11 being neighborly
The banging on the door is so sudden it scares me. No one has been here in days. No one ever comes here except Dad and my brothers, and they let themselves right in. We have guests at the lake house, not here, because this place is a shabby mess and Dad doesn’t want people to see it.
Oh god, what if one of my brothers had walked in here and seen me like this? I can’t even picture the shitstorm that would create. Post-nut clarity is hitting me like a ton of bricks right now, and I’m extremely aware of how much risk I just put myself in.
As quickly as my aching body can move, I wipe myself down with a paper towel and pull up my pants. They have wet patches everywhere, but there’s no way to hide that. The entire room stinks of omega slick, but I can’t do anything about that now.
It’s fine. I can just not answer the door. As long as it isn’t one of my brothers, whoever it is will go away, eventually.
I’m throwing open windows and trying to undo the damage when the person knocks again. Curious, I creep toward the front door with a plan to peek at them through the window. As soon as I get closer, though, I know who it is.
There’s only one person I know who smells like that. And Gray probably won’t go away if I don’t answer. At least he’s literally the only person who can see me like this without ruining my life, humiliating though it is.
“Tanner, I can smell you in there. If you don’t answer the door, I’m going to break it the fuck down to make sure you’re not dead.”
I freeze. The edge of concern in his voice is almost touching, even though it’s misplaced. Not even my family has come to check on me, and here’s this near-stranger ready to bust down the door.
“Now, Tanner!”
I’ve never heard him use his alpha voice before, but it hits me like a punch to the gut and my body is moving before I’m aware of it. Without another thought about my stained pants, I swing open the door to see him standing on the other side.
As soon as it’s open, Gray exhales like he was holding his breath. His hair has grown out a little since I first met him and it looks wild, like he’s been running his hands through it, and his eyes are just as wild as he takes me in.
“What the fuck?” I ask him, confused by his reaction. “I texted you this morning. I’m still alive. Why do you look like your dog ran away?”
“I don’t have a dog,” he says, deadpan. “Why didn’t you tell me your dad went out of town and left you alone?”
Honestly, it never occurred to me. I don’t know what to say, so I just shrug.
As an afterthought, I wave him into the house, because even if Gray’s neighbors aren’t nosy, mine definitely are.
“I wasn’t aware you’re my new personal assistant. I’m fine, as you can see.”
Gray stands next to me, letting out frustrated little huffs and clenching his fists. It’s so petulant it’s almost endearing. If you’re into that.
“The last time I saw you, I thought you were close to dying. At the very least I trusted your father to take you to the hospital if things got worse, but then I run into your shit-stain brother in town,
and he tells me he’s on his way to check on you because you’re still sick and you’ve been on your own here for days. Days, Tanner. If you were me, would you not also be worried you were in here all alone, on death’s fucking door?”
I don’t really know, but his concern for me is so palpable I can taste it on the air.
Cinnamon and clove surround me, and I have to take a few steps away from him before my traitorous body reacts.
The fear of someone interrupting killed the arousal I was feeling before, but I don’t think it’ll be long before it comes back.
Which reminds me that I smell like slick and one look at my pants will tell anyone what I’ve been doing. Thankfully, Gray seems so distraught that he hasn’t noticed yet. I need him to get out of here and away from my nose before I lose my senses again and do something else I regret.
“You do understand that you’re not responsible for me, right?”
I spit the words out with venom, desperate for the distraction of my anger.
Gray leans back, his eyes a little wide, but says nothing.
“Thank you for your concern. I appreciate your sense of civic duty or whatever, but I’m no one to you. You can maybe care if I live or die, but you definitely don’t need to go running around town checking on me. Whatever misplaced sense of loyalty you have to my dad is a waste of both our time.
I’m not a child and my fucked-up life is not your project to fix.”
His shock has faded by the time I finish, and although his scent stays even, his shoulders settle back and he seems to draw himself up in size until I’m fighting the biological urge to cower.
“I get that you’re young. And you’re having a difficult time,” he says in a slow and measured way that makes me feel like a snot-nosed little kid.
“And I’m sorry that I crossed a line when you asked me to… do what I did. It shouldn’t have happened. But do not try to make me feel like an asshole for giving a shit. Because as far as I can tell, there isn’t a single person here who does, and you’re one rough day away from crumbling into the wind.
”
I’m not sure what it is, but something about what he’s saying is pinching my fucking nerves. I was pushing myself to be angry before as a distraction, but now I’m all the way there; no bullshit.
“Eat me, you condescending dick,” I say, crossing my arms and taking another step back.
“Who are you? You’re nothing to me. My dad loves me. My brothers love me. They might not be touchy-feely about it, but I have a real fucking family. You’re just some random old guy with no omega of his own who’s getting his rocks off by meddling in my business.
Are you trying to be my sugar daddy or something? Because I’ll pass. I’m fine here, like I always have been.”
Gray’s face slowly crumples as I spew my hatred at him until guilt starts to replace anger as the primary fuel in my body. For a second, I could practically feel Dad’s words spilling out of my lips, and it’s not an experience I want to replicate.
It’s not true. None of it is true. I’m not even convinced that my dad loves me, but I have nowhere else to go and I’m so, so fucking scared right now. Please don’t leave. Stay. Hold me. Keep me safe, like you promised. I don’t want to be alone anymore.
That’s what I should be saying. But I can barely stand to think the words to myself right now, let alone give them the dignity of a voice.
Instead, I stand here, breathing hard with my body held tense, waiting to see how Gray reacts.
At least if he gets violent, I’ll know what kind of alpha he is, and it’ll be easier to let him go. Dad always said that every alpha has to follow his inner wolf if you push him far enough. I assumed it was true, but until now, I wasn’t at risk of being in the line of fire.
Do it. Show me you’re a violent, selfish alphahole, like the rest of them.
Like I was supposed to be.
He doesn’t move forward. He doesn’t fill the air with the scent of rage, although it’s definitely tense in here. And he doesn’t start yelling or going tit-for-tat on insults with me.
Gray stands in front of me, so still that it doesn’t feel real. His eyes are the only thing that move, churning with complex emotions I can’t identify. His hands are loose by his sides, and his breathing is steady.
“Are you gonna say something?” I ask when I can’t take the silence anymore.
“You seemed upset. I was giving you a minute to steady yourself. Unless you’re only saying those things because you’re baiting me to trade insults with you.”
I wasn’t looking forward to a violent confrontation, but somehow, this calm, considered patience is making me so much angrier. Who is he to act like I’m the child here, and he’s the rational adult?
Well, he is a rational adult; I guess. But the arrogance of it is absolutely shitting me.
“Great. Thank you so much for swinging by to stare at me. You can go now.”
I walk past him, careful not to let our skin touch.
Even though I maintain space between us, it does force me closer to him, and that scent starts to really hit me in my gut.
I was doing a decent job of ignoring it before, but the more my anger fades, leaving me confused and kind of sad instead, the more my body seems to yearn for a deep, deep inhale of this alpha.
Or a taste. My body definitely wants a taste, but that’s not happening.
I try to suppress it, but one look at Gray’s face tells me it’s too late. His eyebrows have raised and his nostrils are flared as he subtly inhales my scent.
“You don’t smell like before,” he says, reaching out to gently grab my arm. “You smell better. More natural. But still not right. What have you been doing?”
I yank my arm out of his grasp. Hopefully, my expression is affronted or something similar. Like I don’t want him this close to me because he’s a prick, and not because even that soft touch through the barrier of my shirt is lighting me on fucking fire.
Gray takes a deep breath while he waits for an answer, and I watch his chest move up and down.
His t-shirt is way too thin. Heather gray and expensive looking, the fabric not crazy tight but still sculpting over every curve of his chest.
His pecs are large and defined. The kind of size you get from lifting for decades.
His abs aren’t washboard, but instead have that kind of thickness that speaks to real strength.
Like I could run my fingertips over them and feel nothing but miles of muscle underneath, covered with a layer of softness that I want to sink into.
His nipples are hard. His goddamn nipples are hard, and I’m watching the way his t-shirt slides over them every time he takes a breath, showing me just enough to be a tease.
By the time I realize what I’ve let myself do, it’s too late to fix it. My stomach clenches and my balls throb, then I feel a trickle of slick on the back of my thigh as a familiar sweet smell fills the air all over again.
It’s impossible not to whimper. My knees buckle a little, and I look Gray in the eye. There’s no way the sudden wave of desperation and neediness I’m being hit with isn’t showing on my face. I’m sure I’m giving him goddamn cartoon bottom eyes right now, like the bitch I am, but I can’t stop it.
I need him. Need.
“Oh, Tanner,” he sighs, pity mixing with the obvious arousal in his expression. “I’m so sorry, sweetness. This must be so confusing.”
I don’t care about that. The time for talking is over. I have very little control over my urges, but it still feels a thousand times better than the sucking numbness of the medications. I can deal with the shame afterward. This is more important right now.
“Please,” I say, my voice breathy and desperate. “Please, sir. I need you.”
It’s a swift 180 from a few minutes ago when I was telling him to get lost, but that’s the way I function now, apparently. Fuck it. I’ve already crossed the line once; does it really matter if I do it again?
My body is hot and my skin feels too tight, while my hole seems to gape open with nothing to fill it. Relieving this ache of need is more important than my pride.
There’s color to Gray’s cheeks. I move toward him, reaching for his cock, but he stops me.
He wraps each of those large hands around my arms and holds me about a foot away from him, trying to look stern and sensible, even though I can tell by how fast he’s breathing that he wants this as much as I do.
A glance at his jeans confirms it, as that thick rod is clearly pressing against his fly.
I can see it jutting upward, tightly confined by the denim, and the next shuddering breath he takes moves the fabric enough that the tip of his cock peeks free at his waistband, already pink and glistening with need.
I reach for it again, desperate for a taste. Gray shakes me, though, snapping my gaze back up to meet his.
“I know it’s overwhelming, Tanner. I can only imagine what a rollercoaster you’re on right now. Did you stop taking the pills? I’ll go, and you can take care of yourself. Don’t worry.”
“No! You can’t leave me.” I fight against his grip to get closer to him and take a deep inhale at the crook of his neck, his scent only making me wetter as my cock stiffens inside my own pants.
“You came here to make sure I was okay. I’m fucking not okay, okay? But you can fix that. You can fix it?—”
I trail off, wresting my arms out of his grip to slide my fingers into his waistband and trace the tip of his cock. It’s radiating so much heat, and my mouth waters at the thought of tasting it.
Gray jumps back, jerking his hips away from me, but I catch the noise he makes when I graze my fingertips against his slit.
“A few minutes ago, you wanted me to leave, Tanner. I can’t just…”
Gray trails off, breathing hard as his hips roll a little, briefly overwhelmed by his own lust.
“I can’t just take you at your word when you don’t know what you really want. I’m not trying to hurt you. I’ll leave, and you can jerk off until you feel better.”
Nononononono. There’s a shuddering thought that if he leaves right now, I’ll wither away to dust without him.
“I already did that,” I tell him. “It wasn’t enough. I need more. Need you.”
I take a big step forward and shove my face against his chest, rubbing my chin over that thin fabric like a cat, desperate to get his scent all over me. My hands wrap around his waist, and I slide one down the back of his jeans to cup his ass.
I’ve never cupped another man’s ass in my life, but right now it feels like the only thing my hands were designed to do.
“Please,” I repeat. “Please, sir.”
I grind my hips against his; my small, hard length dragging against his giant one, and I can feel the moment his resolve breaks.
He’s just as much a slave to his animal instincts as I am. I know it. He’s better at hiding it, is all.
Gray exhales slowly and takes my chin in his hand. It’s gentle. More gentle than I think anyone’s ever touched me before. And he uses it to force me to look him in the eye.
“You really need a release, don’t you, sweetness?” he asks in a husky whisper.
I’m beyond words. I can only whine and nod, my eyes filling with tears from the chaos that’s seeping into my blood right now.
Yes. Yes, that’s all I need. A release from you.
“Alright,” he says, leading me deeper into the house, towards the breakfast counter that frames the kitchen. “Then be a good boy and hop up for me.”
I’m too confused to respond, so he takes charge and lifts me up so suddenly it makes me dizzy. Strong arms heft me into the air and deposit me on the counter.
“I’ll give you a release, sweetness. But you’re not getting my cock again until you convince me you really want it. You, not your hormones. Deal?”
Once again, all I can do is whimper and nod.