Chapter 42
CHAPTER FORTY-TWO
QUINN
I t’s been nearly two weeks and there’s been no word from Ty. Either he hasn’t shifted, or he’s dead. With each day that passes, the latter becomes more likely.
We’ve busied ourselves in the usual ways. Training, building enough shelters to support the thousands we hope to rescue from Lunae, and making sure we have enough food for them. The wolves have been hunting—along with Abby, through their eyes—and we have enough dried meat to at least make the transition a little easier. It’s not like the people of Lunae are accustomed to eating much more than scraps.
Despite being as prepared as we are, many are growing restless. Sending Ty back to Lunae was only meant as a way to gather as much information about our current enemy as we could. His silence does nothing to change the plan that is already in place. In one week from today, we’ll make the journey through the forest and camp on the border of Lunae. And the following night? We infiltrate.
While the dragons and wolves slip into the lower city under the cover of night and evacuate as many as possible, I’ll go after Arabella myself. We get in and out with as little notice as possible—but we come prepared to fight if necessary.
Just one more week.
One more week to ready Marein. One more week to train the fighters for Lunae’s retaliation. One more week to prepare our souls for the journey through the veil and whatever lies beyond. Not everyone is making it out of this. Whether it’s a war on Lunae’s soil or Marein’s, war is coming. That much is unavoidable, and when it comes, it will be bloodier than any that have come before. I’m too much of a strategist to know that not everyone is going to make it out alive, and the sword that swings above my head is all too prominent for me to even hope that I will survive it.
All I can do is cling to the words that Evan gave me.
Live for her.
That’s been my motto every day since Evan’s lips spoke the soundless phrase. It’s the first thought I think when I wake, and it’s my final prayer before I allow myself to drift into an uneasy sleep.
“Are you sure about this?” I ask when I enter the room where Jade once floated. As far as I know, this small healing pool has remained empty since he awoke, but once again the room is filled with people donning expressions of concern.
“She is,” Petra says, and I detect a hint of annoyance in her voice. I don’t blame her. If it was Abby asking this of me, I’d be pretty fucking annoyed, too. Gods, I haven’t even considered that possibility and I say a silent prayer of thanks that Abby clearly hasn’t thought of it either. She doesn’t deserve this curse, and neither does Teagan.
But to Teagan, this isn’t a curse. It’s a chance at salvation. A chance to once again exist in the same world as her mate. A chance to be free of the shackles of her fins. It’s not my place to tell if this is a sacrifice worth making. Nor is it my place to deny her that freedom when it was my claws that stole her voice and triggered the fever that left her trapped in this aquatic body.
I blow out a sigh and move to Abby’s side. She’s kneeling at the edge of the pool just in front of where Teagan bobs happily in the water. How either of them looks so calm, I’ll never understand. I can feel Abby’s nervousness through the bond, but she does well to hide it. We’d talked about this and the risks, but in the end, we agreed that this was Teagan’s choice. Our only stipulation was that she had to think long and hard about it.
Today is the day I said I would change her if that was what she still wanted. And judging by the wide grin that hasn’t so much flickered, there’s not a doubt in my mind that she still wants this. That doesn’t change the fact that I was hoping she would change her mind. I don’t want to do this to anyone else, and knowing that Ty might already be dead isn’t helping.
I crouch down in front of her so I can speak directly to her. “I know I keep asking, but I’m going to do it again. Once this happens, there’s no taking it back. Are you sure this is what you want?”
She nods emphatically.
“We don’t know how your body will react. It might not work.”
She lifts a dripping hand from the water and takes hold of mine. Her eyes are pleading, and I know she’s asking me—no, begging me—to let her take the chance. She knows the risks. She’s willing to take them.
“Who’s going to hold her?” This is so much harder in the water. Drowning is a very real possibility, and that’s exactly why we have two siren healers, Tess, Petra, Dru, and even Merrick, crammed into this small room. I suspect Ory and Wyatt—the dragon brothers—are staying with Nuri if Merrick is here.
What’s surprising is that Jade isn’t. Rhett is on patrol, so it’s possible he’s with him, but I thought out of everyone he hated Teagan the least. I expected him to be scowling at us from a shadowy corner of this room.
Petra moves and I expect her to lower herself into the pool, but instead she helps pull Teagan out of it. I guess they’re going to try to do this out of the water. As far as I know, Teagan isn’t supposed to be out of the ocean for more than a few minutes at a time. At least it’s easy to slip her back into the pool if she reacts badly. That’s not going to ease any of the discomfort that comes with the bite and the fever it brings.
Teagan lays her head on Petra’s lap, and Abby takes hold of her hand. This probably isn’t enough to keep her still, but the single nod Merrick gives me says he’s more than prepared to move in if he has to.
“The chest is best,” I say, only half-confident. Ty took only a day to make the change, but that doesn’t necessarily prove my theory. It could still very much be random. “Or as close to the heart as possible.”
Teagan pulls open the waterproof robe she wears to expose…scales. The same intricate design of tightly woven scales that make up her tail travel all the way up to her collarbone before fading out and disappearing entirely around the back of her neck.
“Can you bite through that?” Abby asks. This is the first time her nerves have broken through the calm facade and I’m not the only one who notices. Teagan gives her hand a slight squeeze, and Petra makes a sound of annoyance.
“Perhaps we shouldn’t do this. At least until your sister can weave the outcome.” Petra’s voice cracks, and I realize then that it’s not annoyance I’d seen in her. It’s just fear for her mate.
Teagan shakes her head before tilting it back to meet Petra’s stare. I know they’re having a silent argument that likely has everything to do with the fact that in just a week, I’ll be going to Lunae and there’s a very strong possibility I won’t be coming back. She wants to do this now because she might not get another chance.
“I don’t feel comfortable biting the neck, so it will have to be the arm. I may not get deep enough through the scales, and I don’t want to use more force than necessary.”
Teagan nods, and Petra blows out a breath. “The arm it is, then.”
“Let Abby hold your arm still. I’m going to shift and then I need you not to move. Your instinct might be to pull away from me, but I’m…” My voice cracks, so I clear it. “I’m not going to hurt you.” Fuck, why is this so much harder than it was for Ty? That wasn’t exactly easy, but this…
“She knows,” Petra says, speaking for her.
Abby takes hold of Teagan’s arm and then offers me a small smile. I stand, turning away from them and slipping out of my clothing. Those gathered around take a few steps back towards the room’s edge, but it’s not in fear of me. I would sense it if they were. I’m toeing on the line between man and beast, and the only unease I detect has everything to do with Teagan. It seems even the sirens trust me not to turn into the monster Ty did.
I let my eyes fall close and pull in a steadying breath before letting the wolf have me. I clench my jaw and brace myself for the cracking and reforming of bones, and when my eyes open again, everything looks different and yet entirely the same.
Teagan’s eyes are wide as she takes in my form, but the fear in her is minimal. More than anything, I was worried that whatever trauma she’d suffered from my attack would be triggered when she saw me like this again. It’s not like she hasn’t seen me in this form, but it’s different when my teeth are moments from piercing her flesh.
“She’s ready,” Petra says beside me, but I’m not focused on her. All of my attention is on those eyes that once saw me as the monster who tore open her throat. The monster who stole her ability to sing and brought about the fever that nearly killed her.
This has to work. For her sake, as much as my own. Biting her has nothing to do with the monster or giving us a leg up in our war against Lunae. This is simply about rectifying a mistake and hoping to do right by the people I’ve hurt.
I inch closer to her, saliva already filling my mouth and slipping out from my open jaws. Her heartbeat quickens and I can almost feel the steady flow of her blood as it passes just beneath her skin.
Please let this work.
The scent of her skin is salty, yet sweet. Like an ocean flower ready to bloom into something that can survive beyond the sea.
Her body goes rigid as my jaws clamp down just beneath the elbow. Hot blood flows over my tongue and I resist the wolf’s urge to swallow. There’s a different taste to it, which I should have been expecting because she’s not exactly human.
I want to release, but I lock my jaw to give her as much of the curse as I can. I can only assume it’s passed through saliva, and with the distance from her heart, she’ll need as much as she can get.
“Stop!” Petra says, but I ignore her. She’s panicking, which is more than understandable, but she doesn’t know what Teagan needs. Not when it comes to this.
Petra’s fist moves for my face, but it’s stopped short. I can’t see him, but Merrick’s scent has grown stronger, so it must be his hand clasped firmly around her wrist.
“Don’t interfere,” Merrick says.
Teagan’s hand balls into a fist, and she begins to squirm. She’ll be like this for days unless…
‘I’m going to bite her again.’
“What?!” Abby gasps aloud.
‘Tell them.’
“He’s going to bite her again.”
“The fuck he is,” Petra growls and moves for me again, but Merrick holds her back.
Abby and I release Teagan’s arm at the same time and she’s already reaching for her other before I can ask her to. She must understand, and if she doesn’t, then at least she trusts me enough not to question this.
I don’t hesitate before sinking my teeth into the fleshy part beneath Teagan’s other elbow and allow the buildup of saliva to flood my mouth and mingle with her blood. Her taste is different now. The siren is still there, but there’s something else. Something other .
It’s as if whatever venom passes on this curse that gives me fur is warring with whatever gives her fins. I couldn’t be sure before, but I’m certain now. She can’t have both, and if the magic inside her wins, mine will kill her.
As if to underline that thought, Teagan’s body jerks. Her tail flops erratically and her breathing turns laboured.
Fuck, this isn’t enough. She’s going to die right here.
There’s no time to warn Abby before I launch forward and sink my teeth into the side of Teagan’s throat. Someone’s screaming and if it wasn’t for Teagan’s inability, I would have assumed it was her.
“You’re killing her!” Petra's shriek rings in my ears, and she might very well be right. But if I stop, she’ll die either way. Teagan’s skin is already sheen with sweat and I can feel the fever boiling her blood.
‘Tell me what you need.’ Abby’s voice in my mind is a light in the dark.
What I need is Petra out of the room, but that’s not going to happen. ‘For everyone to calm the fuck down.’ Myself included.
‘Petra isn’t going to do that with your teeth in Teagan’s throat. Can you let go?’
‘Fuck, Abby, I don’t know. Something’s not right with her blood.’
Abby stands and moves somewhere behind me. For a moment, I think this is finally too much for her, but then I hear her hurried voice and know she can only be talking to Tess. “He says something’s wrong with her blood. It’s not working like it should.”
“Because she’s already a siren,” Tess muses, and I hear murmurs of agreement from the other two healers in the room.
“Then make it work!” Petra says as she struggles against Merrick’s hold.
I release Teagan’s neck and the skin around the puncture wounds swell immediately, stopping the flow of blood. That’s a good sign, but her scent is still all wrong. The war inside her is still waging and even with three bites, it doesn’t seem like enough.
“Do something!” Petra shouts at me again. Teagan’s eyes are open, but they’re rolled so far back into her head that all I can see is the whites of them. Her body spasms and what was laboured breathing is now little more than gasping croaks that I know aren’t bringing in enough air.
This is going to kill her.
Abby drops to her knees beside Teagan and I can smell the salt of her tears even though her back is to me. I’m killing her best friend. Even if she doesn’t hate me for this, I’ll never forgive myself for it.
‘Stabby.’
She doesn’t answer, far too focused on the writhing girl in front of her.
‘Stabby, there’s one more thing we can try.’
She swings her head to me, tearful eyes glowing with only a sliver of hope. ‘Tell me.’
‘I need Jade and Aurelia. Now.’
Her face twists in confusion, but she doesn’t hesitate. “Someone find Jade and Aurelia and bring them here. Now!”
Someone runs out of the room, but I don’t see who. I can’t pry my eyes from the dying girl at my feet. I have no idea if this will work. It’s probably a stupid idea, but I’m not just going to sit here and watch her die without doing everything in my power to save her. She doesn’t deserve that.
“Why Jade?” I think it was Merrick who asked, but there’s no time to explain it because suddenly Aurelia is at my side.
“What do you need?” she asks, touching a hand to Teagan’s now pale cheek.
Abby nods to me, ready to translate. I let the words spill out of me without thinking, and as Abby repeats them, it’s as if this plan is coming directly from her. “His bite isn’t strong enough to override the siren when she’s in this form, but there’s one thing that might be. The same blood magic that cursed him.”
Aurelia’s face goes hard, and I know she understands. She and Imelda can both use blood magic, and Imelda cursed me using Jade’s blood. If it’s possible to replicate the curse, maybe that will be strong enough to keep Teagan’s heart beating.
“Where is Jade?” she asks.
“No one has seen him.” I think that was Dru.
“Does it have to be his blood?” Abby asks. She’s connected the same dots I have.
“No,” Aurelia says. “Imelda used Jade because he and Quinn share blood. Familial ties strengthen the magic.”
Familiar ties. ‘Use Petra. They’re bonded by blood.’
Abby repeats my suggestion, and Petra offers her arm to Aurelia in apparent agreement.
“There is no telling what form she’ll take.”
“I don’t fucking care what form she takes as long as she lives!” Petra says, all but shoving her wrist into Aurelia's face. “Use my blood. All of it, if you must. Just save her!”
Aurelia takes hold of Petra’s wrist and lowers it so it hovers just above Teagan’s mouth. She pulls the ornate dagger from its sheathe on her hip and drives the point of it into the soft flesh. Blood trickles from the wound and drips into Teagan’s parted lips. She’s so far out of it now that she probably doesn’t have a clue what’s going on, and that’s probably a good thing. She doesn’t need to remember this.
Aurelia’s lips move in what could be a silent prayer, and the moment they still, so does Teagan.
“No!” Petra screams, shoving Aurelia out of the way and throwing herself down beside Teagan. Abby’s arms wrap around my neck as she cries freely into my fur.
I don’t move because this can’t just end like this. I refuse to believe that this woman who has already survived more than most wasn’t strong enough to survive this.
“She’s breathing,” Petra says suddenly, and she’s right. It’s shallow, but I hear it too. Teagan’s body is still, all but the fractional rise and fall of her chest. If I listen close enough, I can even hear her heart beating. It’s slower than it should be, but as long as it’s beating, that’s all I care about.
“She’s alive,” Abby chokes on her sob. But for how long? There’s a battle brewing beneath her skin, and the outcome is just as unknown now as it was the moment I bit her.
Before Abby can ask, she doubles over and grips at her head. Through the bond, I know immediately that it’s Ty, but there’s no image or voice flitting through her mind. It’s just a wave of overwhelming emotion that crashes into her like a violent sea battering the shore—and then it disappears as if it never existed.
Fear.
“Something’s happening!” someone shouts from behind me, echoing my thoughts. I turn my head to find Rhett breathing hard in the open doorway that separates this room from the rest of the infirmary.
“What is it?” Merrick asks, no doubt thinking this has something to do with Nuri and his unborn child.
“It’s the shadows. They’re gone.”
I leave Abby with Teagan and bolt from the room, down the hall, and up that damn staircase. There’s only one place I’ll be high enough to see over the trees to Lunae, so I run for the tower Abby and I once shared. I feel the tightness of the space around me as I clamber up the spiral staircase in this canine form, but I ignore it. I ignore the memory of my tower in Rosewood and all the time I’d spent there. I ignore the panicked beating of my heart and the difficulty breathing as I force myself to the top of this tower and the crumbling wall that overlooks the forest I once called home.
And then I get there, my heart all but stops.
Rhett was right. Void’s shadows haven’t just changed— they’re gone.
‘Our time is up,’ I tell Abby through the bond. ‘We’re leaving for Lunae.’