Chapter 18
SERGEI
Ihad thought that when Leo returned, I would handle it with patience and gentleness.
After all, I knew the situation he was in.
Sleeping with me might have been in my favor, but a man like Leo would have carried extreme guilt over being intimate with one of the men who helped cover up his husband’s death.
For that reason, when I received the notification from the surveillance camera that he had entered the house, I’d dropped the deliveries I was handling at the club, put Hazel in charge, and hightailed it out of there.
During the drive, I’d decided to approach the situation delicately, something I wasn’t used to, but Leo wasn’t from my world. I had to meet him in his.
However, the moment he walked out of the bathroom, and I saw he was fine physically, rationality fled.
A myriad of emotions rolled through me from relief, to anger, then to fear, before reverting to anger, although born out of fear.
If he could so easily leave and return, acting like nothing was out of the ordinary, what was to stop him from doing so again?
Seconds passed, and Leo didn’t respond to me.
The silence stretched between us, thick and suffocating, and for a moment I thought I’d pushed too far.
That I shouldn’t have shown him the cigarette burns on my body.
To him, it looked horrifying. He probably thought I was psychotic, but I’d been enduring self-inflicted pain since my childhood.
Most times the pain didn’t even register anymore.
He didn’t say anything for a long time until he sighed and nodded toward the bed. “Sit down.”
I didn’t move. Not because I didn’t want to, but because I didn’t understand what he wanted from me anymore. One second he was touching me like I mattered, the next he was slipping right through my fingers like I’d imagined it all.
“Sergei.” His voice dropped, edged with a firm and commanding tone that went straight down my spine. “Sit. And take off your pants.”
My body reacted before my pride could catch up.
I sat. Fast. Like a damn dog obeying its master.
Heat crawled up the back of my neck as I reached for my joggers, pushing them down my legs.
My pulse picked up, anticipation settling low in my gut, coiling tight.
He didn’t say anything else, just turned and walked back into the bathroom.
I could hear him rummaging through the cabinets. Was he looking for lube?
I’d take him with just spit if that was what it came down to. It’d been two weeks since I’d felt him inside me.
I hooked my thumbs into my underwear and pushed those down too, kicking everything aside as I leaned back slightly, waiting for him to come back and finish what he’d started. I wanted him on top this time, flat on my back, so I could see his face when he was carving himself out inside of me.
The bathroom door opened, and I lifted my head—
Leo stopped dead in his tracks. His gaze dropped to my naked frame, traveling from my face and down.
I knew I had an excellent form. I saw the way some of the men at the gym where I had my membership eyed me up and down, and not necessarily with lust either.
As a man in security, I took my job of being fit seriously so I could carry out my responsibilities better.
And thank fuck I’d honed my body for Maxim’s protection because Leo could now enjoy it.
Color rose high in his cheeks when his eyes went to my semi, and my cock twitched. He snapped his gaze right back up to my face like he didn’t know where to look.
“What are you doing?” he asked.
I frowned slightly, confused. “You told me to take off my pants.”
His mouth opened, then closed, and he held up a small tube in his hand. “So I can put ointment on your wounds.”
Oh.
“Fuck,” I muttered, grabbing the nearest pillow and dragging it over my lap to cover myself. “You could’ve specified.”
He didn’t dignify that with a response because he actually had. I’d just heard what I wanted to because I craved his touch. Two weeks had passed, and I lived with every detail of what happened in that bathroom the day he left and the night before in his bed.
Leo walked toward me, calm, controlled, as if my nakedness wasn’t affecting him at all.
Damn him. Why was he so cold to me one second and warm the next?
He was wearing just a towel, and it took everything in me not to unravel it so I could see that specific part of him I wanted to feel inside of me.
“Let me see,” he said.
I shifted slightly, moving the pillow aside for him to inspect the fresh wound I’d just burned into my thigh. I hadn’t really been thinking when I did it, but at least he’d shown some reaction to me then. The doctor in him didn’t want me to hurt, even if he hated me.
He stepped closer, close enough that I could feel the heat of him again, and for a second I almost forgot why we were here. My erection grew behind the pillow.
“Kiss me first,” I said, glancing up at him.
His eyes flicked to mine, unimpressed. “Behave.”
I huffed softly under my breath, the urge to push him stronger than it should’ve been. I hated how easily he shut me down, and how much I still wanted to obey him anyway.
His fingers touched my skin, cool from the ointment, spreading it carefully over the burn.
He was clinical about it, extremely detached, as though I was nothing more than a patient.
I clenched my jaw, watching him work. Watching the way his brows furrowed slightly in concentration, the way his touch remained steady.
It shouldn’t have felt like rejection, but it did.
Beneath the pillow, my body had other ideas. My cock stirred, fully hard now despite myself, reacting to his proximity, his touch, the way he refused to acknowledge any of it. I shifted deliberately, letting the pillow slip. It hit the floor.
My erection stood between us, obvious, undeniable, but Leo didn’t even blink. He bent, picked up the pillow, and shoved it right back into my lap like he was covering a piece of equipment he had no need of.
“You’re so fucking cold,” I muttered.
“I’m working,” he said evenly, examining the more recent burns on my stomach. “Don’t distract me.”
Working. Right.
My lips pressed into a thin line as I leaned back slightly, forcing myself to stay still while he continued. The ointment soothed the sting of the burns, but it did nothing for the restlessness crawling under my skin.
Leo’s hand paused for just a second. His gaze shifted to my shoulder and to my neck.
I followed it instinctively and saw he was looking at the new tattoo I had gotten while he was gone.
The mark of his teeth, inked permanently into my skin.
His hand trembled so subtly most people wouldn’t have noticed it, but I did.
The room seemed to go quiet around us as he traced the edge of it with his eyes, recognition and shock flickering across his expression. He finished applying the ointment after that, slower now, more careful, like his thoughts were somewhere else entirely.
When he was done, he screwed the lid back onto the jar and held it out to me.
“You can take it,” he said. “Apply it three times a day.”
I took it, watching him closely. “Maybe I want you to apply it.”
“I’ll be back at work in a couple of days,” he replied. “I’ll be busy.”
“Do I at least get a kiss for being good?”
His gaze snapped to mine. “You broke into my house while I was away. How exactly is that being good?”
Disappointment settled heavily in my chest. He turned, signaling he was done with me, and took a step toward the bathroom. Then he paused and turned back. He pressed his lips briefly to my forehead. Soft. Quick. Gone before I could even process it.
“I’m going to wash my hands,” he said, already stepping away. “Try not to inflict any more wounds while I’m away, or I’ll be very pissed.”
I sat there for a second, stunned.
That wasn’t the kind of kiss I’d meant.
Not even close.
But…
It felt…better.
Something shifted uneasily in my chest as I watched him disappear into the bathroom. I pushed to my feet, still naked, and followed him.
He stood at the sink, washing his hands like none of this was affecting him, like he hadn’t just unraveled me and left me sitting there trying to figure out the significance of the kiss.
“What does this mean?” I asked, crossing my arms over my chest as I leaned against the doorframe.
He didn’t look at me. “Get dressed.”
“No.”
He stilled slightly at that, and I took advantage of it.
This time, I didn’t wait for permission.
I closed the distance between us, grabbed him, and kissed him.
His lips parted under mine with a sharp intake of breath, and his fists pressed to my chest as if he meant to push me away.
But then they flattened, cupping my pecs, and it wasn’t just me in the kiss anymore.
His lips parted, his tongue shoved in my mouth, and one of his hands tangled in my hair, angling my head.
The kiss turned messy fast, everything we’d been holding back crashing together all at once. My hands moved, tugging the towel from his waist, letting it fall to the floor as I dropped to my knees in front of him. He was already hard, and the scent of his precum made me heady.
Finally—
“Sergei, wait.”
His hands came down on my shoulders, pushing me back. I froze, breathing hard, my pulse roaring in my ears as I looked up at him. His eyes were wide in his face, the color in his cheeks high, and his lips wet and bruised from our kiss.
“Let me suck you off, Leo.” I was panting from the effort it took not to take him into my mouth.
“I can’t,” he said, his voice rough.
Confusion flickered through me, and I shot to my feet. Was he playing more of his games to mess with me? “What do you mean, you can’t?”
“Not, not like this.” He shook his head slightly, dragging a hand through his damp hair. “I can’t pretend I don’t want you anymore. The evidence is pointing you right in the face.”
“Then what’s the problem?”
“I—I can’t have sex with you here.”
I reached for his hand and tugged. “Then we’ll do it in the bedroom.”
He flinched and dug in his heels. “That’s even worse. I meant, not in this house.”
A sharp pain lanced through my chest. “Why?”
His gaze dropped for a second before meeting mine again. “This was my home with my husband. Our bed…everything here—” He exhaled. “It’s not right. I already feel terrible enough that, of all the men in the world, I’m having sex with you.”
Jealousy flared, filling me with heat. A hot retort rose to my lips, but I gritted my teeth and pushed it down. I would just piss him off if I made any disparaging comments about his late husband. What was so fucking good about Bradley anyway?
“Then where?” I asked because I wasn’t going to let a little thing like location stop me from being with him again.
He hesitated. “Maybe…a hotel?”
“That’d burn a hole in our pocket with how many times I’ll want you.” Not completely true since I was loaded, but that arrangement wouldn’t be sustainable. “Plus, it’s too impersonal. That’s not what I want from you. Not a random hookup or a booty call.”
His brows pulled together slightly as he studied me. “Then…your place?”
My mind immediately went to my apartment. It was functional, close to Maxim, and barely lived in. It wasn’t somewhere I’d ever imagined bringing him. He was too good for the place. Maxim had always told me I should buy a house. Maybe it was a good time to invest in some real estate.
I shook my head slightly. “My place isn’t suitable.”
“Oh God,” he muttered. “Don’t tell me you’re living with someone. I didn’t even think—”
“No,” I said quickly. “I’m not. Leo, are you still not believing me when I tell you I’ve never really been intimate with another man?”
“You’ve had sex, so—”
“I’m not talking sex.” I exhaled, rubbing the back of my neck. “I meant kissing and sharing a living space, having a relationship, staying in bed with someone after the act, falling asleep together. I’ve never had any of that before. Never wanted any of it either. Before you.”
He swallowed and glanced away. “Then why can’t we go to your place?”
“It’s just…not suitable. I got it because it was close to Maxim in case he needed me for an emergency. I didn’t choose it for comfort.”
“Oh.”
He seemed upset at that, so I pulled him closer. “I’ll figure it out. Just give me a couple of days. In the meantime—”
He placed a hand in the center of my chest and shoved me back. “No.”
“It’s been two weeks.”
Leo walked up to me slowly and cupped my neck. I arched into his touch as he stroked over my Adam’s apple with the pad of his thumb. He leaned into my space so close our lips grazed, but when I tried to move forward, his hand tightened on my neck, holding me back.
“Consider it punishment for breaking into my house when I wasn’t here,” he said softly. “Now get dressed and get out, dollface.”