14. Chapter Fourteen
Tears drip down her face and I brush them away with my thumbs. Tilting her head up, I cup her cheeks in my hands. Her watery eyes connect with mine, and her bottom lip trembles.
I lean forward to kiss her softly, letting her smooth, plump lips press against mine for a few seconds before retreating.
”You need to sit down for this, Ryker.”
My stomach churns when she says that, but I lift myself from the floor and sit beside her on my bed. She leans into my side, throwing her legs over my lap and bringing her arms around my waist. I curl my arm around her and pull her tight against me, dropping a kiss on the top of her head.
”Do you remember that time I ran over here after my mum had disappeared and I had a black eye?” I nod in response, and my hand that isn”t soothingly rubbing her arm involuntarily clenches into a fist at my side.
“I told you that day that Cameron had hit me because I was refusing to help him. But that wasn”t what happened.” Her eyes are downturned, and she shakes her head from side to side before looking back up at me with fear-filled eyes. I wrap both arms around her and pull her into my lap, pressing us close together, trying to offer her some comfort. ”Cameron hit me that day because I refused to let Fraser rape me once I turned eighteen.”
My whole body stiffens as soon as her words register.
With my jaw clenched and my nostrils flaring with furious rage, I look down at her curled up in my lap. ”What did you just say?”
She buries her head into my chest, small sobs pouring out of her as she struggles to keep herself together. I take a few deep breaths to get a hold of the anger coursing through my body, and then I rub her back gently. I need more of the story. I need to know every detail before I go over there and kill every single one of those sick fuckers.
“Please don’t make me repeat myself, Ryker,” she croaks out. I hold her tight against me, my hand still absentmindedly running up and down her back.
“Callie.” I clear my throat as tears of anger and hurt fill my eyes. “Has he, has Fraser… fuck, fuck, fuck!”
I can’t even bring myself to ask what I want to know. I’m not even sure if I want to know the answer to the question. She cries harder against my chest, and that in itself is some sort of confirmation to me, but I need her to say it.
“Look at me. Please.” She rubs her face against my top, breathing shakily. She slowly pulls her head away from my chest, but she won’t look up at me. I press a kiss to her forehead and utter a quiet please again.
Her eyes slowly raise until they connect with my own, her bottom lip trembling violently as her eyes continue to leak with tears.
She draws in a shaky breath, pulling her lip into her mouth and biting down on it lightly and then she nods her head the slightest bit. My stomach and heart drop simultaneously, my hand that’s on her back stopping its movements. The tears fall unceremoniously, and my throat tightens.
“I’m so sorry, Ryker.” I shake my head at her whispered words and lean my head against hers as my tears continue to fall.
“No, I’m sorry. I never should’ve left. I could’ve put a stop to this. I should’ve known…” My words trail off as more disturbing thoughts enter my brain. “Callie, was it just the once?” She stills at my question and my heart shatters into pieces.
I pull her impossibly closer to me, needing the comfort and trying to also provide some for her.
“How many times, Callie?”
She stays silent and still for so long that I’m wondering whether she heard my choked whisper. Then she pulls away from me, creating the tiniest space between us and looks up at me.
“Too many times to count.”
I mould her body to mine, my body shaking with anger and fury, not only at the ones who have wronged her but at myself for not being here for her when she needed me.
After cuddling Callie for almost an hour whilst both of us were sobbing, I’d laid us down so we were now side by side on the bed.
Her legs are still wrapped around me, and our bodies are close enough for me to smell her delicious strawberry scent. Thankfully, her body has stopped tremoring now and her breathing has levelled to an almost normal pace. My thumb swipes back and forth, softly caressing her cheek as she stares into nothingness, her mind still buzzing.
“What are you thinking about?” Her eyes connect with mine and she rolls her lips inward, showing me that she’s debating something. She draws in a deep breath and squeezes her eyes shut.
“Hey, come on, just spit it out. You know whatever it is, it won’t matter. I’ve got you.” A small smile appears on her face and her eyes slowly open. She looks at me the same way she used to. My heart warms, and I feel my pulse beat a little faster.
“I don’t want to freak out the next time something happens. I want to be normal again.” She trails off, the small smile leaving her face and her eyes dropping from mine. I lean forward to press a soft kiss onto the tip of her nose. ”I want you to help me, Ryk. I need you to fix me.” Her vulnerable tone sends pain shooting through my heart as I stare at her saddened face.
“Then let me help. You can take control. I won’t touch you. I won’t even talk unless you ask me to. Do what you need to do. I don’t want those sick and twisted pieces of scum to have a hold over you in any way.” Her hand delicately frames my face as she looks up at me with such adoration.
“I don’t know if it’ll work, Ryk. But I want to try, and if it’s going to be anyone who can help me get past this, I know it’ll be you.” I give her a playful smirk.
“Oh yeah, and why’s that? Because I’m awesome and so god damn sexy right?” She lets out a soft laugh but shakes her head.
“You are awesome and sexy, yes, but more importantly, you make me feel comfortable. I know that you’d never physically hurt me, and I know I can trust you.” Her thumb grazes across my bottom lip and a tear trickles down the side of her face, “You’re also my first love, my only love as it stands, and I wouldn’t want to be here doing this with anyone else right now.”
I can’t contain the beaming smile that takes over my face.
“You do realise I want your help because I’m interested in other guys, right?”
Okay, that hurts a little, but she doesn’t need to know that.
“Yeah, I’m good with that. I’m the one you trust to help you and I also know that you’re always gonna be mine, so it’s fine. I’ll still be here when you realise that they’re not as good as me.” She lightly punches my arm.
“On a serious note, how are we going to do this?” Her voice shakes as she asks, and it breaks my heart to see my feisty girl so timid.
I press a chaste kiss to her lips before moving away from her to lay flat on my back.
“Start slow, Callie, just do whatever you want to do. Keep your eyes open and on me, and don’t lose yourself in your thoughts. Just stay one hundred per cent focused on me.” She stares for a moment before nodding her head slowly. Her eyes roam over me as I lay with my hands locked together and underneath my head, they trace the features of my face before stopping on my lips. I dart my tongue out to lick my bottom lip and Callie smirks at the move.
“You haven’t changed at all, Ryk.” She looks up at me with sad eyes and I frown.
“We’ll talk, I promise. But I think you need to do this. Also, you know if I thought I could’ve stayed at the time, then I would’ve, but I was just a scared kid, and I thought I was protecting you.” She nods, agreeing with what I’m saying before she lifts herself onto her knees.
“Can you take this off?” she asks timidly, tugging at the hem of my top. I let out a soft and quiet curse. My hand comes down to cover hers and I scrunch my face up, cautious of how she’ll react to what she sees.
“So, there’s something that I have to tell you.” Her brows knit together, creating a crease on her forehead as she frowns down at me in confusion. “I went a little crazy being away from you and well, I missed you a lot, so I wanted some kind of constant reminders of you. The pictures from Johnny weren’t enough because he hardly gets to see you, and it’s not-” My rambling words cut off when Callie’s hand covers my mouth.
“Firstly, pictures? You’re a creep Ryker. Secondly, will you just stop rambling and tell me.”
I smile because yeah, it is creepy, but I’m madly in love with this beautiful woman, and I needed to see her. I needed my fix. She’s an addiction and no matter how long I went without her, I couldn’t give her up.
“I got some tattoos. Quite a few, actually.”
“Yeah, I know. I caught a glimpse of them at the warehouse.” Her eyes drop to my arms which are covered by my long-sleeved top. “I like tats, Ryker. It’s fine.”
She tugs on my top again, and this time I give in. As my top slides up and past my stomach, I hear her quiet gasp. I reach for my top and whip it off quickly, wanting to garner her reaction to the other tattoos. Her eyes stay locked on her date of birth that’s tatted along my lower stomach and she reaches out to trace it. Her mouth pops open as if she’s about to ask something, but her eyes catch on the tattoo carved into my chest.
“Oh my god. No, you didn’t.” Her eyes meet mine for the briefest moment before they flit back to her name inked across my heart. “Ryker.” She doesn’t say any more as her eyes trail back down to the ink on my lower stomach.
“I have two more that are linked to you.”
Her gaze jumps over my left arm, taking in the full sleeve of tribal marks that cover it. Her lids narrow as she slowly searches all the black swirls and strokes.
I turn my arm so that the palm of my hand is facing towards the ceiling, her eyes tracking the movement. That’s when she catches the next tattoo. Her eyes grow glossy as she stares at my inner forearm, her mouth parted in shock.
“Say something.” Her mouth opens and closes a few times, and she shakes her head.
“You got my eyes tattooed on you?” I nod and a slow smile takes over her face as her eyes stay glued to the ones painted on my skin.
“What’s the other tattoo then?”
I swallow nervously, pulling her hands into my lap and just staring at them for a moment, building the courage to look back up at Callie.
I sit up and move forward a tad and motion for her to look at my back. She eyes me curiously before crawling across the bed and moving behind me.
I don’t hear anything for a while, no gasp, no shaky breathing, nothing. It’s making me nervous.
After a moment, the bed dips as she moves back around in front of me, her face wet with tears but a huge smile still on her face.
“Wings and a halo?”
I nod. “For our little angel,” I rasp, emotion swelling inside of me.
“I love them, every single one of them, but you’re crazy, Ryk, for inking all of these onto your skin.”
“No, baby, I’m not crazy. I’m obsessed. I got these tattoos so that you’d be with me at all times, no matter where I am. Your name is etched across my heart because you own it; it belongs to you, and I know that it always will. The wings on my back represent the little life that we created together, the one that was taken away from us too soon.” She peers up at me with tear-filled eyes and a soft smile gracing her lips.
“Your eyes are on my arm because they were the first part of you that I fell in love with, and they’re one of your many great features. Being away from you was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. I got these tattoos so that I had a permanent reminder of the woman that I love. I needed them, Callie, because I needed you, but I couldn’t have you.”
She leans forward and captures my lips with hers. My whole body ignites, nerve endings tingling as her lips move against mine and her hands come up to cup my face.
She’s kissing me. Callie is kissing me…
It”s not just a simple kiss, either. It’s filled with raw emotion, passion, love, and hunger. Her hand snakes around the back of my neck and her fingers twine into the hair at the nape of my neck, tugging lightly, and making me groan. Using that to her advantage, she slips her tongue into my mouth.
She pulls back, breathing heavily, eyes bouncing around my face. “You can touch me, Ryker.”
“Oh, thank God.” My hands clasp around her hips, and I pull her into my lap so that she straddles me. I pause to make sure she’s okay with the positioning, and when she nods, I dive straight back into the kiss.