Chapter 23
CLIO
I was hiking with a sore pussy and a happy heart.
After another crazy round of sex this morning, we’d driven across town to Wes and Joy’s house to pick up JT from his sleepover then continued on to a trail that Sam said was his favorite.
We headed up into the hills with a layer of sunscreen for our faces. JT jabbered about his night, regaling us with stories of popcorn and cereal with chocolate milk instead of plain milk for breakfast. We rounded a bend, and JT hopped over a boulder in the trail.
It had been his first sleepover, and to him, it had been a success.
I stopped to climb over the big rock with far less agility than my son, and Sam took my hand to help me up and over. I caught my breath at how beautiful he looked.
Sam, the wolf.
He had his shirt off again, which I may have teasingly suggested was necessary. His tanned skin was smooth over sculpted muscle. The light golden hairs made his chest seem to glow in the sunlight.
He was mine.
All my original thoughts of him as only a pretty face and a cocky player were gone.
Oh, he was a pretty face, and he had a gorgeous body and knew exactly what to do with it, but he was so much more. A little bit at a time, he was showing it to me.
Or, was I slowly letting him in enough for me to see it?
Either way, I liked what I saw.
How I felt when I was with him.
Knowing he was a wolf rearranged everything in my mind about him, too. He wasn’t just a young rodeo star. He was strong, capable. His confidence was justified. He had a pack. He knew things I didn’t.
Maybe on some biological level, the cave-woman part of my brain suddenly recalibrated to believe he’d be a good protector / provider.
The trail straightened out at an open meadow. JT took off running at lightning speed–way faster than a normal kid should be able to–then pulled up and spun around to face me. He gave me his “uh-oh” look when he realized he’d done something wrong.
I stopped and Sam stood beside me. “He’s not supposed to run that fast in front of others,” I murmured to Sam to explain.
“Ah. I see.”
“Sorry, Mommy.” He glanced up at Sam. “I forgot.”
“Boy, you sure are fast,” Sam probably noticed the opportunity to talk to JT. “Real fast.”
JT put one foot forward like he was at a starting line. He’d shucked his shirt when Sam had, mimicking him by tucking it in the back of his jeans, so it dangled out like a little tail. Unlike them, I was still in my sweatshirt. “Running is fun.”
Sam glanced at me. I could read his look. He wanted to offer to help here in a way I knew I couldn’t. I was tired of JT having to hide how amazing he was. If there was a time and place for a Wolf Lesson 101, it was out here in the wilderness. It seemed Sam agreed.
I nodded, and Sam grinned.
“I’m fast, too. Wanna see?” Sam asked JT.
JT nodded, his dark hair flopping over his forehead. Then his hands went to his hips.
Sam took off jogging, then once he got to the clearing, took off running. Then…. RUNNING. He was across the clearing so fast he’d been a blur.
“Wooooooooow.” JT’s mouth fell wide open. He cocked his little head to the side. “Can I, Mommy?”
I frowned. “Can you, what?”
“Sam asked if I could show him how fast I can run.”
“He did? When?”
He shrugged his tiny shoulders. “Just now.”
I glanced across the field. Sam waved. He must’ve said something that JT could hear, but I couldn’t.
Warmth filled my chest. Finally, JT had what he needed–an adult who understood what was going on with him. Who knew what to say about it–knew the rules he had to follow to stay safe.
I smiled down at my little wolf-boy. “Then go for it. I want to see, too.”
He screwed on his determined face and set off toward Sam.
My little guy zipped across the meadow. When he got to Sam, Sam crouched down and gave him a high five.
They talked for a few moments, then lined up side-by-side and took off, running back together.
It was clear Sam was going slow, so JT could beat him. I tried not to melt.
When they stopped in front of me, they were both pink cheeked and smiling. And not at all winded.
The jerks. I had huffed and puffed over the boulder in the trail.
“He’s sure got a fast wolf in him,” Sam told me with a wink.
JT looked up at Sam and set a hand on his bare tummy. “I gotta wolf in me?”
“Yup. Just like me.” Sam patted his broad chest. “It makes me run fast, and I can hear all kinds of stuff.”
“I can do that, too!” JT’s face lit up. For once, someone he could relate to. “Mommy, I got a wolf in me. Did I eat it for dinner? Is that why? You say if I eat my veggies, I get big and strong. Did I eat a wolf?”
I glanced to Sam where he was biting his lip, trying not to smile. He knew this was serious stuff.
“No, you didn’t eat a wolf. You are one. That’s what makes you special.”
“Mommy, are you a wolf, too?”
“Nope,” I said. “Just you.”
“I don’t have to pretend to be slow with him,” JT added, as if this wasn’t a big deal. He was told he had a wolf in him, and that was it.
I flicked my gaze at Sam, and he winked again.
“We’re pretty special, buddy. But we still have to make others not feel bad that they aren’t as cool as us.”
“And Mommy isn’t cool like us?”
I tried not to smile. JT was being earnest.
“I can’t run or jump or climb the monkey bars like you can,” I told him. “But I’m good at other things.”
“Yeah, you can change a tire as fast as Sam can run.”
I laughed. “I guess I can.”
“Your mommy is human. Smell me and then smell her. Can you tell the difference?” Sam coached him.
JT lifted his nose in the air and sniffed in both of our directions. “I don’t know.” He shrugged, losing interest. “Maybe.”
“Could you tell how Remy’s dad smelled different than her stepmom?”
Light seemed to dawn on JT’s face. “Ohhhh. Yeah. So Remy has a wolf in her like me?”
“Yeah.” Sam had subtly led us over to a large boulder, and the three of us climbed up on it and sat.
“So if someone smells like a wolf, it’s okay to show your abilities.
And if they smell like a human, then you keep them a secret.
Does that make sense? You don’t show them at school because most kids are human, even though Remy’s in your class. ”
“Okay,” JT said.
“When you have a wolf inside you, you can tell a lot about people with your nose. When they’re scared. When they’re lying. And someday, you might scent a female who will smell so good that you’ll know she’s your mate.”
JT nodded, his big eyes wide and serious. “Yeah. I think that’s Remy because she smells like yummy cookies.”
Sam shot me a surprised look. It was clear that was a new one for him. I rolled my lips together to keep from smiling. He and Remy were friends, but a crush at five? Oh boy. “You want Remy to be your mate?”
“Does that mean I keep her?” he asked Sam.
He nodded.
JT giggled. “No, I can’t keep Remy ‘cause her dad makes her eat all her peas, and I don’t like peas. I’m five!”
Sam and I both laughed, our glances tangling above JT’s head. Warmth filled my chest at the shared moment.
“Right. You don’t like peas.”
“But how did the wolf get inside me?” JT asked.
Sam looked at me.
Eek. Here it was–the moment I’d been avoiding for five years.
“Well, bud, your dad was a wolf shifter,” I said. “So you are half-wolf shifter like your dad and half-human like me.”
JT looked at me with those big blue eyes. He had asked me before if he had a dad, and I’d simply told him no. That I’d wanted a little boy so much that I decided to have him on my own. “Oh.”
“When you get older, your wolf may come out, or he may not,” Sam said gently. “But you’re still a wolf, whether you can shift or not.”
“What’s shift?” JT asked, grabbing a pebble and flinging it down the trail.
“Well, since I’m a grownup I can shift into my wolf form. Let him out and run. Do you want to see?”
JT’s eyes practically bulged out of his head. “Yes!”
Sam looked at me, brows raised.
“Can he? Please?” JT wiggled with eagerness.
I smiled as a sense of relief washed over me.
I’d feared a day would come at some point where JT needed to know more about what he was.
I’d figured I at least had until puberty.
Ted had told me that was when they first shifted.
But Ted had also said a baby with a human might never shift, and to him, that was a bad thing.
Still, I’d been bracing against a future where I had to deal with this on my own.
But I wasn’t on my own with JT anymore.
Sam was here, and he understood everything about what my son experienced. Thank God. I was barely handling rafter climbing. I wasn’t sure how I could handle my precious baby turning into a wolf. What if he didn’t turn back? Now I didn’t have to face that moment alone.
I realized they were quiet and waiting for my answer.
Did I want the man I was falling for to show me his wolf?
Hell, yes, I did. I might even swoon.
“Go for it.”
Sam grinned and stood, jumping down from the boulder in a single bound. He started stripping his clothes off.
JT instantly stood to undo his jeans like he was going to get naked, too.
“No, just Sam, bud. We’re going to stay dressed.”
Oh my God. What was it about kids and keeping their clothes on?
“Oh.” JT slouched a bit in disappointment. It was clear he wanted to do everything Sam did, which made my chest feel warm and gooey.
Sam looked up at us, winked and dropped to all fours. Then… holy shit. A giant white wolf with pale blue eyes stood in his place.
“Whoa,” JT said in awe.
“Whoa,” I repeated.
We both scrambled down the boulder.
“Oh my God, Sam.” I didn’t know why I had to touch him. Had to feel that fur in my fingers.
He lay down on his belly, as if to make himself less frightening for JT, who had frozen at the base of the boulder with wide eyes.
“C-can I touch him?” JT asked.
Sam whined, his tongue slipping out like he wanted to lick JT’s hand.
I dropped to my knees beside Sam, burying my fingers in his fur. I stroked his soft, silky ears. “You can touch him,” I encouraged JT. “It’s still Sam. See?”
Sam nuzzled JT’s hand until JT gingerly patted his head. “He’s big.”
“Yes, he is,” I said appreciatively. I’d seen Ted’s wolf, and it was impressive.
I found it exciting. But Sam’s wolf thrilled me.
It was almost as if I had that sense of recognition that Sam said he’d felt when he first met me.
Like I’d dreamed about this giant white wolf before.
Like I’d been waiting my whole life to meet him in person. Tears filled my eyes.
“He’s beautiful, isn’t he?” I choked, throwing my arms around Sam’s neck.
The next instant I found myself wrapped in his arms, sitting on his lap. He’d shifted back to hold me.