Chapter Sixteen
Have a little faith.
Wilder hadn’t believed in faith for a long time. The weeks ticked on by, and he couldn’t help but admit they were the best moments of his life. Even before his parents passed, he never felt like this. It was consuming.
He woke up every morning, and when he turned to see Poppy, she calmed the beast within him.
Wilder always thought he controlled the beast, but the truth was, Poppy did.
His bear found a sense of peace with Poppy he’d never experienced before, and it felt incredible.
Every second with her was a breath of fresh air.
Then of course, the problem. Alder had gotten into his head. Now as he looked at his woman, and the fact she grew bigger every single day concerned him. That worry was becoming bone-deep, and he couldn’t ignore it.
She was getting bigger and bigger, month by month.
Their baby was growing, and she glowed. There were some nights he woke up in a cold sweat, because of the nightmares he had.
The fear his child might tear through his woman’s body, killing her, terrified him.
He found it hard to focus, and he knew he was upsetting Poppy with his lack of communication.
What was he supposed to tell his woman? Pregnancy was an amazing time, a beautiful experience.
Not one filled with fear as every second passed.
He didn’t go looking for Alder. Instead, he did something he hadn’t done in a very long time. He went in search of his parents’ belongings, looking for any source of diary, or anything that might help him to think, or figure this shit out.
Nothing was helping. His parents didn’t keep any journals, no notes of passing pregnant females.
Many days Poppy was busy with the garden, as she’d taken to wild living so beautifully.
Some mornings, he’d come back and find her canning and preserving their fruits and vegetables.
They had yet to go into town, but they would need to soon, as they were getting low on staples.
He’d make the trip alone as he didn’t want to worry Poppy with the poachers or push her body too hard in her condition.
Wilder stood out on the porch as Poppy’s arms circled his waist. “You know, you’re not fooling anyone,” Poppy said.
He tensed up.
“You’re wanting to go to the store without me because you’re worried I’m going to do too much.”
He turned and wrapped an arm around her shoulders. “You’re right. That’s it.”
“Don’t worry. I know we’re going to need some stuff soon. I don’t mind staying here. I’m going to harvest some more pumpkins, and then I’ll grab the last of the cabbages. I’m thinking tonight we could have a hearty soup, what do you think?” she asked, moving away from him to grab her basket.
She was dressed in a flannel shirt and a large pair of sweats he’d gotten for her. She looked so cute with her Wellington boots, and she had a handkerchief on her head, holding her hair back. Poppy looked every part the country girl—ready, prepared, and pregnant.
Poppy reached out and took his hand. “You do know it’s going to be all right,” she said.
This was his curse. It had to be. He’d never cared about humans, and in fact, didn’t even feel guilty about killing them, yet he was looking at his woman, his reason for getting up in the morning, and breathing. She could die, and it might be all his fault.
“How are you feeling?” he asked.
“I’m feeling great,” Poppy said. “But watch this.” She called him over as they made their way toward the bees.
Usually, Poppy made him go straight ahead so they knew not to sting her, however, fear gripped him as she stood amongst the bees, and there was not a sting at all. They treated her as if she were a bear.
“How cool is that?” Poppy asked.
She stepped away. “I don’t like to get too close, just in case they change their mind.” She let out a giggle. “I figure they’ve come to realize I’m not going to hurt them. What do you think?”
His child was stopping them from hurting her.
His child was a bear.
He had to be cursed to finally find love, and now, it was going to be stripped away.
“Wilder, are you okay?” Poppy asked. “I thought you would love this because it means I can help you out a lot more.” She moved to step in front of him.
“I’ve got to head into town,” he said. “There are a few supplies we need.” He looked at her, and then closed the distance, gripping the back of her neck, pulling her in for a kiss. His son or daughter was growing, and they were a bear. His baby was going to kill his only love.
He reluctantly pulled away, and made his way toward his truck, which he only ever took out for special occasions. Climbing into the truck, he took off, getting onto the main road, and then drove all the way toward the main grocery store, only he didn’t stop there. He kept driving.
For over an hour he drove before finally pulling up in the middle of nowhere.
There were no passing cars or trucks, or pedestrians.
He’d come to this place many times, as it was on the verge, where you could see the forest far and wide.
From this angle, it didn’t look scary. It looked ...
peaceful. No one knew of the dangers lurking beneath when you were standing on the outskirts looking in.
Wilder lived for this, he relished it. This was his life.
This was who he was. There was no shame in it.
And yet, he felt so fucking angry. Finally, he found a woman that was all his, and he had no way of knowing if she was going to survive the pregnancy.
How could he love a child that killed its mother?
Wilder did something he hadn’t done since he was a lot younger and lost his mother.
Tears gathered in his eyes, blurring his vision.
He couldn’t tell Poppy the truth. It would scare her, and she needed to be afraid, but he couldn’t bring himself to do it.
Not to her. It wasn’t right. Nor was it fair.
He loved her more than anything in the world, and she was going to be taken from him.
Life was so fucking cruel.
****
Poppy was not an idiot, nor a fool. The way Wilder reacted with the bees told her all she needed to know. The bees’ newfound liking to her was not because she was kind to them. The baby inside her was changing her.
She had the morning sickness, the aching body, the sore breasts, and the cravings.
Wow, the cravings were something strange.
She wanted peanut butter spread over a steak with lots of whipped cream.
There was even a hint of chocolate sauce as well.
This would make total sense if it was to go with ice cream.
She didn’t want the ice cream. Her only interest was the steak.
It made no sense to her, yet that was exactly what she wanted.
They were just some of the mild cravings she got.
Never mind the honey. Now she understood Wilder’s infatuation with it.
Then she’d noticed her yearning for the forest. She didn’t want to go running, because she never wanted to run in her life.
What she craved was to feel it beneath her feet.
Sink her toes into the world and just bask.
Some nights she would dream of running, of feeling the cold air across her furred back, and she felt like this was her child.
She didn’t know if she was pregnant with a son or daughter. It didn’t matter.
The other strangest feeling—she was pretty sure she heard either her child’s bear, or Wilder’s. Sometimes the word “mine” whispered in her mind.
She sensed more than she actually heard. Was it Wilder? Was it her child? She didn’t know, she only knew she wasn’t afraid. There was no harm to her.
She put her hand on her swollen stomach and stepped onto the porch, to look out toward the setting sun. It was cold, and usually she would grab a blanket to keep warm, but just recently, she hadn’t needed it. She wasn’t getting as cold as she used to.
Wilder was getting more and more withdrawn as the days went forward.
He’d stopped making love to her, even though she knew he woke with an arousal, and some mornings, it was like he would forget.
He’d put his hand on her hip, kiss her neck, thrust his aroused cock against her ass, and then his hand would shift, he’d touch her swollen stomach, and it seemed to instantly repel him.
She didn’t know how to get through to him, to make him understand that everything was going to be fine. She knew it deep in her heart.
“Your daddy loves you very much,” she said, putting a hand to her stomach. But did he really? Did he regret the pregnancy?
It was getting dark and late. Finally, she had no choice but to step inside their home. She closed and locked the door, and made her way toward the soup. She’d already made bread rolls, and they were still warm, cooling down on the counter.
The dogs were fed. The house was clean. There was nothing else for her to do other than sit and eat, which she did.
She decided to not wait for Wilder, and instead, grabbed a bowl and got a nice couple of ladles of soup.
She’d been stewing the meat for most of the day, and it was on the bone, so she shredded it off.
It was so tender. Then, she added the vegetables back in, with lots of herbs and seasonings.
She made her way toward Wilder’s chair and took a seat.
This is where she liked to sit when she was enjoying her soup, especially when he wasn’t here himself. She missed him, so very much.
Wrapping the blanket around her body, she snuggled in and ate her food, hearing the old ticking clock. It was so quiet, besides the dogs’ snores, which were just adorable.
Poppy had just finished her food, when there was a sudden booming knock on the door, startling her.
Fester growled toward the door, and Poppy got to her feet. She walked to the kitchen to put away her bowl, and then made her way toward the front door. She knew it was a bear. This was not Wilder, though.
“Let me in,” the male voice said. “I know you’re in there.”
“If you’re looking for Wilder, he’s not home,” Poppy said.
“Fine, I’m looking for you.”
“I don’t know who you are.”
“Open the fucking door now.”
Poppy stepped away from the door.
“Damn it, I just, look, I know you’re pregnant, and I know you’re human, Poppy. My name is Alder, and I’m an acquaintance of Wilder’s.” He said all this from the other side.
He’d mentioned Alder, and that he’d been working with poachers. She put a hand on her stomach.
“I’ve been doing some studying and some research. You’re pregnant with Wilder’s child, and I’m guessing right around now, you’re sensing a whole lot of different things.”
Poppy didn’t like that he seemed to know more about her than even Wilder did. She didn’t trust him.
“Are you afraid? Right now? Are you afraid of me?”
It was on the tip of her tongue to tell him to leave, but she stopped herself and just waited. Was she afraid? No, she wasn’t. Was this her own stupidity, or was this her child’s thoughts and feelings?
“Your instincts are right.”
“You hate humans,” Poppy said. “And I may be pregnant with Wilder’s baby, but I am still human.”
“I know, and trust me, I’m sorry. Look, I had some beliefs but things happened that ... shattered them.”
There was something in his voice that made her open the door, and she looked to see a rather unkempt man. He had a lot of facial hair, and his eyes were bloodshot.
“Did you know what Wilder was when you met him?” Alder asked.
“I didn’t have a clue. He saved me from the poachers because I’d gotten evidence of them killing a bear.”
Alder growled and Poppy stepped out of the way as he brushed past her. She looked at the door, and then toward him, and she pushed the door closed. There was no way to get in touch with Wilder.
Alder sniffed the air. “Something smells good.”
“It’s soup,” she said. Before she got a chance to offer him a bowl, he immediately went to it and started to eat from the pan where it was still simmering. “You, of course, can have some.” She held her hand out, but there was no point in directly offering, seeing as he had already taken a bowl.
“I told them not to kill the fucking bears. Wilder was right to kill them. Fuck me, that is good. You cooked this?” he asked, glancing over his shoulder to look toward her.
“Yes.” She also jerked her head in a nod. “You didn’t think I could cook?”
“I didn’t expect humans to do ... anything good.”
“You’ve had an awful experience, haven’t you?” she asked.