13. Chapter 13
thirteen
Sor’en
My mate smells of yur’pala sap and me. Sickly sweet, rich sap elders get drunk on and heady florals that can only come from a botanist. It’s an intoxicating mixture, almost strong enough to make me ignore the agonizing ache in my bones for a while more.
Hue is awake, she has been glaring at me for nearly the entire time I’ve lain here in the grass, tangled around her, pretending to still be asleep.
I changed forms…
It is a most unseemly affair. Two males being so close to my unbonded mate in such a small frame of time had twisted my mind into something wretched.
It is seldom a Xyrelith takes on their dark form…
even rarer do they come back from it without a blaster shot lodged in their skulls. My mate has saved me, saved many today.
My brave, perfect mate.
I bite back a groan, not because of the pain, which is immense, but because I can still taste her on my tongue.
My odd little human is the sweetest thing I have ever consumed.
Even in that barbaric form, it was not lost on me the way she surrendered.
The way she bucked and spread even through her confusion, my mate opened for me.
That will bode well for us during the vigil.
I open my eyes fully and am greeted by the pale, rich sky, deep purple and green clouds gathering to water my fields.
Pheor'aya, Fam'ora, no doubt looking down on their most interesting play toy with humor and dread.
My eyes find my mate next, although I have been stealing glances for a while now.
Her pretty greenish and golden eyes are twisted into a deep frown.
The small, odd human body her soul inhabits is tight, but she leans on me, using me to support her insignificant weight.
Her delicate, stubby arms crossed, hiding her breasts from me.
It is said human younglings suckle from their mother's breasts.
Xyrelith females do not have breasts like humans, but I imagine the toxin sharing is about the same.
“We need to talk,” she offers, not releasing me from her pretty disapproval.
“Yes, my mate. It would seem so,” I groan as I untangle myself from her, standing to my full height, the weight of my own exhaustion making me unsteady, but I right myself in front of her.
She would no doubt disapprove of her mate even more if she thought me weak.
Before she can protest, I lift her into my arms and head for the inside of our home, Melion lingering off to the side, beaming with his approval before he heads for his fields.
I have no doubt he stood guard over us while we slept. If she managed any at all.
My mate is quiet and angry, so her usual self, as I deposit her in front of the cleansing unit, her breath a sharp gasp that makes me smirk as I rid myself of what remains of my clothes. My cock starts up its vibration, already at full mast for the alluring human.
I don’t move as her gaze follows the tailored length of my body, even when my entire being wants to tremble with exhaustion, I stand taller for her, letting her look her fill.
My pores are raw and aching from the constant production of bonding oil and would certainly be reddened if not for the hue of my flesh.
When her eyes meet my vibrating shaft, her plush lips part before slamming closed again, her cheeks flushing to denote her pleasure.
My cock jerks at her attention, eager to show my adorable little mate that I can do far more than cause pain.
Although I’m sure she already has a good idea of that now.
She clears her throat, her eyes slamming to me, cheeks flushing even deeper, having been caught staring. “You, uh…”
The rest of her words are so soft and mumbled that I can’t decipher them over the cleansing unit. “Louder, Draya’la,” I remind her, not bothering to mask the growl in my voice.
She swallows hard, shifting on her bare feet. Letting her hair fall over her face as she dips her head to stare at them. “This… bonding vigil. You need it to live?”
I sigh, dreading this conversation, but I answer it honestly nonetheless, as I should’ve done days ago. “No, the wider galaxies need it to live.”
That gets her attention. Her eyes find me again before I step fully into the unit, the distance between us a physical blade shoved deep into my aching bones.
I take a second to test the scalding water before I explain, sending a silent plea up to our goddesses to grant me the mercy of this female.
“It is why the Sentient Bond Recognition Act applied to us, my sweet one.
Xyreliths are often mated within their own kind.
It is not rare like some others. We are a dual-nature species, as you can see. It is… unbalanced—"
“Unbalanced, you keep saying that, but what does it mean?”
“It keeps us level. We are every bit as dangerous as we are said to be, but by nature, by moral, and spirt, we abhor violence. That does not mean it does not come as naturally to us as breathing.”
Water slicks down my face as I glance at my female, lowering herself to the floor in front of the open-door unit, listening intently, her hand clasped on that necklace. The pretty battle scar she wears underneath it begging to be kissed by me.
“We worship goddesses, twins, sisters, two halves of the same deadly coin.
Pheor'aya is hate, darkness, vengeance, and agony.
Her sister, Fam'ora, is her opposite in every way.
Life, light, kindness, and pleasure. One cannot exist without the other.
When the goddesses bled the sky of its waters and created the first Xyrelith, a male, he was too much within himself and could not release himself from his lesser form.
He needed to be balanced, another half to complete his whole so—"
“So, they made him a mate,” she adds.
I offer her a soft smile. “They offered me you.” Her gaze lingers on my tapered waist, my vibrating cock making the water droplets spin off at odd angles as it reaches toward my lower stomach, inviting its perfect hole to come and explore it.
“So, once you find your mate, if you don’t bond, you guys become your other form?”
Another deep sigh leaves me as I gather cleansing gel made from the flowers outside our home in my palm.
For this part, I cannot bring myself to look at my female.
“We are mastered as a child. We learn to control ourselves from birth, as our own toxins are lethal even to us as younglings. When we are gifted our mates, it is because we have reached a state of internal balance worthy of them.” Except for me, that is…
“It is a double-edged sword. From the moment we see our mate, their death aura is blank to our eyes, and we are no longer a single entity but the half of her whole. We lose the ability to balance without the other. In scientific terms, once bonded, separation causes neurochemical instability, leading to madness from which we cannot recover.”
I cannot hear her shuddering breath as much as I feel the pungent dread filling the room.
“And this bonding?”
“It is the unification of two souls weary from surviving adrift for so long…” My jaw clenches as hot rivulets run down my spines. “It is the greatest honor, Hue. It is something we ache for from the day we are old enough to feel the weight of imbalance. It’s a chance to rest.”
She is silent, and I would much prefer to hear her cutting tongue.
The next words to leave my mouth taste like acid, putrid and gutting, but I force them out anyway. “I do not expect this of you, Hue. I have taken you wrongly, lied, and omitted. The goddesses were cruel, confused when they thought me ready. I am not a balanced male, I never will be, I am—”
“I’ll do it.”
My hands falter as they work my hair, my head snapping toward my female. “What?”
She moves her shoulders up and down in an odd gesture, her palm clasping and squeezing that tooth so hard I’m afraid it will puncture her delicate skin. “We can’t very well have you running around juicing yourself out at every turn. There will be nobody to take care of the flowers.”
My entire being stills, a deceitful swell building in my chest. Because she has left something unsaid, because my mate is lying. “But you still wish to leave me.”
Her bottom lip wobbles, making my chest ache. “It's not you.”
“It’s Lunareth.” I have never wanted to witness the annihilation of a planet so horribly. “Tell me why.” I snarl. “Why does this planet please you so much more than mine?”
I do not hear the words she whispers, but she shakes her head.
My mind is reeling, so much hope, so much adoration wasted. “I cannot take you there, human. It is highly protected airspace. They would—"
“Hey, it’s okay,” she offers, but she is crying with her eyes on the ground in front of her. She comforts me, and it's like a spark to a flame.
Darkness pulses within me again, deep and swirling. It whispers horrible, cruel things. “It is not okay if my mate leaves me,” I growl. My body tenses with the desire to rip her from the floor, to meld our forms, to render her mindless and compliant.
It would be so easy… to keep her docile.
But I like her unbalanced moods. I enjoy her frowns and—
“What if I came back?” Hue’s shoulders shake with the force of her cries, and I want to grab her, but I do not have control.
I cannot.
One mistake…
My mate is human, not Xyrelith. She cannot fight off my toxins; she cannot protect herself.
She needs me, but this… rejection, this lethal consolation in my chest aches like a veil blade.
My voice is cruel, harsher than I mean for it to be when I speak.
“What if I cut a limb from your body, so long as I reattach it later? I could give you everything, Hue. Credits, life, love, and devotion. Anything you want, but I will not allow you to leave me. If you hate me for it, so be it. You will not make it off this planet again. I would sooner guide us to the dirt.”
I do not look at her as she scrambles to her feet, bolting from the wasting room.
An enraged snarl leaving my throat as my fist finds the unit wall, making rock crumble around my boned knuckles.
My body trembles as I release toxins strong enough to wipe out a Bhaurnul army.
My rage is not for my mate; only my pain is reserved for her.
No, my rage is solely for whatever it is that keeps her affections from me.
From that tooth around her neck and the cruel goddesses in the sky.