Amber
When someone knocked on my bedroom door, I knew for sure it wasn’t Zach. That boy had zero boundaries.
“Come in,” I said, swivelling my chair around.
“Hey,” Mum said, poking her head in.
“Hi, Mum. Did you come to flash your ring again?” I said, wiggling my eyebrows.
She cackled and jumped into my room, closing the door behind her.
“I never in a million years expected a proposal. I’ve only known him for a month,” she said, admiring her ring.
I didn’t know Luke well, but I could see that he loved my mum.
“Mum? What made you choose my dad as your first?”
She lowered her hand, looking surprised. We didn’t speak about my deadbeat dad often.
“Hormones,” she said, without hesitation. “We were young and horny.”
It wasn’t like my mum to speak so openly, but I liked that she was treating me as an adult.
“Are you considering something with Nolan?”
I thought of Nolan and almost winced. He was a good friend, but he didn’t do anything for me. Not after what Zach did. What I was complicit in.
My mum went off on her condom and contraception speech. I felt a little guilty for misleading her, knowing Zach would be coming to my room tonight. He would be my first, and I had no clue if he’d bring his own condom or use one from my bottom drawer. My mum had become my secret, steady supplier.
I broke the cycle when I asked her about prospective dates and venues for the wedding. Our town church was perfect. I could picture my mum walking down the aisle. She was only thirty-eight, and she’d make a beautiful bride.
She paused for a moment and reached out for my hand.
“You’re okay with me getting married, right?” she murmured, though she didn’t look confident about my response.
“Of course I am. I can get away with pretty much anything now that your attention won’t be on me.”
She chuckled and hugged me.
She thought I was joking.
? ? ?
I was showered, shaved, and in bed. The longer I waited, the more worried I became. Zach had the power to destroy me in so many different ways.
As a younger sibling, I’d always looked up to Zach. He wasn’t always dismissive, and we had happy memories that perhaps he’d forgotten. I don’t know when my love became twisted, and I began to hero-worship him.
Then Alisha came along. The times she came to the house, she always liked to pretend to be nice to me in front of Zach, but I saw the malice in her eyes, the sneer beneath her smile.
Dad got sick, and Zach spiralled out of control.
My sigh caught in my throat as tears welled up.
I should tell him no. Stop it all now.
But when I closed my eyes, all I saw was him.
The way he smelled. How he held me. The slight stubble around his lips.
God.
How that stubble had felt down there.
I sighed again.
The battle was already lost.
Ten years, and I still wanted to fix him. Heal that hurt he carried inside him.
It wasn’t Alisha or his old friends who mattered. They’d all become irrelevant once Dad died and Zach moved out. I was still here. So was Mum.
Surrender or sacrifice, it didn’t matter anymore.
There was no knock or noise until the door closed. Doubt and fear evaporated until only a slight flutter in the pit of my belly remained.
The floorboards creaked, and he fumbled around beside my bed until he found the switch to the lamp.
He only wore a pair of shorts.
I was still busy studying his pecs and nipples when he pulled the covers aside. I hadn’t quite followed the instructions he’d sent via text.
“Take them off, Amber,” he murmured, staring at my vest and short set.
I thought they were cute.
I braced my weight on my feet and pushed my shorts down, kicking them off the bed before pulling my vest off. My bravery lasted two seconds, and I covered myself with my hands.
He hooked his hands beneath his waistband and pushed his shorts down. The waistband caught on his cock, but it seemed sturdy enough to bounce and remain upright as the elastic gave way.
He didn’t rush.
He teased.
My first off-screen cock.
Then the shorts fell to the floor, revealing his heavily hung balls.
Nolan was not packing all that.
Zach gripped himself and slid his hand up and down the length, giving it a special tug at the tip.
I was a terrible girlfriend.
The tip shone. His cock was dripping for me.
I’d break up with him tomorrow.