Chapter Twenty-Two
Braxten
B right orange flames light up the night, the raging fire keeping us warm as the sound of my father’s harmonica drifts through the air. His foot taps to the symphony, shoulders matching the rhythm, while my niece puts on a show, singing her little heart out.
“And it’s hard.” She sways back and forth, holding a stick in place of a microphone, remnants of the s’mores she had earlier smeared all over her face. “Hard being just six years old.”
“Tell us how hard it is.” My father follows in tune, his mouth breaking from his instrument. “Tell us from your soul.”
“It’s so hard,” she cries out, pouring all she’s got into it. “But that’s what makes me stronger.”
“Yes, it does.” He cheers her on. “Sing it, girl.”
Alice, Ryanne, and Gwen all clap to the tune while my brothers and I listen on in amusement.
I’ve said this before and I will say it again, it’s a damn good thing she’s so cute because the kid can’t sing worth a shit, but she’s got more soul than I’ve ever seen from anyone and according to my father that’s all you need when you’re singing the blues.
It has also made every single one of us smile tonight—which was a feat in itself—especially for me because smiling is the last thing I’ve felt like doing since leaving the station.
I’ve been plagued with only one thought, one purpose, and that’s to find the enemy and eliminate him in the most inhumane, unimaginable way.
Applause erupts arounds the fire as the song comes to an end.
“Thank you, thank you.” Hannah bows, a look of pride on her sticky face. “I will be back tomorrow night with my partner. Same time, same place.”
I smirk, loving that smart mouth of hers.
“Unless the audience would like an encore?” she adds, making eye contact with us all.
“I don’t think so,” Ryanne intercepts, pushing from her chair. “It’s time for this Little Blues Singer to get some sleep.”
My niece’s shoulders slump in disappointment. “Aw, Mama.”
“Don’t ’aw, Mama’ me, it is way past your bedtime.”
“Can I stay the night here with Papa Thatcher and Miss Gwen?”
“Honey, you don’t just invite yourself to sleep at someone’s house,” Ryanne gently scolds.
“But it’s not just anyone, it’s Papa Thatcher,” the kid counters, making a good point.
“That’s right,” my father says. “My home is her home, and Gwen and I would be delighted if she stayed, wouldn’t we, dear?” He looks to Gwen, beckoning for back up.
She nods. “We sure would.”
Hannah smiles up at Ryanne. “So, can I?”
Justice is the one to answer. “Yeah, baby, you can stay.”
The approval sends my niece leaping for joy. “Yesssss!”
Ryanne shakes her head at the turn of events, but her smile overshadows it.
“Go on and give your mama and daddy a hug,” my father tells her. “I’ll take you to get washed up, then Miss Gwen and I can read you a story before bed.”
After hugging Justice and Ryanne, she makes her goodnight rounds to us all then heads inside with my father. Gwen stays behind to clean up a few things before joining them while Justice makes a fast exit with Ryanne, obviously eager to put their alone time to good use.
Standing from my chair, I’m about to do the same with Alice until Knox stops me with a hand on my shoulder.
“Got a minute?” he asks, gesturing towards the gun shed.
There’s an unsettled energy about him that has me quickly agreeing. “Yeah, sure.” My gaze shifts to Alice. “I won’t be long.”
“It’s fine,” she assures me. “I’m going to help Gwen clean up. I’ll meet you at the house after.”
Her understanding only reaffirms what I’ve always known: she’s not only perfect for me, but perfect for my family.
Hooking an arm around her waist, I reel her in close, giving her a long, deep kiss with the promise of more to come.
It leaves her unsteady on her feet and a blush disappearing to places I can’t wait to fucking devour.
Afterward, I run to catch up to Knox who is already headed for the shop.
Silence reigns as I fall in step next to him, the tension that’s been between us these last few weeks mounting with every stride. It has him digging into his pocket for a cigarette and lighting up.
He takes a long, deep inhale, the fiery tip illuminating his face, enhancing the torment he lives daily.
A suffering I wish I could shoulder as my own.
“When are you going to quit that shit?” I ask, breaking the silence between us. It’s something I give him and Justice hell for often, but the truth is, I don’t mind it as much as I lead them to believe. It’s a scent I associate with both my brothers. A scent that always brings me home.
“Never.” He gives me the same response he always does before shooting me a look, a smirk following soon after.
It triggers one of my own. I pull him into a headlock, both of us laughing as we enter the shop. Flicking on the lights, I see another piece has been started, its parts scattered all over the station Knox works at.
I turn to him in surprise. “A new one?”
He takes a long pull of his cigarette before nodding.
I lean against the cabinet across the room, folding my arms over my chest. “You’ve been spending a lot of time in here lately.”
He exhales the cloud of smoke that was buried in his lungs before speaking. “Yeah, well, it gives me something to do since you guys have been so busy.”
The jab isn’t amiss. “Never too busy for you, brother.”
His tortured gaze shifts from mine, refusing to acknowledge my words.
I don’t let him. Not anymore. “I mean it, Knox. I know things have changed since Alice showed up, but—”
“That’s a fucking understatement,” he grunts.
Annoyance begins to bubble to the surface, overtaking the guilt that’s been constantly plaguing me. “What do you expect me to say? It’s not like I expected this to happen, but I’m not sorry it did either, otherwise she would still be with that piece of shit.”
And not with me.
I decide to keep that part to myself, knowing this is hard enough on him.
“Nothing,” he mumbles, continuing to avoid my gaze. “I don’t expect you to say anything.”
“Then why did you bring me here?” I ask. “To tell me what a shitty brother I am?”
He acts completely indifferent as he puts out his cigarette. “That wasn’t the plan, no.”
“Then what was your fucking plan?” I ask, losing my patience.
“To say I’m sorry, all right?” he snaps, his black eyes a raging inferno as they meet mine again.
“Well, it’s a piss poor apology!”
“It’s not like this is easy for me,” he fires back. “I know what needs to be done, I know what needs to be said, and what I have to accept, but I can’t move on as quickly as you guys have!”
“You think this is easy for me? For Justice? It’s not, this is fucking us up too.”
“Well, you would never know it.” His voice cracks, portraying just how much he’s hurting.
It hits hard, easing the frustration festering inside of me, but not Knox. The vulnerable moment only embarrasses him, which in turn pisses him off even more.
“You know what, forget it. Just go.”
“No.” I remain where I am, refusing to let him push me away. “We need to deal with this, whether you want to or not.”
“I said leave!” His roar blasts through the shop before he grabs a mangled piece of metal off the counter and fires it across the room, putting a hole in the wall.
It’s the start of a complete melt down. Object after object is snatched off the counter and launched across the room with brute force.
“Fuck her, fuck him, fuck them all!” His anger from the present shifts into the pain of his past as he self-destructs before my eyes.
When he picks up the new piece he just finished, a project that took almost a year to build, I lunge forward, throwing him into the wall.
“Stop it!” I bellow, pinning him in place. “I’m not leaving. I’m never going to leave you because you’re my brother, and nothing or no one will ever change that, not even Alice. Do you hear me?”
His chest expands painfully, lungs heaving with the emotion he tries to contain, until the dam breaks altogether.
I pull him against me, wrapping my arms around his rigid body.
He fists the back of my shirt, his desperation more prominent than ever. “I’m sorry I’m so fucked up.” His muffled words shred the inside of my throat, making it ache like a motherfucker.
Teeth grinding, I pull back, bringing us forehead to forehead, forcing him to see what burns deep in my veins. “I’d do anything for you, Knox. I’d walk through fire for you, bleed out the most painful fucking death for you…I’d die for you.”
His blood shot eyes cling to every word I breathe.
“But I can’t do the bond anymore.” The words kill a part of my soul as I say them out loud. “I can’t share her and I think deep down, you don’t want me to. I think you’re as done with this as the rest of us.”
The truth of that statement reflects back at me. “You’re right, but how am I supposed to say goodbye when you guys are all I have?” His head dips in an effort to hide his pain, but it bleeds through every word.
“It’ll never be goodbye,” I tell him. “I’m not going anywhere and neither is Justice. We will still slay every fucking demon with you. You still have me just like I still need you.”
His gaze lifts back to mine, hope flickering within.
“I can’t fight this battle without you, Knox. I need you to help me protect her. Can you do that?”
Agonizing seconds pass before he nods, giving me the response I long for. “Yeah, I can do that.”
The air that’s been locked inside my chest escapes with force. I pull him against me once again, feeling the bond between us reforging.
It will take time for us to adjust to this new reality, but I have no doubt we will because there’s one thing that could never change, and that’s our love and loyalty to one another. It will always remain indestructible.