Chapter 19
Janey
The living room is quiet, except for the low hum of sports highlights on the TV.
I’m curled up on the big leather couch between Mason and Brookes, exactly where I’ve started to crave being every evening.
My head rests against Brookes’s shoulder while Mason’s hand absently strokes my thigh.
The warmth of their bodies on either side of me should be comforting.
Instead, I’m still reeling.
My hand rests protectively over my belly, fingers tracing small, unconscious circles. I keep thinking about Angela Fletcher’s clouded eyes locking onto me, pointing straight at my stomach, and saying “the baby” as though she could see right through me. I’m barely showing. How did she know?
The memory won’t leave me alone.
Mason laughs at what’s on the screen and squeezes my thigh. “You alright, sweetheart?” he asks softly, noticing my distraction.
I nod, forcing a small smile. “Just thinking.”
Brookes presses a kiss to the top of my head. “You’ve been quiet since we got back. Want to talk about it?”
“No.”
He nods and doesn’t pry any further, and I’m grateful. Their mom gave the baby a name. A sweet name. Melissa. She took a step I haven’t even thought about making because I’m so wrapped up in the explosive impact this situation is going to have on my life.
All the things I should be feeling are lingering behind the wall of my own creation. I pull my hand from my stomach, fearful that touching myself there will somehow bond me further to a baby that…
My train of thought is interrupted by my phone vibrating on the coffee table. The screen shows “Mom.” My stomach drops instantly.
I don’t want to answer it. I really don’t. But if I ignore her, she’ll keep calling. Then she’ll start texting. Then she’ll call Joelle or someone else until she gets answers. That’s how she operates. If she digs too far, she’ll end up unearthing the very thing I don’t want her to know.
I sit up and grab the phone with a shaky hand. Both men go still beside me, sensing the shift in my energy.
I answer on the fourth ring. “Hi, Mom.”
“Janey Marie, where are you?” Her voice is sharp, already laced with disapproval. “I drove by your house twice today, and your car wasn’t there. And why on earth were you spotted at that care home in Rockwell this afternoon?”
My mouth goes dry. Gossip travels faster than the wind here.
“I… I’m staying with friends for a little while,” I say carefully, trying to keep my voice even.
“Friends?” She scoffs. “Who? And who was the man you were with? Someone said you were holding his hand. Janey, what's going on? Why aren’t you at work? I called the clinic, and they said you took two weeks off. Two weeks!”
I close my eyes. Mason’s hand finds mine and squeezes gently. Brookes shifts closer, his presence solid and grounding. She called my work? This is crazy.
“Mom, I needed some time off. I’ve been… tired. But I’m fine. Everything’s okay.”
“Don’t you ‘everything’s okay’ me, Janey. You don’t take time off work. That isn’t like you. And who is this man? Are you seeing someone? Because if you’re involved with someone and hiding it from me—”
My chest tightens as the familiar mix of guilt and resentment rises so fast it makes me dizzy.
“I’m not hiding anything,” I lie softly. “I needed a break. I’m staying with Joelle’s family for a bit. That’s all.”
There’s a heavy pause on the other end. I can practically hear her dissecting every word, looking deep for the lie.
“Joelle’s family,” she repeats, unconvinced.
“Yes.”
“And whose hand were you holding?”
“No one, Mom. Whoever saw me must have been mistaken.”
She doesn’t answer, leaving the hum of the telephone line to communicate her disbelief and disapproval.
“I want to meet this man, Janey. You know how people talk. You can’t afford to be careless.”
“I’m okay, Mom,” I murmur, the words automatic.
“You know I only want what’s best for you.”
“I know.” It’s said out of training, not real belief. She wants what’s best for her, and the version of me she feels she owns. But she doesn’t know the real me. She doesn’t care what I want if it differs from the life she has mapped out in her head.
I gulp around the tightness in my throat, making an audible click of emotion.
“Just remember, Janey. One mistake, and everything is ruined.”
“I know, Mom.”
One mistake. One step out of line. Once risk taken.
That ship has sailed.
When I hang up, the silence in the room feels leaden. I set the phone down with a trembling hand and lean forward, elbows on my knees, trying to breathe through the knot in my chest.
Mason’s big hand rubs slow circles on my back. “She doesn’t know yet?”
I shake my head. “No. But someone saw us at the care home.”
Brookes gently pulls me back against his chest, wrapping both arms around me. “We’re right here.”
I nod, but the anxiety lingers. My mother’s voice echoes in my head, demanding explanations I’m not ready to give.
My hand drifts to my belly again.
This baby isn’t just going to change my life. It’s going to blow my entire world apart.
And I still don’t know if I’m brave enough to let it.