7 safe
I’m not sure how long we stay like that for. Hours, maybe.
Gray shushes me and pets me and I ride out the waves of pain in my head and stomach, getting weaker and weaker every minute.
I don’t want to go anywhere. This is weird.
If Dad saw me, he’d freak the fuck out for the hug alone, but all that means is I want to be home in bed even less than I want to be here, in a stranger’s house.
He kept saying it. Safe. But I really feel it, even if I don’t want to acknowledge why.
Eventually, I feel like the tide is beginning to turn. Maybe I can finally get up and figure out what the fuck is happening to me. But the second I think the words, something changes.
It’s not pain. But it’s a needy, desperate feeling I’ve never experienced before. I realize with a crippling kind of humiliation that my fucking dick is hard, and Gray can probably feel it against his stomach. I try to pull back so suddenly I end up on my ass on the floor.
“Whoa!”
Gray reaches for me, but I flinch away. I don’t want him to see, but not even the thick denim of my jeans can hide the fact that I have a raging hard-on.
“I’m sorry,” I say on instinct, shrinking in on myself. “I’m sorry, sir.”
“Oh, fuck. Shh, Tanner. It’s okay. It’s natural. I’m not mad.”
“I’m sorry,” I repeat, because I can’t think of anything else to say, and I flinch even farther away from his reach, even though that makes the cramps come back in force. My head’s so scrambled I can barely breathe.
“Shhh,” he says again.
When he reaches for me this time, I feel too much conflicting arousal and pain to have the strength to pull away. I let him pick me up again with strong hands and deposit me back on his lap.
“It’s okay, omega. It’s normal. Your body wants an alpha, and it’s trying to figure out what to do.”
It doesn’t feel like this is okay, though, based on everything I’ve ever been taught. I shift to get it so at least he can’t feel it, but in the process I must grind down over his crotch because he makes a choked noise, and I realize I’m not the only one with a problem.
His cock was probably partially hard before and I didn’t notice, but when it goes to fully stiff beneath me this time, I feel every single inch of it. And even though my head is freaking the fuck out, my body immediately relaxes.
“Ignore that. I’m sorry. I promise you’re safe, but I might be hard the whole time. I’m not going to do anything with it.”
I find myself breathing heavily at the thought, my pulse racing.
All my terrifying, confusing thoughts from this morning come back to me in force.
Gray grabs my hips and holds me still, and I realize I was grinding against the hardness without meaning to, pushing my ass back into his lap like a fucking whore.
“I’m sorry.”
What else is there to say?
“I told you, don’t worry about anything. You’re trying to figure yourself out. Just stay calm, and don’t let Frank’s voice in your head right now. You’re okay. You’re going to be okay. We just need to wait it out.”
Wait it out. I can do that.
Gray leans back against the arm of the couch and loops an arm around my waist to take me with him. We end up back to chest with me on top, which makes it easy for me to tilt up my chin and run my nose under that sharp, bearded jaw again, seeking out his scent.
Breathing him in helps me like before, but even once the pain is gone, the wanting remains.
For hours. And hours. And hours.
At some point, it gets dark. I need to get home before Dad gets back from his trip and finds me gone, but every time I try to pull away from Gray, the pain comes back, and that weird arousal is still simmering away.
I can’t stay here forever. This has to pass eventually, right?
It’s clear that the situation is taking a strain on Gray as well.
His breathing is careful and controlled, and although his ridiculous alpha cock stays stiff the whole time, pressing up against my ass, he doesn’t grind against me or do anything that feels creepy.
He just keeps holding me and telling me everything is going to be okay.
Once enough time has passed, I stop believing him. Nothing is changing.
“I don’t feel right,” I tell him, whisper soft in the dark now.
“I know, omega. It’ll pass.”
Another of those damn whimpers slips out of me, and I start breathing heavily as I squirm on top of him.
“No, I mean, this isn’t right. Before it felt insane, but like things were… happening? I can’t explain it. Now I feel stuck. Nothing’s getting better or worse. Nothing’s changing, except that I’m exhausted and more humiliated by the minute.
And something in my gut is screaming that I need something else to fix it.”
Gray freezes underneath me, barely even breathing.
We both know what I mean. It may have taken me hours to get to this point, but my frustration and desperation are ready to boil over, and I want it to be over more than I want anything else right now.
It’s enough to drown out all the other thoughts in my head about who I am and how I’m supposed to behave.
“Please, Gray. Just do it. Please. I can’t be like this forever.”
He holds me a little tighter to him, and I feel that hardness throb against me.
“It’s not right, Tanner. You’re too young. Frank would murder me. Once this initial stage passes, I’ll help you find a good alpha to get you through the rest of it. Or we can find a heat center or something that can deal with things like this.”
The thought of this going on and on makes something snap inside me, and I feel hot tears on my cheeks.
“No. I don’t want to wait, I want it to be fucking over with. I’m tired and I’m empty and everything hurts. Will you please just do what I’m asking you to and help me?”
I pause, realizing this might not actually be about chivalry.
“I know I’m not normal. I’m sorry. But you can pretend, can’t you? Pretend I’m a girl and everything is fine. Just this once, and then I’ll leave you alone, I swear.”
Gray turns his head sharply until we’re nose to nose, my head tilted back and his angled down.
“I would never do that,” he says, moving one of his hands up to cup my face. “You’re beautiful, Tanner, exactly as you are. I promise, I don’t think you’re a freak, that’s Frank in your head. I’m just trying to do the right thing. You’re so very young.”
The urge to curl up and fucking bawl hits me hard, but the primal desire to feel him everywhere, finally, is still stronger.
“Why isn’t the right thing doing what I’m asking you to do? I may be young, but I’m still an adult. I’m supposed to get to make my own choices. Please?”
Gray doesn’t answer. He studies my face for a few more moments, running those thick fingertips over the line of my jaw. Then slowly—impossibly slowly—he leans forward until his lips press against mine.
It feels weird, but nowhere near as weird as it should.
My skin flushes hot, and my stomach cramps again as another wave of desperation hits me. I’m exhausted and uncoordinated, but I start to grind myself down against his cock again. I need this to happen now before I can overthink it.
“Oh, fuck,” he whispers, before I physically feel the moment he stops fighting it.
One large hand pushes up under my hoody and splays over my chest, touching me everywhere. Those fucking pamphlets spill out of the pocket and land on the floor, but we’re both too far gone to care. I push into the contact, but he quickly moves his hand down and into my pants.
I’ve had sex before, of course. I’ve had a few different girlfriends over the years. But nothing has felt anything like that first moment when he grabs my throbbing cock with his giant, strong hand and strokes.
I come immediately, my back arching as I spurt into his palm. It does absolutely nothing to abate the need I’m feeling, but I do have a moment of fear that he’s going to be angry at me.
Instead, he fucking growls.
“Good boy, Tanner. Get it all out for me.”
I want him to kiss me again, but I’m also breathing too hard to concentrate on it, so I settle for panting all over him like an animal as he continues to stroke me. There’s not even a hint of softness; my desperate cock immediately ready for round two in a way I’ve never experienced before.
My stomach cramps yet again, though, and I cry out. Something feels weird. Not worse, but weird.
I realize what it is as soon as there’s a wetness between my cheeks.
Shit. The last hint of denial I have vanishes as I experience omega slick leaking out of me. Not like this morning, when it was just there. This is something I can feel happening. The sweet smell of it surrounds us.
Alpha’s eyes flash, and his body tenses beneath me. He’s clearly not holding back anymore when he starts scrabbling at my pants, and I’m desperate for it. Things audibly rip, but I don’t give a shit. I need him inside me more than I need fucking oxygen.
Gray pulls at my jeans until they’re trapped too-tight around my thighs, but my ass is finally out and my desperate cock is sticking straight up in the air.
I can feel him grab his own pants and shimmy them down, and then the skin of his goddamn cock is touching my skin as the scent of his arousal fills the room.
It’s so big. It’s too big. That can’t possibly fit inside me, but I’m too far gone to not want to try.
“Please. Please. Please, sir,” I hear myself chanting, struggling to widen my legs as much as I can with everything tangled around us both.
Alpha presses a hot, open-mouthed kiss to the side of my throat and holds me in place with an arm around my waist before sliding that other hand between our bodies. I assume he’s reaching for his cock, but he’s touching me instead.
No one has ever, in my entire life, touched me where he touches me. But my body practically sucks him in. Thick fingers slide inside me through the wet mess that I’ve created, and my hole clamps down on him once he’s inside.
The sensation of Gray stroking against me from the inside is fucking paradigm shifting, and my cock is already weeping, desperate to come again.
“Fuck. Fuck. Please, Gray. Fuck.”