be if it never ended. “Are you?”
“No, I’m miserable,” he says with a wink, cupping my hands between his and bringing them to his mouth so he can puff warm air against them. I touch my frigid fingertips to his lips, tracing his smile, committing to memory each crease.
What if he falls in love with his princess? Will he come back to me as he promised, or will the key he gave me turn rusty from disuse? Will he give her pieces of himself that he has never given me?
So many questions I’ll never ask because I’m certain I won’t survive the answers.
The serving woman returns with more wine, dragging me out of my darkening thoughts. Senan asks if we’d like another. The closer we get to the end of this three-hour window, the tighter hopelessness grips my chest. I don’t want to ruin what remains of the night by drinking myself into oblivion, so I decline.
Senan buys one for Wynn and himself. After a few sips, he abandons the glass next to the collection of empty ones on the barrel beside us. Then he turns to me and holds out his hand. “Dance with me, Allette.”
How many times have I dreamed of dancing with this prince at a grand ball in the castle or one of their famous masquerades? Even if my aunt and I received an invitation to the castle, I wouldn’t have a hope of getting near Senan, let alone dancing with him.
In Kumulus, princes don’t dance with the daughters of lowly lords.
This may not be a ballroom, but the masked musicians filling the square with a lively reel and all the plain dresses swirling and boisterous laughter makes tonight feel even more magical.
Nervous butterflies take flight in my stomach. “I’d love to but don’t know the steps.” I took a few dancing lessons at the academy but must admit to not being the most studious of pupils.
The right side of his mouth lifts a little higher. “Then we’ll figure them out together.”
How can I argue with that? My hand slips into his, and I let him lead me to an empty spot on the dance floor made of cobblestones and dreams.
Senan’s smile falters when he glances over my shoulder. His guard looms at my back, scowling at the prince from behind his red mask.
Senan swats his shoulder. “You’ll have to wait your turn, you big brute.”
The guard rolls his eyes but returns to the bench to sit next to a grinning Wynn. I’m about to suggest that he should ask my friend to dance when Senan spins me into the fray. We stumble and step on each other’s toes far too many times, but the pain in my feet is nothing compared to the ache in my sides from laughing when Senan decides halfway through the song that I should be the one leading and twirling and dipping him.
By the time the reel ends, I’m breathless and in desperate need of a drink. Senan hands me his glass, and I drain the lot.
Then he offers the guard his hand. The man glares as if it is a serpent.
“Come on.” Senan flutters his fingers. “You know you want to.”
“I’d rather cut out my own eyes,” the guard mutters.
With a smirk, Senan takes two steps to the right and asks Wynn to dance.
“You want to dance with me?” she gasps, clutching her skirts with white knuckles.
“If you’ll allow it,” he says with a courtly bow.
I love him even more for the way he treats her: not as if she is beneath him but as though she is someone worthy of his time. If only other Scathians felt the same. When a handful of my classmates back at school found out I’d befriended a maid, they’d stopped speaking to me altogether.
The moment Wynn vacates the bench, I sink into her spot and ease forward to rub my aching feet. I wouldn’t be surprised if I had a bruise or two come morning thanks to Senan’s “dancing.” If one could even call it that. Thankfully, he appears to be taking it slower with Wynn.
I point my toes toward the crackling fire, wishing I’d packed an extra pair of dry socks. Not that it matters, I suppose, since we all left our packs hidden in the forest near the portal.
The guard watches me with his lips flat.
Even though I don’t say the words aloud, calling him “the guard” feels terribly rude. “What is your name?” I ask.
He blinks at me, seeming startled that I spoke to him. “My name is Eason.”
Eason . That is a nice name. “I hope you don’t mind me saying this, Eason, but you look entirely miserable.”
The corners of his light eyes crinkle ever so slightly. “Not entirely.”
“ Oh, please. You haven’t had one drink.”
“Drink numbs the mind, and I must be alert at all times.”
Fair enough. Although with everyone so merry, I can’t see trouble arising any time soon. Later, perhaps, when folks are deeper in their cups. But we’ll be back in Kumulus by then. The thought leaves my stomach sinking. “What about dancing?” I ask. “You haven’t done that either. Does it numb the mind too?”
His frown deepens. “Dancing is a distraction.”
Isn’t that part of the fun? To revel in a glorious distraction from duties and responsibilities. A brief escape from the doldrums and disappointments of life. I nudge his knee with mine. “What about smiling? Is that forbidden as well?”
His lips twitch into an almost-smile. “No. It’s not.”
Now that we’re sitting so close, he looks a good deal younger than I first thought. Then again, it could be that silly mask. “How old are you, Eason?”
“Twenty-four.”
That is awfully young for a royal guard considering they must train for at least five years and be at the top of their class in the academy to even be considered for a position at the castle. Meaning Eason is either very good or very lucky.
Considering the way the silver leathers cling to his toned form, the fact that his hand rarely moves from the pommel of his sword, and how his gaze always seems to be scanning for trouble, I assume it’s the former.
Senan and Wynn clasp hands and spin in circles with the rest of the dancers. Wynn’s head falls back as she laughs, her eyes closed and cheeks flushed. If only every night could be like this.
“You do realize he is engaged, right?” Eason says, bringing my attention back to him. “I’m not trying to be an ass, but you must know there is no future for the two of you.”
“I do.” And yet, here I am, clinging to these fraying threads of hope as if they can keep me from falling. Am I a fool for wanting a man promised to another? Undoubtedly. Would I be better off trying to open my heart to someone else? Probably.
But the thought of saying goodbye to Senan makes it feel as if the very fabric of my being has been shredded in two.
If I’m destined to break either way, I may as well have some good memories to cling to.
Someone sits down next to me. Expecting to see Senan, I turn and smile. But it isn’t Senan at all.
Lord Windell’s bear mask slips down his thin nose when he gives me a toothy grin. “Allette Rittey. Didn’t think I’d meet you down here.”
If I ever come back to this realm, I’ll need to purchase a mask that covers my entire face so I can hide from unwanted suitors.
The way he runs his tongue along his lips makes me think of a fox eyeing up a bunny. And I know well what Lord Windell does to helpless bunnies. “Might I say, you are looking particularly ravishing in that mask.”
By some miracle, I manage to keep my smile from slipping. “How kind of you to say, Lord Windell.”
“Perhaps you’ll wear it for me after we are wed.”
It’s impossible not to miss the insinuation in his tone. Philip Windell is the last man in the world I would want to tie myself to. Not that I’ll have a choice if he makes an offer of marriage and my aunt decides to accept.
His shoulder presses into mine as he scoots so close, the sour wine on his breath assaults my poor nose. “I’m looking forward to our dinner together tomorrow night. I have another surprise for you.”
I sincerely hope it isn’t another rabbit’s foot. “I can’t wait.”
As if he just noticed Eason’s presence, Philip’s gaze flicks to the guard and then back to me. “Who is this man you’re with?”
That is none of your business . “This is my friend, Eason.”
“Does your friend mind if I steal you away for a dance?” he asks, already reaching for my hand.
“He may not, but I do.” Senan’s deep voice leaves heat burning up my throat.
What is he doing? Philip has been to the castle with his father and might recognize him. Of all the times for Senan to get jealous…
Wynn peers from behind Senan’s shoulder, her eyes wide inside her cat mask.
Lord Windell stands, the top of his head coming to Senan’s chin. “Would you look who it is. Searching for a bit of sport yourself, sire?”
They know each other. Isn’t that lovely? Perhaps Senan will receive an invitation to our bloody wedding.
Senan shoves past Lord Windell and sinks onto the bench beside me. “There is no sport to be found here. I suggest you make yourself scarce.” He sounds so commanding when he uses his “princely” voice. Although he is acting like a haughty prick, part of me secretly loves it.
Lord Windell ignores Senan’s glower as he takes my hand and presses his thin, wet lips to my knuckles. “I’ll see you tomorrow night, Allette.”
Dread climbs my throat, and I have a sinking feeling that Senan has made this whole situation worse.
Wynn squeezes between Eason and me to give my knee a pat. “You all right?”
“I’m wonderful.” But I’m not. I’m really not. Senan may have saved me from Lord Windell tonight, but tomorrow, the prince will be long gone, and I’ll have to deal with the man myself. And if the hungry look he keeps throwing over his shoulder as he stalks toward the bonfire is any indication, he may want to stake his claim sooner rather than later.
Senan turns away before I can gauge his reaction to Philip, waving to a man toting a crate of wool blankets. He pays for two, handing one to Wynn before draping the second over our legs.
Wynn unfolds the blanket with a happy little hum. “Normally, I don’t accept gifts from gentlemen, but since you’ve broken all my toes, I think it’s the least you can do.”
“That it is,” Senan agrees, his tone light and jovial but his smile brittle. Beneath the cover, his hand curls around mine.
“You forgot to get one for Eason,” I remind him.
Behind his black mask, Senan’s eyes narrow. “Who?”
“Eason. Your guard.”
“I don’t mind sharing with him.” Wynn throws a corner of her blanket across Eason’s lap before he can protest. Although the guard doesn’t look pleased, he doesn’t refuse either.
Senan’s long, thick fingers squeeze mine as he watches me through his mask. When his gaze drops to my lips, my heart kicks up speed. He cannot kiss me in front of all these people, I know that. But stars, do I want him to.
“Was he the bunny killer?” Senan whispers, his expression as serious as I’ve ever seen it.
As much as I want to deny it, I nod.
The prince’s nostrils flare, and his jaw pulses. “I’m going to kill him.”
“Simon…”
He blows out a harsh breath; his head falls as he stretches out his legs and lets out a mirthless chuckle.
Eason’s words drift through my mind. You do know he is engaged…
How silly the guard must think I am. How na?ve.
As I peer up at Senan, I wonder if we’re only making this harder on ourselves. Every moment we spend together will make saying goodbye that much more difficult. Why are we holding on when it’s only a matter of time before the world forces us to let go?
I slip my fingers free of his grasp. “Senan, we need to talk.”
His head jerks up, and his eyes fly to mine. As if he can hear the direction of my morbid thoughts, he starts shaking his head. “The last thing I want to do is talk.”
That really is too bad because I have things to say—things we both need to hear. “We cannot keep seeing each other?—”
He captures my fingers once more, clinging even tighter than before. “Don’t do this tonight. Please. Just give me one more night.”
How can I deny him when he holds my heart? “One more night.” Reality will come with the dawn. Tomorrow, I’ll be stronger. Tomorrow, I’ll keep myself from falling deeper under the spell of his hypnotic silver eyes.
Tomorrow.
Senan tosses the blanket aside, stands, and pulls me to my feet. His voice trembles when he asks me for one final dance.
This feels like more than a dance.
This feels like goodbye.
With my eyes still burning, I pray this isn’t the last time Senan’s free arm snakes around my waist. The last time he draws me against his firm side. The last time he holds me in his arms.
A crowd fills in around us, but all I can see is Senan. The music begins, soft and whimsical, like the memory of a beautiful summer’s day. But every summer has an ending.
And tonight is ours.
Suddenly, Senan stops and grumbles, “Bloody boots,” before taking a knee on the stones. I tap my fingers against my thighs, waiting for him to tie his laces. When his warm fingers clasp my wrist and he tugs me down next to him, I have to brace myself against his shoulders to keep from toppling over.
I’m about to ask what he’s doing when he withdraws a small white object from inside his coat. A mask. He presses it into my palm. Why do I need another mask when I already have one?
“Put it on,” he whispers, replacing his crow mask with a white one as well. “Hurry.”
I trade masks, and he tucks mine inside his coat with his own. “Why? Is everything all right?”
The intensity of his gaze steals my breath as he draws his hood over his glamoured hair. His fingers lock around mine, and he urges me to my feet. The twirling couples around us become a blur of color and motion.
When I say his name again, Senan’s gaze collides with mine. “We need to run.”