Chapter 13
Lilias
NO FRIENDS INSIDE THESE WALLS
“Are they done?” I whisper to Anura.
She nods, and I exhale with relief. Anura woke me up this morning with hot tea and buttered toast, then led me into the adjoining room for a hot bath. I panicked when I heard voices through the closed door, but Anura assured me they were just there to inspect the sheet.
Of course. Memories of last night come back in sharp flashes, like shards of broken glass. The snake on his knees, making the bed shake and squeal beneath him. The flash of his knife. The dark spread of blood on the sheet.
I was supposed to bleed. I had bled, a little, after the first time I pushed Blayne past the stopping point.
But Blayne assured me that Prince Laurance of Ethiria wouldn’t care about such technicalities, that his kingdom had moved past the primitive custom of displaying the bloody sheet for the king’s approval.
I didn’t marry Laurance.
So why did the snake do that? Was it worth cutting his own skin to make the world think he’d consummated our marriage?
And why didn’t he want to consummate our marriage? What was so offensive about me and those stupid strips of red cloth? Why would he rather take a knife to himself than put his cock between my legs?
I climb out of the bath, which has gone cold, and wrap a towel around my body with trembling fingers.
I feel raw and jagged, like I’ve been pulled too thin.
I pull on a clean dressing gown, then sit on a bench before a mirror as Anura brushes my hair.
I wonder if someone is on the other side of that mirror too, watching me in my dressing gown.
Well, at least the people examining the bed have gone.
Anura opens the door to the massive room with its massive bed, and I come to my feet to follow her.
The bed has been neatly remade, the curtains drawn back, and the windows opened.
A soft breeze carries the sound of birdsong into the room.
Aside from the churn in my stomach and the weak tremble in my arms, it’s like last night never even happened.
Good. Let’s leave it like that.
Anura pulls out one of the dresses I brought from Marion, dark blue velvet with a high enough neckline that men look me in the eyes while I’m wearing it, and then she helps me slip it over my dressing gown.
She’s quiet this morning, and I’m deeply grateful for her in a way I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to put into words.
Just existing is hard enough right now; I couldn’t handle talking about it.
Anura finishes lacing up the back of the dress, and I turn to face my reflection in the massive mirror that’s apparently also a window. It’s strangely bolstering to be wearing something familiar again. I rub my hands against the skirt and remind myself that it’s not going to be like this forever.
My brother is coming. Blayne is coming. It won’t be just me and Anura in this horrible castle forever.
I walk to the row of tall windows and stare out at what looks like an elegant walled garden. Anura comes to stand next to me, and I put my arm through hers, just like I did when we were kids and I pretended she was my big sister.
“Do you have any idea when Elrick will arrive?” she finally asks, in a low voice.
I smile. She’s been infatuated with my brother since childhood.
“I could ask you the same thing,” I reply. “He writes to you more than he writes to me.”
Her cheeks darken, a sure sign I’m telling the truth. She opens her mouth, but the door slams behind us before she can speak. I turn slowly, fear pulling at the back of my neck.
My husband stands in the doorway.
He hesitates on the threshold, almost as if he’s waiting to be invited inside. Which is ridiculous. This is his room. Hells, it’s probably one of several, given he didn’t come back here last night.
Maybe there’s someone else in his life. It makes sense, although it also makes me feel like I’m going to be sick.
“Good morning,” he finally says, without moving.
“Good morning,” I reply.
Anura meets my gaze and raises an eyebrow, asking if she should leave. I shake my head. My husband clears his throat, then enters the room cautiously, like he’s checking for traps.
“Come with me,” he says. “I would like to show you the castle.”
I frown. What’s going on? Does he need to say something that can’t be overheard? Well, he’s just going to have to get used to Anura, then.
“Please,” he adds.
I glance down, then run my hands over my skirt. “Fine,” I reply.
“Shall I join you?” Anura asks.
The snake winces like that suggestion hurts. And doubt curls inside me like smoke. Perhaps I shouldn’t push things too far. I shake my head at her.
“That won’t be necessary,” I say.
With that, I cross the room. My husband offers me his arm, and I take it. I try not to look at him, but I can’t help the flash of memory. His naked chest in the candlelight. The look of shock when I took the piece of cake from the end of his sword.
He clears his throat as he leads me out of the room and down the hallway.
“I trust you had a pleasant night,” he says in a cold voice.
I could almost laugh. Instead, I force myself to smile sweetly.
“Which part?” I ask.
He meets my gaze for a heartbeat. His lips twist into something that’s not quite a smile. We walk together through a pair of open doors and onto a gravel path that leads to the garden I saw through the windows of his room.
“The gardens are usually safe,” he says in a low voice. “Too much effort to eavesdrop out here.”
“Unlike your room,” I reply.
He says nothing, and I remind myself that it’s technically my room as well. Our feet crunch against the gravel as he leads me past another empty fountain and several beds of dark, freshly turned earth. The garden slowly gets wilder, until we’re walking beneath a row of gnarled fruit trees.
“This is the way to the stables,” he says.
My breath catches. I know more about the stables of Ethiria than I do about Prince Laurance, the man I was supposed to marry.
I’d already decided which horses from Marion I wanted to bring with me and what lines from Ethiria I wanted to breed.
And I spent more hours than I want to admit fantasizing about riding along the cliffs of Ethiria and feeling the ocean wind in my hair.
But the snake doesn’t know that. He can’t.
No, he’s just trying to make conversation. Out here, where we can’t be overheard. I make a soft noise in the back of my throat, a little purr that he can take as agreement. His hand closes over mine.
“I’m never intimate with people who are drunk or drugged,” he says in that same even voice, as if he were pointing out another path through the garden.
I trip over my own feet, then catch myself. This time, I don’t make a little purr of agreement.
“I dislike drugs,” he continues, with a bit of an edge to his voice.
“After last night,” I reply, “I would have to agree with you.”
He catches my eye, then turns away. For some reason, I remember the look on his face when I told him I loved snakes. Would I have been so bold if I’d known I was talking to him?
We turn a corner, and I can’t help but gasp.
I’ve never seen anything this big before. Of course, a kingdom like Vsenrog would need a massive stable, but knowing something and seeing it are two different things.
This is spectacular.
Exercise rings circle a massive pitched roof just below the garden. Horses knicker and snort as they stick their heads out of their stall doors. The grounds swarm with people pushing wheelbarrows and carrying pitchforks. As I watch, a groom leads a beautiful blood mare through the wide doors.
“I’ll introduce you to the stable master,” he says. “I’ll make sure you are afforded all the privileges I’ve been granted.”
I don’t realize I’ve stopped walking until he takes my arm and turns me toward him.
“I need to leave the city,” he continues in his low, soft voice. “King’s orders. I’m—”
He hesitates. Behind us, a sharp whinny rises in the air. He frowns, and his expression darkens.
“I’m not a prince,” he says. “Not really. Not of Vsenrog, at least. And that means you are no longer a princess. I have no friends inside those walls, and neither do you.”
My mouth hangs open as my mind grasps frantically for a response. And comes up empty.
“Be careful,” he says. “And trust no one.”
With that, he takes my hand and leads me toward the massive stables of Vsenrog.