Chapter 25
CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE
ABBY
I break our kiss all too soon when I become aware of all the eyes on us. “It seems they’re eager for some instruction,” I say, flushing under the weight of those stares. This is the first time these eyes have held anything other than contempt for Quinn, and pride swells in my chest. He deserves to be accepted. After all, he’s one of them.
“We can start tomorrow.” When I take a step back, his face falls. “Is this too much? Are we not okay?”
I give him what I hope is a reassuring smile. “No, it’s not that. I’m just supposed to be meeting Teagan for a lesson of my own.” I’m actually not sure if I am, but we’ve been meeting around this time every day and the only days we haven’t met were when I was away from the city.
The smile must have worked because he relaxes with an expelled of breath. “Then you better not keep her waiting. Have fun.”
I glance behind him to the crowd of waiting sirens. “You too. Try not to bleed out any more than you already are.”
“They won’t even touch me.” He kisses my cheek and then jogs back to his new fans. Some of Quinn’s people have joined now too, but they don’t seem to be protecting him. They seem just as eager to learn from him, even if they likely have before. Quinn was trained to lead an army against Lunae. Most of that army was destroyed when he was cursed and he went on a killing spree, but with the people of Marein, he’ll soon have his army again.
We’re actually doing this. We’re going to bring the fight to Lunae. I’m going to get my sister out of there and give her a real chance to find herself without Imelda’s overbearing thumb pressing down on her.
I watch Quinn for a while, too distracted by him to move for the water in search of Teagan. He’s totally in his element like this. It’s as if he was not only raised for it, he was born for it. He may not have wanted to be king, but it’s impossible to look at him now and not believe that he was born to lead. Born to teach.
I wish it was as clear what my place in this world is.
When his opponent’s sword gets a little too close to Quinn, I force myself to turn away. I know he meant what he said about not letting a single one of them touch him, but he enjoys the close calls too much. I’d rather not force myself to endure the heart palpitations that are a sorry side effect of watching him fight.
I move for the water and spot Teagan almost instantly—but she’s not alone, and this time it isn’t Petra she’s speaking with.
It’s Jade.
He’s standing well back from the water and there’s a tenseness to his body, but aside from that, they seem to be talking with relative ease. I can’t help but wonder if he must understand some of the sirens’ language of signs as well. He was born here and even though he was stolen from here at the age of five and has since lost his memories, perhaps something from his early life stuck.
I consider heading back to the beach, but Jade suddenly pivots on his heel and begins striding in my direction. Our eyes meet only briefly as he passes me, and as if he can’t get away from me fast enough, he summons his wings and launches into the sky. It only takes a moment to lose sight of him in the blinding sun shining down above us.
“What was that about?” I ask when I reach Teagan. As much as I hate it, I’m a little annoyed. He can’t be friendly to me one moment and then hate me the next.
Teagan shakes her head as if she too thinks he’s being ridiculous and then points a finger at me.
I sigh and take a seat on the rock ledge in front of her. “Of course he was talking about me. I bet he had nothing nice to say.”
She makes a gesture that I recognize as the word ‘question.’
“He was asking about me?” I don’t see how that’s all that different. As long as he wasn’t asking for advice on the best way to kill me, I probably don’t have to worry.
Teagan nods and reaches a webbed hand behind her until it touches her back.
“Asking about my scars?” I guess that makes sense. He’d hoped that seeing them would bring back some of his memories, and honestly, I did too. I loved him once and even though I feel nothing close to that now, part of me misses him.
Teagan nods again but then makes the gesture for ‘more.’ Understanding her has gotten significantly easier, but it’s moments like this where I wish she could speak or that Petra was nearby to translate.
I make the best guess I can. “About everything that happened in Lunae? Our history?” I can’t think of anything else related to my scars that Jade would want to know. Either way, he could just ask me. He and Teagan were friends of convenience once, since he wanted to get close to me and she was acting as the dragons’ spy while remaining my closest—and only—friend.
Another nod. Gods, how I miss her voice. It’s her advice I need right now.
“I don’t know what to do about him. One minute he looks like he wants to kill me, and the next he’s helping me.” I hold up my left hand without thinking, but lower it quickly when Teagan gasps. I didn’t mean to spring that on her, but even with the constant dull ache, I’d nearly forgotten.
Teagan holds out a hand and I know it’s because she wants to get a better look at mine, but I’d rather she just forget she saw it.
“It looks worse than it is.” Does it? I’m missing a fucking finger.
She reaches out again, more demanding this time. I’m suddenly too tired to argue, so I lay my hand in hers and stare out over the water so I don’t have to see it. It isn’t until Teagan presses it flat against her chest that I’m forced to look back because the realization of what’s happening is suddenly worse than the injury.
Teagan once had one of the siren gifts. Her song could heal—or at least ease pain. Every time I was whipped, she was there. Humming, singing. I thought it was the healing salves and ointments the palace servants would smooth across my lashes that took the pain away, but it was always Teagan. She kept what she was a secret to protect the dragons, but that never stopped her from using her gift to help me.
The gift she lost because of me.
“I’m sorry,” I say, but then I notice her smile. Why is she smiling?
And then I feel it. A soft, rumbling vibration emanating from her chest. And with it, the painful throb ebbs.
I gasp. “You can still dampen pain.”
She’s beaming now, and so am I. Losing that ability wouldn’t have made her any less of a siren, but I’m so happy for her, nonetheless.
She moves my hand as if to examine the injury, but her attention is entirely on my ring. A flicker of what might be fear crosses her face for a moment, but it quickly fades into a smile.
She makes a gesture that I understand to mean ‘union.’
“Wedding?” When she nods, I laugh. “No. No wedding. Not anytime soon, anyway.” I tell her about our trip to see the Spider and everything that happened after. The fight with Quinn, the glimpse of the old Jade.
Teagan listens patiently, reacting with appropriate levels of shock and disgust at all the right times.
“Am I wrong to forgive him?” I ask after a while. Quinn asked me if we were okay—and we are. But should we be?
Teagan shakes her head vehemently before signing what I understand to be ‘he loves you’ and ‘he’s afraid to leave you.’ Her silent words are reassuring in a way that only talking to my closest friend can be. Sometimes I may wonder if I can trust my heart, but I always know that I can trust her.
“You know, this isn’t just a ring,” I say, looking down at it fondly. I never thought I would wear a ring that carried so much meaning. I pull the mechanism that opens the wolf’s mouth to reveal the sharp point before showing it off to Teagan. “It’s a weapon,” I add, to emphasize a punching motion.
Teagan throws her head back in a silent laugh and claps her hands. I knew she’d love that. Then she flips over onto her back and brings her tail out of the water. There’s a silver band around the thinnest part that wasn’t there before.
“Is that what I think it is?” Sirens don’t wear rings because of their webbed fingers when they’re in the water, but there’s nothing stopping them from wearing something on their tails.
She nods, excitedly, and holds of three fingers before making the sign for ‘moon.’
“Three moons? From today?”
Another excited nod.
“That’s so soon, but I’m really happy for you.”
I don’t voice my concerns—like the fact that we’re on the brink of an all out war—but Teagan seems to see them clearly enough based on the symbols her hands form. ‘I’m done waiting.’
I can’t say I blame her for that. I don’t actually know how long she and Petra have been mates, but I do know that they’ve had circumstance keeping them apart a lot longer than the short time I’ve witnessed. And even now, Teagan’s inability to make the change between human and siren is yet another unfair obstacle put in their way. Perhaps now truly is the perfect time for them.
Teagan’s hands move again, but this time I can’t make out even half of her meaning. “Sorry, I don’t know what you’re saying.”
“She’s asking if you will stand with her,” a voice sounds from behind me. I whip my head around to see Petra, who immediately puts her hands up in front of her. It’s only when I follow her gaze that I realize I’ve drawn the very same dagger that is still somewhat stained with Quinn’s blood.
“Sorry,” I say, sheathing it just as quickly as I drew it. “I guess I’m a little on edge.”
“I’d be surprised if you weren’t,” she says, taking an easy seat beside me on the rock. “Merrick filled us in.” By the look she and Teagan share, I can tell they’re filling in any gaps the other might have.
“What did you mean by ‘stand with her?’” I ask when the silence goes on a little too long and I start feeling like the odd one out.
“It’s a tradition in Marein to choose two people to stand with those binding themselves in marriage. It’s an honour to be chosen.”
There was no such tradition in Lunae that I’m aware of, though our weddings tended to be paltry affairs. “Of course I will. Is there anything I need to do?”
Teagan shakes her head.
“Well, she may have to dance with Merrick,” Petra snorts. “If you want to reconsider, we’ll understand.”
A wave of water, suspiciously close to Teagan, sprays upwards and just manages to catch Petra. Teagan, of course, looks to be denying any wrong-doing.
“Is Merrick standing with you?” I ask Petra, just barely surpassing my laugh as she flicks water off herself.
“Yes. As Regent, it’s his responsibility to approve of any dragon unions.” A question fights to escape, but I bite my lip to stop it. Petra must catch my expression because she adds, “Just ask. I know what you’re thinking.”
There’s no anger in her eyes, so I let the words spill from my lips. “Merrick seems a bit preoccupied with increasing your numbers.”
“That’s not a question.” She almost sings the words while picking dirt out from beneath on of her nails.
No, it’s not, but she knows what I’m getting at. Even Teagan suddenly looks uncomfortable. “If you need Merrick’s permission, why did he agree to a marriage that won’t result in more dragons?”
Petra slaps me on the back. “There it is. I almost thought you were going to back out.” She’s laughing, though nothing about this is funny. “He’s not happy about it. I mean, he has no issue with us together. He would have just preferred we all pair off so we don’t, you know, go extinct. He would have never refused this, though. That said, I agreed to consider carrying a child with either Ory or Wyatt. It would have been too awkward with Merrick, and I don’t think we need anymore Jade’s running around.”
“What?!” She said that way too calmly. “He wouldn’t make you do that, would he?” How could he?
She shrugs as if this all of this is reasonable. “You’re a human. There are thousands of you, and there are only seven of us. I grew up knowing that this would likely be my fate.”
That doesn’t matter. Or, at least, it shouldn’t. Something like that is up to Petra and Teagan. Merrick has no business shoving his nose where it doesn’t belong. They shouldn’t even need his permission to marry.
“You look like you’d like nothing better than to drive that blade into him,” Petra teases. And she’s not exactly wrong. “I’d hold off on that. You kind of owe him.”
“Excuse me?” Since when do I owe Merrick anything? If I remember correctly, I’m the one who saved his life when it was his turn on the post in Lunae’s main square.
“We’ll be taking shifts patrolling the skies at night with the sole purpose of making sure no wraiths wander anywhere near the beach. He gave the order, but I don’t think any of us would have objected if asked.”
I look from her to Teagan and back again. “Why would he do that for Quinn?” Merrick had always put his kind first, and I’ve never held that against him. “And why wouldn’t you object?” Petra especially has never been very fond of us.
She shrugs again. “We’re used to looking out for ourselves, but somewhere along the way, our little fucked up family grew into something a whole lot bigger. We protect each other.”
I don’t know where to begin responding to that, so I ask the first thing that comes to mind. “Where are you getting married?”
Petra doesn’t need to say it for me to see that she thinks the question is strange, but I don’t care. She tilts her head to the left. “Two islands over. Right at the water’s edge. It’s the most convenient place.”
Teagan’s hands move to form a single word. ‘Why?’
I flash her a wicked smile. “I just wanted to know where to leave my gift.”
The sun is getting low on the horizon as I make my way back to the beach. On the way, I reach for Quinn through the bond. He must feel it because only seconds later, his voice is filling my head.
‘Everything okay?’ Protective as ever.
‘I just wanted to tell you something, but I don’t want to distract you if you’re still sparring.’
There’s a momentary pause before he says, ‘You’re the best kind of distraction, and Fern could use the advantage.’
‘Fern?!’ There is no way he’s fighting Fern.
He chuckles. ‘She insisted. Don’t worry, we’re using sticks.’
That has me quickening my pace. I don’t think I’ve ever seen them play together, and that’s the kind of joy I need more of these days. ‘Teagan and Petra are getting married in three days.’
Another pause, and this time I don’t think it’s from crossing sticks with Fern. ‘Oh, wow. That’s great.’ He, no doubt, is thinking the same thing I was. With this war coming, now is certainly an interesting choice.
‘They want me to be part of the ceremony. I’ll have to dance with Merrick at some point.’
‘Are you asking my permission?’ I can practically hear his teasing smirk.
‘Absolutely not. I’m informing you that you’d best be ready to give me every other dance.’
Now I really feel his smile. ‘I can do that.’
‘There’s one more thing I have to tell you,’ I say when he comes into view. I’m surprised to see that there are still some people watching his match with Fern, despite the lack of swords. I know Quinn, who is now shirtless and glistening in sweat from his earlier fights, is going easy on her, but to just any observer, this fight could look real. Even Fern appears to be holding her own, though this would be over in a heartbeat if Quinn wanted it to be.
‘Oh?’ His eyes flick to mine for just a moment before he dodges Fern’s incoming swing with an unnecessarily dramatic roll.
‘Show off. The dragons have decided to patrol the skies at night to make sure no wraiths are near.’
That stops him. He blocks Fern’s stick and then I hear him tell, “That’s enough for today. You did well.”
I can’t make out her words, but the accompanying whine is impossible to miss.
That is, until his laugh becomes the only sound I want to hear. “We can spar again tomorrow. Go find Tess.”
Fern runs off, waving to me as she goes. I wave back until I’m suddenly pulled against an impossibly solid chest. “Hi,” he says, grinning down at me.
“Hi, yourself.” I drag a finger along his arm—careful to avoid the dried blood—and collect a bead of sweat. “Someone’s been working hard.”
He snorts a laugh. “This is nothing compared to the regiment I had in Rosewood.” I know he means back when his father was alive and Lunae was considered their enemy. When he was destined to lead an army to slaughter my people, kill the king, kidnap me, and force me to marry his brother. Gods, what a different life that would have been. His question brings me back to reality. “Are the dragons really going to do that for me?”
“They are. And more than that, Petra said they want to.” It suddenly occurs to me that I never asked if Jade was included in that. Merrick’s order would have no effect on him, but that doesn’t mean that he didn’t agree to it. I should have asked Petra when I had the chance.
Quinn sucks in a quick breath and I know it’s because he isn’t used to people going out of their way for him. “I’m still going to spend my nights as a wolf.”
I take his hand in mine. “I’m sorry. I know that’s the last thing you want.” Even if it’s the safest option.
He glances to the now orange sky as if it were an hourglass telling him that his time as a human is almost up. “There’s something I need to ask you. It’s not going to take very long for me to feel trapped. Last night was hard, even without us fighting. Even if I have control over the wolf, having no choice about spending my nights in that form is going to fuck me up. It might take longer because you’re with me, but it’s going to happen.”
I didn’t hear a question in that. “Tell me what you need.”
“I know sleeping in that tower makes you feel safer, and I swear to you that I had no problem with it. But I can’t be in there if I’m a wolf. I spent too many years in my tower in Rosewood, hiding from the monster inside me. I don’t want to feel like that again.”
I reach up to cup his cheek and he leans into my palm. When I stare into his eyes, I see the scared boy I know he’s only ever dared show me. Not the killer his father turned him into, nor the king he tries to be for his people. When I stare into those amber eyes, the truest version of Quinn stares back. “You don’t have to.”
“I need to be outside. I can’t have any kind of wall around me, but if you want to stay in the tower—”
I stand up on my toes and press my lips against his, forcing an end to that sentence before he can even suggest such a thing. ‘I’m staying with you.’