Chapter 9 #5
By the time he felt he’d accomplished what he’d set out to do, I was admittedly a little sore, still throbbing in the aftermath.
Despite my wobbly knees, I stood, tugged my hoodie down as far as I could, walked to the door to pick my things up, tried the knob to find it locked, and motioned for him to let me out.
Kehl was still flopped to his ass on the floor, a puddle of his own multiple releases painting his furry thighs, pooling beneath him.
Kehl found his feet and stumbled his way over.
I was fighting tears as he unlocked the door and went so far as to open it for me.
With Cy’s fur wrapped around me, offering me some semblance of decency, I rushed out, right into the middle of a blizzarding wonderland. I didn’t care. I kept walking.
“Wait for Kehl. Purr-roo! Kehl show,” he called out to me, but I just kept walking.
No actual destination in mind, I just needed to get away from him, and fast.
The first furred male I ran into, nearly running right into them, I blurted, “Could you show me the way to the females’ huts?”
A thick arm lifted and the male pointed a bit more to the left than I’d been going.
“Thank you,” I mumbled as I rushed past.
“You’re welcome,” the beastman called softly.
After a moment, I heard footsteps behind me and whirled around angrily, expecting Khel.
It was the male I’d asked for directions.
The snarl on my lips fell and I sighed heavily. “I’m sorry. I thought you were someone else.”
The male grinned and dipped his head in a nod. “It’s understandable,” he chuckled with a shrug. Jerking his chin in the direction I was headed, he fell into step beside me. “Let me show you where. My Mina will want to know all about the fresh meat,” he joked.
“You talk so well,” I blurted as we walked.
“Bia,” the male introduced himself. “I’m Mina’s. My Mama is Dorothy. You met her yesterday. You’re Prudence.”
I nodded and slipped my hand from my thick fur blanket to offer him a short wave.
He frowned thoughtfully as he pointed out things that would help me find my way in future. “I thought Mama said you were staying with Kehl.”
“Didn’t really work out,” was all I was willing to offer.
He nodded knowingly. “Kehl insists he never wants a mate.”
“Yes,” I said simply.
“But you smell like his mate to me,” he pointed out, then gave a sniff. “And some kind of herb…”
“Peppermint,” I answered for him, hoping he left it at that. “Kehl isn’t overly fond of peppermint. Kind of a deal breaker for me, I’m afraid,” I muttered.
Bia just nodded, though he looked surprised to hear it was me that broke it off with Kehl.
“He just let you go?” he blurted curiously.
“It was mutual.” Giving him a look, I muttered, “I don’t really want to talk about it. I just want to get to this hut I’m supposed to stay at and settle in.”
“Did Kehl say what hut because after the last heavy snow I thought two of them needed major repairs?”
I shook my head. “We had an argument. I just wanted to get the hell out of there.” It was close enough to the truth I thought it should pass the sniff a lie detector test.
“There’s one hut that’s liveable but the female staying there… I wouldn’t force her company on any being.” He got a little growly as he spoke of this person, whoever they were.
“We still keep my hut. We won’t mind if you stay there. Would that be alright with you?” he asked. “We keep it stocked up, just in case.”
“Thank you.” I gave a short nod. “That would be wonderful.”
“Good. I’ll take you there then. It’s this way.”
Following Bia, the farther I tromped away from Khel, the worse the ugly feeling churning in my stomach grew.
By the time we reached the hut Bia had offered, I was snow soggy, a headache brewing, nausea roiling. I just wanted to be alone with my miserable self and my headache inducing thoughts.
The hut was cute, small, a cozy bungalow of Yeti beastman living.
Bia asked if I knew how to start a fire with the items he held out to me.
When I admitted I could he stood to watch me start a fire up with the little lint ball of fur and flintlike rock, waiting until I had it going and ready to add a log on before he’d admit he was impressed.
“Wild and Woolly. It was a youth wilderness survival club the place I grew up in used to host most summers. My mom helped run it until I outgrew it.”
“I’m impressed.” Bia smiled then. “Are you and your mother close?”
“We were.” Glancing around, I walked over to a small window and closed the cutesy little curtains on it.
Turning around to find Bia studying me, I answered the question he didn’t ask, knowing he’d probably picked up the way I’d bristled at his comment. “She died last year. Both of my parents did. It’s all still feeling new and weird for me.”
He nodded and then gave me a short tour of where they kept things.
“Heads up. Mama will most likely be coming back to check on you. It’s her way.
” He shrugged but sounded apologetic. I got the impression he understood my wanting to be left alone.
“Daisy might too. She’s a busybody know-it-all type, or that’s what my Mina says, but don’t tell anyone I said that.
” He grinned then. “I’ll deny it. A tip when dealing with Cottontail— that’s what Joanie likes to call her— she’s a pushover.
If she’s bothering you just tell her. She’ll take the hint. ”
“I don’t have any way to repay you,” I blurted.
“Give my Mina a chance when you meet her, that’s thanks enough for me,” he said simply. “If you’re anything like Joanie was describing you, you two will get along great,” he laughingly added as he closed the door behind him and set off.
The second I no longer heard his footsteps, I rushed to the door and locked it.
Walking back to the bed, I kicked out of my boots and curled up with Cy’s blanket atop the fluffy blankets covered midsized bed.
Hands slipping inside the front pocket of my hoodie, I pulled out the Polaroid and stared at it.
Cy’s beaming face and Elm’s old man scowl made me smile just as much as it hurt my heart.
I missed him. Elm too, if I was being truthful with myself. I’d never stopped missing them. I’ll never know what was in Elm’s box of ‘Us’ as he’d referred to it.
It felt like every single time the universe threw me a bone, it crumbled the second it was right there within my reach.
Smacking a kiss to my picture, I reached over and set it and the ring box on the table nearby. Dragging Cy’s blanket over my face, I allowed myself a real moment to grieve. For what was, what could have been, what will never be.
My world as I knew it didn’t exist anymore. THIS is my life now.
My hand fell to my stomach and I bit my lip, struggling to hold back tears. I then slid my hand over my heart, clutching the material of my sweatshirt over it. My free hand slid over my mouth to stifle the sob trying to escape.
I tried to hold it all back so hard I felt a blood vessel pop in my left eye.
Once more, life smacked me over the head with its lesson. It was starting to feel like it was beating a dead horse.
Life isn’t fair. It rarely ever is. Then you die. The End.
Having it all out, letting it seep out of me as quietly as possible, I fell asleep clutching Cy’s blanket to my nose and wishing it was him.
If wishes were fishes, we’d all cast nets. My father’s favorite phrase poked at me.
I suck at fishing and you know it, I’d quipped the first time I’d heard it and he never let me forget it. I was about eight at the time. It was so ridiculous it never failed to make him laugh.
It was such a stupid, silly thing, and made that near to constant ache fill with pain anew.
I’d thought before I had nothing. That was nothing compared to the nothing of now.
No family, no friends, no men that I love openly in my life, lost to my home planet, my piddly life. I literally had nothing and no one. I was utterly alone. The thought followed me into my dreams, the running theme.