Chapter 36
Vee
Iwake with a gasp.
Fear overtakes me, and for a moment I don’t know where I am. A sheen of sweat glistens on my body and the sheets are tangled around my legs like restraints.
I’m immediately back in that room. With them. My heart pounds in my chest. A scream works its way up my throat but before I can expel it into the room, my hand slams across my mouth, choking any sound it would’ve made.
No. No. No. That's all I can think other than this isn’t right.
I can’t be back there. My rescue couldn’t have been a dream.
My fingers dig into the soft fabric of my comforter.
My eyes drop down to the emerald sheets and black and emerald comforter.
It’s not the horrid sheet that was in the room. My hands are free and so are my legs.
This is my bed. My room. My apartment.
I force myself to breathe.
In. Out. In again.
Slowly the realization I’m just having a panic attack takes over. As horrible as what happened to me was, it’s over. I’m safe and the people who hurt me won’t be able to do it again.
My brother, Luke, and Josh will make sure of that. I have a gut feeling that I won’t be let out of their sight for a while.
Now that the sound of my heart pounding is no longer taking over me, I can hear it. Voices. Low, deep, and familiar. Their voices are drifting through the cracked door of my bedroom from the living room.
I just sit there listening, trying to make out what they’re saying. But as hard as I try, it’s too hard to make out. I know it has to be about me and their plans for Abraham and his son. I still haven’t decided what I want to do.
I throw the blankets back and swing my legs over the side of the bed. My legs feel weak when I stand and I drop back down onto the edge. I take a few deep breaths and then stand again. The hallway light creeps into the room, lighting my way as I quietly cross the room.
The door doesn’t make a sound as I open it wider, step into the hall, and make my way to the living room.
I see them there. Luke and Luca are sitting at my dining room table.
“Luca,” my voice cracks as my eyes tear up. All hopes of being strong fade away.
My brother’s head snaps up and before I can say anything else, I’m moving.
He’s doing the same. He stands so quickly the chair falls backward, and he’s headed to me.
We crash into each other, our arms wrapping around the other.
His arms tighten around me, crushing me to his chest like he’s afraid I might disappear again.
“I’ve got you,” he murmurs roughly against my hair. And then his voice breaks. I can hear him holding back the tears. “I’m so damn sorry, VeeVee. I’m sorry they took you. I’m sorry you got hurt. I’m sorry I never thought he would still be an issue…that he’d still be looking for you.”
The words shatter something inside me. My fingers grasp the back of his shirt as a heart wrenching sob rips from my chest.
“I thought…” My voice shakes violently. “I thought I wasn’t getting out. That they were going to…” I can’t even finish that sentence because I know if they didn’t show when they did, that they were going to rape me repeatedly.
His arms tighten around me, comforting me. “You’re here,” he whispers. “You’re safe. That’s all that matters.”
We just stand there like that, holding on to each other while we both cry. My big bad MC brother is crying. Neither of us wanting to let go of the other, but eventually we pull apart, both of us wiping the tears from our faces.
But standing just behind Luca is Luke, waiting for his chance to hold me. His eyes soften when they meet mine, and he steps past Luca and wraps his arms around me. I melt into his embrace. He pulls me close, one hand cradling the back of my head as if he’s shielding me from the world.
“You’re safe,” he murmurs into my ear.
I breathe him in. The familiar scent of his leather cut, the smell of cigarette smoke. He tends to smoke when he’s stressed. Or worried.
We stay like that and he releases my head, and I tilt my chin up to him as he kisses me softly on the lips. Being careful not to press too hard.
“Where’s Josh?”
Luke brushes the pad of his thumb gently along my cheek.
“He ran to his place to grab some clothes and a few things,” he says. “Once he’s back I’m doing the same.”
“Clothes?” I ask, confused.
“Neither of us plan on leaving you. So we’re moving in.” He winks.
Moving in. Do I want that?
I do.
I nod slowly
I don’t even have to give it another thought. Being alone isn’t something I want. It’s the two of them. And they want me. Most of all, they’re okay with sharing.
My heart cracks, wishing that Hank could want the same but he doesn’t and I need to respect that. He’s made it clear he’s moving on, no matter how much I love him.
Luke guides me over to the couch, his hand resting lightly on my back the entire way like he doesn’t trust me not to disappear either. I lean into him, letting him be the rock that I need.
“Sit,” he says softly as he eases me down.
He disappears into the kitchen and comes back a moment later with a mug. The smell of coffee curls into the air as he presses it into my hands and sits down beside me.
The warmth seeps into my shaking fingers. For a few minutes we just sit there. No one says anything. Just silence.
Then Luca sits down on the coffee table in front of me and leans forward slightly, his forearms resting on his knees.
“We’ve got the men who took you,” he says carefully. “They’re locked in the basement.”
My stomach twists.
“What do you want to do about them?” he asks me. The question hangs heavily in the air.
My eyes drop down and I stare into my coffee as if it holds the answers I’m looking for. I bite on the tender flesh on the inside of my jaw. He wants to know if I want to be involved in their deaths, not if I want them to die or not.
“I want to talk to Ash. She’s been through this before.”
Luca nods slowly.
“I figured you might,” Luke speaks up.
My brows pull together, confused how he’d know that.
“She’s already on the way,” he adds.
“I’m going to head back to the Hellions clubhouse and check on our guests and release Hank from babysitting duty for a while.
Maybe have a little fun with them.” Luca winks.
“Just let me know what you decide, and I’ll be back later to check on you.
” He leans in and kisses me on the forehead before standing and leaving me alone with Luke.
“Want to watch something on TV?” he asks. “Maybe something funny or mindless reality TV. I know you like that.”
“Can we watch Traitors?” I ask, pulling my feet up onto the couch, taking a small swallow of my coffee.
Luke leans forward picking up the remote from the coffee table and leans back, stretching his right arm out on the back of the couch. He turns the TV on and goes to the streaming app. I set my coffee on the table and scoot over, nestling my body against his.
This moment feels perfect.
About twenty minutes later I feel Luke’s phone vibrate on the couch where he put it. Picking it up he looks at the screen before busting out laughing.
“What’s funny?” I ask him.
He tilts the phone my way so I can read the message.
Mack: We’re here. Using Ash’s key.
Mack: Ash says that's your warning to have your dick put away.
Fucking Ash. I’ve loved that woman since the first time I met her at Hell’s Desire.
A couple of minutes later, there’s a quick knock on the door, before I hear the key in the keyhole. Ash doesn’t hesitate when she sees me on the couch. She crosses the room, dropping down beside me and pulls me into a tight hug.
When we finally separate, she tilts her head toward the hallway.
“Come on. Let’s go to your room and talk in private. Let these two catch up on club business.”
She takes my hands, helping me to stand and we head down the hallway to my bedroom. Once we’re inside, she shuts the door behind me. Her eyes drift to where I’m sitting on the unmade bed, and she wrinkles her nose.
“What?”
She just points at the bed. “I don’t want to sit in anyone’s bodily fluids.”
I shake my head, laughing at her. “It was just me. I just woke up not long ago.”
Happy with my answer she moves across the room dropping down on the bed beside me. She pulls her legs up and for a second neither of us speaks as I shift my body so I can face her.
Then the question bursts out of me.
“How did you do it?”
Her brow furrows slightly.
“How did I do what?”
“What you did,” I say quietly. “When you… killed him. You know.”
She studies me carefully before answering. It’s like she’s thinking about how she’s going to respond.
“It wasn’t really a choice in the moment it happened,” she says after a pause. “I knew I needed to do it if I wanted to feel safe again. And for me, being part of killing him is what I neeed.”
“Do you think about it all the time?” I ask. “I know you never mention it. Not since you shared it with me and Arizona.”
She shakes her head slowly.
“No. But I do live with the knowledge that I took someone’s life.” Her gaze holds mine as she tilts her head to the side, pulling her bottom lip into her mouth. “At the same time,” she continues, “I know I couldn’t live the rest of my life looking over my shoulder either.”
I just let what she’s telling me sink in.
“For me,” she says quietly, “it was the right choice. I know you have a choice to make. What I did might not be the right one for you. And that’s okay.”
“I know.”
She reaches over, taking my hands in hers.
“You need to do what you feel comfortable with, Vee.”
I feel the tear sliding down my face, and I let go of one of her hands so I can wipe it away.
“Whether you take part in it or not, Vee, the men who did this to you aren’t leaving that basement alive. And whatever you choose,” she adds, “your men will accept it.”
Silence stretches between us. Then she pulls me into a hug. Her arms are warm and reassuring. I know what I’m going to tell them and I know they will accept it, just like Ash says they will.