Chapter 3 Evicted
EVICTED
‘Shockwaves have run through the villa. Now we find out who will be voted as the least favorite villa member by the couples we have left. It’s down to two, Randall Jackson and Becca Thurston.’
Deborah Carter, the bubbly former Miss America, was there to help make this moment truly an event, but the long, dramatic pauses as they teased the latest villa eviction were getting unbearable as I watched on from my usual position of a hotel room bed with Hannah on speakerphone.
“Kent. Would you like to tell us who you’ve chosen to stay and who will leave the Love Villa tonight?”
“Oh, look at his face, Han. He’s enjoying this!”
Kent could barely disguise his grin as he stood up and leveled his eyes on Randall. He licked his lips slowly and took a few breaths, letting the tension build before turning to Becca.
“Becca. You tried to break up Kyle and Nora, and that was bang out of order. When you refused to apologize and then called Tina a piggy, I would’ve loved to have seen you leave right then.”
There was a dramatic pause as the camera zoomed in on Becca, who gulped uneasily, sensing the gig was up.
“But then, you really made up for it when you helped us win the bucket challenge, and seeing how you reconnected with Tina and Nora on the fiesta night showed us who you really are.”
Becca’s hands rose to either side of her face, unsure if this was a reprieve or just a cruel punishment. Kent turned away from her, and that small grin came back across his face.
“Whereas you, Randall. You’ve been nothing but selfish, arrogant, and rude to just about all of us.”
The camera switched to Mandy and Hera, holding hands and nodding in agreement with tears in their eyes.
“You don’t seem to care, Randy. About anything. I’ve lost count of your antics here every day. Is there any chance for you? I really don’t know if we should give you one.”
Deborah “Miss America” Carter let the moment simmer, the camera darting between the villa members’ expressions, while Randy nervously shifted his weight from one foot to the other, swaying as we all waited for Debs to speak.
“Okay, Kent. So, please tell us who will leave the villa tonight? Becca or Randy?”
“The person we’ve chosen to leave the villa is…”
I washed down my jello with a gulp of tequila as the seconds ticked agonizingly by.
“Randall.”
Even though it was expected, Hannah and I both gasped, caught up in the drama of the build-up.
Randall looked dazed as he walked away from the fireside and began throwing his clothes into a hold-all.
There were none of the usual hugs or tears as he went to the exit, just an awkward shake of his head before Randall unceremoniously walked out the front door for the last time.
A few moments later and Randall walked through a booing crowd and stepped into the interview room, set up outside the villa that he’d wreaked havoc on for four weeks.
Still blinking in disbelief, he sat down on a violently lime-green couch with the chirpy blonde Love Villa presenter, Jemima.
“Wow! Quite the reception there, Randall, what do you think to that?
“Oh man, I feel their pain. They didn’t want me to leave. I’d be booing too.”
Randy’s face turned to confusion as another round of boos rang out, this time with a touch more venom behind them.
“I don’t think that’s why they’re booing, Randall,” Jemima told him.
“Um…What?”
“So, Randall, what went wrong for you in the villa?”
“When you say ‘wrong’, what do you mean exactly?”
“Well, how about we take a look at your highlight reel and you tell us?”
“Lucy, you there?”
“Yes.” I said back in amazement as Randall’s villa highlights appeared on-screen, punching an inflatable flamingo, pushing Hera in the pool, pulling down David’s shorts during the pie challenge, throwing hot dogs at Mandy while chasing her and shouting “Eat them!”, cracking a half-dozen eggs in Victor’s bed.
And then there was the night-cam footage.
A shadowy figure humping in different beds like a dog with no self-control.
The horrific highlight reel ended, and the camera switched back to Randall, his face as white as a ghost. He gulped and looked fearfully at Jemima, before murmuring weakly, “You didn’t show any of the good ones.”
“Wellll, there weren’t that many, Randy! Do you have any last messages for your former housemates before you leave the villa?”
The color came back to Randy’s face, and his jaw closed into a determined look. You could visibly see the anger growing and then burning within the deep ridges of the frown that had formed on his sun-kissed forehead.
“Yeah, actually. Two words… Fuc…”
Jemima swiftly and professionally cut him off, “Thank you, Randy! I really hope you find love out there.”
A half-hearted applause followed, but it might as well have been a slow handclap. Randy got unsteadily to his feet, swaying and wondering what the hell had just happened.
“That was amazing!” Hannah said.
“Sure was! I’m gonna miss him, though.”
“Me too. Hey, in the meantime, why don’t you get out there, see if there’s anything… Or anyone! To take your mind off it,” she teased.
I knew I should, but I couldn’t face it. Instead, I would end up spending two days living off room service and watching TV, wondering how to beat the slump I was in.