Chapter 11
The door had barely closed behind us before Ryder had me pinned against the wall, his mouth crashing down on mine with a hunger that stole my breath.
I held on tight as his hands roamed everywhere.
He was rough, possessive, and I knew I couldn't get enough.
I wrapped my legs tighter around his waist, moaning into the kiss, trying to grind my pussy against him.
After a second, he spun me away from the wall and carried me through the house to his room.
He kicked the door shut with his boot, and the sound of us being sealed in echoed like a promise. Ryder set me on my feet just long enough to yank my shirt over my head, his calloused fingers brushing my skin with a reverence that made me shake and moan all in the same breath.
Before I knew what the hell was happening, because honestly, right now, I was in Ryder's world, he dropped to his knees. He pressed hot, open-mouthed kisses down my stomach as he worked my jeans and panties down my legs in one rough motion.
“Been thinking about this,” he murmured against my thigh, his voice gravel-rough with raw need. “Every damn night since you came back. Dreaming about how you’d taste.”
Before I could catch my breath, he had me flat on my back, legs spread, with his big body wedged between them. His shoulders were broad, and he used them to keep me exposed as he put his mouth on me.
I opened my mouth on a soundless cry when I felt the hot, wet, relentless feel of his lips and tongue on my pussy.
He licked through my folds with long, slow strokes, taking his time until every pass of his tongue had my hips lifting helplessly toward his mouth.
Then his lips closed around my clit, sucking with just the right pressure, and a broken moan tore from my throat.
One big hand gripped my hip, holding me firmly in his control, while two thick fingers pushed deep inside me and curled in a way that made my entire body tighten.
I cried out, hands tangling desperately in his hair as the pleasure built too fast, too intensely, until there was nothing left but him.
His mouth. His fingers. The rough strength of his hand keeping me exactly where he wanted me.
When I finally broke, violent waves ripped through me, my back arching and my thighs trembling around his shoulders.
Ryder didn’t stop as he worked me through every shudder until I was shaking beneath him, oversensitive and breathless, his name falling from my lips like a broken prayer.
Ryder rose to his feet, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, smearing all my wetness across his skin, before bracing his hands on either side of my head, leaning down, and kissing me deeply.
I tasted myself on his lips and tongue, and it seemed so obscene, so lewd, yet my pussy got even wetter.
I watched, chest heaving, as he stripped off his shirt, revealing the hard planes of muscle and old scars that only made him look more dangerous and attractive. When he reached for his belt, his eyes darkened with pure dominance as they locked on mine.
“Hands above your head.”
The command sent a fresh wave of heat flooding through me, dripping from my pussy and down my ass crack, soaking the sheets beneath me.
I obeyed, slowly stretching my arms above my head while Ryder watched every movement.
His gaze followed the length of my body before settling on my wrists, and something about the intensity in his expression made my pulse beat even faster and more wetness leak.
He reached for his belt and pulled it free of his jeans, the soft slide of leather making my stomach tighten with anticipation. Instead of immediately tying me, he ran the strap through his hands once then looked down at me.
“You trust me?” The question was quiet, but I could see by his face how important my answer was to him. “Yes.”
Ryder’s jaw tightened. “Then keep your hands there.”
I did as he leaned over me and looped the leather around my wrists, taking his time as he secured them to the headboard. He tested the restraint with two fingers, making sure it wasn’t tight enough to hurt before sliding one finger beneath the leather to check it again.
“You tell me if it’s too much.”
I nodded, panting, unable to speak.
His gaze lifted to mine. “Let me hear the words, sweetheart.”
“I’ll tell you.” Only then did he seem satisfied.
Ryder sat back on his heels and looked at me. Really looked at me.
My arms were stretched above my head, my wrists bound together, my body completely exposed beneath him.
I gave the belt an experimental tug and felt the leather hold firm.
The realization that I couldn’t simply reach for him sent another pulse of heat through me, and my thighs instinctively shifted together, spreading my cream along my skin.
Ryder noticed, and his hand settled on my knee and slowly pushed my leg open again. “Don’t hide from me. Not now. Never, Lila.” His palm traveled slowly up the inside of my thigh, rough calluses dragging through my wetness and over sensitive skin until I shivered. “Let me look at you.”
There was something almost unbearably intimate about lying there while he took his time.
He wasn’t rushing to get inside me or grabbing and taking simply because I had given him permission.
Ryder’s hands moved over my body as if he’d imagined touching me so many times that now that he finally could, he refused to miss any of it.
He bent and kissed my stomach then lower, his mouth brushing over my hip as his hands spread my thighs wider. By the time he moved back over me, I was breathing hard and pulling uselessly against the belt.
“Ryder.”
“I know, baby.”
The endearment nearly undid me. He settled between my spread legs, and I couldn’t stop myself from looking down at him. Ryder was built like the rest of him—thick, hard, and intimidating enough to make my breath catch.
Even like this, there was something undeniably powerful about him, from the broad muscles of his chest and shoulders to the strength in the thighs braced between mine.
My gaze lingered on him for another second before traveling back up the hard planes of his body. Jesus. The man looked carved out of all the rough, unforgiving things, and suddenly, I was very aware of exactly how much bigger and stronger he was than me.
His cock hung heavy between his thighs, thick and long, the flushed head already glistening. A slow bead of pre-cum welled at the tip and slid down the underside.
Ryder wrapped one big hand around himself and gave a few deliberate strokes, eyes locked on mine the entire time. He gathered the slick fluid with his thumb, then leaned forward, pressing that same thumb against my lower lip and smearing the slickness across my mouth.
“Open,” he murmured.
I parted my lips and licked the precum from his thumb, slow, gaze pinned on his, tasting the salt of him. Ryder’s eyes darkened as he watched, that quiet intensity settling over him like a second skin.
“That’s it. Clean it off.”
He pressed his thumb deeper in my mouth, and I sucked, swirling my tongue around the pad of his finger until every last trace was gone. A rough sound rumbled in his chest. He pulled his hand free then gripped my jaw and tilted my face up so I had no choice but to meet his stare.
“Good girl.”
His body lowered down over mine, heavy and hot without crushing me, surrounding me with his warmth and strength. I felt him press his huge cock against me, and my breath caught, anticipation tightening low in my stomach.
But Ryder didn’t rush. He stayed there, holding himself above me with his arms flexed on either side of my body, his eyes locked with mine as if my reaction mattered more than anything else.
“Look at me.”
I did.
“Keep looking at me.”
His hand slid beneath my thigh, lifting it higher against his hip as he slowly began pressing forward. The thick head of his cock nudged against my pussy then pushed inside, opening me wide.
The first burn of that stretch made my lips part on a shaky breath. He stopped almost immediately, buried only an inch deep, and held there while my body clenched and fluttered around the intrusion.
“You good?”
“Yes.” I shifted beneath him, needing more. “Don’t stop.”
Something darkened in his expression, and he pushed deeper. So slowly I felt every inch of him filling me, my body gradually opening around his thickness until the sensation bordered on too much.
I pulled against the belt again, instinctively wanting my hands on him, and Ryder lowered his mouth to mine.
“Easy,” he murmured against my lips. “I got you.” Then he pushed the rest of the way inside.
A broken moan tore from my throat as my body tightened around him. Ryder groaned, the sound deep and strained, and buried his face against my neck. But he didn’t move. He stayed completely still, one hand gripping my thigh while the other braced beside my head.
“Jesus fucking Christ, Lila.”
I could feel the tension running through his entire body, the restraint it took for him to remain still when I could feel how badly he wanted to move.
I turned my face toward his. “Ryder.”
“So fucking tight.” He lifted his head, his eyes finding mine again. “You okay?”
“Yes.”
“You sure?”
I nodded, then deliberately rolled my hips beneath him.
His eyes closed. “Fuck.” I did it again, and that finally broke him.
Ryder pulled back slowly before sinking into me again, and the second thrust felt completely different now that my body had adjusted to him. Pleasure rolled through me, deep and heavy, and I moaned as he did it again.
He found a rhythm gradually, each stroke slow and controlled at first, giving me time to feel all of him. The belt around my wrists forced me to surrender to the movement instead of reaching for him, leaving me with nothing to do but take everything he gave me.
“Ryder,” I breathed.
His hand tightened around my thigh. “I’m here, sweetheart.”
The words did something to me I couldn’t explain. Yes, he was right there. Just like he had always been.
I lifted my hips to meet his next thrust, and whatever control he had been holding onto began to unravel. His movements grew deeper, harder, more erratic, the bed shifting beneath us as his hand moved to my hip and held me exactly where he wanted me.
The roughness should have felt at odds with the way he kept watching my face, but somehow it didn’t.
Every time my breathing changed, he noticed.
Every time the leather pulled against my wrists, his gaze flicked upward to make sure I was okay.
Even when his control started slipping, some part of him remained completely focused on me.
“You have any idea how many times I thought about this?” he rasped.
My breath caught as his mouth moved along my jaw before settling against my ear.
“How many fucking times I thought about having you underneath me?”
His hips drove forward again, and a moan escaped me. “Ryder—”
“Look at me.”
I opened my eyes to see that his pupils had eaten up his irises.
“You’re mine,” he said, but there was something raw beneath the possessiveness now, something that made the words feel less like a demand and more like a confession.
His thumb brushed my cheek even as his other hand held my hip firmly beneath him.
“Been mine in here for longer than you’ll ever fucking know.
” He pressed his forehead against mine. “Say it.”
My heart slammed against my ribs as I stared up at the man who had been my safest place long before I understood what that meant.
“I’m yours.”
His pace grew more demanding, but even as his control slipped, his attention never left me. One hand stayed firm on my hip while the other slid between us, his fingers finding my swollen clit and rubbing tight, relentless circles that made my entire body tense beneath him.
“Ryder,” I gasped, pulling against the belt as the pressure built too quickly.
“I know, sweetheart.” His breathing was as ragged as my own. “I got you.”
That nearly broke me on its own.
The pleasure kept building until I couldn’t hold it back anymore. I came with a sharp cry, my pussy clenching hard around him as wave after wave tore through me.
Ryder stayed with me through all of it, his movements losing their careful rhythm as my body shook beneath his. His control finally broke moments later.
He buried himself deep with a guttural groan, his body going rigid against mine before shuddering with the force of his release.
For several seconds, neither of us moved.
Ryder’s face remained buried against the side of my neck, his breath hot and uneven against my skin while my heart slowly stopped trying to pound its way out of my chest. The belt still held my wrists above my head, but the moment he lifted himself enough to look at me, his attention went straight to them.
“You okay?”
I nodded, still trying to catch my breath. “More than okay.”
Something almost like relief moved across his face.
He reached up and carefully loosened the leather, taking his time as he freed one wrist and then the other.
The second my arms came down, he rubbed his thumbs over the faint marks left behind, checking my skin before bringing one wrist to his mouth and pressing a kiss against it.
The tenderness of the gesture hit me harder than I expected. This was the same man who had just held me down and demanded I tell him I was his, yet now, he was touching me like he needed to make certain he hadn’t hurt me.
Ryder pulled me against him, and I went willingly, settling against his chest as his arms closed around me. His hand moved slowly down my back in soothing passes while the other wrapped around my waist, holding me securely against him.
Neither of us spoke for a while, and I listened to the steady beat of his heart beneath my cheek as our breathing gradually returned to normal. There should have been awkwardness after everything that had just happened. Questions. Maybe even regret.
But there was none. It all felt so right and… natural.
Ryder pressed his lips to the top of my head and left them there for a long moment. “Been wanting you my whole damn life,” he murmured.
My throat tightened, and I closed my eyes, curling closer to him, soaking up his warmth with my body.
For the first time in years, I didn’t feel alone.