Chapter 24 - Avery
Rowen carefully cleaned me up with a warm cloth, like he was afraid too much pressure might break me.
A huge contrast from what he’d literally just put me through. I was surprised I was still in one piece after the way he’d fucked me.
And I was still cuffed to the bed, helpless.
He got the sheets out from under me and put new ones on before bringing the food to the bed, sitting down next to me with the fork in his hand.
“I can feed myself.”
“I know,” he said gently, patient but firm, pushing the fork to my lips anyway. “Eat, baby. Let me take care of you. You’ve been through a lot today.”
I wonder whose fault that was.
The sudden softness gave me whiplash. He acted as though he hadn’t cuffed me to the bed for hours and then fucked me raw after making me promise to never leave.
“I’m not hungry,” I said quickly, pressing my lips together so he couldn’t shove the fork between them.
He didn’t look convinced. The fork remained pointed at me, a small bite of chicken on the end.
I couldn’t eat. My thighs were sore. My pussy ached. My throat felt shredded from all the crying and screaming.
“Let me go.”
“No.” My stepbrother shook his head and sighed. “I can’t do that, not when you tried to leave without telling me. I thought we trusted each other. What was that? Why would you sneak out in secret?”
Tears stung my eyes, and I tried swallowing the lump in my throat. “I wasn’t leaving leaving. I told you I wanted to see my mom. You kept saying no, and I didn’t want to fight anymore, so I figured I’d be gone for a day or two and then come back.”
“You should’ve told me,” he said, his broken heart on his sleeve. “How can I trust you?”
“How can I trust you?” I clapped back, pulling at my wrists for emphasis. “People don’t tie their partners up when they try to leave the house.”
His expression didn’t change. He put the food down—thank goodness, because my appetite was nonexistent—and leaned in until our noses touched.
It was odd, the way he looked at me, like he still hadn’t figured out how to handle me, how to hold me gently while loving me hard.
“I’m sorry, Av,” he said after a while. “I lost it when I thought you were leaving me. I can’t lose you. I won’t. I’d rather keep you chained to the bed for eternity than go a day without you in it.”
My breath hitched at his heavy confession, my heart trying to decide whether it was beating fast out of fear or something else, something deeper, darker.
Rowen’s obsession, his need to have me, control me, scratched a need I didn’t know existed. He’d changed my entire being, slowly breaking me down until my pieces fit his perfectly with his. Then, he’d absorbed me, until there was no me and no him.
Only us.
“I just want to see my mom, see if she’s changed, if she can accept us,” I told him, hoping he’d understand it wasn’t me wanting to get away from him.
Several beats of silence followed, and we just sat there, staring at each other, both stubborn, refusing to give in.
Sighing, Rowen backed away from me and rubbed his hand over his face before looking out the large glass doors to our bedroom balcony. Then, he turned to look at me. “What if I give you something else?”
“I don’t wan—”
“I’ll get your mom here,” he cut in. “I’ll fly her out so she can stay for a night or two.”
My chest swelled with happiness, seeing how willing he was to keep me happy, to give me what I needed and wanted.
I nodded at him, a lump forming in my throat. “Thank you.”
He looked relieved and leaned in to kiss me.
“I’ll call her in the morning.” The next kiss was hard and punishing, a lesson, then softened until his kisses turned into feather-like grazes.
“I know I’m not doing this the way I should, but I’m trying.
For you.” His voice was rougher, like he was holding back. “I love you so fucking much.”
There they were again, those words.
No hesitation, just his truth.
I didn’t trust myself to speak, though, not when I was torn between distancing myself and crawling back into his arms.
He watched me, waiting, seeming patient, but I knew him better than that. We both knew his control was tight around me, and he could snap at any moment, demand whatever he wanted, even if I was unwilling.
Still, my heart skipped a beat, wanting to force those words from my lips, but my brain hadn’t caught up yet. I’d missed every opportunity to say them back, to let him know I felt the same way, but could I really say it now?
Cuffed to his bed, wrists sore. High on being edged, thighs slick with our mess.
My brain was pointing out the red flags, telling me Rowen was losing it, that he was dangerous.
You should probably get the hell out of here the moment you can.
It was true. Rowen was unhinged, unbalanced, and obsessive, but I found myself craving it rather than being repulsed.
His love looked nothing like what it should. It was dark and relentless, and it came with a pleasure so intense, it felt like a punishment. That didn’t mean he was dangerous. He wasn’t a threat to me. He didn’t cuff me to the bed to hurt me. He just couldn’t stand the thought of losing me.
I opened my mouth then closed it, since I still couldn’t say it.
It wasn’t that I didn’t feel something. It was that I felt too much, and I wasn’t ready to open that dam. Not like this.
“Can you let me out of these?” I asked quietly, feeling guilty for not saying what he needed to hear.
His eyebrows furrowed, eyes boring holes into me, digging. His jaw ticked once, and then he blinked, the look of yearning fading into remorse—softened with a small smile.
“Let me feed you first.”
I thought about saying no—I should have—but instead, I nodded and opened my mouth when the fork full of food came near my mouth, letting him feed me.
Showing him what I couldn’t tell him.
I trust you.
***
I blinked awake and turned over to find the bed empty.
My wrists ached faintly, just enough to remind me what he’d done.
What I’d let him do.
Rowen fed me bite after bite, carefully cutting everything, watching me chew like I was fragile, and he had to be ready to catch me.
Then, he uncuffed me, only to hold me all night. Even when I shifted in my sleep, he was always there, repositioning himself to keep his arms wrapped around me. I should’ve felt caged, imprisoned, but I slept like a baby.
It was jarring, feeling so safe in the arms of someone who didn’t know how to love without taking everything. Who was willing to do what it took to keep me, even if it meant going against my will. Someone who tied me up and still whispered his sweet love in my ears.
Moving slowly, my body aching with every step, I made my way downstairs.
He wasn’t in the living room or the kitchen, but once I made it across the house, I could hear his voice, low and hushed.
His office door was cracked just enough to let me see him pacing with his phone to his ear.
“I don’t need you to like me, Marissa. I get it. You hate me for what I did, what I took, but she wants to see you. Don’t you just want her to be happy? She’s your daughter, for fuck’s sake. Just come visit her.”
My stomach twisted. He was talking to my mom.
I should’ve walked away, but I was stuck to the floor, listening, my heart pounding in my ears.
“She’s not a prisoner,” he said, colder this time. “She’s here with me because that’s where she wants to be.”
Well…
It was mostly true.
“Avery isn’t a little girl who needs your permission. She’s made her choice. Don’t be stubborn about this. She asked for you to come visit. I can get the next flight out and have you here by the end of the day. Just let me know when you can show up for your daughter.”
There was a pause, and I pressed my hand to the cool wall, letting it ground me.
Rowen was trying to play nice, trying his best to give me the one thing I’d asked for, no matter how much it hurt him.
“She loves you. She wants to see you,” he said, quieter, like it broke him to say it. “So come see her or don’t. But if you make her choose,” his voice had dropped into something darker, rougher, “you will lose her.”
I barely had time to pull away from his door when he ended the call. I rushed down the steps, but I wasn’t fast enough.
Rowen cleared his throat just as my foot left the last step. I turned, my chest aching with deep emotion when his eyes met mine.
His mask dropped, releasing the tension and frustration he had been carrying. He softened in a way he only did for me.
“Morning, baby.” His voice was deep and wrapped around me like a warm blanket, making my toes curl.
It was mesmerizing, the way he descended the stairs effortlessly and pulled me into his arms—something straight out of a fucking movie. He held me close, like he was starved for the physical contact.
His lips landed on my forehead, then my cheek, then my lips. The kiss stayed slow and steady, like he had all the time in the world to claim me, to remind me who I belonged to.
“I’m sorry I wasn’t there when you woke up,” he murmured against my skin. “Especially after last night.” He pulled back just enough to search my face. “How do you feel this morning? Still sore?”
“A little,” I admitted.
His lips spread with a wicked grin. “I spent the morning planning something to make up for it. I know it doesn’t fix things, but I want you to know I’m trying to be better for you.
” He brushed my hair behind my ear, his thumb dragging along my jaw, making me shiver.
“I made you breakfast. I’ll feed you, and then we can take a long soak in the hot tub.
” He rubbed his thumb over my bottom lip.
“And how does a full body massage sound? I won’t even tie you up this time.
” Our lips were nearly touching. “Unless you ask me to.”
Heat bloomed low in my belly. I was ashamed my body had forgotten his wrongdoings so quickly.
“You made breakfast?” I asked, trying to hide the effect he had on me, trying to remain casual.
His grin deepened. “Of course I did. It’s my job to take care of you.”
He led me to the dining room, his hand on my lower back. Dishes of eggs, potatoes, sausage crumbles, and cheese—for breakfast bowls—were on the table, alongside some cut fruit and mugs of coffee, mine looking the perfect shade of brown.
He knows me so well.
We mostly ate in silence, but it wasn’t awkward or uncomfortable. Every so often, his foot would brush against mine. He even fed me small bites, watching me eat like it was mesmerizing.
When we finished, he took my hand and led me to the steaming hot tub outside.
Rowen removed his clothes and climbed in first then offered his hand.
I pulled the shirt over my head and dropped it to the floor. When I was about to take his hand, I hesitated—barely—but he caught it immediately.
“I won’t push you,” he said softly. “I know I came on strong yesterday, but I meant everything I said. I can’t exist without you. I love you, Avery. I’ll wait for you to catch up, however long you need, but I need you to know I love you more than anything. I always will.”
He was so intentional with every word, like he knew exactly what I needed to hear.
I nodded slowly and let him help me into the water.
It was warm, perfect really, easing my sore muscles the moment I sank into the water. Rowen pulled me into his lap, and I leaned back against his chest, his hands sliding over my shoulders and down my arms.
“So, is she coming?”
Rowen froze for a moment then said, “I honestly don’t know.”
“You didn’t have to threaten her.”
“I didn’t threaten her.” He laughed. “I just told her to make her choice.”
His hands moved to my back, massaging the tension away, then did the same for my thighs and hips.
I should’ve been mad at him, but I melted anyway. I knew this was him trying. In his own fucked up, controlling way—he was trying.
And I didn’t want him to stop.