Chapter 35
Thirty-Five
CADE
Postponing the inevitable won’t make it go away. You’re feeding the beast. You know the darkness inside you will infect him. Just like it infected me. The only way is to—
I crank the music louder, but it’s no use.
She won’t stop. I’ve been sitting here, on the floor in the middle of my room, trying to text Andrea and Sebastian for the last hour, but she’s so fucking noisy I can’t think.
With a growl, I chuck my phone at the gaming chair shoved against the bathroom door.
It’s covered in laundry, sketch books and computer parts— a makeshift barricade for if she tries to hijack my body again.
“You’re fucking cracked,” I mutter to myself as I crawl across the paint-stained carpet to retrieve my phone and turn off the music. It’s useless anyway.
Stop avoiding it, Cade.
“FUCK OFF!”
Annnnnd I’m crying again. I curl in on myself, hugging my knees to my chest as sobs shake out of me. “I’m sorry, Mom, I love you, but I can’t, I just can’t.”
I need to get out of here.
Sniffling, I tug the sleeve of Sebastian’s hoodie (that I’m never taking off) over my hands, wiping away tears and snot. I glance between the bathroom and the door to the hall. It would be quicker through the bathroom, but…
Cade. Stop running from this.
The hallway it is.
Everything blurs as I sprint to Sebastian’s room. It’s like passing through a force field. Her voice dials down to a low hum. I sag in relief, collapsing onto his bed face-first and inhaling his scent on the sheets.
I shouldn’t have left, but I didn’t have a choice. I had to piss so damn bad that I contemplated peeing out the window rather than going in that bathroom. Then, I panicked and ran into my room out of habit.
I’m so tired of this bullshit.
The logical thing to do would be to call Dr. Bedi. And probably Dad. Except logic has left the building. Survival mode is in the cockpit and it’s driving like a madman.
I snort. “I am a madman.”
Silence makes me anxious. And right now, it’s too quiet. I have no idea how late it is, but it’s dark out, so Sebastian should be coming back soon. I think. I check the time on my phone.
Two. More. Hours.
Until then, I’m alone. Trapped between these four walls.
Waiting. Hiding.
Maybe I’ll turn the music back on.
Rolling on my back, I restart my playlist. But even my favorite songs aren’t soothing my nerves.
My body buzzes. Itches. Demands release.
Normally, sex takes the edge off when I’m like this, but Sebastian probably wouldn’t appreciate me fucking myself in his bed.
Then again, he could be into it. He stuck around to watch last time.
I gnaw on my thumbnail.
The poster of a country singer directly across from me is kind of freaking me out.
I don’t like the way he’s looking at me.
He’s definitely judging me. With his ugly goatee, chewing a piece of straw.
Bastard has probably watched Sebastian get off a hundred times.
Probably wants to see me naked, too. Creep.
I give him the finger.
But something right below him, draped over the back of the desk chair, catches my eye. A devious grin tugs at my lips. I know exactly how I’m going to pass the time until my stepbrother gets home.