14
“Emma!” Toby and Mandy”s shouts shatter the moment. They rush around the corner to their friend”s aid. When they spot me, they slow down and come to a halt.
“Caleb?” Toby looks at me with a furrowed brow. I raise a hand to signal him that we”re not finished here yet. Then I turn to Emma, who looks back at me with uncertainty, sandwiched between her friends.
“This is what I wanted to hear,” I say gently, wanting to cup her face in my hands and kiss her, when she lets out a regretful sigh.
“Unfortunately, that doesn”t count.”
I move closer to her, sensing that something has changed.
“What do you mean?” A nauseating feeling of foreboding creeps over me.
“Caleb, you should go back to Jessica.”
“Why are you saying this?”
“Because I can”t do this. I”m sorry, but I can”t bear to stand between you two.” I hear the painful tone in her voice, see the suffering look in her eyes.
“This problem can be fixed. I”ll leave her here and now.” It”s the only right thing to do. I don”t care if she then runs to her daddy and tries to turn him against me. I”ve crossed that line definitively. Determined, I push myself off the glass, ready to go upstairs and end the Jessica Flake chapter, when Emma stops me by the arm.
“Wait, Caleb! That wouldn”t change anything. You would have left her because of me because I pushed myself into your relationship. I don”t want that... I can”t do that.” Emma”s last words are no more than a whisper. I see a telltale glint in her eyes. “I”m sorry,” she whispers, stands on tiptoes, and plants a kiss on my cheek. Then she leaves me, head bowed.
“Emma!” I call after her. “Please don”t do this, don”t go!” Desperation courses through my veins, hot and scorching. Toby and Mandy, following their friend, give me a sympathetic look. I run my hands through my hair, not knowing what to do to salvage the situation.
When I eventually hear the car doors of Toby”s SUV slam shut and they drive away from the parking lot, a fuse blows in me. “Goddamn it!” I shout, kicking the trash can in front of the Old Habana out of sheer anger. The force of the blow yanks it out of its anchoring, causing it to crash down with a dull thud. Its contents – a few coffee cups, cans, and other junk – spill out onto the gravel.
“Fuck,” I growl, pacing back and forth in front of the store. Following Emma is pointless. But I also don”t want to go back to the party. I don”t know how I”ll react if I see Jessica”s face again tonight. She called Emma a slit-eyed whore. That damn bitch! No, I can”t possibly go back upstairs. Let them enjoy the playoff party without me. I need to get out of here.
Fishing the key to my bike out of my pocket, I head downstairs to the garage to retrieve my racing bike. There”s only one thing that will help now: alcohol.
***
“Hey Baby, there you are again,” a concerned voice pierces through the fog in my head as I try to lift my eyelids.
“Is he awake?” That”s another, much deeper voice. Slowly, I come to, which feels like emerging from a deep mire. I blink against the veils in front of my eyes. The image sharpens, and I recognize Jess and Parker. They”re standing next to me, by a bed... a hospital bed – in which I”m lying!
“Am I dead?” I ask because that”s exactly how I feel.
“Doesn”t look like it, but it wouldn”t have taken much more,” my buddy explains, shaking his head down at me. “What were you thinking?”
“Thinking about what?” I ask, sitting up, which makes my already pounding head feel like it”s about to explode.
“Caleb, yesterday morning we found you a block away from the Brillant. You had an accident.” The Brillant?Yes, of course, I got wasted there. And then there was this girl dancing on the pole who reminded me of Emma. I wanted to see her, talk to her. So, I got on my bike and... after that, I don”t remember anything.
“Wait a minute! Did you say yesterday? How long was I out?”
“Nearly 36 hours,” Parker explains, making Jess sob beside him.
“I was so worried about you,” she whimpers, stroking my shoulder.
“Jess, I...”
“No,” she interrupts me. “Don”t say anything. I don”t know what got into you that night or what was going on. But I want us to put it behind us.” She tries to smile, stirring up the guilt in me once again. I have to end this, I have to tell her that I don”t feel anything for her anymore. I”m just gathering the courage, about to be honest with her, when there”s a knock on the door.
Toby appears. He sticks his head inside the door and grins when he sees that I”m awake.
“Well, who”s this rising from the dead?” he exclaims with delight, entering the room with Mandy in tow.
“I”ll go get some coffee then,” Jessica announces, a hint of annoyance on her lips. She can”t stand the two of them. That doesn”t surprise me, after all, they”re on Emma”s side.
“Alcohol poisoning, motorcycle accident... Whyler, I”d say you really went overboard. You were damn lucky to walk away from that crash with just a few scrapes,” the Swiss guy remarks, clicking his tongue in reproach and pulling up a chair. “But now tell me, what”s it like to have your stomach pumped? Does it hurt?”
After my closest friends visit me, Coach Thornton, Byers, and some of the other players drop by. The coach gives me a good chewing out for my recklessness and drills into me that a professional athlete doesn”t behave like this. As if I didn”t already know.
I have to stay for two more days for observation, giving me plenty of time to think. First and foremost, it”s clear to me that I will definitely break up with Jessica. It”s over between us. And if her father really decides to kick me off the team just because I dumped her, well, go ahead. Let him try to find a center as good as me. Besides, I”m confident I can find another place to go if needed. I can”t be with a woman I don”t love for the rest of my life just to secure my position on the team.
I”ve learned from Mandy that Emma is gone. She went to Aberdeen for the Christmas holidays and won”t be back until New Year”s Day. Until then, I have enough time to sort everything out here. Christmas is the most wonderful time of the year for Jessica. I don”t want to ruin the holiday for her, which is why I”ve decided to wait until after the festivities. It will still be tough for her when I break up with her, but at least she won”t be drowning in tears on her beloved Christmas.
On December 22nd, the opening of the art exhibition that Jess has been preparing for weeks finally arrives. She”s incredibly nervous, getting her hair, nails, and who knows what else done to look perfect. I”m annoyed that I have to go, so I persuade Parker to accompany me. At 8:00 PM, the exhibition is formally opened by Professor Weinstein in the foyer of the art museum. Jessica”s father has spared no expense or effort to secure the best location for his darling. While Jess talks to potential buyers, Parker and I stroll through the exhibition. None of the paintings speak to me; on the contrary, they bore me. Just like everything here.
“Is everything okay with you?” I feel Parker”s gaze on me and meet his eyes.
“Of course, why do you ask?”
“I don”t know, you”ve been acting a bit different lately. You seem introspective, unhappy.” That hits the nail on the head. Knowing that Emma is in Aberdeen and that I won”t see her before New Year”s is tearing me apart. I want to sort things out between us, convince her that she belongs by my side.
“I have a lot on my mind right now.”
“It”s because of Emma, isn”t it?” I don”t want to answer that, not before I”ve ended things with Jess. “I knew it, it”s because of Emma.” Of course, Parker interprets my silence correctly. “Well, I can understand that. She”s a unique woman. Make sure you don”t make the same mistake I did and lose her,” he says, his mouth forming a sad line.
“I don”t intend to,” I say seriously, turning to the next painting. My gaze falls on the double doors at the entrance, through which Durand has just entered. What does he want here? I watch him suspiciously as he looks around, spots Carl and his wife, and approaches them with a broad smile.
“What”s going on?” Parker must have noticed my furrowed brow. He turns around and follows my gaze. “Why is the Canadian here?”
“Good question. Looks like he”s here to butter up,” I say, wrinkling my nose in distaste, as I watch him kiss Jessica”s mother”s hand. Then he turns his attention to the boss and engages him in conversation.
“That bastard,” my buddy growls. “You do realize he”s after your spot, right?”
“My spot - what do you mean?”
“He wants to dethrone you. Durand thinks he”s the better forward.”
I laugh humorlessly. “That”s ridiculous.”
“It is. But not in his eyes. I”ve been watching him cozy up to Thornton and Mr. Flake for a while now. At first, I thought it was about me that he wanted to replace me as an assistant. But then I overheard him on the phone, saying that the fans will be chanting his name during the entrance next season.” Now, that”s news.
“And why are you telling me this just now?”
Parker shrugs. “I told you; you”ve been acting weird lately. I didn”t want to add this bullshit on top of it.”
I nod and put a hand on his shoulder.
“You know what? Let”s get out of here. I”ve seen enough brown-nosers and bad art for today.”
“But we haven”t even been here for half an hour.”
“I don”t care. I”m fed up. Let”s go play pool.”
“Pool sounds good. Let”s get out of here.” I don”t even try to fight my way through to Jess, who is still occupied by guests. Instead, I send her a text message:
*I”m out, see you later.
Then we make our exit. Parker and I are descending the few steps in front of the brick building when the double doors behind us swing open.
“What”s going on here? You”re not really making a run for it, are you?” Durand stands at the top of the staircase, a smug grin on his face.
“Get lost,” I say, but the Canadian doesn”t back off. He walks alongside us and positions himself in front of me at the foot of the stairs.
“Are you deaf or something? I told you to get lost,” Parker hisses. I can see a muscle in his cheek twitching with anger. Durand remains unfazed, sporting nothing but a mocking grin.
“Poor Jess will be pretty sad when she finds out you”ve bolted.”
“I didn”t bolt,” I reply, unfazed.
“Oh, so you just got tired of her art then? You really have no clue about women.”
That earns him a scoff from me. “You think so? Well, as far as I know, I have a girlfriend, while you recently got shown up by our masseuse.” I know Emma is a sore spot for him, and it”s evident in his expression. “Now get out of my way.” With that, I shove him aside with the back of my arm and continue walking with Parker. I can hear Durand emit a contemptuous snort behind us.
“Don”t try to play the big shot, Whyler. You”d have gotten shot down just the same by Emma. No one lands that arrogant witch. She doesn”t even spread her legs with candy. But hey, you think you”re something special, right?”
Candy? I abruptly stop in my tracks. “Whyler, ignore the jerk. Let”s go,” Parker urges. But it”s too late, all alarms are blaring inside me. Candy – I”m sure that”s the Canadian term for drugs. The evening at the Brillant comes to mind when Emma seemed so out of it. I swallow hard, force myself to stay calm as I turn to face him.
“What did you just say?”
“I said that you think you”re something special.” Durand struts towards me with swaggering steps. “But let me tell you something, you”re not. You…”
“What did you mean by candy?” His furrowed brow shows he has no clue what I”m getting at. “Durand, did you give Emma drugs?” A volcano is about to erupt inside me.
“What?”
“Answer Whyler”s question! Did you give Emma drugs?” In the corner of my eye, I see Parker step up beside me. Now he seems to have grasped the situation as well.
“And what if I did? Man, loosen up, you prudes. I just slipped the little one half a pill in her Long Island. A bit of good mood, that”s all. What”s the big deal? I had a bet to win, after all.” Durand doesn”t see my fist coming. He”s completely unprepared when it hits him on his damn face. I feel his hard jaw beneath my knuckles, hear it crack. My right is followed by my left, burying itself in his stomach and eliciting a choked squeak from him. Durand”s legs give way, folding him like a wet sack.
This miserable piece of shit deserves it! I”m going to finish him!
Parker”s voice reaches my ears as if from a distant place. He”s calling my name, but I don”t care. This bastard here drugged Emma! I lean down to him, claw my fingers into his white polo shirt, ready to deliver the next blow. But before my fist can thunder into his face, I”m yanked back. Slim arms wrap around my upper body from behind, holding me back. I struggle, having only one desire: to beat the shit out of Durand.
“Caleb, calm down. Caleb, damn it!” Parker is trying to soothe me from behind. “Come on, buddy. Stop it, pull yourself together.”
For someone so slender, he”s surprisingly strong. He manages to hold me back enough for Durand to scramble to his feet and put some distance between us.
“You goddamn asshole!” I scream at him, ready to throw myself at Durand again, when a voice makes me pause.
“Caleb!” It”s Jess. “For heaven”s sake, what is going on here?” The horror in her voice makes me calm down. “Caleb, I need to know what”s happening!” she urges, as I don”t respond but instead glare at Durand with a look full of hatred.
“It”s alright. I just gave this loser a beating,” I explain quietly.
“Pah, loser,” Durand taunts and spits blood beside him onto the pavement. “I only see one loser here. And that”s you, Whyler.” His hand points up at Jess, who stands at the entrance, while his hateful gaze remains fixed on me. “You can”t even be honest with your girlfriend. Playing like you love her, while you chase after Emma.”
“The masseuse?” Jessica”s voice sounds panicked.
“That”s right, isn”t it? The slut completely twisted your mind, didn”t she?” As he calls Emma a slut, I try to free myself from Parker”s arms once more.
“You”re digging your own grave here,” my buddy warns, to which Durand only spits on the ground again.
“Caleb, please tell me this isn”t true. You don”t want anything to do with that Asian girl, right?” I lift my gaze to my girlfriend, who comes down the stairs with tears in her eyes. That”s it, this farce ends here and now, I think.
“No,” I reply, breaking free from Parker. He seems to understand that Durand is my last concern right now and that I won”t touch him again. “It”s not true that I chased after Emma,” I say, turning to Jess. “However, it”s true that I want something from her. And I have for a while now.”
“No...” She brings her hands to her mouth. I can see her blinking back tears.
“It”s over between us,” I say, to make this short and painless.
“No, please,” she whispers with a choked voice and reaches out her hand to me. I catch it with mine and look at her seriously.
“I”m sorry, Jessica. I never wanted to hurt you.” Now the dam breaks and she sobs helplessly.
“Well done, asshole,” Parker snaps at Durand. The Canadian”s response is a raised middle finger.
“You can”t do this to me, Caleb, please!” Jess throws herself into my arms and clings to me tightly. Damn it, I knew there would be a scene when I left her. The museum door swings open again. This time it”s Professor Weinstein. I signal to Parker that we need to get out of here. We have to leave before the entire society, including my boss, witnesses this ugly scene.
In the Lucky Saloon, a billiards club, Parker and I find some peace. My phone has rung about twenty times in the ten-minute drive here, so I”ve turned it off. Although I had vowed never to drink alcohol again, I wash down the taste of adrenaline that still lingers on my tongue with beer. I tell Parker how unhappy I”ve been in this relationship for so long that I only didn”t break up with Jess because I was afraid she might tarnish my reputation with Carl. Which, as you can see, I”ve managed just fine on my own. But I don”t want to dwell on that now. We talk about Durand for a while. He”s always been an asshole, but after Emma embarrassed him in front of the team, it”s like he”s dropped his facade. Now he”s showing his true colors once and for all. At some point, we talk about Emma, and I confess that I”ve been blown away by her from the first day, that it”s been hard for me to stay away from her. As I talk about her, I become increasingly aware of how painfully I miss her. And then I realize that I have to have this woman. Come what may. I won”t wait for her to return, and I won”t accept a ‘no’! While I”m sitting with Parker in the Lucky Saloon, I turn my phone back on and send her a text message:
*I”ve left Jessica.
And then I write in a separate message:
*Emma, the only woman in this world that I want is you. I won”t accept your ‘no’ any longer. You belong to me, and you know it.