Malin – The Past Comes Calling #4
But as they lay tangled together in the quiet dark, she couldn’t ignore the lingering fracture between them.
The terrible physical distance was gone, replaced instead by a mental fortress he had built to survive.
The fracture was his absolute refusal to be weak in front of her.
He claimed her tonight to feel safe, but in doing so, he kept his own heart safely barricaded behind a wall of control.
She wanted to make his mind whole again, to truly share his burdens, but she had no idea how to reach a man who was using his own dominance to hide his brokenness.
Drifting toward sleep, boneless and warm, with Will curled tightly at her back exactly like he used to, she took a breath, acknowledging the first step in healing.
She knew surrendering control wasn’t a magical cure for his trauma, and she forced herself not to fixate on his lack of release.
Tonight was a monumental first step. Letting the heavy glow of aftercare wash over her, she closed her eyes, believing that maybe, just maybe, she could hold their fractured pieces together by sheer will.
As sleep claimed her, the dream took over.
She was back on the blood-soaked battlefield near Media, surrounded by the guards who had tried to execute her family.
But this time, she wasn’t terrified. She reached out, and the blazing warmth of their life force rushed into her veins.
Her entire body hummed with it. A dark, intoxicating ecstasy filled her.
A rush of absolute power, almost as potent as the physical pleasure she just shared with Will.
The stolen energy flooded her veins with the intoxicating illusion of invincibility.
A god among mortals. The hungry magic inside her roared, craving more, pulling harder, drinking deep…
“Malin!”
A sharp, invisible shockwave slammed into her chest, severing the connection like a physical blade.
Her eyes snapped open, her lungs gasping frantically for air.
Will was sitting up on the edge of the mattress, staring down at her in the shadows. His chest was heaving, his hazel eyes wide and shadowed with a terrifying mix of adrenaline and sorrow.
“You were siphoning me,” he breathed, his voice tight. “I had to use my nullification to snap you out of it.”
It was just a dream. Right?
But the lingering, electric hum of stolen energy still vibrating under her skin told her the horrifying truth. She hadn’t just been dreaming. She had been draining the life from the man she loved while he slept beside her.
Bile rose in her throat.
God, what had she almost done?
What if Will hadn’t woken up in time? What if the kids had crawled into bed with them?
Will gasped for breath and clutched his chest as the color began to return to his face.
“Will, I’m so sorry,” she choked out, scrambling backward against the headboard, suddenly terrified of her own hands. “I didn’t mean to. I’ll see the Minsters at first light. Are you… Did I hurt you?”
She had become a monster. She could have seriously hurt him… even killed him. Now, it made perfect sense why people with this power were exiled or killed.
“I’m fine, Sparks,” he said automatically, but he was already standing up, stepping back from the mattress. He ran a trembling hand through his hair. “But I’m going to sleep out in the common room tonight. Just to be safe.”
He left, taking all the warmth of the room with him. She couldn’t blame him.
Malin tossed and turned, her racing heart pounding against her ribs.
She couldn’t get past the horrifying reality of her wild magic.
Just as they had finally bridged the gap between them, her own blood had violently torn them apart again.
She was just as much a part of their bond falling apart as he was.
Maybe they were never meant to be.
Some soul-bonds didn’t seal.
Unable to bear the cold, empty bed, she slid out from under the covers. She pulled Will’s discarded linen shirt over her head, letting the scent of him wrap around her like a shield, and padded barefoot into the dimly lit common room.
She found him exactly where she expected. His massive frame was sprawled rigidly on the oversized couch, his eyes fixed blankly on the ceiling.
He didn’t look at her as she approached. “Is something wrong? Can I get you something?”
Malin’s throat tightened. Even now, after she nearly drained the life out of him, his first instinct was to serve and protect her.
“I can’t sleep,” she whispered, sinking onto the cushion beside his legs. The couch was wide, but the emotional chasm that had suddenly reopened between them was an impossibly huge void. She reached a hesitant hand toward his knee, but he subtly shifted his leg, pulling away from her touch.
“I’m so sorry about earlier,” she pleaded, her voice shaking. “I can’t control it. I’m terrified I’m going to hurt you or the baby. I’ll go to the Minsters first thing in the morning. They have to know how to fix this.”
Will remained silent. The only movement in the dim light was the tense, rhythmic twitch of the muscle in his clenched jaw.
She leaned in, deliberately crowding his space, refusing to let him shut her out again. “We are broken, Will. If it’s not you running from me… It’s me destroying our chances of fixing things. Maybe our bond is one of those that isn’t meant to be sealed.”
He closed his eyes, a heavy, jagged sigh shuddering through his chest, but he didn’t pull away this time. “I don’t believe that, and I never will. Please don’t give up on us.”
“I just want you to know that I love you,” she whispered, her voice cracking.
“No matter what. Thank you for stopping me tonight. And thank you for agreeing to let me come with you to Fellspire. You keep making comments about how strong I am, but I never asked for all of this world-bending power. I’m terrified of it.
I rely on you to help me make sure I don’t hurt anyone until I can control it. ”
She shifted closer, slipping her arms around his waist and pressing her ear against his chest to hear the steady, living thud of his heart.
“I know you are struggling. I just wish you would let me in more,” she said softly into the fabric of his shirt. “This isn’t easy for me either. We are supposed to be here for each other.”
For a heart-stopping second, he remained frozen. Then, slowly, the rigid discipline in Will’s posture finally broke. His large arms come up, wrapping securely around her and pulling her fully into his embrace. He buried his face in her hair, holding her tightly against the dark.
Without another word, Will shifted his weight, sliding his broad arms beneath her knees and her back. He lifted her from the couch effortlessly, carrying her back into the shadows of the bedroom.
He laid her gently on the mattress, pulling the heavy blankets up over her shoulders. His calloused fingers brushed a stray, damp strand of hair from her face, his thumb lingering warmly against her cheek.
He leaned down, pressing a deeply caring kiss on her forehead. “I love you so much, Sparks. Get some sleep. We will figure this out, but not tonight.”
He didn’t climb into bed beside her.
She had hoped, but she didn’t expect it… after what she’d done.
As he stepped back out into the common room, Malin pulled the blankets tight.
Tomorrow, she would have to face the Minsters, say goodbye to her children, and see her mother one last time before they left for Fellspire. But for tonight, the suffocating ice between them had finally begun to thaw.