Chapter 45
Forty-Five
CADE
She won’t fucking listen.
“Are you deaf?” I shriek. “We need to go back!”
Andrea’s knuckles are white on the steering wheel, an endless stream of tears glistening on her cheeks. She won’t look at me. Is she real? Did any of it happen? It did— I know it did because I still taste them on my tongue.
He’s going to sacrifice Sebastian in your place. You must end it.
“Turn. Around!”
She chokes on a sob. “I’m sorry, babe. I can’t.”
I claw at the door handle. It’s useless— she hit the child locks the second she wrangled me into the passenger seat (of my own fucking car.)
You’re meant to join me, Cade. Let the Lord cleanse you of this evil. Look what you’ve done— you’ve let the darkness ruin everything.
I scream until my throat is raw.
Andrea cries harder.
Suddenly, the car jerks to a stop. She shudders, rubbing her leaking eyes. I don’t remember her turning around, but maybe she did. I look out the window—
We’re not at the church.
We’re home. Warm light cascades from the second-floor window. Dad’s car is parked in the driveway.
“Why are we here?”
The front door opens and Dad rushes out. “Cade!”
“I’m sorry,” Andrea whimpers. “I love you, I’m sorry. I didn’t know what else to do.”
I gape at her as she unlocks the car and Dad nearly rips the passenger door off its hinges.
Get away from him. You need to finish this. Go back. You know the sacrifice must be made. Go. BACK.
The world glitches. Time rewinds.
I’m drenched, kneeling on the bathroom floor. Shivering. My wrists are on fire. My chest hurts. I cough and cough, but I can’t clear the water from my lungs. I’m dizzy.
“Cade? It’s Dad. You’re ok. It’s gonna be ok.”
Mom. What about mom? Her sleeves are soaked to the elbows and the entire front of her shirt is stained dark red. Water. And blood. It’s everywhere. I scramble back, but I can’t get any traction. I’m not moving. Why am I not moving?
“Shh, unbuckle him for me, hon.”
“Cade, love, you gotta stop fighting.”
Andrea? I love you too.
I blink and everything shutters again. Dad is hunched over me, panicked hands unwrapping the seatbelt from where it’s tangled around my neck. How did it get like that?
“I don’t wanna die,” I rasp.
Dad blinks back tears. “I know, bud. You’re safe now. You’re safe.”
He’s wrong. He’s wrong. He’s wrong.
“SEBA!” I scream. My neck hurts. It’s bruised from her hands. I’m lightheaded. My stomach groans. She doesn’t feed me anything but broth. I gag.
Sirens.
Flashing.
I’m screaming. It was supposed to be me. Not her. Not Seba. Please not him. There’s a gun in her hand, but she’s not moving and there’s red everywhere. It turns pink in the water. She’s still not moving.
“Mom!”
“She’s gone, bud.” Dad chokes. “She can’t hurt you anymore.”
Blurry figures surround us. I’m not in the car or the bathroom anymore. I’m on the gravel driveway, wearing only a pair of boxers. They’re not even mine. They’re my stepbrother’s. I stole them from his drawer this afternoon. But he’s not here. He’s taking my punishment—
“SEBA!”
“He can meet us at the hospital,” Dad reassures me.
He doesn’t understand. He never has. He didn’t care when Mom joined that awful church.
He didn’t notice the bruises on my wrists and ankles or how skinny I got.
He didn’t stop her from throwing out the medication.
He didn’t listen when I told him she lost her mind. He didn’t lock the gun in the safe.
I whip around, searching for my girl.
She left you too. They always leave you. Only I love you enough to stay with you forever. That’s why you must join me, Cade. Join me.
“ANDREA!”
“Administering sedative,” says a paramedic.
My eyes bug. I grab blindly for Seba. Andrea. Dad. Anyone.
“Shh, you’re gonna be ok, bud.” Dad’s arms hug me from behind. A sharp sting jabs my thigh. It burns like hellfire. Though my voice tapers into whimpers, the screaming in my head remains at full volume. Shadows vignette my vision.
I’m so fucking scared.
“I know you’re scared,” Dad cries softly into my hair. “But it’s for the best.”
It’s for the best, Mom echoes.
I’m so exhausted.
My body gives out.
And my mind finally goes quiet.
Dark… and silent.