Amber
My ear was pressed to the door, but I couldn’t hear properly over the pounding of my own heart. Good thing the toilet was right there, in case I actually pooped my pants.
Sex and sweat.
Shower.
But the thought of my mother knowing what we’d been doing—behind her back, in her house, under her roof—made my stomach twist into something ugly. I closed my eyes, pressing my palms flat against the cool tile wall.
Did she still see Zach as her son? Or had the years of distance he’d put between them severed that feeling completely, leaving nothing behind but the label?
I needed to talk to her. But the shower came first.
Everything was out in the open now. This was what I’d wanted, wasn’t it?
To stop hiding. To tell the truth instead of lying every single day.
But sitting here, hunched on the edge of the bathtub with my knees pulled to my chest, all I felt was the sick, hollow guilt of having deceived the one person who’d always, always been on my side.
I sighed and turned toward the shower, steam already starting to fog the mirror.
FML.
It wasn’t until I was under the hot spray of the water that I realised all my fears had been that Zach would break me, or use my love against me. His demeanour when he first came home at Christmas had promised heartbreak. But even if he had, I would have let him.
Maybe that’s why I initially hid him from my mum. She would have seen right through me.
I reached for the body wash. It was time to face the music.
? ? ?
My knock was timid, but it was Luke who opened the door.
“You should be okay, poppet,” he whispered, brushing past me on his way out.
I stared after him, wondering what he meant, but he was already halfway down the stairs, footsteps fading into the quiet of the house.
The bedroom sat washed in soft golden light—one lamp on the nightstand, the overhead switched off, throwing long shadows across the carpet.
My mum sat on the edge of the bed, now in her dressing gown, hair damp at the ends from her own shower.
She patted the space beside her. I closed the door behind me and crossed the room to join her, the mattress dipping under my weight.
“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner, Mum,” I said, with a sigh, sitting down beside her. “I wanted to, but I wasn’t sure how you’d feel about… my choice.”
“It was a shock,” she said, patting my hand, her thumb tracing small, soothing circles over my knuckles. “But Luke put it into perspective, and that helped. So, Zach, huh?”
I smiled and squeezed her hand.
“It all just sort of snowballed.”
“Hm. That I can understand.” She tucked a strand of hair behind my ear, the way she used to when I was small. “Are you using protection? Those condoms—”
I threw my head back and stared at the ceiling, the lamp’s glow blurring at the edges of my vision.
“Please, Mother. Enough with the condoms.”
“True. You came despite a condom.”
“What?” I gasped, my head snapping back so fast my neck pulled. “You never told me that.”
“I didn’t want to put you off using contraception. Probably best you use them all,” she mused, a faint, wistful smile tugging at her mouth. “You still managed to sneak into my egg.”
I couldn’t prevent the giggle that escaped me.
“That’s gross, Mum.”
“For you it is.”
There was a comfortable silence for a few moments.
“He isn’t my real brother,” I whispered eventually.
“I know, sweetie,” she whispered back. “But I need a minute to process.”
There was silence again before she spoke.
“Hopefully Zach will always be part of our family. This house is in your name, and Zach’s. It’s funny how things work out. Clive always said to leave this house to both of you. I just had to wait until you turned eighteen.”
“What about you?” I said, confused.
“Luke’s planned the next fifty years out,” she said, shaking her head.
“You know, they’re quite similar. Zach’s already planned what uni I’ll be in and where his job will be. I think we’re getting a plant to see if we can keep it alive before we get a pet.”
“Just warn me if you’re planning to make me a granny.”
“Warn me if I’m about to become a big sister.”
“Well, about that…”
Holy fucking shit.
? ? ?
It had been a lifelong dream, becoming a sister.
Zach had essentially rejected me in more ways than one over the years, but I walked back to my room in a daze, the hallway carpet muffling my footsteps, my own heartbeat loud in my ears.
I paused outside my door, one hand resting flat against the wood.
A baby brother or sister.
Omg. This was fucking huge.
Mum had been tired—understandably, given everything—but she’d promised to talk to Zach tomorrow. I still had tonight to sit with it alone.
My door flew open before I could turn the handle, and Zach nearly ploughed straight into me. He caught himself just in time, hands gripping my shoulders hard enough to anchor us both.
“What happened?” he hissed, eyes scanning my face like he was searching for injury.
“I’ve got no idea,” I said, shaking my head, still half-lost in my own thoughts.
He pulled me into my room and shut the door behind us, the click of the lock loud in the quiet.
“You can finish your exams in June, then move into my place,” he said, already pacing, floorboards creaking under his bare feet with every turn.
“I’d been so lonely as a kid,” I said, watching as he stopped mid-pace. “The same as you. All that time I wanted a sibling. I thought that’s what you wanted too.”
I saw the darkness gather in his expression.
But it wasn’t anger or resentment this time. It was bleakness.
“Mum’s pregnant,” I blurted out.
His mouth opened and closed.
Then again.
A perfect circle, like a fish in a tank.
“Pregnant?!”
I nodded, watching as he began to pace once more, muttering to himself, hands dragging through his hair.
“What was she thinking? What age is she? It’s that dickhead’s baby. Fifty percent his. Argh. That’s disgusting. Why is your mum still having sex?”
That was only what I caught.
I glanced at my phone, still sitting on my nightstand. Next time I divulged any big news to him, I needed to capture this on video.
“Are you sure she’s pregnant?”
I never got a chance to reply.
“Does she know she’s carrying the anti-Christ?”
Oh, boy.
I walked over to him and put my arms around his neck.
“We are going to have a baby brother or sister, Zach.”
His eyes locked on mine.
“A baby,” he murmured, his eyes softening.
I smiled.
There was something precious about an innocent life entering our lives.
This was all about family.