Chapter 31
Thirty-One
Tabitha
I wake up to the sun streaming into the cabin.
The sun!
I’m so sick of rain. Colorado is supposed to have over three hundred days of sunshine per year. I feel like all I’ve experienced is rain and thunder the past two days.
I turn, expecting to see Henry beside me, but he’s not there. I rise, go to the bathroom, and then head into the kitchen.
Ah. A note from Henry.
Hey,
I took Zach out for a quick walk. Needed to shake the noise loose. Back soon.
H
Needed to shake the noise loose.
I get it.
I walk back into the master bedroom and take a quick shower. Then I dress in jeans and a yellow T-shirt and return to the kitchen.
Still no Henry and Zach.
I could make some breakfast, I guess. Surprise him when he gets back. But I don’t know how long he’ll be gone. Eggs take about two minutes to cook, and they get cold quickly. Best to wait.
I boil some water for tea, make a quick mugful, and then sit down at the table with my tablet and notes.
Scalpel handle number three. Adsons with teeth. Kelly, Crile, Metz.
Henry.
The way he held me last night.
The ragged sound of his breathing when the dreams found him.
Focus.
I switch to knot practice with the suturing thread I brought. Loop, twist, pull flat, snug, tails even. On the third one, the loop slips. It shouldn’t. I redo it. The fourth is better, the fifth clean, the sixth too tight, the seventh a mess.
“Fuck!” I say out loud.
My phone is face down by my notes. It’s been quiet all morning, which is good.
Lance’s last text is still there.
Checking in again. Still up for coffee?
I don’t owe him anything. He doesn’t owe me anything.
A soft whine at the door. Zach. I open it, and he trots in, drinks from his bowl, and then heads to the rug by the hearth and collapses with a thud. Henry follows a beat later, hair windswept. He glances at my spread of notes, at the failed knot.
“Want breakfast?” he asks.
“Sure. There’s hot water for tea.” I clear my throat. “I was going to make something, but I didn’t know how long you’d be.” I gaze out the window. “I figure I should get on the road pretty soon.”
“It’s early yet,” he replies.
True, and he has a longer drive than I do. Then again, he doesn’t have to leave. This is his family’s place. He can probably do his job remotely. He doesn’t have surgical seminar tomorrow. We’re starting work with cadavers. You kind of have to be in the physical space to do that.
“You want me to cook?” I ask.
“No, don’t break your concentration. I’ll make us something.”
I nod.
He pulls out a cast-iron skillet and lays strips of bacon in it. Then he slices from a loaf of sourdough. A moment later, I inhale the delicious scent of smoky pork.
I bend over my notes until the words blur. My phone buzzing is a welcome respite.
God, please don’t be Lance.
It’s not.
It’s Angie.
It buzzes once more as I stand and walk back to the master bedroom. “Hey.”
“Tabs.” Her voice is warm and too bright. “Am I…catching you at a bad time?”
Yes, I want to say. Instead, “No. Just studying.” While your brother, who I’ve been fucking all weekend, cooks us breakfast.
“Studying? You’re supposed to be relaxing at the cabin.”
“I am. At the cabin, I mean.”
A pause. Is she waiting for me to mention Henry? Not going to do it. That will have to come from her.
“So…how do you like it?”
“The cabin?” I force a laugh. “I wouldn’t actually call it a cabin, Ang. More like a custom mountain home, but it’s great.”
“Have you been…sleeping?” she asks.
Sleeping with Henry? Or actually sleeping?
“Some,” I finally say. No lie there.
“And Henry?” She keeps her voice neutral, like she’s asking about the weather. “Did you two…talk?”
An image flashes in my head. Henry’s and my hands, mouths, and the hard press of our bodies that couldn’t wait. Heat climbs up my neck. I take a sip of tea. “I’m not sure what to say, Angie. I didn’t expect him to be here.”
“Tabs…”
“I mean, I thought you wanted me to come here to relax.”
“Henry needed to relax too.”
“Yeah, I get that. But you might have mentioned he would be here as well.”
“Tabs…” She pauses again. “I knew that if I told you that, you wouldn’t go. But I just wanted you to work through whatever has been weirding you out since the wedding. I didn’t send you there to…force anything.”
“Didn’t you?” It slips out before I can sand it down. “Because it felt pretty forced when I walked in and was greeted by Henry’s dog.”
“You could have turned right back around if you wanted to.”
“No, actually. I couldn’t. There was a terrible storm. I was stuck here. The electricity went out, and we had to light candles and a fire to get through the night.”
Silence. Then, “Well, I guess fate intervened, then.”
“So you’re a messenger of fate?”
She sighs. “Tabs, I sent you there because I know you. And I know my brother. You’re both stubborn as all get-out, and I know damned well there’s something between you. I sensed it at the wedding, and then when Henry asked for you in the hospital…”
“You could have asked if I wanted to see him,” I say. “I might’ve said yes.”
“Would you have?” She doesn’t say it like a challenge.
She says it like she knows me. “You told me he said you had no future. And you got into the seminar. And Henry… Well, he’s Henry.
He’s fighting his own battles, and he’s not going to make you choose between him and something you’ve wanted forever. ”
“So you had no choice but to intervene. Is that what you’re saying?”
“No.” Another pause. “I don’t know. Maybe.”
“I’m not mad,” I say, and it’s mostly the truth. “I just don’t like being manipulated.”
“I know. I didn’t feel like I was manipulating anyone, but I can see your point.
” She inhales. “But good news. Jason and I get home tomorrow. We changed our plans since Henry is doing so much better, and we’ll be coming straight home to Boulder, so I’ll see you right away.
I want you to come to dinner tomorrow night. ”
“After an international flight? Take some time to get your time zones straight, Ang.”
She laughs. “Good. You’re really not mad at me. I don’t think I could bear that, Tabs. And you’re right. Tomorrow is out. How about Tuesday?”
“Sure,” I say.
“Great. I can’t wait to see you and tell you about the trip. And you can tell me about…”
“Are you waiting for me to volunteer a talking point?”
She laughs again. “I’ll just ask, then. You and Henry… Are you okay?”
“We’re fine.”
A pause. Again. “Tabs, I’m not asking for details. I don’t want them. But I need to say again that I didn’t do this to manipulate either of you. I did it because you both seemed like you were drowning.”
“I’m not drowning,” I say. “I’m…wet.” It’s a stupid sentence. But one that has two distinct meanings. Will she get the sexual one?
“That’s my girl,” she says. “Wring yourself out. Hang yourself out to dry.” Another breath. “Do you want me to back off?”
Yes. No. I don’t know. She’s already gotten herself pretty involved at this point.
“I want you to be Angie,” I finally say. “My friend Angie. Not my puppeteer Angie.”
“Copy that.” She’s quiet for a beat. “I love you.”
“I love you too,” I say. “Do you want to talk to Henry?”
“Uh…no. I’ll just call him later on his cell. Jason and I will probably drive up to see him this coming weekend.”
“Okay.”
We hang up, and I return to the kitchen.
Henry’s dishing up our breakfast. “Where’d you go?”
“Phone call.” I hold up my cell.
His features go rigid. He wants to ask who it was, but he knows it’s not his business.
“It was your sister,” I say to put him out of his misery. “Checking up on me. On us, to be honest.”
He exhales sharply. “Ah… I’m surprised she hasn’t called me.”
“She said she’s going to.” I take a seat at the table. “She and Jason are getting back tomorrow.”
“You okay?” He bites off the top of a strip of bacon.
“Fine,” I say too quickly.
“You want to go on another walk?” he asks.
“I should get going pretty soon. You know, the drive back down the mountain.”
He doesn’t reply.
“Or I should study.”
“Right.” He looks at my knots. “Those look good.”
“They’re knots,” I say. “They do the job or they don’t.”
“Right,” he says again.
The space between us gets that electric hum we feel when we’re pretending we’re not thinking about last night.
We finish our breakfast.